Thar Be Pirates!

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OK, it might be mean to enjoy Roger Ebert's wicked review of the Olsen Twins' feature film debut, but damn, how else would we know that music pirates are the bad guys?

If this is part of the effort to "educate" the young on copyrights and wrongs, Hollywood is indeed doomed.

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  1. All of thier previous films have either been straight to video or TV movies. My guess is they’re trying to make the transition to adult actoresses, and over come their child-star past. To their credit, their acting skills have improved over the years. Their early stuff is very, very bad. Eventually they’re going to have to realize they can only take the twin thing so far, and do indepent work if they want to stay in the business.

  2. “they’re going to have to realize they can only take the twin thing so far”

    they haven’t taken the twin thing nearly as far as most of their fan’s fathers would like….

  3. Andy Richter’s post-Conan career would appear to be in trouble.

  4. Whatever information we got out of those detained Iraqis probably could have been gotten just as easily by forcing them to watch Mary Kate and Ashley movies.

    Given a choice, I know I’d rather smash my thumb with a hammer than have to watch one of their movies every night for a week.

  5. Anon said:
    “They haven’t taken the twin thing nearly as far as most of their fan’s fathers would like…”

    Will posting to this site get me in trouble with the kiddie-porn kops?

    Not that there’s not everything wrong with that.

    Can I say “do*b*e d*l*o” without getting banned forever?

    Testing…testing…

  6. I love it when Ebert hates a movie and goes sarcastic: “Because the movie all takes place during one day and Roxy is being chased by a truant officer, it compares itself to ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.’ It might as reasonably compare itself to ‘The Third Man’ because they wade through sewers.”

    OK, so who’s the third twin?

  7. Jeff, if you’re gonna start a thread about movies (yeah, I know it’s about piracy), couldn’t you at least start one about Super-Size Me which would at least generate a shitload of wacky comments? And Ebert’s review of that movie is pretty funny ’cause he hardly even mentions the film itself.

  8. Ebert is a very sick man. I know he’s always been a bad reviewer, but lately he can barely remember what’s happened. I say leave him alone and let him die in peace.

  9. I thought the bald guy died..

  10. Jeff, are you sure this is the Olsen’s “feature film debut?” Haven’t they starred in several feature-length films already?

  11. I’m pretty sure all their previous offerings were the straight to video kind, but I could be wrong.

  12. Brilliant review–it mentioned more than enough of the movie for me to get the flavor, the concept, and the warning…

  13. I wonder if the music pirates smoke cigarettes, too. That would, like, make them totally double-evil and stuff, ya know?

  14. I wonder if the music pirates smoke cigarettes, too. That would, like, make them totally double-evil and stuff, ya know?

  15. “Feature-length” is not the same as “Feature Film.” “Feature Film” means it runs in theaters, while “feature-length” means that it could have run in theaters (that it was a long enough)had it not sucked and gone straight to video, like the previous Olsen twins’ offerings.

  16. Did you guys know that the Olsens aren’t identical but fratenal twins? That ruins the whole thing. They’re just regular sisters. Big deal.

  17. I saw the mary-kate and ashley movie…and being a teen i could really understand the whole music pirating thing. i know people who do that..and its good that the teen demographic knows that pirating music is illegal.
    by the way, this is a great site…my mom showed it to me and showed me that this post was on it. i read others and are a really good alternative to left wing news reports and opinions on tv and other websites. thanks for being so open minded to people of all politcals parties and walks.
    ~KaTiE

  18. I saw the mary-kate and ashley movie…and being a teen i could really understand the whole music pirating thing. i know people who do that..and its good that the teen demographic knows that pirating music is illegal.
    by the way, this is a great site…my mom showed it to me and showed me that this post was on it. i read others and are a really good alternative to left wing news reports and opinions on tv and other websites. thanks for being so open minded to people of all politcals parties and walks.
    ~KaTiE

  19. I saw the mary-kate and ashley movie…and being a teen i could really understand the whole music pirating thing. i know people who do that..and its good that the teen demographic knows that pirating music is illegal.
    by the way, this is a great site…my mom showed it to me and showed me that this post was on it. i read others and are a really good alternative to left wing news reports and opinions on tv and other websites. thanks for being so open minded to people of all politcals parties and walks.
    ~KaTiE

  20. I saw the mary-kate and ashley movie…and being a teen i could really understand the whole music pirating thing. i know people who do that..and its good that the teen demographic knows that pirating music is illegal.
    by the way, this is a great site…my mom showed it to me and showed me that this post was on it. i read others and are a really good alternative to left wing news reports and opinions on tv and other websites. thanks for being so open minded to people of all politcals parties and walks.
    ~KaTiE

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