Conspiracy Theories

Conspiracy Corner


While mainstream pundits blame David Kelly's death on the Blair administration or the BBC, Sherman Skolnick and Lenny Bloom are fingering a different culprit. The late scientist, they write, "was snuffed out after he threatened to go public with documents that would incriminate Queen Elizabeth II as a usurper to the English Throne and expose her many skeletons in the closet. She is a Hessian from the German House of Hanover and with her husband assassinated the true heir to the English Throne namely Princess Diana of Wales, Head of the House of Stuart."

And the intrigue doesn't stop there!

Queen Elizabeth II, as actually the true head of the United States, sent her P.M. Tony Blair to inform President Bush of the necessity to wipe out Dr. Kelly, a top official of British MI-6 counter-intelligence, for the survival of the fraudulent House of Windsor. No longer trusting so-called secure telecommunications, Blair went to Washington in person.

By the end of the article, our frustrated screenwriters have invoked the Rothschilds, Hapsburg blackmailers, and the Pope, "who has long desired control over the Throne of England and like Caesar, the capture of Jerusalem, thus nullifying the Arabs and the Jews." Strangely absent: the Knights of Malta, the Priory of Sion, the Bavarian Illuminati, and Yog-Sothoth.


NEXT: A Picture Is Worth a Thousand Wrongful Arrests

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  1. The Eschaton is being imminentized as we sit around with our thumbs up our asses. I’m heading for the shelter.

  2. That’ll jump up at least 10 points after Armstrong beats Ulrich in the TT on saturday. Vive la tour de france.

  3. The Bavarian Illuminati in modern times is properly known as Skull&Bones. I highly recommend the book “An introduction to the order of Skull&Bones” by Antony C. Sutton.

  4. Idiot, they only want you to think the skull and bones is the Bavarian Illuminati, while they do their fould deeds behind your back.

  5. What !?! They completely missed out on the obvious involvment of the Cathars, the 36 Invisibles and Kaiser Soze.

    Ughhh, how naive are these guys ?

  6. What about the Elders of Zion?

  7. “Queen Elizabeth II, as actually the true head of the United States”

    Easily the most curious line in the piece.

  8. yet it would explain so much…

  9. ‘ “Queen Elizabeth II, as actually the true head of the United States”

    Easily the most curious line in the piece.’

    We are not amused.

  10. What does Lyndon LaRouche have to say about all this?

  11. Maybe he is the Queen? And the true head of the US?

  12. No mention of the Greys and the Denver Airport yet. You guys are behind the curve.

    Plus we all know Clinton is going to use Y2K as an excuse to declare martial law! Then the chinese army waiting just across the mexican border will invade under the auspices of the UN.

    /always liked that one. . . makes me sightly nostalgic for the 90s, when we were innocent, and Chris Farley taught us to laugh again.

  13. Thank goodness I’ve good several billion in counterfeit hemp script hidden under my bed.

  14. It’s a shame- I was so hoping for some mention of the Masonic Bro… I mean, Stone Cutters.

  15. Well, the eschaton may not be immanentized right at this moment, but if you go to the blog Eschaton, that account is pretty close to what you’ll get from the lefties. (You can find similar accounts at DU as well…)

  16. Uh, how was Diana supposed to have traced her Stuart Lineage? I though the current “King over the water” was some guy with a German name living in Vatican City or Liechtenstein, or some damned thing.

    How is Princess Diana different from $20? You could probably scrape twenty bucks together if you had to. What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Volvo? Diana wouldn’t be caught dead in a Volvo. How’s a Mercedes like a squid? You have to cut them both open to get the Di out.

    BTW, I thought it would be really cool if LaRouche DID get elected from prison. It would sure make things awkward, what with summit meetings and all.

  17. The “frustrated screenwriters” comment made me think – haven’t I seen this on TV somewhere? It’s a wackier x-files with no aliens, and I’m sure it’d make great television, if it isn’t already. I love the idea of the Queen of England actually and truly ruling the world!

  18. There’s a stroy from horror author Bentley Little in which a man finds out that the British really won the Revolutionary war and enacted our system of government as a ruse to hide their control over us. It’s his short story collection, imaginatively entitled The Collection, and it’s pretty good.

    I’m actually surprised there is no mention of aliens in article. The site seems largely devoted to alien conspiracy theories when not worrying about Jewish conspiracy theories or how drinking milk is a scam foisted on us by America’s dairy producers. What a bunch of whackjobs. I do have to commend them for the fact they have a hotline you can call if you have a Bigfoot sighting. That’ll come in handy.

  19. I hope you lot realize that, in mocking conspiracy theorists, you display a disturbing familiarity with their work.

  20. Yeah, and then there’s the whole Franco-American spaghettio’s connection. Who the hell ever heard of French spaghetti, I ask you.

  21. What about the Free Masons and the Tri-Lats, or are they just front organizations to throw the dedicated pursuers of truth of the scent?

  22. T,

    See there’s this line between fantasy and reality, and some of us, the lucky few, can discern which side is which. It is sort of like TV, or movies, or books, or any fiction really. You can know a lot about, find it amusing, and yet still know what’s real and what’s not.

  23. What about the Tuetonic Knights, or the Knights Hospitallers?

    BTW, how is Diana related to the Stuarts? The last Stuart with anything like a direct claim to the thrones of Scotland and England died in the lattter part of the 18th century after all, Henry IX is what he styled himself as I recall (as he was a bishop, he had no heirs), and the British have had sausage eaters on their throne since George I was shipped over from Hanover when Anne I croaked in 1714.

    My favorite English monarch is of course ?thelred II, known as ?thelred the Unready. He succeeded to the throne after the murder of his half-brother, Edward II, known as Edward the Martyr, at the age of ten. ?thelred’s reign was rather long and bumbling, and notable for him having to pay danegeld out the arse, and his flight to Normandy in 1013 to escape the Vikings. Returning in 1014, he croaked in London in 1016, to be followed by the Dane Canute the Great.

  24. I can’t believe a knowledgable group like this hasn’t brought up the hidden lizards and Cillary Clinton yet.

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