What Would Jesus (Rivera) Drive?

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A pro-SUV group is turning the tables on the "What Would Jesus Drive?" campaign with newspaper ads that show a smiling SUV owner and ask, "What Would Jesus (Rivera) Drive?" A.P. reports:

Rivera says he likes his SUV—which has logged 150,000 miles—because it gets him through the snow in winter. He says his wife likes it because she can easily transport their grandchildren.

"For millions of people like Jesus Rivera, it's all about safety, utility and versatility. Maybe that's why they call them SUVs," the ad says, before urging SUV owners to protect their rights.

[Thanks to Jim Nelson for the link.]

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  1. and i bet Jesus likes his tax deduction he gets on his SUV, too.

  2. We rolled our brand spanking new mini-SUV on I-10 on a bright sunny day. Swerved too hard to avoid a collision. Totally destroyed the car.

    So screw that. Getting the new Honda Accord. Handles like a dream. Already have a truck. Have fun with your SUVs. Just don’t OD on them. Get that sedan as well.

  3. “Vines, a consultant with the public relations firm Stratacomm, is a former vice president of communications for Ford Motor Co.”

    Nothing wrong with astroturf, as long as you know it’s (probably) not real grass.

  4. Also, enjoy this blast-from-the-past of another grass-roots group.

  5. Fyodor, I have scene a couple of articles that suggest that the roll over rate of SUV’s plus the damage they cause to smaller cars in simple fender benders is causing car insurance premiums to increase across the board. I always attributed this to an excuse to raise rates by the insurance industry. Regardless if its realistic or just an excuse, I would say that if premium increases are attributed to SUV’s, then it is indeed an nuisance to those of us who don’t own one, don’t need to own one, nor plan on ever owning one. I am not anti-SUV, just giving a nuisance that we all can appreciate.

  6. maybe it is increaseing because of bad drivers

  7. So long as MacDonald-Douglass does’t do a campaign asking:

    “What would Mohammad fly?”

  8. Why would there be a spontaneous increase in bad drivers? If anything, driving is become more and more an integral part of society and we would expect driving skills and driver responsibility to increase.

  9. Who owns whom? At 40 grand a pop I doubt that many SUV “owners” have a title in their lock box – more like a pink slip from their finance company. 7 year loans are now the fad, lessors are losing their ass on returns and homeowners have re-fied all they can. SUV’s are going the way of the brontosaurus.

  10. I bought a used one in college for 12K.

  11. Idiot. I bought a HOUSE for less than that in college and sold it for 3 times what I gave.

  12. I paid $3500 cash for a 94 Jeep Cherokee a year ago. Much as I hate to admit it, that was from a dealer, but I was desperate and all the private party Jeeps I looked at had various “problems.”

  13. That is all well and good, but my college days ended in May, buttfuck. If you can tell me where I can buy a house for 12k, I will go down on you.

  14. So what? It’s obvious why people like SUV’s and it’s besides the point anyway. The question remains open whether they’re a tangible enough nuisance to warrant complaints from others.

  15. Nobody fucks the The Jesus!

  16. ARRRGHHH!!! Nobody fucks with The Jesus!

  17. Annapolis, Missouri. In the Ozarks right down the road from Glover. You can make a living chopping wood or maybe in the lead mine. Houses are cheap and you have an actual use for your 4wd.

    Now, about those homosexual tendencies…

  18. She said “house,” not chicken shack.

  19. “SUV’s are going the way of the brontosaurus.” Actually, Lefty, “crossover vehicles,” usually based on car frames, are doing quite well; it’s just the monsters that are stagnating. They’re going to start with the hybrid engine SUVs next year.

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