Tonight's Opening Saturday Night Live Sketch


My prediction:

Iraqi information minister Muhammad Said al-Sahhaf is at his microphone.

Sahhaf: "The Republican Guard is in full control. We have counterattacked and retaken Saddam International Airport—"

The lights flicker on and off. Sahhaf pauses.

Sahhaf: "The rotten criminals are on the run—"

Automatic weapons fire is heard offstage.

Sahhaf: "Now we are cutting off the head of the snake—"

Marines enter from right and left and start taking down the flag and the picture of Saddam behind Sahhaf.

Sahhaf: "We have defeated them, in fact we have crushed them—"

Marines remove the wall behind Sahhaf to reveal that he is actually in NBC's Today Show studio at 49th Street.

Sahhaf: "The snake is trying to flee as we cut it into pieces—:"

Marines pick up Sahhaf's seat with him still in it, and start carrying him off stage left. He keeps giving his speech as he's carried out, etc.