Like a Snake

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Hate to be the bearer of bad news, but tongue-forking body modification may soon be made illegal in Illinois. So if you were thinking about heading to the Windy City to take the plunge, which I know you were, you'd better get on it right away.

NEXT: Maniacal Dictator Funnies

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  1. Get off the tongue-forking subject, will ya?! It gets old after a while, and any sane rational person knows not to modify their tongues if they wish to succeed in this life.

  2. Um, this is the certainly the first I’ve heard of it.

    Hey, wait a second–Mr. B., you’re the same guy who said that sane rational people also can’t smoke pot and succeed in this life.

    So come on, Mr. B–tell us your formula for a “sane rational” life, will ya!?

  3. quaker120:

    something like “adhere to my own irrational and insane way of doing as we all know i am right.”

  4. This is just more ridiculous government meddling. Don’t Illinois legislators have more important things to spend time and money on than what is essentially a personal choice that harms no one?

    And unless you’ve been living under a rock for your entire life, you’d know quite well that people become highly successful making all kinds of decisions that not everyone agrees with.

  5. “…any sane rational person knows not to modify their tongues if they wish to succeed in this life.”

    Hey, it may be the next hip, tatooed lawyer look. You get called a snake, why not play the part.

    “My clientssssss innocenccccce is plainly ssssupported by the factsssss.”

  6. Didn’t Carol Mosley-Braun have a forked tongue…all that talk about not taking welfare money for her campaing yet the records showed something else?

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