Speaking of Super Sizing…


A judge has thrown out the NY lawsuit charging that McDonald's was responsible for the girth of a large pair of sisters, ages 14 and 19.

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  1. I am truly amazed! All this time, I thought common sense was dead.

  2. While the conclusion to this suit was never in doubt from the microsecond it was filed, that didn’t stop the business class from making a big deal about it. They are curiously silent on the recent mistaken double mastectomy, however.

  3. On behalf of the corporation and our operating units, we would like to thank everyone at Reason for their excellent coverage of our legal predicament. Your support during this trying ordeal warms our hearts like a batch of fries under a heatlamp.

    Yours truly,

    The Hamburglar
    V.P. Public Relations
    McDonalds Corporation

  4. Dear Hamburglar,
    I’d like my lifetime supply of hot apple pies delivered three times daily, until I’m too fat to lift my arm to my maw.
    Glad to be of service,

  5. Hey, Barney! Nobody thought tobacco could lose, either.

  6. “Homer, you took off work for the Hamburglar’s birthday on Monday AND Wednesday? Which one is it?”

    Just thought I’d point out that the suit isn’t dead and buried. The judge gave the plaintiffs 30 days to amend their complaint by coming up with evidence to support their claims, some of which the judge said would be “compelling” if demonstrated (like the claim that McDonald’s meat is processed in some dangerous fashion that consumers don’t know about). That said, I’d be very surprised to see them come back with anything new they couldn’t find in the last few months.

  7. >> Just thought I’d point out that the suit isn’t dead and buried.

  8. On the upside, at least teen obesity should reduce the rate of teen pregnancy.

  9. You got a point Steve. I say there’s no time to waste, put that $250,000 cap on now.

  10. Sara:

    I don’t care what McDonald’s done, you leave yore maw out of it. She didn’t do nothin to deserve you raisin yore arm to her!

  11. Very well Morpheus… No Hot Apple Pie for you!

    Sorry, obscure reference folks.

  12. Bad move, for McDonalds, to put a known criminal in charge of their legal department. On the other hand, that’s the premise behind ‘Catch Me if You Can’!

  13. “If plaintiffs were able to flesh out this argument in an amended complaint ….” “flesh this out”, huh? Maybe y’all should flesh it out at the gym instead of the courthouse, fat broads.

  14. Dear Mr. Hamburglar,

    First, let me say that it is a delight that you have managed to find an interpreter to transcribe the furvent mumbling I fondly remember you uttering during my youth. But please, don’t let your corporate censors silence you in public speaking engagements or in commercials any longer. So your mumbling scares the little kids. As George Carlin would say, “Screw the children!”


    T. Stich

  15. EMAIL: nospam@nospampreteen-sex.info
    URL: http://preteen-sex.info
    DATE: 05/21/2004 06:10:51
    Gratitude is merely the secret hope of further favors.

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