How Many Emmys Could the Bush Team Win?

The fictional administration of Democratic President Josiah Bartlet won the hearts and minds of the 13,000 members of the Television Academy of Arts and Sciences last night. NBS's The West Wing won Emmies—those coveted 15 inch gold plated statuettes named after the image orthicon camera tube—for best drama series and as well as for best supporting actress, best supporting actor, and best lead actress. The West Wing's triumph invites us to muse on the truism that Washington is Hollywood for ugly people.

How does Bush Press Secretary Ari Fleischer stack up against Bartlet Press Secretary C.J. Cregg? Answer: Allison Janney is a lot better looking and had a glamorous career as a Hollywood publicist before coming to DC. Fleischer, by contrast, has been flacking for assorted pols for most of his career. However, both Cregg and Fleischer are known for their wit. In order to mock Vice President Al Gore's claim that he spent most of a sleazy White House fundraising conference taking trips to the restroom because he drank too much iced tea, Fleischer once served iced tea to reporters.

What about Bush Chief of Staff Andrew Card against Bartlet Chief of Staff Leo McGarry? Answer: Andrew Card is better looking. However, their careers are not all that different. For example, both served as cabinet secretaries in previous administrations before becoming White House Chiefs of Staff. In real life Card capitalized on his government service by working as an executive for the auto industry. McGarry wins on macho as a former Air Force pilot, though Card did attend the U.S. Merchant Marine Academy.

Finally, what about First Lady Laura Bush vs. First Lady Abigail Bartlet? Answer: Pretty much a tie in the looks department, but Abigail's background as a surgeon gives her the edge brains and arrogance. It is interesting to note that Laura Bush actually lives in the White House with her husband while Abigail Bartlet spends most of her time in New England pursuing her career. Bartlet also participated in a conspiracy to keep her husband's multiple sclerosis from the public.

Finally, despite the many surface affinities between Hollywood and Washington, they do differ. In Washington, "an ounce of perception is worth a pound of performance," while in Hollywood, performance counts.