If you're a teenager in Sioux Falls, Iowa, you better be in by 11 p.m. Teens caught outside after curfew are handcuffed, taken to juvenile detention, and strip searched. Many also report getting grilled on how often they go to church and whether they are sexually active.

In Bureau County, Illinois, Sheriff Greg Johnson–already under investigation for allegedly misusing county money–has a new legal woe. It seems he objected when his 19-year-old daughter had her tongue pierced. So he tried to rip the stud out of her mouth.

You'd better watch your mouth if you go to Laguna Beach, California. Really. The police there now keep tabs on anyone caught uttering a racial slur. Making such remarks isn't a crime, so no one will be arrested. But offenders will be logged into a database for future reference.

In each episode of South Park, a character named Kenny is killed. A Canadian woman has objected to this, arguing that she has a son named Kenny and that the repeated death of his namesake may cause him anguish. Therefore, she concludes, the show should be banned–or, at the very least, the character's name should be changed. She proposes "Dweebie or Doofus or any name that has no potential of deeply hurting the psyche of any Canadian." Yeah–like there aren't millions of Canucks who answer to Doofus.

Another cartoon, however, is in the clear up north: The Canadian Broadcasting Standards Council has decided not to ban Bugs Bunny. A viewer had complained the cartoons were sexist, objecting specifically to a short in which Bugs escapes from a witch by dousing her in magical powder. The witch is transformed into a beautiful female rabbit. As the two walk off, Bugs turns to the viewer and says, "Sure, I know! But aren't they all witches inside?"

In Wales, a court has suspended three policemen for 28 days for riding their motorbikes at 110 mph, well above the 70 mph speed limit. They got off easy: A civilian caught riding above 100 mph in Wales faces a hefty fine and loss of his license for up to five years.

In Palm Beach County, Florida, a sheriff's deputy was captured on videotape stopping a 9-year-old boy for riding a bicycle without a helmet. In addition to ticketing the boy, the deputy handcuffed him and pushed him to the ground. The department says he did nothing improper.

And in Mesa, Arizona, the powers that be have pulled the plug on a junior high school performance of a play based on Tom Sawyer. School officials found the play, and the book, to be racist. They also decreed that it's offensive to women, to police officers, and to churchgoers.