Banning Doorknobs, Frat Parties, and "God Bless America" Signs?! Nanny of the Month (‘13-11)

They make it their business to mind your business. And recently busybodies have made it their business to ban doorknobs in Vancouver (next stop: your town?), and fraternity parties in Boston--if thrown by MIT students (who sometimes jump up and down on plexiglass skylights, fall four stories, and injure their head and genitals).

But this time the busiest bodies of all can be found in Bartow, Florida, where code officials threatened to fine residents who stuck “God Bless America” signs on their lawns. Some residents were outraged by what they regarded as an attack on religion and patriotism. The city says its beef is with temporary lawn signs themselves and not the content of the signs, but many residents were outraged the sign ban exists at all.

And all the outrage may end up paying off. Chastened by the the blowback, officials have agreed to let the signs stay for now, and may ultimately allow homeowners to decide what should adorn their lawns.

1 minute and 18 seconds.

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Nanny of the Month is written and produced by Ted Balaker (@tedbalaker). Motion graphics by Matt Edwards (@MattChrisEd) and research by Edwards and Hannah Earl. Opening graphics by Meredith Bragg.

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  • Caleb Turberville||

    I nominate the puritanical commenters in the Tuccille thread for Nanny of the Month.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Unregulated titties lead to unchecked workplace boners which result in increased unemployment which the state has an interest in.

  • Radioactive||

    I have a boner right this minute, and I'm not unemployed...

  • Radioactive||

    just checking

  • miley820||

    Im being thankful.. Google is paying 75$/hour! Just work for few hours & spend more time with friends and family. On sunday I bought themselves a Alfa Romeo from having made $5637 this month. its the best-job Ive ever had.It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it out

  • Radioactive||

    free titties for everyone

  • ||

    Can't women do something about hard nipples protruding through their tops?

    It's very distracting.

  • Free Society||

    I work in the insurance industry, which as you might have guessed, means that I interact with hot titties all day long. Some days I get an erection that lasts more than 4 hours, it's just a workers comp claim waiting to happen. We need to regulate hot tits.

  • ||

    I hear you. Worked in financial services for 10 years and there was always cross-working with insurance reps. Hotties all round. Problem is, I never seemed to be a part of the sleeping around crowd.

  • Free Society||

    The trick is to use industry jargon. Ask if you can take a look at her 'underwriting' to make sure all of her 'liabilities' are properly 'covered'. They'll know what it means...

  • Jon Lester||

    Someone there should put up signs reading "God Damn America," just to give everyone a lesson in free speech fairness.

  • C. S. P. Schofield||

    OK, hold it. Leftwing fashion-protests, such as those that were damn near ubiquitous during the Bush administration, do say that, or variations even ruder. Contrary to the assertion of the Left ("We're being silenced!") the vast majority of the twits that make those signs do not vanish in the middle of the night, and if they do it's likelier to have something to do with their bookie than the government.

    The lesson you propose is superfluous.

  • Jon Lester||

    Some of the same people sensing persecution here are the same ones who wanted to silence Rev. Jeremiah Wright, without debating what he said, and you know it.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    How can you have a Nanny of the Month who is actually backtracking on its nannying? I expect my Nanny of the Month to hold fast on its nannying.

  • Doctor Whom||

    may ultimately allow homeowners to decide what should adorn their lawns.

    Insert reductio ad Somaliam here.

  • SQRLSY One||

    “Insert reductio ad Somaliam here.”
    Well ya know, Governments Almighty world-wide just can NOT tolerate such things as un-regulated doorknobs and yard signs; they are clearly the starting move on a rapid slide that leads towards pot-smoking and then abortion and then dis-belief in global warmerering and then universal genocide against the human race… How can anyone NOT see such obvious truths?

  • ||

    Why does there have to be a law governing knobs or levers? Just let people choose what they prefer and/or need.


  • Zeb||

    Well that one's easy. Without rules like that the companies who make up building codes and publish them wouldn't make as much money and would have to seek rent elsewhere. Won't anyone think of the building code publishing industry?

  • mr simple||

    But then people might choose poorly. And we all know what happens then.

  • Entropy Void||

    I'll trade you Kanukistaners my door knobs for your toilets.


  • The DerpRider||

    I went to Western Michigan where in one semester we were actually put on double probation and they banned fraternities from providing alcohol to any non members at parties. Talk about making us work for coeds...

  • kevrob||

    ...and if he had no doorknob, where would Joe Fratboy hang his tie or sock, to let his roomie know that Love Central was occupado? He'd have to swipe one of those motel "Do Not Disturb" signs that will fit on a lever-style door.

    Kevin R

  • Entropy Void||

    They never get laid at Vancouver U.

    Not a problem.

  • James Taggart||

    Haben Sie eine Genehmigung für die Türklinke?

  • SQRLSY One||

    Essen Zee bitte mien Grossen Schlong, du dump-kopf! Heute Deutschelant, morgen der gonz-weldt! Deutsche-lant Uber Alles!!! Ich bin ein bear-weiner! Mein bear-weiner ist grosser dant yer bear-weiner! Macht machts rechtich! Hacken Creutz told me so, so THERE! - From BEYOND where the Hocken-Creutzchens Howl!

  • SQRLSY One||

    Drey drei mal um den Kirsch-schitpzel! Kindern, Kirshce, unt kuchen, know yer place!

  • SQRLSY One||

    Um, you’ll have to excuzen Zie me, Bitte, I got into the schnaptz too much last night. Plus, I hadn’t realized just how easy The Google makes it fer me to X-late stuff & stuff.
    What I had meant to sagen ist, “Mein Bär - Schlange ist grosser als Ihr Bären - Schlange.“

  • juliajuli145||

    until I looked at the check which was of $4814, I be certain mom in-law could actually bringing home money in there spare time on-line.. there aunt started doing this for under 20 months and at present cleared the debts on their appartment and got a top of the range Ford Mustang. why not try this out


  • Car Scanner||

    That's interesting.

  • Great+Grandma||

    On the blogs, hate filled rhetoric almost always comes from the left and it's the left that tries to control free speech. It's the left that's full of hate speech and it's the left that is intolerant about nearly everything the right does and it's the left that blames everyone else for these things.

    Wish they'd look in the mirror occasionally when they're thinking about who causes what problems.

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