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He's Really Just Sick the of the Kelly Holcomb Jokes
A Kentucy lawmaker wants to ban . . . well . . .most of you.
Kentucky Representative Tim Couch filed a bill this week to make anonymous posting online illegal.
If the bill becomes law, the website operator would have to pay if someone was allowed to post anonymously on their site. The fine would be five-hundred dollars for a first offense and one-thousand dollars for each offense after that.
Representative Couch says he filed the bill in hopes of cutting down on online bullying.
Anonymous|3.10.08 @ 9:13PM|#
Let me guess: Dan T. talked Tim Couch into this, after all the impersonators.
Eric Dondero|3.10.08 @ 9:22PM|#
Hey, not to change the subject, but no mention of Elliot Spitzer
scandal here at Reason today? It's like the biggest issue on all
Cable News and the entire Blogosphere.
Surely there's a libertarian angle on the Spitzer scandal
story?
Fluffy|3.10.08 @ 9:24PM|#
Here's the problem:
How do you check ID?
If I register that my real name and address are "George Dumbass
Bush" and "1600 Pennsylvania Ave" how the hell are you supposed to
know that ain't me?
Who thinks this is just another thing this Kentucky legislator
didn't think through, like dating his sister and swimming in the
Ohio River near a sewage treatment plant?
|3.10.08 @ 9:29PM|#
Two observations:
Has this clown been trading on his name similarity to the
quarterback (still an asset in KY if a liability in Ohio)?
Is our? Donderoo now part of his legislative staff?
|3.10.08 @ 9:37PM|#
Radley. Come on. Cleveland Browns fans have had enough
heartbreak without some Colts-loving punk opening up old
wounds.
We now have a Pro-Bowl quarterback in Derek Anderson and a stud
waiting in the wings in Brady Quinn. We prefer to forget about the
Couch-Holcomb days, thank you.
And when I call you a punk, I mean it with love.
hamilton|3.10.08 @ 9:41PM|#
Not to mention you have a coach descended from the right hand of
God, from our perspective here in New England.
Oh, and screw Tim Couch. I need my anonymous crutch identity to
pretend I have something worth covering up. Not, sadly, 1K-per-day
booty.
|3.10.08 @ 9:44PM|#
he can introduce a bill banning thermodynamics, too, for all the good it will do him. yawn.
|3.10.08 @ 9:49PM|#
Not to mention you have a coach descended from the right
hand of God, from our perspective here in New England.
18 and 1
Sorry. As a bitter Cowboys fan I couldn't resist.
|3.10.08 @ 9:50PM|#
Oh yeah? Well, I watched your QB in the Pro Bowl, and he stank.
(And Brad Quinn is an effete momma's boy.) That spot should have
gone to a real QB from a team that actually made the playoffs, like
David Garrard.
Now, I just need to apply an aetherial purple-nurple, and my abuse
of internet anonymity will be complete. And there's nothing you can
do about it, Representative Couch!
|3.10.08 @ 9:57PM|#
Let's make a deal. He can have this if congress members have to be present on the floor for every vote and they have to provide identification and their every vote is recorded. If a member misses , say, 5 votes, they get fired without severance or retirement.
|3.10.08 @ 9:59PM|#
and maybe a test for working knowledge of everything they are voting on? sort of a no congresscritter left behind thing?
|3.10.08 @ 10:01PM|#
Matt J
18-1 is a better record than any team in history can claim so I
hope you weren't trying to taunt us with it. Don't make me bring up
the Red Sox, Celtics and Revolution. (good thing the Bruins are in
the middle of the pack or the rest of the country would send a
lynch mob)
|3.10.08 @ 10:01PM|#
As a Kentucky native, I council y'all to reckon this as just
another forward stride in proudly keeping the Commonwealth on the
cuttin' edge of Blue Laws and other questionable legislation.
My favorite is this part of the Oath of Office (last revised in
1891):
"and I do further solemnly swear (or affirm) that since the adoption of the present Constitution, I, being a citizen of this State, have not fought a duel with deadly weapons within this State nor out of it, nor have I sent or accepted a challenge to fight a duel with deadly weapons, nor have I acted as second in carrying a challenge, nor aided or assisted any person thus offending, so help me God."
Tom Brady|3.10.08 @ 10:04PM|#
18-1 is a better record than any team in history can
claim
That's what I tell myself every morning.
(sob)
|3.10.08 @ 10:06PM|#
Fucking A, Donderasshole, pay fucking attention.
First you call guys here that have actual military service - not
just filling out forms - cowards and pussies, but now you don't
even bother to read and find out whats current on this blog.
What the fuck, has that case of syphilis that you got from that
whore in Manila eaten what little brain you had away?
Why don't you just fuck off pussy pen pushing supply clerk.
Someone Who Doesn\'t Want to L|3.10.08 @ 10:09PM|#
Well, at least he won't prevent me from posting.
"Someone Who Doesn't Want to Lose His Job" is actually my given
name.
My phone number is 555-PLOW.
Nephilium|3.10.08 @ 10:10PM|#
John-David:
As a fellow Cleveland resident... I need to help you out here... we
will not win a championship in any major sport...
We'd lose our record of 30+ years with no championships... :)
Nephilium
|3.10.08 @ 10:15PM|#
Erÿk Boston, Pre-Esq.,
Whatever lets you sleep at night man.
18-1
18-1
18-1
18-1
18-1
18-1
18-1
Don Shula|3.10.08 @ 10:16PM|#
18-1 is a better record than any team in history can
claim
1. '72 Dolphins 17-0 1.000
2. '07 Patriots 18-1 0.947
|3.10.08 @ 10:16PM|#
I wonder if this guy has the smarts to pick up the distinction between being anonymous and using a nom-de-plume?
AnonymousRacistWhiteGuy(who ma|3.10.08 @ 10:18PM|#
Nigger.
Kike.
Honky.
Spick.
Meatball.
Gook.
Coon.
All just words. Except meatball. That's a wonderfully delicious,
and intrinsically racist, food, so sue me!
Ali|3.10.08 @ 10:30PM|#
There is a typo in the title. Just saying. Radley, Couch could sue you for poor spelling, too, you know.
Mr. Chartreuse|3.10.08 @ 10:35PM|#
First they came for Fluffy, and I did nothing because I wasn't a
Fluffy. Then they came for Someone Who Doesn't Want to Lose His
Job, and I still did nothing because I wasn't a SWDWTLHJ. Then they
came for me and there was no one left to type up for me.
Oh yeah, go fuck yourself Couch.
|3.10.08 @ 10:36PM|#
New England Revolution...our soccer team. You seem to have
missed their made for Hollywood bicycle kick that earned them a
trip to the championship game.
To save a few tedious questions, the Celtics are our Basketball
team - currently 50-12 (they've held the best record all season)
and the Red Sox play baseball - currently World Series champs.
Mr. Chartreuse|3.10.08 @ 10:37PM|#
BTW, Who the fuck are the Revolution?
They play in MLS, which will be starting soon thank God.
penxv|3.10.08 @ 10:37PM|#
Funny thing is... that guy probably got elected on name
recognition alone.
You've got to get in where you fit in, I guess.
|3.10.08 @ 10:46PM|#
"and I do further solemnly swear (or affirm) that since the adoption of the present Constitution, I, being a citizen of this State, have not fought a duel with deadly weapons within this State nor out of it, nor have I sent or accepted a challenge to fight a duel with deadly weapons, nor have I acted as second in carrying a challenge, nor aided or assisted any person thus offending, so help me God."
You know, maybe that's the problem. We no longer have members of
the self-appointed leadership class blasting away at one another
with flintlocks.
Anonymous|3.10.08 @ 11:03PM|#
NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS NIGGERS
|3.10.08 @ 11:15PM|#
Isn't being MLS champ pretty much the soccer world's equivalent
to winning the Arena Bowl? Maybe I'm being to harsh - The Grey
Cup?
As for the Celtics - You're talking to a Mavs fan. Nobody knows
better than us that your regular season record don't mean
dick.
Red Sox - You got me there. Way to go Massholes!
Now back to the Pats -
18-1
18-1
18-1
18-1
18-1
18-1
18-1
Talk to me again when you have two more rings.
Mike Laursens of the World|3.10.08 @ 11:17PM|#
Tim Couch can go fuck himself.
See, you can bully people with your real name, too.
Mike Laursens of the World|3.10.08 @ 11:19PM|#
Representative Couch says he filed the bill in hopes of
cutting down on online bullying. He says that has especially been a
problem in his Eastern Kentucky district.
First of all, why would Eastern Kentucky be any different from any
other place? Second, how the hell could he know that?
alan|3.10.08 @ 11:19PM|#
Damn Kasay for giving the Pats their second Super Bowl win with
that off side kick.
Pats, the worst 18-1 team in the history of the game.
Hats off to those outstanding American and Dominican boys who form
the greatest baseball team in America, the Boston Red Sox.
Jim Anderson (no, really)|3.10.08 @ 11:23PM|#
So long, damned Federalist Papers, and your pseudonymous troll of an author, Publius.
|3.10.08 @ 11:26PM|#
Pfft. Other than the pretense of calling myself "mad", I'm
safe.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Rep. Couch.
alan|3.10.08 @ 11:27PM|#
As for this Couch .
I propose the Protect Our Children's Constitution Act of 20XX
.
It would simply give any congressman the right to make a complaint
about the Constitutionality of any measure that is proposed. If the
ruling body, ideally a panel of judges or legal scholars, find the
proposal in dereliction of the Constitution, the sponsors of the
offending bill forfeit a years salary that they clearly did not
deserve due to not obeying their oath of office.
|3.10.08 @ 11:35PM|#
First of all, why would Eastern Kentucky be any different
from any other place? Second, how the hell could he know
that?
Third, since when do people in Eastern Kentucky have computers?
Rimfax|3.10.08 @ 11:44PM|#
OK, OK,...my real name is Elliot Spitzer. Please send all correspondence to the Emperor's Club.
a Duoist|3.11.08 @ 12:10AM|#
Well then, goodbye to 'Mark Twain.' And if we're going to arrest
and fine all Kentuckians for not using their actual full name,
goodbye to 'Honest Abe,' 'The Railsplitter,' and 'Giant
Killer.'
Has anyone started a collection to buy Mr. Couch a one-way ticket
to the country of his choice where they restrict pen names? North
Korea? Zimbabwe? Iran? Cuba?
ex-[spaces]|3.11.08 @ 12:14AM|#
Well, shit.
My namelessness has again been besmirched with a boring comment by
someone else who noticed that entering spaces in the name field
leaves it blank.
THERE OUGHTA BE A LAW! FROM KENTUCKY!
|3.11.08 @ 12:31AM|#
So, what are the website dudes supposed to do when I use the address of 1313 Mockingbird Lane, San Diego, 92101?
|3.11.08 @ 12:40AM|#
Is there a reason for this ban?
Ya Kentucky has fucking moron Representative named Tim Couch.
Paul|3.11.08 @ 1:11AM|#
Surely there's a libertarian angle on the Spitzer scandal
story?
Yes. The angle goes something like this:
"This is what you get with government. Are we really
surprised?"
And clearly, apropos of this thread, case in point.
Joshua Corning ---real name even
HAHA!
I will now be the only one who posts at reason!!
Negatory. I win, too. Paul is my name. I'm just not brave (or
foolish enough) to give my last name. I've made enough Seattle
references for people to probably make the guess that I live in the
greater Seattle area. And my last name is so fucking rare that
there be only one of me. I don't need any late night no-knock raids
at my house.
every single irishman is a dru|3.11.08 @ 1:30AM|#
hey did everybody hear ron paul actually won the presidency all his votes were taken away how do you think he raised all that money without corporate interests hundreds of millions donated to paul enough to win the election and he got cheated by a rigged election just to make sure he didn't win this is outrageous
Tim Couch|3.11.08 @ 4:00AM|#
I'm a little baby who doesn't understand the big scary internet somebody explain the tubes plz :'(
Jennifer|3.11.08 @ 8:02AM|#
It's a series of tubes, Tim. And if people hide behind masks, the masks make the tubes get clogged.
|3.11.08 @ 8:13AM|#
18-1 is a great season, though one of those 18, the game against
Baltimore, should have been a loss. They got really lucky on that
one. I didn't understand why everyone considered the Giants to be
such an underdog when the Pats basically lost to the Ravens, who
were probably the worst team in the NFL last year (they lost to the
Dolphins!).
That said, it was only a series of highly improbably occurrences on
that last drive that gave the Giants a chance at winning. Nine
times out of ten that's a sack; nine times out of ten that catch
isn't made; nine times out of ten Buckner--oops, I mean Asante
Samuel--makes that gift interception. The Pats saved all their bad
luck for that last drive. I guess the pressure was too much for
them boys.
Hey, Couch, here's some more ideas for you in a similar vein: (1)
ban solid food so no one will choke; (2) suck my balls.
|3.11.08 @ 9:55AM|#
HAHA!
I will now be the only one who posts at reason!!
I win!
Nay, nay, Joshua.
Donderoooooooooooooo will ber here for you to converse with. Have
fun.
|3.11.08 @ 10:02AM|#
C'mom you internet savants out ther in ReasonLand, Where is Tim
Couch's E-mail address. I'll open up an anonymous internet account
just to troll the dumbass. Does this ignorant yahoo have any
staffers under the age of 40? It doesn't appear that he does.
_____________ (your H&R handle) - I'm going to beat you up on
the tubes. You can report this anonymous cyber-bullying to Rep.
Couch. He'll protect you.
Criminy, just how stupid is the Kentucky electorate? They elected
this morn.
|3.11.08 @ 10:49AM|#
1. '72 Dolphins 17-0 1.000
2. '07 Patriots 18-1 0.947
Yeah, but in fairness to the Pats, the '72 Dolphins played two of
those 17 games against the Starland Vocal Band.
Other Matt|3.11.08 @ 11:35AM|#
It's a series of tubes, Tim. And if people hide behind
masks, the masks make the tubes get clogged.
And what if they had their tubes tied?
|3.11.08 @ 12:20PM|#
I'm always too late to be funny in these threads, if I'm ever funny. Dammit. Tubes, I say!
robc|3.11.08 @ 2:05PM|#
Just wanted to point out that Rep Tim Couch has his mailing address in Hyden, KY which happens to be the hometown of the QB too.
|3.11.08 @ 3:41PM|#
18-1 is a better record than any team in history can
claim
Actually, its not. 18-0 was, but the Dolphin's 16-0 beats 18-1
every time.
anonyMouse|3.11.08 @ 9:41PM|#
J sub, et al
here's the web page to email him -- I'm pretty sure you could
fashion a process to spam it.
http://www.lrc.ky.gov/Mailform/H090.htm
|3.12.08 @ 1:02AM|#
Well I'm safe, but wouldn't this probably increase internet bullying? Hey you just called me an asshole over the internet, I'm gonna come attack you etc etc etc etc etc
|3.12.08 @ 9:56AM|#
Go ahead and try, Tim, my boy! Pass a law in your little back roads shit hole. I can think of half a dozen websites that give out e-mail addresses and I've got Tor. Tell you what, I'll raise you one, go ahead and make this federal. We'll just come from an offshore node. You cannot stop anonymous comments, you cannot control information on the internet. Welcome to the future.
|3.12.08 @ 10:36AM|#
I'm entirely for the libertarian angle on prostitution. But if I were, say, Tim Couch or Eliot Spitzer, and I tried to pass that bill in Kentucky or New York, I would very quickly lose my job. Hence the need for anonymity, driven entirely by the hypocritical public moralizing of Couch, Spitzer, et. al.
|3.12.08 @ 11:32AM|#
Of course, anonymity on the internet is just a myth. The
government is fully capable of pressuring a web site owner to
provide IP address information, and using that info to ID the
poster.
All that Couch is doing is forbidding the government to maintain
the charade. Perhaps he should get the Unintentionally Libertarian
Award for the year.
|3.12.08 @ 12:22PM|#
If I register that my real name and address are "George
Dumbass Bush" and "1600 Pennsylvania Ave" how the hell are you
supposed to know that ain't me?
Because you spelled "dumbass" correctly.
|3.12.08 @ 10:30PM|#
Tim Crouch is an ignorant douchebag. I'd like to beat him up and take his lunch money.
Anon E. Muss|3.13.08 @ 2:41PM|#
Sounds like Tim Crouch doesn't quite know what the "inter-web" actually is. Banning comments? Come on.
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