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Democratic Debate: The Remy Rap

Remy out-Democrats Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders in last night's CNN debate.

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Remy out-Democrats Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders in last night's CNN debate.

Approximately 1:30 minutes.

Written and performed by Remy. Music mastered by Ben Karlstrom. Video by Meredith and Austin Bragg.

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LYRICS:

Free college tuition?
That's still too much money
My plan is free college tuition
AND we give you a twenty

The most progressive dude up here
best re-read your treatises
Yeah, I spoke on Wall Street
TO A PILE OF FETUSES

Free healthcare, free schools
free clothing, free energy
You go to the Post Office
overnight anything

This isn't rocket science
no need to act cleverly
If it was any easier
it'd be Celebrity Jeopardy

Angry Santa complaining
maybe take a warm bath
Dude, you been a Democrat
for like a day and a half

She learned from Ted Kennedy
I learned from him after
He taught me to drive
then swim shortly thereafter

Voted for the Brady Bill
and Dodd-Frank at first glance
I got an "F" from the NRA
and also in math

The banks are too big
They're act like casinos
They're too big to fail
Can you grab that mosquito

Staying in NATO
talk about a disaster
I would rather play Twister
with a sweaty Denny Hastert

My plan to beat ISIS
they gonna be running
when this president comes after them
with TWO reset buttons

And "superpredator" over here
your Crime Bill's tough
Bet you'll be regretting them sentencing guidelines
in a couple of months

In my first 100 days
I'm-a make it my mission
to find why colleges with lazy rivers
are raising tuition

Carolina bathroom law
That song is a sad tune
Lactose is the only intolerance
you should face in a bathroom