Democratic Debate: The Remy Rap
Remy out-Democrats Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders in last night's CNN debate.
Remy out-Democrats Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders in last night's CNN debate.
Approximately 1:30 minutes.
Written and performed by Remy. Music mastered by Ben Karlstrom. Video by Meredith and Austin Bragg.
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LYRICS:
Free college tuition?
That's still too much money
My plan is free college tuition
AND we give you a twenty
The most progressive dude up here
best re-read your treatises
Yeah, I spoke on Wall Street
TO A PILE OF FETUSES
Free healthcare, free schools
free clothing, free energy
You go to the Post Office
overnight anything
This isn't rocket science
no need to act cleverly
If it was any easier
it'd be Celebrity Jeopardy
Angry Santa complaining
maybe take a warm bath
Dude, you been a Democrat
for like a day and a half
She learned from Ted Kennedy
I learned from him after
He taught me to drive
then swim shortly thereafter
Voted for the Brady Bill
and Dodd-Frank at first glance
I got an "F" from the NRA
and also in math
The banks are too big
They're act like casinos
They're too big to fail
Can you grab that mosquito
Staying in NATO
talk about a disaster
I would rather play Twister
with a sweaty Denny Hastert
My plan to beat ISIS
they gonna be running
when this president comes after them
with TWO reset buttons
And "superpredator" over here
your Crime Bill's tough
Bet you'll be regretting them sentencing guidelines
in a couple of months
In my first 100 days
I'm-a make it my mission
to find why colleges with lazy rivers
are raising tuition
Carolina bathroom law
That song is a sad tune
Lactose is the only intolerance
you should face in a bathroom
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ACE!
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Mosquito had me laughing even more than the rest of it, but damn this is good, even if it is rap which I normally can barely tolerate. People like Remy (or Tom Lehrer, or Weird Al) always amaze me. No idea how they can do it, but I'm mighty glad they do.
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Remy 2016!
for coming out the day after, this is pretty darn good.
Lactose is the only intolerance you should face in a bathroom
Anti-trans-digestive rights cisshitlords every one of 'em!
Props to Remy.
I got an "F" from the NRA
and also in math
Bravo
Still no "Shave My Legs in the Tub".
You are a treasure.
I just looked up some pictures of young Bernie Sanders and was amused to see how much he looked like Pajama Boy.
Fun fact about Sanders: he couldn't pay his electric bills at his first apt, so he just ran an extension cord to much off his landlord's power.
Scratch a socialist, find a loser.
" "I remember him running an extension cord down to the basement. He couldn't pay his bills." He worked some as a carpenter, although "he was a shitty carpenter," Bloch told me. "His carpentry," Morrisseau said, "was not going to support him, and didn't.""
A brilliant man who should have control over our national economy so that he can reshape the nation in his own image.
If elected, I predict his policies will work out about as well as his spice rack and birdhouse.
I'm reminded of the scene from Unforgiven where water's coming through the roof that Little Bill Dagget's built himself to the point where he's out of catch basins. Completely unable to write, "Bill's" biographer, Mr. Beauchamp, suggests Bill hang the carpenter.
He's from Vermont, home of $8 per pint ice cream. They think anything is possible!
This is the perfect metaphor for Bernie's socialist bullshit. The college kids are the lights of our bright, shining future. Bernie is their extension cord. The rest of us are the people living in the neighboring unit who get to pay for ourselves and them..
* to mooch*
Typos- I make them.
Darcy Troville, a fellow Liberty Unionite who lived around the corner and shared with Sanders homemade jellies and jams.
My God, there were hipsters infesting Brooklyn even back then.
WTF is a "Liberty Unionite"?
And why would have a kid he couldn't afford to take care of...?
He really didn't do shit until he was almost 40. All he's done since is suck at government teats.
Reminds me of another socialist.
Reminds me of another socialist.
Apparently squirrels are also socialists.
"I'm a genius, so how come I'm poor? There must be some conspiracy. It must be those damn rich people hogging all the money. If they just gave some to me, I could pay my bills."
Most young people outgrow this stupidity. It amazes me when I see someone hold the exact same political views their entire life.
Fuck, I lived next door.
Apparently he was stealing your electricity. Probably moocher off your cable too.
*mooched* Fucking tiny ass phone keyboards.
I imagined him gnawing on an orange extention cord.
If your carpentry cannot support anything, then it cannot support you.
*gazes through kitchen window, looks upon wooden deck with pride*
A wide skill set is very useful. It leaves one with employment options if the current gig falls apart.
I can understand why college kids and losers would support Bernie. College kids are young and stupid. Losers are envious of winners.
But what does Bernie's political success say about the citizens of Burlington and Vermont? College kids and losers can't account for 50% of the electorate.
Well, there's your problem, Vern.
Polisci is a magnet for drooling imbeciles.
College is boring and irrelevant, but we need to send everybody body there for free.
Lol
What amused me is that the debate podiums looked like they were on a game show, but scoring no points.
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This isn't rocket science
no need to act cleverly
If it was any easier
it'd be Celebrity Jeopardy
*Shows Wolf Blitzer*
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