Cruz Crushes Trump in Utah, Sanders Takes Utah and Idaho, Brussels Bomber Still on the Loose: A.M. Links

Elizabeth Nolan Brown | 3.23.2016 9:00 AM

(MSNBC)

Donald Trump suffered a major blow in Utah, where Sen. Ted Cruz earned 71 percent of the vote, John Kasich 16 percent, and Trump just 14 percent. "Cruz's big win in Utah means he will get all 40 of the state's delegates to the Republican National Convention," AP reports. Yet Trump still won the most delegates yesterday, picking up 58 from a win in Arizona, where Cruz placed second.
Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders bested Hillary Clinton in Idaho and Utah races, while Clinton won in Arizona.
Sen. Ted Cruz is trying to entice Ohio Gov. John Kasich into dropping out of the Republican presidential race by floating him a spot in a future Cruz administration.
Jeb Bush has endorsed Ted Cruz, saying he hopes the Texas senator will help "overcome the divisiveness and vulgarity" of Donald Trump
Belgian police are still searching for Najim Laachraoui, a suspect in yesterday's attacks in Brussels. While Laachraoui—who was with the two suicide bombers at the Brussels airport yesterday, and whose DNA was found in an apartment connected to the Paris terrorists attacks of 2015—was reported yesterday to have been arrested, this turned out to be false.
Georgia is moving to make solicitation of prostitution a felony.

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Fist of Etiquette 9 years ago

Donald Trump suffered a major blow in Utah...

UTAH IS A TOTAL DUMP EVERYONE SAYS SO
1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
  
  LOSER STATE!
2. Doctor Whom 9 years ago
  
  Hello, It is obviously not a top-quality state.
3. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 9 years ago
  
  Hello.
4. WTF 9 years ago
  
  The state of Utah is a totally overrated clown who speaks without knowing the facts.
  1. Doctor Whom 9 years ago
    
    That's what you think.
5. Idle Hands 9 years ago
  
  I don't know have you ever been to Provo? I think you would do very well there.
  1. a better chipper 9 years ago
    
    +11
6. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
  
  People in Utah can't even buy pants.
  1. NYC2AZ 9 years ago
    
    They buy a lot of special underwear though.
7. Trigger Warning 9 years ago
  
  MORONS LIVE THERE RIGHT
8. EMD 9 years ago
  
  I once "suffered" a major blow in Utah from a Mormon prostitute.
  1. jester 9 years ago
    
    Was he wearing a white shirt and tie? Did he have teeth?
    1. EMD 9 years ago
      
      No, yes, maybe.
9. Bob Meyer 9 years ago
  
  My only experience with Utah was in obtaining a Utah concealed carry permit. The young woman I dealt with was friendly, efficient and helpful. If she was typical then Utah's public service agencies are far easier to deal with than the ones in my home state of Washington.
  1. Rhywun 9 years ago
    
    As a New Yorker I find everyone being "friendly, efficient and helpful" like something out of Body Snatchers. It's not normal.
    1. Trshmnstr, terror of the trash 9 years ago
      
      As my grandmother(-in-law) would say... "Bless your everlovin' heart"
      
      :p
    2. pan fried wylie 9 years ago
      
      you have a problem with romcoms?
  2. Ken Shultz 9 years ago
    
    I go to Utah every summer.
    
    I love Utah.
    1. Sandi 9 years ago
      
      I took a shit in Utah once.
10. Ken Shultz 9 years ago
  
  What Utah says may be racist, but Utah still has the right to say it.
  1. Hank Phillips 9 years ago
    
    True, but as of today Texans have the right to refer to Ted as 'aquel hijo de Utah!'
11. waffles 9 years ago
  
  Utah has some of the best skiing in the world but fuck if it isn't difficult to get a decent buzz while doing it.
  1. Private Chipperbot 9 years ago
    
    Have a friend to goes to Moab every year and they have to stock up on booze in Colorado before making the drive over.
  2. Idle Hands 9 years ago
    
    3.2 Beer, not even once.
    1. Trshmnstr, terror of the trash 9 years ago
      
      Jesus made alcohol in higher concentration. There, I said it!
      1. JWatts 9 years ago
        
        Yeah, but Jesus was a Wine snob.
12. buybuydandavis 9 years ago
  
  So the major blow to Donald Trump was winning 60% of the delegates in play for the day. Boohoo for The Donald.
13. Hank Phillips 9 years ago
  
  He's lucky it wasn't Georgia...
Bee Tagger 9 years ago

"overcome the divisiveness and vulgarity" of Donald Trump

Heh, he said come.
Fist of Etiquette 9 years ago

Jeb Bush has endorsed Ted Cruz, saying he hopes the Texas senator will help "overcome the divisiveness and vulgarity" of Donald Trump.

Looking to Ted Cruz for civility. That's what it's come to for Jeb Bush.
1. Shirley Knott 9 years ago
  
  The fact that he said this is a good indicator of why he's no longer part of the race.
  Cruz for civility? Ending divisiveness?
  Hah. And again for the sake of courtesy, hah.
2. WTF 9 years ago
  
  "Please clap."
  1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
    
    That is how I will forever remember Jeb!
3. Chipwooder 9 years ago
  
  well, he's not a short-fingered vulgarian, so....
  1. WTF 9 years ago
    
    You're the vulgarian, you FUCK!
Bee Tagger 9 years ago

Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders bested Hillary Clinton in Idaho and Utah primaries, while Clinton won in Arizona.

What does this say about the millennial presence in each of those states? We desperately don't want to know.
1. KDN 9 years ago
  
  I bet it says more about the proportion of white people in each state.
  1. DenverJ 9 years ago
    
    #whitevotesmatter
Fist of Etiquette 9 years ago

Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders bested Hillary Clinton in Idaho and Utah primaries, while Clinton won in Arizona.

Yeah, it's a real race over there on the Dem side.
1. Tonio 9 years ago
  
  Indeed. My derpbook is disappointingly quiet this morning. I was hoping for some delicious Dem in-fighting with both camps calling for the other's candidate to quit the race.
  1. Lee G 9 years ago
    
    Here you go
    
    http://www.democraticunderground.com/10027707207
  2. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    Bernie fans were complaining that hillary is in the lead due to voter suppression
    1. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
      
      You know who else was accused of voter suppression...
      1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
        
        Wojciech Jaruzelski?
      2. jester 9 years ago
        
        Witold Lutoslawski? Zbigniev Brzezinski? Mikolay Kopernik?
      3. Trshmnstr, terror of the trash 9 years ago
        
        Me when I told my political science professor that I supported the voter ID law?
        
        JWatts 9 years ago
        
        And racism too, right?
  3. Old Man With Candy 9 years ago
    
    My derpbook feed is full of outraged progs (yes, I know, that's redundant) screaming about how the Arizona election was STOLEN from Our Lord Bernard by that satanic woman. Of course, they'll all line up behind Hildebeest when comes November.
    1. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 9 years ago
      
      I prefer Saint Bernard.
      1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
        
        *opera applause*
      2. spqr2008 9 years ago
        
        Now, I could get behind Saint Bernie if he has one of those flask things around his neck and gives out free brandy to everyone!
        
        JWatts 9 years ago
        
        "...and gives out free brandy to everyone!"
        
        And by "free" Saint Bernie means paid for by the taxpayers, of course.
    2. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
      
      These are the same folks that say they are all about the will of the people
      1. WTF 9 years ago
        
        "The people have spoken - the bastards!"
        - Dick Tuck
2. Jerryskids 9 years ago
  
  The fact that Sanders is still hanging in there and Hillary's looking less inevitable (and more indictable) is what's keeping Kasich's hopes alive that he may emerge as a consensus candidate at the convention.
  1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    I don't think Hillary is getting indicted...if she was, it would have happened by now. Being swept under the rug
    1. BigT 9 years ago
      
      You can bet that the Donald will keep this on the front page.
      1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
        
        Oh he will...then they will ignore it.
    2. Jerryskids 9 years ago
      
      Whether or not she's getting indicted is beside the point - if the fix isn't in for Hillary one way or another then the fix doesn't exist - it's all about appearances. Kasich would be a better Democrat candidate, fewer skeletons in the closet and more sensible policy prescriptions, a track record of leadership, a solid campaign infrastructure, plus he has some crossover appeal to the GOP.
      
      Seriously - if you had Sanders as the D nominee, Trump as the R and Kasich as an Independent, which of those best represent the solid Establishment middle and which the third-party fringe?
      1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
        
        I guess i was a little confused by what you meant Kasich as a consensus at the convention. He is running as an R. And hillary is obviously a D...so i am not sure what hillary being indicted or less inevitable really has to do with the prospect of Kasich with respect to being the R guy.
        
        Jerryskids 9 years ago
        
        "Kasich is running as an R" pretty much says it all. The "joke" is that I think Kasich has a better shot at being nominated as a compromise candidate at the D convention than at the R convention. It's not a joke.
        
        JWatts 9 years ago
        
        Kasich stands a good chance of coming out of the nomination as the VP candidate. He's playing hard ball by staying in the race. At this point, assuming, Trump doesn't win out right, Kasich can probably convince enough of his delegates to push either Cruz or Trump over the top.
        
        Tornado16nb 9 years ago
        
        Ah i see...thanks. I agree.
3. Curt 9 years ago
  
  Amusingly, most of the headlines I've seen focused on Hilary winning one state and ignored or downplayed Sanders victories. Sure, AZ has as many delegates as ID and UT combined. But, Sanders got almost 80% of vote in those two states. And he is set to get more (pledged) delegates than her from the three states combined.
  1. Red Rocks Rockin 9 years ago
    
    That's one of the interesting things about yesterday--the current 2nd-placers absolutely destroyed the front-runners in ID and UT. I'm actually surprised Cruz didn't do better in AZ due to the large Mormon population there.
    1. prolefeed 9 years ago
      
      AZ isn't nearly as Mormon as Utah, Idaho, or American Samoa (Samoa is about 25% LDS):
      
      Here are the top ten states with the highest Mormon population by percentage of total population
      
      1. Utah 68.2%
      2. Idaho 26.2%
      3. Wyoming 11.1%
      4. Nevada 6.47%
      5. Arizona 5.96%
      
      Cruz did well in the LDS prevalent states because Trump dissed Mormons, while I think Sanders did well in those states because the Democratic non-Mormons in those states are sick of establishment Mormons pushing them around, so Sanders won their protest vote.
Fist of Etiquette 9 years ago

...was reported yesterday to have been arrested, this turned out to be false.

Did the twittersphere news service let us down again? DAMN YOU TWITTERSPHERE NEWS SERVICE!
SugarFree 9 years ago

All 15 Democrats in Idaho really handed Hillary her own ass.
1. robc 9 years ago
  
  So did the 3 in Utah.
  1. WTF 9 years ago
    
    "What's a Ute?"
    1. Overt 9 years ago
      
      +2 Utes & 1 Limited Slip Diff
      1. AlmightyJB 9 years ago
        
        You blend
        
        Chipwooder 9 years ago
        
        Famous fuh yah mud? How's yah Chinese food?
      2. Tilting at Windmills 9 years ago
        
        The 2 Utes exiting the Sack o Suds did not have PosiTraction!
    2. jester 9 years ago
      
      Bernie won the ute's vote.
  2. straffinrun 9 years ago
    
    They make a cute couple.
    1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
      
      *narrows gaze*
      
      Don't think you got away with that one, strafe.
      1. straffinrun 9 years ago
        
        I never think.
2. Aloysious 9 years ago
  
  Bernie Sanders wins Idaho Democratic presidential caucus
  
  That year the state's Democrats held the caucus on Super Tuesday, and Obama spoke at a rally on the Boise State University campus the Saturday before. Roughly 14,000 people turned out.
  
  State Democratic Party leaders said they saw a repeat of record number of caucus-goers this year.
  
  Four of Idaho's most populated counties had to make last-minute changes to expand or add new caucus venues to accommodate the expected large crowds.
  
  There are Democrats in Idaho, primarily in the southern part. Don't forget, Idaho elected Frank Church.
  1. SugarFree 9 years ago
    
    Way to step on my joke, Al. Jeez.
    1. Aloysious 9 years ago
      
      I'm socially awkward. With big feet. And I eat potatoes.
      1. Lee G 9 years ago
        
        A pleasure to meet you Mr. Gamgee
        
        Tilting at Windmills 9 years ago
        
        "Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew!"
  2. Chipwooder 9 years ago
    
    Frank Church left office 35 years ago.
    1. SugarFree 9 years ago
      
      If you remember stuff, we are never going to get anywhere.
    2. Jerryskids 9 years ago
      
      Frank Church was the one responsible for FISA and the secret FISA court that secretly rubber-stamps the secret intelligence services secret authorizations to secretly invade all our privacy that Edward Sowden exposed, right? And despite all the historical evidence to the contrary insisted with a straight face that he was shocked - shocked! - to discover many years later that government agencies might possibly abuse their trust and authority and go far beyond the bounds of laws and rules and morals and ethics and human decency? That Frank Church?
      1. jester 9 years ago
        
        They named a National Widerness after him. That's where his checks on government overreach dwell.
Bee Tagger 9 years ago

Sen. Ted Cruz is trying to entice Ohio Gov. John Kasich into dropping out of the Republican presidential race by floating him a spot in a future Cruz administration.

You know who else dropped out because he listened to Cruz? How did that work out for Goose?
1. Hamster of Doom 9 years ago
  
  No homo.
2. Tonio 9 years ago
  
  VP. That's why Kasich has been hanging on for this long.
  1. Fist of Etiquette 9 years ago
    
    All he brings is Ohio. PASS.
  2. BigT 9 years ago
    
    VP. That's why Kasich has been hanging on for this long.
    
    He claims not to be interested in VP. Perhaps Sec Treasury or Fed Reserve. He sees himself as an econ guru.
    1. CatoTheChipper 9 years ago
      
      Sec Treas and Fed Chair have to be the easiest jobs in the world. Sec Treas just authorizes the creation of bonds to get the cash that government spends. Occasionally, he has to tell Congress to authorize some more bonds that he needs to bail out Wall Street. Fed Chair just authorizes creation of money to buy the bonds from primary dealers who buy the bonds at issue and immediately sell them after a small mark-up. Periodically she has to tweak the overnight interest rate.
      
      All of their functions could easily be automated except for the fear-mongering necessary when Wall Street needs another bailout.
      1. CE 9 years ago
        
        That would be so cool, to have your own signature on US currency, and to be able to print more whenever you wanted.
      2. Akira 9 years ago
        
        No, the "progressives" have assured me that being a CEO of a company is the easiest job in the world and that you totally, like, don't have to do any work all day, man!
MetalBard 9 years ago

"Jeb Bush has endorsed Ted Cruz, saying he hopes the Texas senator will help "overcome the divisiveness and vulgarity" of Donald Trump"

Every election year the Democrats accuse whatever Republican that is running of a being a racist, woman hating, homophobe who wants to starve poor people, and bring back slavery. To me that is far more divisive and vulgar then any of the stupid shit that has come out of Trump's mouth.
1. WTF 9 years ago
  
  You're not supposed to notice that shit.
2. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
  
  It's only divisive racist fear-mongering when Republicans do it.
  1. Hank Phillips 9 years ago
    
    Is that quoting the Old Dutch Clock or the Chinese Plate?
Fist of Etiquette 9 years ago

It would also put convicted twice-convicted customers on the state's sex offender registry.

Someone's got a hardon to make the registry utterly meaningless.
1. Zeb 9 years ago
  
  It becomes very clear that it's just about extra punishment and not about public safety. It's right up there with the meth dealer registry idea some states have kicked around.
2. straffinrun 9 years ago
  
  You're not on the registry? What are you, some kind of fag?
  1. AlmightyJB 9 years ago
    
    He has a woodchipper so he never gets caught.
3. Lee G 9 years ago
  
  Meaningless until they sentence you to jail time for not registering your address fast enough or coming with a thousand miles of someone under 18
  1. Doctor Whom 9 years ago
    
    Or living in a forbidden place, which is sometimes the entire county except the land under a highway overpass.
    1. CE 9 years ago
      
      A van down by the river should work too.
Zeb 9 years ago

What could possibly go wrong?

How hard could it be?
1. Tonio 9 years ago
  
  You assume they are honest and rational. They really think they can legislate consensual behavior.
  1. Zeb 9 years ago
    
    You assume they are honest and rational.
    
    But only as a rhetorical device.
SugarFree 9 years ago

Donald Trump suffered a major blow in Utah...

Mormon girls take it on the chin.
1. Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper 9 years ago
  
  Go on...
  1. Libertarian 9 years ago
    
    Ooh, I hope there's a happy ending to this.
    1. Citizen X 9 years ago
      
      In the writings of SugarFree, "happy ending" doesn't mean what you want "happy ending" to mean.
      1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 9 years ago
        
        Nobody's happy except mr. Hugeman.
  2. WTF 9 years ago
    
    You sure about that? It is SugarFree, afterall.
    1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
      
      *shudders*
  3. jester 9 years ago
    
    ...and they call eachother brother and sister to keep it extra creepy.
2. WTF 9 years ago
  
  +1 pearl necklace
3. Tonio 9 years ago
  
  Amateurs.
  1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
    
    Stands to begin thunderous ovation*
    1. Tonio 9 years ago
      
      Thanks.
  2. SugarFree 9 years ago
    
    They can't swallow. That's how they were told you get pregnant.
    1. straffinrun 9 years ago
      
      It would depend on where she spit.
      1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
        
        Or was hit by a bus?
        
        /Tony
        
        WTF 9 years ago
        
        That was some great derp.
        
        a better chipper 9 years ago
        
        I'm glad this joke still lives on
        
        a better chipper 9 years ago
        
        I'm glad this joke still lives on
    2. jester 9 years ago
      
      Swallows come...to Capistrano.
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

Police: NY man led cops on chase that ended at ham raffle

The Livingston County Sheriff's Office says deputies tried to pull over 31-year-old John Palermo of Rochester as he drove on Interstate 390 on Saturday night. Police say Palermo exited the highway and drove into Avon (AY'-vahn), 20 miles south of Rochester.

Palermo sped across several lawns before stopping at the East Avon fire hall and running inside.

He tried to blend in with the crowd attending a ham raffle, but an off-duty deputy who's also a volunteer firefighter helped capture him.
1. Zeb 9 years ago
  
  What's with the pronunciation help for Avon? How the hell else would you pronounce Avon?
  1. Libertarian 9 years ago
    
    Sign of the times, as whites slowly become a minority in the U.S.
    1. Zeb 9 years ago
      
      Not sure how that's relevant.
      1. WTF 9 years ago
        
        "Ah-bone"
        
        Zeb 9 years ago
        
        Can we just stop it with the constant masturbation references.
  2. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 9 years ago
    
    Ah-vone.
  3. KDN 9 years ago
    
    Avon-by-the-Sea (often called simply Avon) is a borough in Monmouth County, New Jersey, United States, As of the 2010 United States Census, the borough's population was 1,901,[7][8][9] reflecting a decline of 343 (-15.3%) from the 2,244 counted in the 2000 Census, which had in turn increased by 79 (+3.6%) from the 2,165 counted in the 1990 Census.[18] The borough's name is pronounced "Ah-von" (not "Ay-von").[19][20]
    
    I should note that the "ah" is a little long, like the first syllable in adversity but if there was no d. It's a bit jarring the first time you hear it.
  4. DrZaius 9 years ago
    
    There's some other town near Rochester called Chile. But it's pronounced Chee-lie, or something like that. I guess when you're not bowling you think up ways to mispronounce common names in upstate New York.
    1. Jerryskids 9 years ago
      
      Buck Hannon, Georgia. Spelt Buchanan.
      1. Jerryskids 9 years ago
        
        Or How Stun County, Georgia. Spelt Houston. But I think that pronunciation isn't unique to Georgia.
        
        Chipwooder 9 years ago
        
        Houston St in NYC is pronounced that way too
        
        Zeb 9 years ago
        
        I think Houston Texas is the unusually pronounced one.
        
        Akira 9 years ago
        
        There's a "HOW-stun" in Ohio, too. We also have a town called Russia (pronounced "ROO-shee").
        
        EMD 9 years ago
        
        Nothing beats Ohio for mispronunciations.
        
        Bellefontaine = Bell Fountain
        Rio Grande = Ry-o Grahn-day
        Lima = Lye-ma
        Versailles = Ver-sales
      2. Chipwooder 9 years ago
        
        Pulaski, VA is pronounced Pew-laski and not Pull-aski. Also, Tazewell is pronounced Tazzwell.
        
        Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 9 years ago
        
        it's spelt Raymond Luxury Yach-t, but it's pronounced 'Throatwobbler Mangrove'.
        
        Citizen X 9 years ago
        
        Thomas Jefferson's house's name is MontiCHello, but the street named after it in Norfolk is pronounced MontiSello.
    2. UnCivilServant 9 years ago
      
      Zaius, it's spelled Chili and the locals mispronounce it as "Chai Lai"
    3. JD the elder 9 years ago
      
      Bogota, NJ is pronounced "Buh-GOAT-uh", not like the city in Colombia. And Versailles, MO, is pronounced Ver-SAILS.
    4. B.P. 9 years ago
      
      New Berlin, NY, with the accent on the first syllable.
      
      Of course there's Versailles, KY (pronounced Versails), Lima, OH (Lie-ma), etc.
    5. R C Dean 9 years ago
      
      I've seen "El Dorado" pronounced "El Do-ray-do" and "El Do-rah-do".
      
      Also, "Houghton" pronounced "How-ton" and "Hoe-ton".
  5. Rhywun 9 years ago
    
    How the hell else would you pronounce Avon?
    
    Not as shown - it's wrong. Since I am from Rochester I can correct it. The 'a' is pronounced like the 'a' in 'apple'.
Tornado16nb 9 years ago

I wonder how the white progs who fawn all over the comrade now feel about minorities who are denying the comrade his place in heaven
1. Doctor Whom 9 years ago
  
  Never underestimate the power of doublethink.
  1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    Haha it is funny as i see Sanders supporters now saying they want to buy off the super-delegates and flip them. Whereas before they were concerned about the will of the people not being heard.
2. Tonio 9 years ago
  
  "False consciousness." Duh.
3. Jerryskids 9 years ago
  
  Same way the anti-establishment Trump supporters will feel about their anti-establishment hero pointing to how many establishment figures support him as proof of how thoroughly establishment he is. There's a reason it's called hero worship and a cult of personality and not hero admiration and an organization of personality.
  1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    Good point
4. CatoTheChipper 9 years ago
  
  They have an expression for this phenomenon: false consciousness.
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

Allison Pearson: why stay in the EU when its capital is also the capital of jihadism in Europe?

Thanks to open borders within the EU, and a fatally lax approach to vetting refugees, the lives of millions of Europeans have been put at risk. The head of Europol warned recently that there are 5,000 Isis-trained jihadists at large in Europe after returning from Syrian training camps. Yet, the arrogant, unelected leaders in Brussels are so wedded to their unattainable ideal of ever closer union that they will not countenance putting a stop to the free movement of citizens.

Well, they may have no choice. On Tuesday, the border between France and Belgium was sealed. If it had been closed since November then Abdeslam would not have been able to dump his suicide vest, drive back to Brussels and plan more atrocities. Innocent men and women have been sacrificed on the altar of free movement.
1. Zeb 9 years ago
  
  Because he couldn't possibly have planned more atrocities in France? Or managed to find a way to cross the border illegally?
2. Lee G 9 years ago
  
  The refugee crisis combined with the inevitable currency crisis is going to end the EU.
  1. Rhywun 9 years ago
    
    I'm surprised it's lasted this long. Nobody's getting anything out of it except the noted "arrogant, unelected leaders".
3. Libertarian 9 years ago
  
  "On Tuesday, the border between France and Belgium was sealed."
  
  I gleefully await Trump or Cruz making this a talking point with Clinton.
  1. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 9 years ago
    
    And then they will be attacked from within! What they need is to do is seal the sealed borders!
    
    THE CALLS ARE COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE!
  2. BigT 9 years ago
    
    Just wait until Merkel builds a wall around Germany. Unprecedented!
    1. straffinrun 9 years ago
      
      No, just build a wall around Merkel.
      1. WTF 9 years ago
        
        Growing up in East Germany, she would have some experience with walls, I imagine.
    2. EMD 9 years ago
      
      Mrs. Merkel ... build up this wall!
4. Just say Nikki 9 years ago
  
  Innocent men and women have been sacrificed on the altar of free movement.
  
  John has a fan.
5. Jerryskids 9 years ago
  
  Damn, do we have to send Melissa Click over there to find some muscles? Don't they have some sort of action hero they could use to stop these evil villains? Or is the only one they've got trapped inside a paper bag?
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

Two refugees set themselves on fire out of protest for Borders Closure

Two men poured gasoline on their clothes and set them on fire on Tuesday morning at the Idomei refugees camp. Other refugees who were standing by managed to extinguished the fire and save their lives. But both men suffered injuries and were transferred to hospitals in Kilkis and Thessaloniki, reports the Athens news Agency.

With their action, the two refugees reportedly wanted to protest the appalling conditions at Idomeni camp and the closure of the borders.

The action triggered tension among the other refugees who stated to chant "Open borders".
1. Tonio 9 years ago
  
  Something something free medical care something.
2. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
  
  Greek fire??
  1. jester 9 years ago
    
    Greece fires require extra effort to extinguish.
3. DrZaius 9 years ago
  
  Have they not heard of Amazon.com?
  1. EMD 9 years ago
    
    or Barnes and Noble?
4. Free Society 9 years ago
  
  Oh no! Two welfare shoppers just lit themselves on fire. How will Europe recover from this devastating loss?
5. waffles 9 years ago
  
  Does setting oneself ablaze every work? Seems like a desperate move with little payoff. Then again I'm an American.
  1. Free Society 9 years ago
    
    People do all kinds of crazy shit to qualify for disability payments.
  2. Rhywun 9 years ago
    
    It's the refugee version of stamping your feet & holding your breath until your cheeks turn purple. And it's as equally effective.
  3. EMD 9 years ago
    
    You could find yourself on a Rage Against the Machine album cover!
6. Suthenboy 9 years ago
  
  I am calling bullshit on that. The instant I read "two refugees set fire to themselves in protest" I instantly guessed they survived. No mention of the extent of their injuries. It was a stunt.
  
  Next one that wants to try that how about he lets me put the gas on him? I didn't think so.
  
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AraOSuSTBmw
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

Measure to hike California's minimum wage to $15 qualifies for ballot

The development comes as a wave of minimum wage increases at the state level sweeps the United States as the federal minimum wage has gone more than six years without an increase from $7.25 an hour.

The California Secretary of State's office said supporters of the measure, pushed by Labor group coalition Lift Up California, had gathered more than the 400,000 signatures needed to have the Fair Wage Act of 2016 placed on the ballot.

"California has led the country on environmental, health and civil rights protections and it's only appropriate that we would become the first state to enact a minimum wage that allows millions of families to live in dignity," Los Angeles County Supervisor Sheila Kuehl said in a statement.
1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
  
  So they are making it even more expensive to live? Aren't they really high in inequality and poverty?
  1. WTF 9 years ago
    
    It's those damn obstructionist Rethuglikkkans!
  2. jester 9 years ago
    
    Poverty level in the US is not poverty. That's why income inequality is the word of choice.
    1. Rhywun 9 years ago
      
      Poverty level in the US is not poverty.
      
      It will be when they inevitably run out of other people's money.
2. Lee G 9 years ago
  
  Fair Wage Act of 2016
  
  So what are they going to do in 2017?
  1. jarflax 9 years ago
    
    Extend unemployment.
3. Libertarian 9 years ago
  
  States experimenting with various policies...............I'm looking forward to the unemployment charts once this experiment gets underway.
  1. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
    
    Robot unemployment will be at an all-time low.
    1. jester 9 years ago
      
      Fast food is about to get a whole lot faster. It's about time.
      1. Rhywun 9 years ago
        
        And friendlier.
  2. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    They will complain when there is even more inequality and lack of jobs...along with a budding welfare state list
4. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
  
  State minimum wage laws at least make more sense than doing it at the federal level.
  
  The actual minimum wage, of course, is zero. It looks like California is in a hurry to replace its fast food workers with robots.
  1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    In california, i think you need at least a 60K a year job to break even and not work
    1. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
      
      So, you're saying that if we mandate a $120K minimum wage, everyone will be rich?
      
      Brilliant!
    2. waffles 9 years ago
      
      Pretty close. And if you want to raise a family on that 60k you better learn how to pinch a penny. It's not the income tax that kills California, it's that every little fee you pay the state (like vehicle registration) is somehow multiple times more expensive than other states.
    3. Mr. Flanders 9 years ago
      
      That sounds about right. Near DC I had to make around $50K/year to afford my own apartment without roommates (actually $60K/year, but I'm adjusting because I spend close to $500/month on student loans). From what I hear, highly populated areas in California are slightly more expensive than the DC area.
  2. Rhywun 9 years ago
    
    State minimum wage laws at least make more sense than doing it at the federal level.
    
    NY is about to find out what 15 dollars an hour is going to do the 3rd world economy outside the Tri-State area. In Cuomo's head Buffalo is just like NYC I guess.
    1. Trshmnstr, terror of the trash 9 years ago
      
      In Cuomo's head Buffalo is just like NYC I guess.doesn't exist.
      1. Rhywun 9 years ago
        
        Ha, very true. His father visited my high school in Rochester sometime in the 80s, so maybe he learned about the area from dad.
        
        Trshmnstr, terror of the trash 9 years ago
        
        To be fair, my entire family in Rochester slobbers on the knob of Cuomo and every shit-prog idea he comes up with, so maybe he just prefers to give the voters what they want, despite the fact that it will bankrupt them.
        
        Rhywun 9 years ago
        
        Depends on the area. The cities aren't very big so they don't dominate the way NYC dominates its region. You don't have to travel very far away from the city of Rochester before you're in Kentucky.
    2. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
      
      Oh, don't misunderstand me, I still think it's a bad idea, particularly in states like NY and CA, where there's such a disparity in cost of living in big cities versus the rest of the state. But it's utterly insane for Washington, DC, to try to legislate a uniform minimum wage that is "fair" (using their definition of the word) in San Francisco, but doesn't bankrupt every business in Mississippi.
      
      Hell, even the federal government's pay scale makes locality adjustments.
      1. Rhywun 9 years ago
        
        No sweat, I wasn't criticizing you. Just pointing out that even the statewide regs are ridiculous.
5. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 9 years ago
  
  So no wage hikes in six years and then paf! Let's double it in one vote?
  
  O.....k.
  
  "California has led the country on environmental, health and civil rights protections and it's only appropriate that we would become the first state to enact a minimum wage that allows millions of families to live in dignity,"
  
  Oh shut up. Dignity is not exclusively tied to a wage you dolt.
  1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    Not even a wage...it is an artificial mandated wage
  2. WTF 9 years ago
    
    And if you are raising a family on minimum wage, the problem is your bad choices. Which other people should not be forced to pay for.
  3. ant1sthenes 9 years ago
    
    Yes, the dignity of unemployment and welfare.
6. BigT 9 years ago
  
  Where will the gardeners and nannies live?
  
  $250K Per Year Salary Could Qualify For Subsidized Housing Under New Palo Alto Plan
  
  Palo Alto is seeking housing solutions for residents who are not among the region's super-rich, but who also earn more than the threshhold to qualify for affordable housing programs.
  
  The city council has unanimously passed a housing plan that would essentially subsidize new housing for what qualifies as middle-class nowadays, families making from $150,000 to $250,000 a year.
  
  The plan would focus on building smaller, downtown units for people who live near transit and don't own cars, along with mixed-use retail and residential developments.
  
  Sky-rocketing housing prices in Palo Alto have left some in limbo; with teachers, firefighters and other government workers not earning enough to afford cost of living.
  
  "I just find it kind of sad that we are reducing ourselves to this small profile of young, rich, mostly white, mostly tech. It's not the community that I moved into 33 years ago," Bean said.
  1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    Won't this drive home prices up even further?
    1. waffles 9 years ago
      
      Feature, not bug.
  2. Old Man With Candy 9 years ago
    
    "I just find it kind of sad that we are reducing ourselves to this small profile of young, rich, mostly white, mostly tech.
    
    Five minutes there will demonstrate that this is total bullshit. Yellow and Indian Brown are more common than white.
    1. Ask Me Abt Waste Fraud & Abuse 9 years ago
      
      Them Injuns don't count as "minorities"! They're Asians!
    2. Mike Laursen 9 years ago
      
      I was going to make the point, although perhaps with a tad more sensitivity.
  3. robc 9 years ago
    
    150-250 is middle class?
    
    I could see the bottom of that range being upper middle class.
    1. robc 9 years ago
      
      I need to see some quintiles before I buy that.
      1. robc 9 years ago
        
        2014, top quintile starts at 129k.
        
        Top quintile is not middle class, imo.
    2. WTF 9 years ago
      
      Depends where you live. In the NYC area, that is solidly middle class.
      1. Jerryskids 9 years ago
        
        No it isn't. Just because you can only afford a middle-class existence in Manhattan or San Fran doesn't make you any less wealthy. If I make barely enough to keep the oxygen generators running in my bio-dome on the Moon, that doesn't somehow make me poor - I do have a bio-dome on the Moon. A millionaire with a thousand-dollar-a-day coke habit may not have much besides a really expensive hobby, but you can't very well say he's so poor he can barely afford shoes.
        
        WTF 9 years ago
        
        Sorry, but a modest house in a NYC suburb with modest cars in the driveway does not make you anything other than middle class. It is certainly not wealthy by any stretch of the imagination, unless the term no longer has any meaning.
        
        robc 9 years ago
        
        You get the value of living near NYC. Which those of us in flyover country dont get.
        
        Wealth has many forms.
        
        There is a bit of rational choice going on here that might not be totally valid, but good first estimate.
        
        It depends what the opportunities are.
        
        If ypur job is 150k in NYC or 125k in KY, that is different than if the options are 150k in NYC vs 75k in KY.
        
        Based on a friends experience, the former is the reality. He was offered 9% more to stop telecommuting and move to NYC. He rejected that offer.
        
        UnCivilServant 9 years ago
        
        You get the value of living near NYC.
        
        [serious]That's an item with negative value there.[/serious]
        
        [sarc]That's why companies have to pay people more to get them to live there[/sarc]
        
        Jerryskids 9 years ago
        
        You can live quite nicely in Damnearalabama, Georgia on $25k per annum, does that make you middle class? No - because you're living in Damnearalabama, Georgia on $25k per annum. You're still trailer park trash. Can you live pretty well in Manhattan on $135k per annum? Maybe not - but neither can 80% of the people in this country on what they make, so guess what? If you're living in Manhattan on $135k you're doing as well or better than 80% of the people in this country.
        
        robc 9 years ago
        
        Jk nails it.
        
        It is trade offs. Smaller housing units in CA but you get something nicer, whatever that is thst makes you want to be in CA. I would say beaches, but that isnt really the draw in NoCal.
        
        Wealth is same either way, or people wouldnt make the trade.
        
        R C Dean 9 years ago
        
        Exactly. To someone living in an expensive city, living in a metro area has value. Otherwise, you wouldn't pay so much to live there.
        
        It doesn't have as much value to me, which is why I don't live in an expensive city. If our cash income is the same, we are just choosing to use it to buy different things.
        
        Mr. Flanders 9 years ago
        
        Yep, I pay around $1.5k a month for a 1 bedroom apartment. I could easily afford a large house in the Midwest with my salary, but I don't move there because I enjoy my location close to DC. I will pay a pretty penny when I buy a house here, too.
        
        Trshmnstr, terror of the trash 9 years ago
        
        I'm really hoping that there are some pockets of affordability the further you get outside of DC proper. The idea of spending that much and getting that little is making me nervous about the decision to take a job out there.
        
        Mr. Flanders 9 years ago
        
        Trshmnstr, there are. You can move to Manassas in Virginia and get some decent pricing on apartments sub-$1K/month. The houses are more affordable too. Granted, there's a reason why the locals call it "man-ass-hole".
        
        Other affordable locations to look at:
        
        Centreville, VA
        Warrenton, VA
        Gainesville, VA
        Dumfries, VA
        Woodbridge, VA ("Hoodbridge")
        
        If you move to any of these locations, you'll be dealing with nightmare traffic during your commute if you work in DC.
        
        Trshmnstr, terror of the trash 9 years ago
        
        Thanks for the info! I'm gonna be out there for 2 weeks this summer, so I may have some questions for you around then. My job will be out by Dulles, so I'm hoping to avoid the traffic in DC proper.
        
        Mr. Flanders 9 years ago
        
        Not a problem. If you live near Dulles and want to avoid traffic, you'll be paying ~$1.2k/month minimum for a 1 bedroom apartment.
        
        The closest reasonable rents (sub-1k/month) would be in Gainesville, but you'll be hitting a shit ton of traffic on route 66 every morning and evening.
        
        Basically, you really can't avoid the traffic if you want a reasonable rent/mortgage around here. It's either (1) pay a high price for housing and live close to Dulles or (2) get affordable pricing and deal with the worst traffic in the country 5 days a week.
        
        There are benefits to being here, though. The salaried jobs are high-paying and mostly secure. I'm about 4 years into my career and I've already doubled my entry-level salary. The area is nearly recession-proof because of the proximity to the federal government. There's plenty to do in DC, too.
      2. Rhywun 9 years ago
        
        The SF area is now more expensive than NYC. And a wealthy suburb south of SF even more so. Another difference in NY is that the prices drop off much more sharply outside the city than in CA. So no... I would say $150K is upper middle class in the NYC area.
    3. Just say Nikki 9 years ago
      
      I could see the top of that range being upper middle class. For a couple with no kids.
      1. robc 9 years ago
        
        I have a kid, am no where near bottom of that range, and am probably bottom of upper middle class.
        
        But I also dont try to live in Palo Alto.
        
        As I pisted above, that entire range is in top quintile. That is upper class. Lower upper class, but still upper class.
        
        robc 9 years ago
        
        Quintiles (2014):
        
        0-29
        29-53
        53-82
        82-129
        129+
        
        Just say Nikki 9 years ago
        
        But if those people left Palo Alto, they wouldn't be making $250k anymore. They only pull that salary because of the local cost of living.
        
        It's completely retarded to even think of class on a national basis like this when the cost of living is so variable locally. You're not upper class if you can't afford a bedroom and bathroom for each family member, private school for all your children, and clothing and accessories at at least "contemporary" designer levels. And people making $150k in Palo Alto couldn't do that with kids.
        
        robc 9 years ago
        
        While they still have to live in CA, they can commute from somewhere cheaper thsn Palo Alto.
        
        And that 250k salary wouldnt be THAT much less in other, less expensive, parts of the country.
        
        robc 9 years ago
        
        From a quick calculator, non-housing costs are 20-25% less here than in bay area.
        
        Housing is, of course, the big difference.
        
        robc 9 years ago
        
        Home school is private, right?
        
        WTF 9 years ago
        
        Nicole has it right on this one.
        
        R C Dean 9 years ago
        
        I'm not so sure. They can't afford some of the amenities that salary would pull elsewhere, but they have decided (consciously or not) to buy living in Palo Alto rather than buying those amenities.
        
        Now, pay is higher in Palo Alto, I'm sure, than they could bring in elsewhere. But this is increasingly a national employment market, especially for anyone in the top quintile. I'm not seeing all that much difference in attorney pay, for example, across cities. When you get into rural areas, it drops off, but an attorney who can pull down $250K in San Francisco can probably pull down that much in any top 50 city.
    4. Idle Hands 9 years ago
      
      from what I hear about housing costs if you have kids and a stay at home husband/wife you probably are just scraping by at the lower end of that.
  4. Mike Laursen 9 years ago
    
    The reporter's source in this story is a SJW documentary filmmaker. Methinks it may not be totally factual.
  5. Rhywun 9 years ago
    
    It's not the community that I moved into 33 years ago,
    
    Bullshit. Palo Alto has been like that for a lot longer than 33 years.
  6. Trshmnstr, terror of the trash 9 years ago
    
    I can't wait to live out there this summer.
    
    /sarc
  7. Hyperbolical 9 years ago
    
    The plan would focus on building smaller, downtown units for people who live near transit and don't own cars, along with mixed-use retail and residential developments.
    
    This is the real purpose: incentive for "middle class" homeowners to move into these new developments where they will live in quasi-urban homes and ride trains.
    1. Rhywun 9 years ago
      
      In other words, shit that would happen anyway without any stupid regs preventing it.
  8. CE 9 years ago
    
    Government policies drive prices up. Government workers hardest hit.
7. Drake 9 years ago
  
  Here's Carl's Jr. reaction - the fully automated restaurant.
  
  http://www.businessinsider.com.....ion-2016-3
8. CE 9 years ago
  
  Pikers. Why not 25 bucks an hour? Geez.
MSimon 9 years ago

Don Trump's grandfather was a pimp.

http://classicalvalues.com/201.....n-blogger/
1. WTF 9 years ago
  
  I guess that's why Donald has a strong pimp-hand.
  1. EMD 9 years ago
    
    I think you meant "tiny pimp-hand."
2. SIV 9 years ago
  
  Fred Trump was the inspiration for
  1. SIV 9 years ago
    
    McCabe & Mrs. Miller
3. DJF 9 years ago
  
  """Don Trump grandfather was a pimp""""
  
  So he was an early libertarian businessman who supported peoples right to rent out their body for money.
  
  When will Reason Magazine announce their support of Trump for President because of his deep libertarian roots?
  1. SIV 9 years ago
    
    Never!
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

Don't cry for me...

Under heavy security, Obama touches down in Argentina in historic state visit

Obama's visit will be met with backlash from some Argentines. Thousands plan to protest the American leader's appearance on March 24, the 40th anniversary of a 1976 right-wing coup that had the tacit support of the Ford administration. But a March 2016 poll of 1,000 Buenos Aires respondents found that a majority (66%) sees Obama's visit as a positive change. Respondents say the visit will boost investment and foster reintegration in the world, according to the consultancy Ibar?metro in Buenos Aires.

A week before Obama's state visit, human rights organizations in Argentina applauded the U.S. decision to declassify military, intelligence and law enforcement records on the South American nation's "dirty war" ? the 1976-1983 government junta against left-wing guerrillas and suspected dissidents ? that the U.S. initially supported.
1. Tonio 9 years ago
  
  Get over it, Argentina.
  1. Zeb 9 years ago
    
    Seriously.
    
    Anyone see the Top Gear special in Argentina? That was some fucked up shit.
    1. KeithC 9 years ago
      
      Some gorgeous scenes before that, though. An altogether compelling episode.
      1. Zeb 9 years ago
        
        Yeah, I liked it a lot. But holy shit those Tierra Del Fuegoans need to get over it.
2. Lee G 9 years ago
  
  Respondents say the visit will boost investment
  
  Yeah, because Argentina has never screwed investors before. I bet they're just lining up to give them loans.
3. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
  
  OMG Everything he does is soooo historic!!!!
4. SugarFree 9 years ago
  
  Eva Michelle will like it there.
5. a better chipper 9 years ago
  
  Buenos Aires is a beautiful city. They borrow from a number of European countries for architectural influence (Opera Houses are stunning!), and their theaters go for the NYC vibe, but it all kind of works.
  
  The grey-black, cash economy is a hell of a deal too. My wife and I have never eaten better in our lives than we did in BA.
  
  When you leave the city and see how utterly pathetic existence is just outside the limits, well, that's another story.
Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper 9 years ago

Yet Trump still won the most delegates yesterday, picking up 58 from a win in Arizona, where Cruz placed second.

Way to bury the lede

What the fuck is wrong with you all lately? Trump got your tongue? Holy fuck - lighten up and get a grip.
1. Hamster of Doom 9 years ago
  
  You can't leave us alone for a second, Almanian. Goodness only knows what we'll get up to.
  
  How are you feeling? It's GOOD to see you posting.
2. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
  
  I am still voting Almanian/Cthulhu in the general election!
  1. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
    
    I've always been a Kodos man, myself.
    1. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
      
      You're such a Zelda.
nofold 9 years ago

http://www.nydailynews.com/ent.....-1.2574397

probably did the link wrong.
RIP phife. best fucking group of the 90s man god damnit.
1. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 9 years ago
  
  Looks like you did.
Libertarian 9 years ago

A couple days ago, Hillary was quoted at HandR for saying that we need to broaden our fight against ISIS. Now, after the Brussels attacks, she's criticizing Trump and Cruz for inciting fear. Ya gotta love her.
1. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
  
  It's very sexist of you to point out the inconsistencies in Hillary's statements. Hillary says whatever is politically convenient at that very second, even if it contradicts something she said just minutes ago. She's lying, you know she's lying, and she knows you know she's lying, but none of it matters anymore because it's her turn goddamn it.
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

Machete-wielding 'leprechaun' robs 3 Turkey Hill stores

According to court documents, Rodriguez was wearing a lime green wig, black sunglasses, a white bandana, black coat, black pants and orange and black shoes when he robbed the Manheim Township store.

"Rodriguez displayed the machete and also placed the end of the machete on two employees during the money transfer," the affidavit of probable cause states.

Rodriguez left the store with more than $500, but officers caught him on the 600 block of Fountain Avenue.
1. Tonio 9 years ago
  
  We need commonsense knife control.
  1. WTF 9 years ago
    
    We need to seal the border against Hispanic leprechauns.
  2. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
    
    That's not a knife.
2. WTF 9 years ago
  
  They caught him eating a box of Suerte Encantos.
  1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
    
    *narrows gaze*
3. Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer 9 years ago
  
  WE NEED MORE PICS.
  1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 9 years ago
    
    Someone has a leprechaun fetish...
    
    Were you the one who posted the pornhub link about hits for leprechaun pron going up for the holiday?
Zeb 9 years ago

It's better to regret something you have done than something you haven't done.
1. WTF 9 years ago
  
  I suppose that would depend on the specifics.
  1. Zeb 9 years ago
    
    By the way, if you see your mom this weekend, be sure and tell her SATAN, SATAN, SATAN!
  2. R C Dean 9 years ago
    
    "I really regret chopping all those little kids to pieces" v "I really regret not ordering the house special"?
    
    Yeah, I think its more case by case.
2. Lord Humungus 9 years ago
  
  Hitler?
3. Zeb 9 years ago
  
  For heaven's sake, no one knows the Butthole Surfers?
  
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYGoougMHSQ
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

How Real-Life Quidditch Has Become the World's Most Progressive Sport

To you and I, the average spectator, Quidditch is a fictional sport made up by everyone's fave rags-to-riches Brit author JK Rowling. It's a game played on broomsticks that exists purely within the pages of Harry Potter novels or as acted out by Tom Felton and the old Weasleys on screen. Except that it isn't. For a small group of people, it's a legitimate, real-life game not dissimilar to the hoops-and-stick fictional romp it's based on.

The fundamental difference is that the real-life players don't fly?instead, they run with a stick between their legs. Obviously. Don't be an idiot. The stick acts as a handicap in the same way that not running with the ball does in basketball, or not being able to pick up the ball does in soccer
1. Lee G 9 years ago
  
  In the International Quidditch Association's rulebook, there's a huge section dedicated to explaining preferred pronouns and the terminology surrounding gender identity. Take the "four maximum gender" rule. Each team is allowed to have a maximum of four players (not including the seeker) who identify as the same gender in active play on the field. As a new sport, it's literally founded on the idea of being a safe, inclusive space.
  
  So how do the refs keep track?
  1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    Can one switch gender mid-game?
    1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 9 years ago
      
      I suspect that 'gender-fluid' counts as a separate category.
      
      But that it requires you to actually switch genders at half time (maybe as part of the half-time show?).
      1. UnCivilServant 9 years ago
        
        "gender-fluid" sounds like an excretion that requires a biohazard label.
  2. Hamster of Doom 9 years ago
    
    Bullshit. That's not canon. Holyfield Harpies FTMFW.
  3. Citizen X 9 years ago
    
    So how do the refs keep track?
    
    Heavy psilocybin use?
    1. Just say Nikki 9 years ago
      
      Dude, I cannot be that active on mushrooms.
      1. Citizen X 9 years ago
        
        A friend of mine took mushrooms on the Outer Banks and then spent the whole night running around in the surf, setting off phosphorescent plankton. At least, he SAYS there was phosphorescent plankton.
        
        commodious spittoon 9 years ago
        
        POIDH
        
        Just say Nikki 9 years ago
        
        The most active I have gotten is probably making snow angels. But man, the last time, I was pretty much glued to the couch.
        
        Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 9 years ago
        
        He was likely running around in someone's sprinklers, with the automatic lights going on and off.
  4. Tonio 9 years ago
    
    Uh, the whole point of Quidditch, as depicted in Rowling's universe, is that it's a game played in three dimensions with floating/flying balls.
    1. robc 9 years ago
      
      Quidditch was creared by someone who dorsntvunderstand sports. The rules arent viable.
    2. robc 9 years ago
      
      Quidditch was creared by someone who dorsntvunderstand sports. The rules arent viable.
      1. EMD 9 years ago
        
        "dorsntvunderstand"
        
        None of us speak Norwegian around here.
    3. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 9 years ago
      
      with floating/flying balls
      
      Obviously, without any kind of athletic support.
  5. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
    
    Each team is allowed to have a maximum of four players (not including the seeker) who identify as the same gender in active play on the field.
    
    Umm...so couldn't a player just change his/her/its/xis/xer/xeir/wtf identity if the limit is reached? Is there a procedure for that, or would that violate xeir safe space?
2. Chipwooder 9 years ago
  
  Idiots running around holding a broom between their legs. That encapsulates modern America rather well.
  1. Libertarian 9 years ago
    
    Congratulations, it's been 45 minutes since your remark and no one is calling you an idiot. Whenever I've posted here about the infantilization of America as evidenced by adults dressing up as fantasy characters like 10 year olds on Halloween, I catch holy hell.
    1. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
      
      Some men like to wear diapers. Who are we to judge?
      1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 9 years ago
        
        Some men have wear diapers. You judgey judgemental person.
        
        commodious spittoon 9 years ago
        
        The first group is appropriating the culture of the second group. Literal shitlords.
        
        Trshmnstr, terror of the trash 9 years ago
        
        *alternating look of disgust and applause*
      2. Hank Phillips 9 years ago
        
        Well... since a bunch of them adult diaper-wearers are on the Supreme Court, they're more likely to be judging us.
    2. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
      
      Some people like to dress up in animal costumes and go to conventions to meet like-minded adults to engage in consensual activities. Stop being so judgmental!
    3. Chipwooder 9 years ago
      
      Makes me want to do series of vigorous Big Ern fist pumps.
    4. EMD 9 years ago
      
      Have you seen some of the chick cosplay?
3. Zeb 9 years ago
  
  The lack of magical flying balls would also seem to be a pretty significant difference.
  1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    Lol. How does the seeker even work for this?
    1. Lord Humungus 9 years ago
      
      drones?
      1. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
        
        Obama approves.
        
        Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 9 years ago
        
        The FAA does not.
        
        Drones should only be used to kill people. Otherwise, you need a license.
    2. tarran 9 years ago
      
      The snitch isn't a magical ball. It's a ball handing from the belt of a human being. Basically, the guy runs around with the Seekers in hot pursuit. He can pretty much do anything he wants to evade capture short of aggravated battery.
      1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
        
        The game should be over pretty quickly.
      2. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
        
        But the snitch was supposed to be difficult to find.
        
        tarran 9 years ago
        
        The guy can go anywhere he wants, on or off the field. One famous match the guy jumped into a car and drove off!
        
        Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
        
        Unless he's the size of a tiny golden ball and can fly, then he's doing it wrong.
        
        Also, I think you may need to look up what "famous" means....
  2. BigT 9 years ago
    
    lack of magical flying balls
    
    You missed this part:
    
    Each team is allowed to have a maximum of four players (not including the seeker) who identify as the same gender in active play on the field.
    1. R C Dean 9 years ago
      
      Some of the balls may be imaginary, but magical?
4. Overt 9 years ago
  
  I liked the HP Books, but always found the game of Quidditch to be the type of game a sports-hating woman to come up with in about 10 minutes of quick thought.
  
  The pace of the game is ridiculously variable and the scoring is largely worthless- in 95% of games it comes down to who catches the snitch. It always struck me as a completely unbelievable game- in a world filled with magic.
  
  Did they change up the rules so that the game is a little more competitive and less pointless?
  1. Lord Humungus 9 years ago
    
    While reading the books I generally skimmed through the Quidditch matches just making sure I didn't miss any important plot point,
  2. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    Yea the scoring was not really relevant.
  3. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    Also, who in their right mind would catch the snitch if they were down more than what snitch was worth?
    1. Hamster of Doom 9 years ago
      
      Viktor Krum?
      1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
        
        Oh yea that was who it was in the book. It was the world cup and he caught the snitch such that they then lost. Makes no sense
        
        Hamster of Doom 9 years ago
        
        I... have no idea how to respond. Krum catching the Snitch when Bulgaria was down was explained in the book. Repeating it seems silly, as either you've read it already and still don't understand or you haven't read the book, in which case the entire discussion's value is solely in that we are not discussing presidential candidates.
        
        Also, Snape kills Dumbledore.
        
        UnCivilServant 9 years ago
        
        At lot more characters in that series needed to die, preferrably painfully.
        
        Tornado16nb 9 years ago
        
        Haha sorry i forget. But didn't one of the Weasley's predict that to happen before hand? Was krum's team really terrible or something that he figured to just get it over with? I wouldn't think so since they were in the world cup
  4. tarran 9 years ago
    
    Yes they did.
    
    The snitch is worth a *lot* less - only 30 points - but it does bring the game to a close.
    
    The interplay between the snitch, the blodgers and the quaffle actually make for an interesting game. The blodgers can be used defensively (to shut down opposing offense) or offensively (to go after opposing defense). And the team that is behind will try to prevent the capture of the snitch to give them a chance at a comeback.
    
    And the brooms between the legs, though silly looking, actually slow people down so that you don't get the crippling injuries that would happen if people were running flat out while playing the game.
    1. Lord Humungus 9 years ago
      
      someone's a fan... *eyes tarran suspiciously*
      1. tarran 9 years ago
        
        My daughter....
        
        Out of love for her, I think I've watched about 3 hours of terribly filmed youtube videos, while she sat on my lap and rhapsodized about starting her own team with her friends.
        
        I will admit, though, that towards the end, I started getting into it. Go Terps!
        
        commodious spittoon 9 years ago
        
        Turps?
    2. SugarFree 9 years ago
      
      The interplay between the snitch, the blodgers and the quaffle
      
      "I'm going to make up some almost dirty words and put them in my kid's book."
      
      But seriously, those sound like Agile Cyborg and I wrote a porn script together.
      1. WTF 9 years ago
        
        Agile Cyborg and I wrote a porn script together.
        
        Go on....
        
        SugarFree 9 years ago
        
        We're waiting on the ketamine shipment.
        
        Citizen X 9 years ago
        
        So you're good on the rubber hoses and the trannies? I'll tell my goat guy never mind.
    3. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
      
      Just play rugby, for God's sake!
      1. jarflax 9 years ago
        
        Rugby is not a safe space.
        
        Swiss Servator 9 years ago
        
        *looks at scars, and finger and thumb that won't bend that well. Contemplates arthritis in right knee*
        
        True.
      2. jesse.in.mb 9 years ago
        
        Just play rugby, for God's sake!
        
        Yes. America needs more rugby players.
        
        Timon 19 9 years ago
        
        You have the hots for Todd Clever and his new beardo look, don't you?
    4. BigT 9 years ago
      
      the brooms between the legs, though silly looking, actually slow people down so that you don't get the crippling injuries
      
      Presumably they don't get injuries because they are wearing cups. Otherwise, ouch!!
  5. KDN 9 years ago
    
    I only watched the movies but I got the exact same impression. What a worthless event. The entire point of it is to show how awesome Harry Potter is.
5. waffles 9 years ago
  
  A former colleague of mine was really into quidditch at his alma mater. His team went to an intercollegiate tournament where one of the schools fielded their football team. Apparently it was a glorious spectacle of violent nerd-bashing before they were kicked out of the event.
  1. KDN 9 years ago
    
    Sounds like every single Ultimate Frisbee game in which I've ever participated.
    
    "No fair bro, I wanted to catch that."
    1. Zeb 9 years ago
      
      Really? All my experience with that game has been pretty ruthless.
  2. Rhywun 9 years ago
    
    I am sorry but anyone over the age of 15 or so and still pursuing this needs help before they grow up into furries or something.
    1. Trshmnstr, terror of the trash 9 years ago
      
      You really think any of them are going to be having sex?
      1. R C Dean 9 years ago
        
        Dude, the balls are magical! How can that not end in sweaty, sweaty nerd sex?
MSimon 9 years ago

Libertarians For Trump

The common theme is that the elite doesn't like him and the libertarians don't like the elite.

Gillespie gets a mention.

And this: http://classicalvalues.com/201.....n-blogger/
1. Citizen X 9 years ago
  
  The common theme is that the elite doesn't like him and the libertarians don't like the elite.
  
  You'd think no one would know better than libertarians that the enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend.
  
  More often, the enemy of my enemy is just someone who makes a lot of enemies.
  1. MSimon 9 years ago
    
    Well of course. There is always Bush endorsed Cruz who will lose against Hillary.
    
    http://classicalvalues.com/201.....n-blogger/
    
    Make no mistake ?Hillary is your next Master in Office. NOTHING will stop that from happening. It's been a long time coming, and of course the GOP want to have insurance for the Clinton/Bush Globalist Agenda that's been written into the future history books since before Orwell wrote 1984, so they have their little bobbleheads standing on the sidelines in all directions from Cruz to Rubio to Kasich to Romney ?and even Condeleezza Rice is being thrown in for possible good measure (they tried to sell brother Jeb but you know how that went.) When Hillary takes the reigns it won't be Communism or a Soft Socialism ?it will be Slave vs. Master World Government and the monsters who have been controlling the strings for quite some time will be eating your children.
    1. Citizen X 9 years ago
      
      Agorism is looking better and better.
    2. CatoTheChipper 9 years ago
      
      Trump is a craps shoot. Odds are you're going to lose on any given issue. Clinton is a craps shoot with loaded dice ... and they're loaded to come up with snake-eyes on every single issue ... except abortion, of course, because that's a right to which she is firmly committed.
    3. R C Dean 9 years ago
      
      Make no mistake ?Hillary is your next Master in Office. NOTHING will stop that from happening.
      
      I still can't give her better than 50/50 odds. Against anyone. She is a nearly perfectly self-defeating candidate.
  2. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
    
    You'd think no one would know better than libertarians that the enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend.
    
    Agreed. Typically, for libertarians, the enemy of my enemy is also my enemy.
    
    See, for example, progs vs. SoCons in the gay-rights disputes; or Republicans vs. progs in relation to anything involving Obamacare. Or, really, any major issue for the past 75+ years.
2. Just say Nikki 9 years ago
  
  and the libertarians don't like the elite
  
  If this is true at all, it is true if "elite" refers to "cronies." Why would I have a problem with people who had basic manners? Because that's who hates Trump.
  1. MSimon 9 years ago
    
    Yes. My intention was cronies. Did you see the women on the view fawning over Trump - for a while.
    
    http://classicalvalues.com/201.....eel-safer/
    1. Tonio 9 years ago
      
      Or Crones...
      1. Citizen X 9 years ago
        
        +1 Dosh Khaleen
  2. AlmightyJB 9 years ago
    
    To be fair, we don't like anyone.
3. SIV 9 years ago
  
  Wow! Walter Block endorses Trump while Jeffrey Tucker says supporting Trump is like burning a cross.
  1. Bob Meyer 9 years ago
    
    I guess that Walter Block hasn't changed much in the last 45 years. I met him briefly in Murray Rothbard's apartment back around 1970. I seem to remember that he was hot on the idea of forming an alliance with the Black Panthers.
    
    Some libertarians seemed to believe that chaos was the road to freedom. The order that spontaneously emerges may not be better than what existed before. Trump is an emergent phenomenon and he is no improvement over Bushes or Romneys.
    1. SIV 9 years ago
      
      The order that spontaneously emerges may be better than what existed before. Roll the dice!
      1. R C Dean 9 years ago
        
        Exactly. At some point, the current trend is so bad that basically taking a shot in the dark is a better bet. Whether we are there yet or not, who knows?
  2. Chipwooder 9 years ago
    
    Jeffrey Tucker is letting an understandable distaste for Donald Trump make him sound like a goddamned idiot.
    1. SIV 9 years ago
      
      You're far too charitable
    2. Hank Phillips 9 years ago
      
      I'd never vote for a repuglican, but anyone they hate and voters like can't be all bad in my book. It's good practice for the day they finally realize LIB does not stand for "libberal beer-legalizing FDR supporter"
Princess Trigger 9 years ago

New GOP convention rule: Only Mormons will be allowed on the convention floor until we figure out what's going on.
1. WTF 9 years ago
  
  "The Mormons, they're polygamists, they wear magic underwear, they hoard food, and some of them, I assume, are good people."
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

Economic and racial anxiety: Two separate forces driving support for Donald Trump

Among many other topics, respondents were asked whether they were struggling economically ? or whether they were comfortable and moving up. They were also asked whether they thought it was more of a problem that African Americans and Latinos are "losing out because of preferences for whites" or whether whites are "losing out because of preferences for blacks and Hispanics." The survey asked this question in order to gauge the sentiment that racial and ethnic groups don't just feel they are facing difficulties in general, but that those losses are being caused by other group's gains.

The following chart summarizes results from Republicans and Republican-leaning independent registered voters. Trump had the support of 34 percent of Republican-leaning voters overall. But he did particularly well among people who said they are struggling economically, with 40 percent of their support, and even better ? 43 percent ?among people who said that whites are losing out.
1. WTF 9 years ago
  
  They were also asked whether they thought it was more of a problem that African Americans and Latinos are "losing out because of preferences for whites" or whether whites are "losing out because of preferences for blacks and Hispanics."
  
  That's an odd question, since there are no government-mandated preferences for whites, but there are for minorities. Yet it appears to try to draw an equivalence in the mind of the respondent.
  1. Irish ?s Lauren Southern 9 years ago
    
    The left's argument would be that there's de facto preferences for white workers caused by racism and that affirmative action is a way of combating that racism.
    
    Of course, that doesn't explain why affirmative action has the effect of screwing over Asians, but that's none of my business.
    1. WTF 9 years ago
      
      The left's argument would be that there's de facto preferences for white workers caused by racism
      
      Assertion without evidence. Of course, that's par for the course.
      1. Just say Nikki 9 years ago
        
        It's a survey. Why would they give you evidence when they're trying to elicit what you already think?
        
        WTF 9 years ago
        
        I was referring to the left's argument as noted by Irish. I would have thought that was obvious, since that is what I quoted.
        
        R C Dean 9 years ago
        
        Leading questions are not unheard of in polling.
        
        Its a standard polling technique, in fact, to ask someone about X, then tell them something about X, and ask if that changes their views.
        
        "Do you think its more of a problem that African Americans and Latinos are "losing out because of preferences for whites" or that whites are "losing out because of preferences for blacks and Hispanics."
        
        "If I told you that there are government-mandated preferences for African Americans and Latinos, but no government-mandated preferences for whites, would that change your answer?"
Aloysious 9 years ago

S.Korea and US allies face 'miserable end', says N.Korea

North Korea threatened a "miserable end" for South Korea's president and her American allies on Wednesday, in its latest colourfully worded attack.

Pyongyang declared it would wage a "retaliatory battle of justice" against Park Geun-Hye, with its artillery units standing ready to turn her office into a "sea of flames and ashes".

"What the DPRK warns is not hot air. It will be clearly proved by the miserable end the US and the Park group will meet while going reckless," said the Committee for the Peaceful Reunification of Korea (CPRK), using the formal name for North Korea.

The latest volley comes as Seoul and ally Washington stage their annual Key Resolve and Foal Eagle military drills, which this year are the largest ever, in the wake of a recent North Korean nuclear test and long-range rocket launch.
1. tarran 9 years ago
  
  I just love the fact that the guys threatening nuclear fire call themselves the Committee for the Peaceful Reunification of Korea.
  
  They must mean it in the Roman sense.
  1. Aloysious 9 years ago
    
    I had the same thought. I guess their intentions are [not] good?
2. EMD 9 years ago
  
  Just get on with it, you pricks!
  
  Fucking mouth-running no shows.
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

Working from home today... and watching The Sword & The Sorcerer in the background.

So cheesy... so shooting tri-sword...
1. Lee G 9 years ago
  
  You should follow it up with Fire and Ice
  1. Lord Humungus 9 years ago
    
    Good idea - I've got that somewhere in my collection of 80s movies
  2. Aloysious 9 years ago
    
    +1 Frank Frazetta
  3. Je suis Woodchipper 9 years ago
    
    i think you can stream that for free off youtube.
DEG 9 years ago

Exploring cenotes

Short video which is not auto-play.
1. Ken Shultz 9 years ago
  
  I've explored a number of cenotes.
  
  The underwater part is probably the least interesting part.
  
  There are always Mayan ruins somewhere nearby; at one, howler monkeys climbed down the tree roots to watch us swim; swallows build nests in the mouth of the cave; if you want to see something amazing under water, the Caribbean is right around the bend.
  
  I went to one near the coast. Had to take a jungle trail past hundreds of wild flamingos, and the jungle was filled with breeding butterflies. They covered the trail and fluttered through the air around us--thousands and thousands of them.
  
  If you can't get lucky after taking a girl on an adventure like that, you're so lost in the friend zone, you ain't never getting out.
DEG 9 years ago

World's largest model train set

Short video which is not auto-play.
1. The Last American Hero 9 years ago
  
  I thought it was the one Moonbeam is building in CA
2. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
  
  Decent.
DEG 9 years ago

Oops

A truckload of Easter candy spilled out onto the highway following a two-vehicle accident on Route 100 Tuesday morning.

Douglass Township police responded to the scene at Route 100 North and County Line Road around 8 a.m. Tuesday after a 2012 Honda Odyssey collided with a 2000 Isuzu box truck carrying Easter candy, causing the truck to dump its contents on to the road.
1. Juvenile Bluster 9 years ago
  
  Free chocolate!
2. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
  
  First you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women!
3. CE 9 years ago
  
  a 2012 Honda Odyssey collided with a 2000 Isuzu box truck carrying Easter candy, causing the truck to dump its contents on to the road.
  
  Sounds like a euphemism for something.
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

Ryan: 'Disheartening' politics risks distrust of government

"Looking around at what's taking place in politics today, it is easy to get disheartened," Ryan says in excerpts released by his office ahead of a Wednesday speech. "How many of you find yourself just shaking your head at what you see from both sides?"

Ryan said that while skepticism is beneficial, "When people distrust politics, they come to distrust institutions. They lose faith in their government, and the future, too. We can acknowledge this. But we can't accept it. And we can't enable it either."
1. WTF 9 years ago
  
  Ryan said that while skepticism is beneficial, "When people distrust politics, they come to distrust institutions. They lose faith in their government
  
  I'm not really seeing the downside, here.
  1. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
    
    This
  2. Libertarian 9 years ago
    
    Faith: belief without evidence.
Aloysious 9 years ago

80-year-old pot dealer gets 10 years after colorful history

BOSTON (AP) ? An 80-year-old man who ran a sprawling marijuana-dealing operation that covered several states, with records going back to 1992, was sentenced to 10 years in prison.

Marshall Dion pleaded guilty last year to drug and money-laundering charges, and Tuesday's sentencing in Massachusetts was the latest chapter in a long, colorful history with law enforcement.

In 1985, he crashed a single-engine plane he was piloting in Kenosha County, Wisconsin, breaking both his ankles. When sheriff's deputies arrived, he was crawling along a muddy field as money floated in the air. The government was allowed to keep nearly $112,000 in cash recovered from the crash scene after a judge found it was likely drug proceeds, but Dion was not charged criminally.
1. Libertarian 9 years ago
  
  Well, at least he didn't get a life sentence.
  1. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
    
    *winces*
2. R C Dean 9 years ago
  
  records going back to 1992
  
  If you are keeping records of your criminal operation, yer doin' it wrong.
3. CE 9 years ago
  
  The government is supposed to break your leg and offer you a crutch, not just rob you after you break your own ankles.
4. Hank Phillips 9 years ago
  
  So asset forfeiture took off with a harmless old man's retirement savings? Looting is good?
SugarFree 9 years ago

"No leader, especially a religious leader, should have the right to question another man's religion or faith."

-Trump, Feb. 12

"I have many friends that live in Salt Lake City ? and by the way, Mitt Romney is not one of them. Are you sure he's a Mormon? Are we sure?"

-Trump, March 20

Trump forgets nothing Utah. Nothing. Your desert will burn.
1. Just say Nikki 9 years ago
  
  Aw, don't leave off the ones about how Cruz can't be an evangelical because he's brownish!
  1. MSimon 9 years ago
    
    Cruz is a Domionist.
    
    http://classicalvalues.com/201.....n-blogger/
    1. Tonio 9 years ago
      
      Well, at least he's not an onion domist or a dominionist.
      1. MSimon 9 years ago
        
        Well his religion is anti-Constitution. If he still follows it. Which he claims he does.
        
        Tonio 9 years ago
        
        No argument from me on that.
      2. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
        
        Dominoist?
        
        Their pizza is only mediocre.
2. Libertarian 9 years ago
  
  "No leader, especially a religious leader, should have the right to question another man's religion or faith."
  
  Um, Donald? I think that's actually in the job description.
3. CatoTheChipper 9 years ago
  
  After this, Trump will never build a casino in Utah. That'll show them!
Notorious UGCC 9 years ago

I'm going to skip ahead a day and link this from the Holy Thursday service.
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

The Lincoln Navigator Concept is a massive, luxurious land yacht

Lincoln has built large screens for everyone (except the driver) to allow passengers to play games against each other in the car. The company said it could envision everyone's screens connecting to different smartphones or tablets, or for one tablet to play a movie to everyone, for example. Or for each screen to have its own implementation of CarPlay.

There's a clever intercom system to make it easier for folks in the third row to converse normally with people in the front. There's even a video chat system that allows riders in the back to see the driver when they're talking, which might be useful for nervous children who want to see Mom.

Who knows how much of this will make it to the final car, but Lincoln is certainly thinking of the future.

Don't expect the amazing (and amazingly silly) Tesla Model X-style doors to make it to production. Galhotra said there were never plans to bring it to fruition, but instead it's just there to make it easier to see the proposed interior.
1. Overt 9 years ago
  
  I'd been waiting for the new navigator for like 5 years. I finally gave up and bought the suburban a year back. We loved our Flex and the navigator looks to be taking a lot of queues from that design. Bummer that it has taken them 7 years to get around to it.
2. EMD 9 years ago
  
  1974 Chrysler New Yorkers take offense to the headline description.
Aloysious 9 years ago

Not a happy hour as beer, chips spill onto Florida highway

MELBOURNE, Fla. (AP) ? It wasn't a happy hour for some central Florida drivers when trucks carrying Busch beer and Frito Lay chips collided, spilling them both along Interstate 95.

The crash happened early Wednesday morning near Melbourne.

Florida Highway Patrol spokeswoman Kim Montes said in statement that Zachary Basinger of Melbourne had stopped his Frito Lay box truck onto the right shoulder.

Roberto Ferrer Rodriguez of Miami told troopers he was trying to move his beer truck into the center lane but saw another vehicle and swerved back into the right lane. His truck struck the chips truck.

The Frito Lay truck overturned. The beer and chips spilled onto the highway. Traffic backed up as troopers closed the road while clearing the debris.

Rodriguez was ticketed for failing to maintain a single lane.
1. Libertarian 9 years ago
  
  Dammit. We get Busch on our Florida roads while Pennsylvania gets Easter candy.
2. EMD 9 years ago
  
  Traffic backed up as troopers closed the road while clearing the debris.
  
  Mmmm, delicious debris.
3. Glide 9 years ago
  
  I assume this is viral marketing for Beer Chips, new from Frito-Lay!
Old Man With Candy 9 years ago

So, the news stories have been unclear- were the suicide bomber brothers in Brussels Belgian born and raised or were they recent immigrants?
1. Juvenile Bluster 9 years ago
  
  According to the Interpol profile of one of the brothers, Belgian-born.
  1. Old Man With Candy 9 years ago
    
    OK, so all the connection to "refugees" and "immigrants" is, as I suspected, total bullshit.
    1. Juvenile Bluster 9 years ago
      
      Well, we don't know about the others involved, because we don't know their identities.
      1. WTF 9 years ago
        
        Yeah, I believe at least some of the ones involved in the Paris attacks were refugees and immigrants.
    2. Tonio 9 years ago
      
      Perhaps native-born, but clearly not assimilated. There is no reliable litmus test for assimilation.
      1. robc 9 years ago
        
        Suicide bombing your birth country would seem to be a negative litmus test.
        
        Tonio 9 years ago
        
        True, but not a useful one.
        
        Swiss Servator 9 years ago
        
        VERY limited application!
        
        CatoTheChipper 9 years ago
        
        A litmus test is in the category of a non-destructive test.
        
        A suicide bombing test for assimilation is, unfortunately, a destructive test.
      2. Old Man With Candy 9 years ago
        
        Perhaps native-born, but clearly not assimilated.
        
        Well, that's been my contention about why this is a far greater European problem than an American problem. We are by nature an assimilationist society, Europe's various countries have in common that they are not.
        
        Tonio 9 years ago
        
        We are by nature an assimilationist society
        
        ^This.
        
        robc 9 years ago
        
        Relative to Europe, sure. But it still takes about 3 generations in msny cases.
        
        CatoTheChipper 9 years ago
        
        Assimilation may take two or three generations, but the sort of immigrants that the US has traditionally attracted usually wanted to assimilate to a very large degree, and that makes all the difference. Unfortunately, the current doctrine of multiculturalism seeks to prevent assimilation by celebrating diversity, creating new varieties of victim categories, and blathering about cultural appropriation and the like.
        
        Immigrants to Europe are largely disgruntled inhabitants of former colonies who arrive with a chip on their shoulder. Many seek the generous welfare benefits of democratic socialism and have absolutely no intention of assimilating. Unfortunately, the US has been accelerating it trip on the road to democratic socialism and beyond.
        
        JD the elder 9 years ago
        
        I wish I could find the source now, but I read the other day that 25% of French citizens polled said that being Jewish was not compatible with being French. Twenty-five percent! And this for a minority that they've had for hundreds of years and that has historically been very well integrated. The problem with European states is that they've historically been ethnic nation-states, so being "French" means not just having citizenship in the French republic, but being of a particular ethnicity; the US has never been quite like that.
    3. R C Dean 9 years ago
      
      OK, so all the connection to "refugees" and "immigrants" is, as I suspected, total bullshit.
      
      I don't see how persistent attacks from unassimilated second and third generation descendants of immigrants renders concerns about immigration irrelevant.
2. SugarFree 9 years ago
  
  Which one fits your prejudices better?
  1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
    
    That they would be dirty Walloons, not noble Flemish!!!!!!!!!!
    
    /old family prejudice
3. tarran 9 years ago
  
  Does it matter?
  
  Either way, you have a vast population containing mostly good guys, but with a handful of very bad guys.
  1. Old Man With Candy 9 years ago
    
    Does it matter?
    
    Yes, it very much does. Defining a problem is necessary before discussing solutions.
    1. Tonio 9 years ago
      
      ^This. The real issue is assimilation, not citizenship.
      1. robc 9 years ago
        
        Free movement doesnt require easy citizenship.
  2. Tonio 9 years ago
    
    Or mostly neutral people with a few bad and good guys of varying degree.
    1. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
      
      Chaotic Neutral?
      
      /rolls 1d20
  3. Free Society 9 years ago
    
    Either way, you have a vast population containing mostly good guys, but with a handful of very bad guys.
    
    42% of young Muslims in France believe suicide bombings are justified (35% overall). http://www.pewresearch.org/fil.....df#page=60
    
    A great many of the good guys offer material and moral support to the handful of very bad guys. I wonder if any of those good guys might be future very bad guys themselves.
  4. ant1sthenes 9 years ago
    
    Not really, more like you have a lot of bad guys, but a handful are very dangerous. The guy they just caught wasn't living in abandoned subway tunnels or something, he was able to go about his business unmolested because he lived among people who were like-minded enough to tolerate him, even if they were too personally risk-averse enough to follow in his footsteps.
    
    It's like the shitty racist town where all the white people know who's doing the lynching and bombings, and don't feel inclined to do anything about it because those uppity niggers were just looking for trouble.
Rhywun 9 years ago

Donald Trump suffered a major blow in Utah

I'm sure Donald Trump wrote off Utah a year and a half ago.
1. Free Society 9 years ago
  
  Utah being the only place where the Romney speech had a net negative impact on Trump's prospects.
Aloysious 9 years ago

WASHINGTON (AP) ? The Department of Veterans Affairs is suspending the head of the Veterans Benefits Administration for allowing two lower-ranking officials to manipulate the agency's hiring system for their own gain.

Deputy VA Secretary Sloan Gibson says acting VBA chief Danny Pummill will be suspended without pay for 15 days for his role in a relocation scam that has roiled the agency for months.

Pummill failed to exercise proper oversight as Kimberly Graves and Diana Rubens forced lower-ranking managers to accept job transfers and then stepped into the vacant positions themselves, keeping their senior-level pay while reducing their responsibilities, Gibson said Tuesday.

Pummill is one of VA's five highest-ranking officials and leads VBA's employees across 56 regional offices nationwide that provide compensation and pension benefits, life insurance, home loans and other services to millions of veterans.

Under VA rules, Pummill can appeal his suspension to an independent arbiter.

Pummill was the VBA's deputy chief when Rubens and Graves implemented the job relocations, which put both of them closer to their families. Pummill replaced former VBA chief Allison Hickey, who retired as allegations against Rubens and Graves were made public..
1. Aloysious 9 years ago
  
  Drat
2. Tornado16nb 9 years ago
  
  Wow. I am not shocked. Any other company he would be fired.
3. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
  
  "to care for him who shall have borne the battle and for his widow and his orphan"
4. creech 9 years ago
  
  So, what are the odds Pummill is screwing either Rubens or Graves (or both)?
5. EMD 9 years ago
  
  Burn the VA to the ground. Ugh.
Juvenile Bluster 9 years ago

Seattle's man in a tree is still up there.
1. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
  
  He's mostly been cursing, but a few minutes ago yelled: "How much taxpayer money are you wasting? It's not an emergency!"
  
  Which one of you nutters is up a tree right now?
2. EMD 9 years ago
  
  This man is a hero.
Swiss Servator 9 years ago

Incoming anti-consultant and IT worker rant...

At first your restroom antics were kind of funny - like the Ukrainian Toilet Shouter (enter stall and begin yelling on Bluetooth..."TAK, TAK!"). But then your overwhelming numbers of portly, middle aged, shit-filled men, all bursting forth from the stairwells and crashing into our floor's single Men's room got to be a hassle. And the last straw - the 7 flush, leave the toilet fouled and clogged people....WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU PEOPLE RAISED? A CAVE? I get the folks that come from places that don't have flush toilets - but people from the Chicago area should NOT confuse toilets with Footwashers, automatic potato cleaners or the like. DO WE NEED TO PUT A GODDAMNED 'HOW TO USE THE CRAPPER" MANUAL BY EACH STALL?

GAH!!!!!!
1. SugarFree 9 years ago
  
  It might just be IT guys. There are only four of them in our building and I can never go in the bathroom without one of them coming in or leaving or already in there grunting like a hog rolling in mud.
  
  Ruffage, people! You need to eat vegetables!
  1. MSimon 9 years ago
    
    Ruff. Ruff.
  2. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
    
    Dang - that was one of them this morning - sounded like the death throes of a wildebeest.
  3. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
    
    At least they're not unisex.
2. Free Society 9 years ago
  
  Sounds like everyone in your office drank a lot of coffee this morning. Dark roast?
3. straffinrun 9 years ago
  
  Teach them the Borat method.
4. Aloysious 9 years ago
  
  ... automatic potato cleaners...
  
  I just lost it. Thanks a lot.
5. Tonio 9 years ago
  
  Sorry, bro.
6. Citizen X 9 years ago
  
  My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Free Society 9 years ago

Georgia is moving to make solicitation of prostitution a felony.

You mean solicitation of human trafficking victims?
1. Rhywun 9 years ago
  
  I love how the story to the right reads "Atlanta already losing convention business due to religious freedom bill". Yeah, that's why they're losing convention business.
  1. Free Society 9 years ago
    
    Millions if not billions of gay people are being shut out of the economy and forced to sit at the back of the bus because of that law!
    1. Rhywun 9 years ago
      
      Way to ruin my joke 🙁
      1. Free Society 9 years ago
        
        I'm.....sorry?
        
        Rhywun 9 years ago
        
        I am positing that they're really losing convention business because of the crackdown on prostitution.
        
        Free Society 9 years ago
        
        Oh... I read "religious freedom law" and I think about teh oppressed gayz. My apologies.
        
        straffinrun 9 years ago
        
        Use a link.
Lord Humungus 9 years ago

Recycle, reuse...

Venezuela Is Running Low on Condoms, Birth Control, and Shampoo

But if you're really desperate for a condom or a pill and you can afford some crazy prices, you can usually find one. In Venezuela, we have two prices for everything?tires, milk, toothpaste, toilet paper, contraceptive pills, DirecTV, and plane tickets?due to the supply never being enough for the demand. There is the official price and the black market price. For example, if you can find a bottle of shampoo in the shop, and you're willing and able to wait in line for hours for it, the official price will be around $12.50. On the black market, you'll always find something, but it'll be around $315. If you have a dealer's phone number, that helps. A dealer can help you find almost anything, basically. If you don't have that, you'll find black market options on Facebook, Instagram, and sites like MercadoLibre?some accounts even provide 24 hour assistance, like a delivery service.

After a day of scouring 12 pharmacies to find condoms, I couldn't find any. The three above, I bummed off a few friends who had some condoms saved?they're the closest thing to protection I could find and afford in Venezuela. The condoms were 500 Bol?var a piece?about $79?and on the black market, you'd pay ten times more.
1. lap83 9 years ago
  
  Who needs 23 types of birth control when children are starving? Hmm, wait...
2. Aloysious 9 years ago
  
  There are so many life lessons contained in that short article. Seriously.
  1. WTF 9 years ago
    
    Which would be completely lost on the Bern victims.
    1. CatoTheChipper 9 years ago
      
      The false consciousness of libertarians and other neo-liberals blinds them from that fact that US foreign policy has launched full-scale economic war against Bolivarian socialism. The capitalists have conspired to cut the price of oil, engineered a foreign exchange crisis for Venezuela, and supported reactionary political elements throughout the country. Bolivarian socialism is the genuine expression of the Venezuelan working class. It was fully successful until the norteamericano capitalists effected their evil plan.
3. Irish ?s Lauren Southern 9 years ago
  
  "The Chavista is also a condom, but it comes with its own special story. It was produced by the Chinese government to give to the people of Venezuela, as a solution to the shortage of imported condoms."
  
  If there's one thing I'd definitely trust to avoid pregnancy, it's a condom produced by the Chinese and named after Hugo Chavez.
  1. Free Society 9 years ago
    
    Who wouldn't want to fill a Chavista with their jizz?
4. BigT 9 years ago
  
  So, let's see. I fill my suitcase with condoms before I go to Caracas, hoping to make a killing.
  
  Mrs BigT opens said suitcase.
  
  The killing ensues.
  1. Libertarian 9 years ago
    
    If I left for Caracas with a suitcase full of condoms, my wife would have a couple questions for me. But cool story -- good luck!
  2. Swiss Servator 9 years ago
    
    *offers up prayers for the departed soul of BigT*
  3. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
    
    And then they're confiscated in customs.
    
    It's like you don't even third-world kleptocracy.
5. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
  
  In Venezuela, we have two prices for everything?tires, milk, toothpaste, toilet paper, contraceptive pills, DirecTV, and plane tickets
  
  Man, supermarkets there sound really boring.
  1. R C Dean 9 years ago
    
    What are the two prices? More than you can afford, and Way more than you can afford?
Sevo 9 years ago

Fixing a problem that doesn't exist, CA example No. 2,997,523

"Food waste is target of legislation on expiration labels"
[...]
"As a result, consumers regularly throw away expired, yet usually safe, food."
(claim; no info)
"That's why Mary Risley, founder of Food Runners, regularly goes to supermarkets to pick up products past their expiration date to donate to over 300 group homes, recovery centers, food banks and soup kitchens. The list of donated foods includes vacuum-packed meats, milk, produce and breads.
"We accept all of it," she said."
http://www.sfgate.com/food/art.....975097.php

Every so often, we work in a food-for-the-poor distribution center, packing foods the grocery stores have 'wasted' by giving them to the center.
Chiu's 'nose under the tent' is going to screw up charity food orgs statewide.
Sevo 9 years ago

New way to cherry pick data for political gain:

"Pay gap study: Women earn less than men even with same credentials"
http://www.sfgate.com/business.....974381.php

"Credentials" not defined, but look at the name of the outfit doing the study:
"...job-ratings site Glassdoor..."
1. WTF 9 years ago
  
  Credentials: four year degree in grievance studies = four year degree in chemical engineering. Hey, they're both four year college degrees!
2. EMD 9 years ago
  
  Glassdoor's data mining is hilarious. I have a job search for "creative director" that turns up everything from sous chef to daycare administrator.
Stormy Dragon 9 years ago

Donald Trump suffered a major blow in Utah, where Sen. Ted Cruz earned 71 percent of the primary vote, John Kasich 16 percent, and Trump just 14 percent.

Coming into last night, Trump needed to secure 54% of the remaining delegates to win the nomination outright, and he got 59% of the delegates available yesterday. Reason describes this as "a major blow".
1. SIV 9 years ago
  
  It's the innumerate affirmative action hire. Whaddya expect?
2. robc 9 years ago
  
  ???
  
  70 of 139 is what I see. That is 50.4%
  60 to Cruz. 9 to uncommitted from American Samoa.
  1. Stormy Dragon 9 years ago
    
    Utah only has 40 delegates.
    1. robc 9 years ago
      
      He got 20 from Idaho, Trump got 12.
      1. Stormy Dragon 9 years ago
        
        Idaho's GOP primary was March 8
  2. Stormy Dragon 9 years ago
    
    And Arizona only has 58. Where are you getting your numbers from?
    1. robc 9 years ago
      
      Idaho is still in America.
      1. Stormy Dragon 9 years ago
        
        And March 8 is still not yesterday.
      2. robc 9 years ago
        
        My bad, Idaho was earlier. There was talk about it being Mormon primaries, so I lumped Idaho in.
        
        Your numbers are right, depending on if you counted American Samoa or not.
  3. CE 9 years ago
    
    You know who got his law degree from American Samoa?
Macroaggression 9 years ago

OT: Can someone tell me when "resiliency" and "competency" replaced "resilience" and "competence"? Someone get that mulatto linguist in here to explain this.
Irish ?s Lauren Southern 9 years ago

WaPo: The horror in Brussels is a rebuke to Trump's foreign policy

Weird, I didn't know he had one of those since he isn't president.

They also seem to think it's a rebuke to Trump because Belgium's a NATO ally getting attacked, but I'm not sure what the fuck our NATO alliance is supposed to do to stop periodic small scale attacks like this.
1. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
  
  Isn't it crazy how nothing that has happened in the past seven years is in anyway attributable to the man in the White House or the current or previous Secretaries of State? You know, the people who actually make foreign policy?
  1. Irish ?s Lauren Southern 9 years ago
    
    No, see, this attack isn't a rebuke to the European leadership that allowed this problem to fester (particularly the Belgians, given what a shithole Molenbeek has become) or to Islamism or to mass immigration from parts of the world where it's guaranteed some of them will be terrorist nutcases.
    
    It's all about someone who has never actually held political office.
2. WTF 9 years ago
  
  Look, everything bad is due to Trump, even though he has never held office. Because Rethuglikkkan Trumpenproletariat!!11!!! See?
  1. Irish ?s Lauren Southern 9 years ago
    
    Scroll down to the bottom and you'll also see:
    
    "Anne Applebaum: After Brussels, the West must reject dangerous isolationism"
    
    "Jennifer Rubin: Brussels and the danger of Trump"
    
    I hate Trump and even I think these people have lost their fucking minds.
    1. WTF 9 years ago
      
      So, I guess their premise is that bigger American military bases in Europe would have prevented this from happening? That is seriously stupid.
      1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 9 years ago
        
        Bigger American military bases in Europe would have caused the attacks to happen there instead of in Brussels.
        
        This is America's fault.
    2. commodious spittoon 9 years ago
      
      Thanks a lot, now I'm starting to warm to Trump.
    3. Tonio 9 years ago
      
      Anne "No Air on Mars" Applebaum is an idiot and may be safely ignored.
3. Free Society 9 years ago
  
  How is it a rebuke to his foreign policy? Because he wouldn't immediately invade five middle east shitholes for every Muslim crime committed in Europe?
4. straffinrun 9 years ago
  
  Against them is the radical isolationism of Donald Trump,
  
  Well, if you're gonna put it that way.
  1. WTF 9 years ago
    
    Yeah, "bombing ISIS and taking their oil" is radical isolationism now.
    1. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
      
      Don't forget killing their families
  2. Free Society 9 years ago
    
    And Reason is just so certain that The Donald has the worst potential foreign policy of any candidate. I'm sorry but when the GOP rank-and-file brands you an isolationist, you're probably the best foreign policy on the ballot.
    1. CE 9 years ago
      
      Trump looked like the sane one next to Kasich and Rubio and Cruz on foreign policy.
5. lap83 9 years ago
  
  I'm not sure why Democrats even bother running when Republicans are always in control of everything
  1. Derp-o-Matic 5000 9 years ago
    
    The very existence of Republicans is the cause of every bad thing that ever happens.
Chipwooder 9 years ago

It's quarter to 11 - when are we going to get another post, you lazy cosmo bastards?
1. Juvenile Bluster 9 years ago
  
  They're at a cocktail party hosted by Bernie Sanders and Michael Mann, whom they apparently worship according to some commenters here.
  1. Chipwooder 9 years ago
    
    That sounds like the worst cocktail party of all time.
    1. straffinrun 9 years ago
      
      Sex On the Beach made with Bernie's Essence? You can pass, I'm going.
Domestic Dissident 9 years ago

Is Obama's lavish, taxpayer-funded family vacation junket to Cuba officially over yet?

And will grandma and the wife and kids be going to Argentina with him also?
1. Free Society 9 years ago
  
  and Michelle is bringing 40 of her closest friends
  1. Domestic Dissident 9 years ago
    
    At least she's his wife. But never in my life have I ever heard of any American president taking his fucking mother-in-law with him around the world until this assclown.
2. Ken Shultz 9 years ago
  
  Haven't you heard? He ended the Cold War!
  
  Belarus, North Korea, and the Sandinistas haven't gotten the memo yet, but the important thing to remember is that Obama won the Cold War.
Bob Meyer 9 years ago

Jeb's endorsement is the "kiss of death". If Jeb really wanted to help Cruz he would have endorsed Trump.

In other news it was reported that Cruz was endorsed by the Westboro Baptist Church, Goldman Sachs, Bernie Madoff, the Illuminati and the Corleone family.
1. Ken Shultz 9 years ago
  
  Jeb's endorsement may not be the kiss of death with Kasich supporters.
KalkiDas 9 years ago

Flip Flopney, and the nut Beck, both mormons who went there and anti-campaigned for Trump, helped this.
Ask Me Abt Waste Fraud & Abuse 9 years ago

Want to LOL? I have been invited to go with a group of people from an organization (non-political) I support to do a bunch of meetings and lobbying some assholes in Congress.
1. R C Dean 9 years ago
  
  Actually, doing the rounds in Congress can be pretty interesting. If nothing else, it gets you into parts of the Capitol you ordinarily wouldn't see.
  1. Ask Me Abt Waste Fraud & Abuse 9 years ago
    
    I need to find out what committees Amash and Massie are on. If we end up meeting with them, I can get my fangirl on! SQUEEEEE!
2. Je suis Woodchipper 9 years ago
  
  Care to divulge what you'll be lobbying for/against?
  1. Ask Me Abt Waste Fraud & Abuse 9 years ago
    
    Bladder cancer research funding, through the Bladder Cancer Advocacy Network. They did amazing things for my Ma when she was battling the disease.
Hank Phillips 9 years ago

Well... duh! What next? Pope outpolls Trump in walled Vatican City?
Mad Girl Disease 9 years ago

ENB, thank you for the H&R. But please warn when linking to a page that when it loads automatically throws sound at me. It can be triggering. xo MGD

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