Scott Walker Considers Wall on Canadian Border, Kanye West Announces 2020 Run, Space Probe Heads Into Kuiper Belt: A.M. Links

Ed Krayewski | 8.31.2015 9:00 AM

(NASA)

NASA

The Federal Reserve is likely to raise interest rates by the end of the year, despite pressure by some observers to delay the move because of volatility in foreign markets.
President Obama announced he would order Mt. McKinley in Alaska to revert to its Eskimo name Denali, ahead of a trip he is planning to the state next month.
Jeb Bush is now polling below Ben Carson in the Republican presidential contest. Scott Walker, meanwhile, says a a wall along the U.S. border with Canada is a "legitimate" idea.
After a deputy was shot and killed in Houston, the Harris County sheriff blamed "anti-police rhetoric." Authorities already have a suspect, who has been charged with capital murder.
At the MTV Video Music Awards, Kanye West announced he'd be running for president in 2020.
Neurologist Oliver Sacks died this weekend. So did Wes Craven, the horror filmmaker.
The space probe New Horizons is headed for 2014 MU 69, a comet in the Kuiper Belt.

New at Reason.com:

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A British Lesson on Vaping for the CDC Tom Frieden should listen to what English public health officials say about e-cigarettes. By Jacob Sullum
Prison Nation How America's incarceration system is like a distinct nation By Daniel J. D'Amico
Maryland Man Fined $50 for Picking Berries in Park A Maryland man received a $50 ticket for picking raspberries. The ticket charged him with "destroying/interfering with plants to wit: berries." By Baylen Linnekin

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Fist of Etiquette 10 years ago

The space probe New Horizons is headed for 2014 MU 69, a comet in the Kuiper Belt.

Unless they build a fence.
1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
  
  IS THAT SOME SORT OF SLAM ON STAR TREK V?!?!?!?!
  1. BearOdinson 10 years ago
    
    We don't talk about that!
  2. Adans smith 10 years ago
    
    Star Trek sucks,yeah I said it.
  3. Fist of Etiquette 10 years ago
    
    That one kind of slams itself.
2. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
  
  Hello.
  
  Hey Canada, Harper will kill your grand children:
  
  http://bit.ly/1NS7sa1
  1. gaijin 10 years ago
    
    Will you be training to scale the wall...or on building tunnels beneath it?
    1. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
      
      I don't know but Harper going off killing kids is a serious crime!
    2. Pope Jimbo 10 years ago
      
      Ski jump over the fence, duh!
      
      Or simply paddle your canoe across the BWCA and come watch hockey in Minnesota. Tundra and I will leave the light on.
Bee Tagger 10 years ago

The space probe New Horizons is headed for 2014 MU 69

Nice.
1. Florida Man 10 years ago
  
  Nicccce.
Fist of Etiquette 10 years ago

President Obama announced he would order Mt. McKinley in Alaska to revert to its Eskimo name Denali, ahead of a trip he is planning to the state next month.

Denali, it ain't just a mountain in Alaska.
1. Slammer 10 years ago
  
  Eskimos have 27 different names for President
  1. Marshall Gill 10 years ago
    
    Is "shit head" one of them by any chance?
  2. AlmightyJB 10 years ago
    
    Are they all variations of Bush and Clinton?
2. WTF 10 years ago
  
  "Denali, the native Koyukon Athabascan word for "The Great One" or "The High One,"
  
  So, he's basically saying let's just drop any name and go back to calling it "Big Mountain". Because, feelz, I guess.
  1. Zeb 10 years ago
    
    Well, mostly because that's what most people call it already. I'm wondering how he figures the president is in charge of naming mountains, but McKinley was a stupid name.
    1. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
      
      It's just part of his 'fundamentally transforming America' agenda. He has to do it on his own because Red Sea.
    2. Free Society 10 years ago
      
      but McKinley was a stupid name.
      
      This president is clearly scornful of all things Irish, likely to distance himself from his own roots in the O'Bama clan.
      1. Agammamon 10 years ago
        
        So, that's what they mean by 'black Irish'?
        
        Number.6 10 years ago
        
        Yep. The clan from around Burnt Cork.
  2. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    Meh. It's not like McKinley created the mountain, or was the first human to see it. While I'm not happy about the politically correct churning, this is fairly harmless and inexpensive compared to the many other forms of mischief in which government engages.
    1. In League with the Dark Ones 10 years ago
      
      How much will it cost to replace the maps?
  3. Pope Jimbo 10 years ago
    
    Has no one thought of the domestic violence this will lead to? It isn't hard to see how this will lead to a surge in ER cases to remove small plastic triangles from various orifices after family games of Trivial Pursuit turn ugly.
    
    I think Congress should at least pass an unfunded mandate that the Trivial Pursuit company should have to replace all trivia cards - free of charge - that list the incorrect name of the highest mountain in N. America.
    
    Or better yet, Liz Warren can sic her Consumer Protection board on the Trivial Pursuit company for not immediately replacing those cards in the first place. She can insist on a large class action payout.
  4. Rhywun 10 years ago
    
    "Denali, the native Koyukon Athabascan word for "The Great One" or "The High One,"
    
    By executive order, Obama will now be referred to as "Denali".
    1. In League with the Dark Ones 10 years ago
      
      Obama the High One?
3. Zeb 10 years ago
  
  Eskimos? I'm pretty sure they don't live near Denali. It's the Athabaskan name. It's such a prominent mountain that I would imagine there are other native names for it as well.
  
  Most people call it Denali anyway. But since when does the president get to decide what mountains are called?
  1. WTF 10 years ago
    
    Since FYTW has been brought to the next level by the current occupant.
  2. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    I believe that USGS is responsible for maintaining the official names of topo features, so yeah.
    1. BigT 10 years ago
      
      January 21, 2017:
      
      President Trump today announced that the former Denali (Mt. McKinley) will now be called 'The Donald'
      1. WTF 10 years ago
        
        He will have a giant neon "TRUMP" sign erected on its summit.
        
        commodious spittoon 10 years ago
        
        How big will it be?
        
        db 10 years ago
        
        Pretty large?
        
        commodious spittoon 10 years ago
        
        It's gonna be 'UUUUUUGE
        
        Citizen X 10 years ago
        
        E fucking NORMOUS.
  3. Chinny Chin Chin 10 years ago
    
    Commerce clause.
    
    Duh.
  4. some guy 10 years ago
    
    But since when does the president get to decide what mountains are called?
    
    I'd rather he be doing figurehead type stuff than stuff that actually has an impact on people's lives. Best to just give him busy work until his term is up.
    1. Don'tTreadOnMeChipper 10 years ago
      
      Totally agree. Hey, Mr. President, there are a lot of rivers and mountains in the United States! Get to work! You have a mandate!!
    2. kV 10 years ago
      
      Yeah, this. I used to be upset by Congress wasting time and money naming post offices, but no more.
  5. Florida Man 10 years ago
    
    The linked story looks like the name was changed by some flunky in some government agency. It was name McKinley with the stroke of a pen, I see no reason it can't be changed back with a stroke of the pen.
    1. Zeb 10 years ago
      
      Yeah, it's about the least bad executive action he could take. And I do favor the name change. But it has been my understanding that there has been pretty broad agreement that it should bechanged for some time, but that senators from Ohio kept preventing it somehow.
      1. pan fried wylie 10 years ago
        
        there has been pretty broad agreement that it should bechanged for some time, but that senators from Ohio kept preventing it somehow.
        
        Democracy!
      2. Florida Man 10 years ago
        
        senators from Ohio kept preventing it somehow.
        
        I'm guessing it's a big deal to Ohio voters and who cares what non-voting Inuits think.
        
        Bobarian (Would Chip Her) 10 years ago
        
        Ohio can just rename Toledo or Dayton...
        
        Never Cleveland, though, because some things just have to set the standard.
        
        LCD
  6. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
    
    I thought we were supposed to stop calling them Eskimos.
    
    Except the Edmonton Eskimos of the CFL of course.
    
    They rock.
    1. pan fried wylie 10 years ago
      
      The preferred nomenclature is Polar Gook, eh?
      1. WTF 10 years ago
        
        I thought it was Ice Naggers.
        
        pan fried wylie 10 years ago
        
        they do annoy the shit outta me....
    2. Zeb 10 years ago
      
      It's funny. From what I can gather, in Canada "Eskimo" is generally taken as some terrible slur, while US Eskimos don't seem to care and often call themselves that.
      1. PM 10 years ago
        
        Two countries separated by a common language.
      2. Geoff Nathan 10 years ago
        
        This 'slur' story seems to be false. There's an urban legend (or perhaps an SJW legend) that it means 'raw flesh eaters' in Cree (another local Indian group, not related either to Athabascan or Inuit) but apparently that's not true--you can read the long story in the Wikipedia entry on the origins of the name).
        
        Interestingly, linguists (who generally try to be politically correct) call the name of the language family Eskimo-Aleut (Eskimo/Inuit is a sister-language of the language spoken in extreme Northeastern Siberia)
        
        'Inuit' just means 'the people', a common language name (same thing for 'Bantu').
      3. Ivan Pike 10 years ago
        
        It's funny. From what I can gather, in Canada "Eskimo" is generally taken as some terrible slur, while US Eskimos don't seem to care and often call themselves that.
        
        This is correct. Just don't call a non-Eskimo an Eskimo. I'm talking to you Ed, Athabaskan is not an Eskimo-Aleut language.
        
        I am glad they officially changed the name, but it really doesn't matter because most people call it Denali anyway.
        
        SugarFree 10 years ago
        
        Athabaskan is not even Athabaskan any longer.
        
        Ivan Pike 10 years ago
        
        The Na-Den? language family also includes Navajo, which I find strange.
  7. Pope Jimbo 10 years ago
    
    Well, I'm so ashamed of Minnesoda now. The DNC had their summer meeting here in Minneapolis and we were horrible hosts.
    
    We totally didn't get around to changing the name of Lake Calhoun to something else. http://www.startribune.com/lak.....309249161/
    
    Sure the DNC was nice enough to not point at the lake and go "Ewwww", but we all knew they were thinking it.
    
    So I'm all for President Obama getting shit like this done!
    1. Free Society 10 years ago
      
      Efforts to change a name that honors a champion of slavery and states rights date back more than a decade.
      
      His advocacy of federalism was as bad as his advocacy of slavery or something.
  8. Rhywun 10 years ago
    
    Most people call it Denali anyway.
    
    I was not aware of that, but if people insist... I will call it "Mt. Denali" because that is how mountains are referred to in my language.
    1. db 10 years ago
      
      +1
    2. Slammer 10 years ago
      
      You said "mount" huh huh huhhuhhuh
  9. John Titor 10 years ago
    
    Also, this might be a Canadian thing, but isn't the term 'eskimos' supposed to be really, really offensive? 'Inuit' has been the term we've been using for over a decade.
    1. John Titor 10 years ago
      
      Nevermind, really should have read more of the thread, been covered.
  10. Mo 10 years ago
    
    Through the Secretary of Interior, since 1947. Generally, states chose the name and the Feds went along with it, but Ohio has been blocking it by putting votes up for consideration by playing the USGS policy of not changing names that were under Congressional consideration. The SOI can overrule the board if they do not resolve it in a reasonable time.
    
    http://www.usatoday.com/story/...../71426656/
    
    http://www.gpo.gov/fdsys/pkg/U.....sec364.htm
4. Jerryskids 10 years ago
  
  President Obama announced he would order Mt. McKinley in Alaska to revert to its Eskimo name Denali, ahead of a trip he is planning to the state next month.
  
  What if Denali self-identifies as McKinley?
  1. Number 2 10 years ago
    
    According to the New York Times article, this is Obama's "latest attempt" to comply with a 2008 campaign promise to improve relations with native American tribes.
    
    It only took him seven years to get around to it. And this is the apex of his efforts. Now that's what I call keeping the campaign promise.
    1. WTF 10 years ago
      
      Are you forgetting how he closed Gitmo?
    2. Illocust 10 years ago
      
      Can we just revoke reservations already? I like my Indian casinos as much as the next girl, but having this separation is just silly now days.
      1. Free Society 10 years ago
        
        More reservations please.
      2. kbolino 10 years ago
        
        Aren't many of them established by treaty?
        
        Ivan Pike 10 years ago
        
        Aren't many of them established by treaty?
        
        Yes.
        
        Peachy rex 10 years ago
        
        Yeah, but it's not like the Feds ever gave a shit about a treaty with the Injuns.
        
        Illocust 10 years ago
        
        Treaties can be undone. Everything has an out clause, nothing exists in perpetuity.
        
        Ivan Pike 10 years ago
        
        nothing exists in perpetuity.
        
        The lawsuits from that action would.
5. The Last American Hero 10 years ago
  
  How are you going to prove your hipster climber cred now? Guess we'll have to start calling Mt. Rainier Tahoma again.
6. LynchPin1477 10 years ago
  
  Call the mountain Denali (which as Zeb points out is what most people call it anyway) and rename the park McKinley National Park. Every one is happy.
  
  Or not. This is a silly thing for all but a very small number of people to get worked up over.
7. Karl Hungus 10 years ago
  
  President Obama announced he would order Mt. McKinley in Alaska to revert to its Eskimo name Denali, ahead of a trip he is planning to the state next month.
  
  When I first saw that headline yesterday, my first thought was that there had been a Confederate general named McKinley whom I'd never heard of.
  1. CatoTheChipper 10 years ago
    
    McKinley was even worse than a Confederate general; he was a Republican. (Confederate generals were either apolitical or Democrats.)
8. TimothyZ 10 years ago
  
  Isn't the word Esk*mo racist now? I'm pretty sure it means you're a racist if you say that while being the wrong ethnicity. Can we have any sociology majors weigh in here?
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Oficially change the national bird of the United States of America to fried chicken

We the people should change the national bird of the United States of America to fried chicken.

Bald eagles are nice birds and all, but few people will ever even see a bald eagle and even fewer people know anything about the habits and inclinations of bald eagles. In contrast, fried chicken is beloved around the world. Fried chicken is delicious. Everybody knows about fried chicken and the overwhelming majority of people like it.

Along with blues, jazz, and rock & roll, fried chicken is one of the United States of America's precious gifts to the universe. We should recognize this by making fried chicken the national bird.

sign the petition
1. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
  
  He has a long way to go by the end of the day.
2. SIV 10 years ago
  
  +1 watermelon Slurpee
3. AlmightyJB 10 years ago
  
  I had the best fried chicken Saturdat that I've had in years. I was very happy about that.
4. Zeb 10 years ago
  
  How is fried eagle?
  1. straffinrun 10 years ago
    
    He's doing better. That peace pipe did singe his lips though.
  2. MacDaddy81 10 years ago
    
    It tastes like freedom.
  3. Elspeth Flashman 10 years ago
    
    It tastes like chicken.
5. Adans smith 10 years ago
  
  There's a eagle nest on a island where I waterfowl hunt.It's cool watching then soar.If you an fool them and the blue herons the ducks and geese will come right in
  1. commodious spittoon 10 years ago
    
    Don't let the EPA know where.
6. Enough About Woodchippers 10 years ago
  
  but few people will ever even see a bald eagle
  
  Bullshit. They fly all over the Twin Cities. Millions of people have seen them.
  1. Number.6 10 years ago
    
    They're not exactly rare, nationally. Regardless of what the EPA might say.
  2. kV 10 years ago
    
    There's a nesting pair behind my in-laws' house in Florida. The gubment moved the nest a few trees over due to all of the bald eagle shit pouring down on houses, seriously like a quart or half-gallon at a time. (BTW, a google search of "bald eagle defecate" returns 0 results, therefore good band name.)
7. db 10 years ago
  
  "Few people will ever even see a bald eagle..."
  
  WTF?
  1. Azathoth!! 10 years ago
    
    "Few people who live in places that matter will ever even see a bald eagle...."
    
    FTFY
Fist of Etiquette 10 years ago

President Obama announced he would order Mt. McKinley in Alaska to revert to its Eskimo name Denali, ahead of a trip he is planning to the state next month.

Why doesn't he just rename it Mount Redskins. Racist.
Bee Tagger 10 years ago

Jeb Bush is now polling below Ben Carson in the Republican presidential contest.

That must be how they would be ranked alphabetically, IN SPANISH.
Fist of Etiquette 10 years ago

President Obama announced he would order Mt. McKinley in Alaska to revert to its Eskimo name Denali, ahead of a trip he is planning to the state next month.

I guess Obama needs a legacy more than Ohio's electoral votes.
Monty Crisco 10 years ago

I'M BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!
1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
  
  Did you burst through a door, Jack Nicholson in the Shining style, or maybe Kool-Aid Man, through a wall?
  1. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
    
    Kool-Aid man style!!! ALWAYS!!!
    1. 3 10 years ago
      
      Oh yeah!!!
    2. Elspeth Flashman 10 years ago
      
      Wait, what about Meatloaf style in Rocky Horror Picture Show?
Derpetologist 10 years ago

Spot the Not: parliament & congress fights around the world

1. In this country, a congressman decided to finish a heated discussion with another congressman with a punch in the jaw. He was suspended 120 days from the legislature for the violent act.

2. In this country, an MP ripped ripped a proposal out of another MP's hand and ate it to prevent a vote on the proposal.

3. In this country, politicians fought each other with smoke bombs and eggs.

4. In this country, the opposing sides are separated by a red line in the carpet. The red lines in front of the two sets of benches are two sword-lengths apart. An MP is traditionally not allowed to cross the line during debates, supposedly because the an MP might then be able to attack an individual on the opposite side. These procedures were made because the MPs were allowed to carry weapons in the past.

5. In this country, an MP was seized and held down while another MP farted on his head.

6. In this country, an MP was enraged by a group who began singing a leftist song. He seized a ceremonial mace and brandished it over his head.
1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
  
  5...I so want it to be true, however.
2. WTF 10 years ago
  
  5. But I hope I'm wrong.
3. straffinrun 10 years ago
  
  6. Only brandishing, though. Coward.
4. Number.6 10 years ago
  
  All of those sound like "Business as usual" in the Australian Parliament.
  1. Jerryskids 10 years ago
    
    It is more fun to imagine all these acts taking place with all the participants holding a Foster's in one hand.
  2. DEG 10 years ago
    
    I see what you did there
5. Derpetologist 10 years ago
  
  5 is the Not. The rest are from Peru, Taiwan, Ukraine, and the UK.
  
  Prize: I found a video where John Cleese and other Pythons defended their movie Life of Brian to some English clergymen. It in inspired a parody where some clergymen defended their mockery of Monty Python to a rabid Monty Python fan:
  
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XUOfi-8Op1c
  1. In League with the Dark Ones 10 years ago
    
    I'm disappointed you didn't include one Congressmember beating another nearly into a coma with a cane.
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Again? /Rocky the squirrel

Clinton resets campaign strategy

Hillary Clinton is resetting her campaign strategy with aggressive attacks against Republicans to move the conversation away from questions about the email controversy that has dogged her for months.

By comparing Republicans to terrorists and calling the GOP "the party of Trump," Clinton grabbed headlines and sought to assuage doubts about her campaign, even while it has lost ground in recent polls.

Democratic strategists say while her talking points are the same as they have been, her delivery, emphasis and posture has changed.
1. Drake 10 years ago
  
  So Republicans are terrorists, but the guys who killed Christopher Stevens (possibly with help of information from her unsecured emails or server) aren't?
  1. some guy 10 years ago
    
    possibly with help of information from her unsecured emails or server
    
    Is there any evidence at all to back this up? Any?
    
    Look, I dislike the Clin-ton as much as the next guy, but let's at least try to not look like crazy fringe-dwellers here.
    1. Tonio 10 years ago
      
      Lack of evidence is not the same as evidence of lack. I'm sure the Clintonistas would very, very much like that topic to disappear from the popular discourse. By keeping it going we take the risk of looking fringey, but also increase the odds that people will keep questioning this.
    2. Drake 10 years ago
      
      Steven's travel and security plans were in her emails and stored on the unsecured server.
      
      http://nypost.com/2015/08/23/h.....officials/
      
      She was also forwarding this information to Blumenthal's private email which we know was hacked. There is a reason that this kind of information is supposed to be treated carefully - because it gets people killed.
    3. BigT 10 years ago
      
      "I saw emails that have been revealed under the Freedom of Information Act," Napolitano said. "And in them, she is discussing the location of French fighter jets during the NATO bombardment of Libya, how big the no-fly zone is, where the no-fly zones are, and are you ready for this? ? the location of Ambassador Stevens, who of course was murdered, in Libya. If that is not classified ? if she didn't know that was classified, she has no business being in public office."
      
      I usually trust Napolitano. So, YES.
      1. some guy 10 years ago
        
        Hmm. Okay. It's still speculation, but at least there is a possibility. I'll reserve judgment until more information comes out.. if it ever does.
        
        Drake 10 years ago
        
        1 Fact: Hillary left information on Stevens' location and security unsecured in multiple locations.
        
        2 Fact: Stevens attacked, captured, and executed in a well-coordinated attack by a group with good intelligence on the consulate.
        
        Speculation: 1 and 2 are connected. Anyone other than Hillary it wouldn't matter in the criminal prosecution.
  2. Zaytsev 10 years ago
    
    Republicans are terrorists that should be ashamed of their top candidate calling Huma's husband a perv.
    
    Cause, even ISIS wouldn't stoop that low.
  3. CatoTheChipper 10 years ago
    
    Everybody knows that Benghazi was just a bunch of overexcited protesters who were upset about a blasphemous video made by an American. Obviously, the US should repeal the first amendment to avoid such incidents, but at this point what difference does it make?
2. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  Slate says she's also trying to make this election seem like a coronation now. All these changes in strategy seem like the biggest indicator that she's actually in trouble.
3. WTF 10 years ago
  
  I like how they assume "party of Trump" will somehow be perceived as worse than "party of Clinton".
4. Number.6 10 years ago
  
  When your only tool is a 'Reset Button', yeah, you're gonna use it a lot.
Slammer 10 years ago

Charges dropped against Florida man who played Star Spangled Banner on 4th of July
1. Florida Man 10 years ago
  
  Fuck. It's time to take the American flag down off my porch. God I hate the Jacksonville and surrounding police.
2. Karl Hungus 10 years ago
  
  Charges dropped against Florida man who played Star Spangled Banner on 4th of July
  
  Ha, good to see. This was about five miles from my house, so I remember the story well. The cops in Neptune Beach really don't have much in the way of actual crime to deal with, so stuff like this is how they kepe themselves entertained.
PM 10 years ago

Generation Stress

Millennials (18-33 year olds) and Generation X (34-46 year olds) are now called Generation Stress. That's because for the last three years, the American Psychological Association's research on stress has found Millennials to be the most stressed demographic in America, with Generation X coming in a close second.

Both generations report almost twice the level of stress that's considered safe from serious health risk. Fifty-two percent of Millennials and 45 percent of Gen Xers say their stress has continued to increase over the last five years. Over 40 percent of both generations say they're having problems with anxiety, anger, irritability, and depression, and over 70 percent of Millennials say they are not getting enough sleep.
1. SIV 10 years ago
  
  47 and up are Boomers now?
  1. Zeb 10 years ago
    
    Seems like they keep changing it. I thought the boomer cutoff was 1965.
  2. WTF 10 years ago
    
    I don't get that either. I thought the Boomer generation was cut off at 1962.
    1. Florida Man 10 years ago
      
      They're the ones with the heavy artillery.
    2. SugarFree 10 years ago
      
      I was born in 1970. I'm pretty sure when I first heard "Generation X" I was at the young end of the range, and now I'm at the oldest.
      1. Mrs. Lemuel Struthers 10 years ago
        
        I was born in '71 and assumed I was gen-x. My birthday is on Thursday; please send gifts in lieu of well wishes.
        
        Karl Hungus 10 years ago
        
        I was born in '71 and assumed I was gen-x. My birthday is on Thursday; please send gifts in lieu of well wishes.
        
        I have a gift card for Golden Corral that has your name on it. Should be arriving in your mail in the next day or two, just in time for you to celebrate on Thursday.
        
        SoGrimSoTrueSoReal 10 years ago
        
        Wow, we have the same birthday/year. My long lost twin separated at birth?
      2. Lee G 10 years ago
        
        I share a birth year with the Dark One?
        
        Shit.
        
        Monty Crisco 10 years ago
        
        Racist motherfucker....
        
        Lee G 10 years ago
        
        Racist motherfucker....
        
        It's true, it's so true.....
        
        *sobs quietly, issues mea culpa on tumblr account*
        
        Zeb 10 years ago
        
        You fuck your mother?
        
        Lee G 10 years ago
        
        No, I'm not Epi.
        
        *shudders*
        
        SugarFree 10 years ago
        
        Bwa-ha-ha.
  3. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    Meh. The post-WW2 birthrate didn't actually flatten out until around 1975. A more typical cutoff point is the mid-sixties when the birthrate went down to pre-WW2 levels, but it's complicated since pre-WW2 the birthrate was already trending up.
  4. Rhywun 10 years ago
    
    47 and up are Boomers now?
    
    Yeah, ridiculous. My brothers and I range from 46 to 53 and none of us are "boomers". I'm guessing the idiotic ranges were devised in order to elicit the desired results.
2. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
  
  No kidding Millennials are stressed. Have you seen what they go through on campuses?
  
  NOT ENOUGH TRIGGER WARNINGS!
  
  As for GEN X, we came in after the Boomers. We have an excuse.
  1. Elspeth Flashman 10 years ago
    
    I'm still so waiting for all the damn boomers to retire. Please! retire! We are all officially sick of you.
    1. Marty Feldman's Eyes 10 years ago
      
      Eh, when they're retired they'll have more free time to be annoying.
    2. Marty Feldman's Eyes 10 years ago
      
      Eh, when they're retired they'll have more free time to be annoying.
3. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  I can believe it on the millennial front. The job market is still murder, and we don't have comfy retirements to look forward to any time soon.
  1. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
    
    Shouldn't have voted for Obama then....
    1. PM 10 years ago
      
      I don't know what you talkin' bout, I voted for Gary Johnson.
    2. Illocust 10 years ago
      
      I didn't vote. I was too busy studying to cast a vote in the already decided election in Texas.
4. Irish ?s ESB 10 years ago
  
  Millennials are obviously stressed because we can hardly leave our houses without a Reason pollster jumping out of the bushes and asking us our opinions on gay marriage or the federal deficit.
  1. Aloysious 10 years ago
    
    If Emily Ekins wanted to poll me I would certainly feel something, although I don't think I would call it stress.
Bee Tagger 10 years ago

President Obama announced he would order Mt. McKinley in Alaska to revert to its Eskimo name Denali, ahead of a trip he is planning to the state next month.

This honestly sounds like what I can only guess is the plot of The Chronicles of Riddick
1. Enough About Woodchippers 10 years ago
  
  I wonder what Chrysler has to say about this...
Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago

The space probe New Horizons is headed for 2014 MU 69, a comet in the Kuiper Belt.

Pending Pro L's approval, naturally.
Lee G 10 years ago

Who in their right mind would want to keep Canadian actresses out of the country?
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Woman, 80, trampled to death in Venezuelan supermarket stampede
Rush for subsidized goods sees 75 people injured as thousands besiege supermarket

The opposition Democratic Unity coalition said Maria Aguirre died and another 75 people were injured - including five security officials - in chaotic scenes when National Guard troops sought to control a 5,000-strong crowd with teargas.

"Due to the shortage of food ... the desperation is enormous," local opposition politician Andres Camejo said, according to the coalition's website. It published a photo of an elderly woman's body lying inert on a concrete floor.

Camejo said thieves had also attacked the crowd, members of which were seeking to buy cheap food on offer at an outlet of the state's Mercal supermarket chain in Barinas state.
1. Juvenile Bluster 10 years ago
  
  Damn capitalist wreckers sullying Venezuela's perfect socialist paradise.
  1. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
    
    Capitalism: is there anything it can't do?
2. SugarFree 10 years ago
  
  Aquirre, The Wrath of Groceries
3. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
  
  AmSoc applauds. She was probably a kulak, or a wrecker.
4. WTF 10 years ago
  
  The only problem is that the right Top Men are not in charge of the food distribution. They just need to Socialism harder.
  1. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
    
    "President Nicolas Maduro accuses opponents of deliberately stirring up trouble, exaggerating incidents, and sabotaging the economy to try and bring down his socialist government. "
    
    If so, seems like they are doing a convincing job of it. Maybe they SHOULD be in charge...
Fist of Etiquette 10 years ago

Scott Walker, meanwhile, says a a wall along the U.S. border with Canada is a "legitimate" idea.

Keep your fucking syrup and hockey, hosers.
1. AlmightyJB 10 years ago
  
  He also want's to deport Ted Cruz.
2. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
  
  I was going to yell at you, Fist - but I figure I can start a second career smuggling Tim Hortons and poutine...so BUILD THAT WALL!
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Islamic State Flips Gold Coins to Break Fed `Enslavement'

The jihadist group on Saturday touted "the return of the gold dinar" in an hour-long video issued by its media wing, al Hayat. Islamic State's policy-making Shura Council last year tasked its Beit al Mal, or treasury, with minting the coins, which come in several denominations made of gold, silver and copper.

The currency is meant to break the shackles of "the capitalist financial system of enslavement, underpinned by a piece of paper called the Federal Reserve dollar note," the group said in the video. It didn't explain where the coins were being minted, nor how they'll be distributed or replace currencies circulating in the territory the group occupies in parts of Iraq and Syria.

Islamic State first announced its intention to issue its own money in November, five months after it seized the northern Iraqi city of Mosul and its leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi announced a caliphate. The move was seen by analysts as part of the group's efforts to build the institutions of a functioning state.
1. straffinrun 10 years ago
  
  Does the coin have a head on one side and the body on the other?
  1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
    
    *narrows gaze*
    
    (late due to technical errors)
2. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
  
  When they are eventually overthrown, I wonder what those coins will go for, as far as collector prices?
3. BearOdinson 10 years ago
  
  So even 8th century goat fuckers understand the concept of sound currency. We are so doomed!
  1. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    See, we knew you Paultard goldbugs supported ISIS. /prog
    1. Mrs. Lemuel Struthers 10 years ago
      
      ^This. Goldbugs are terrorists and need to be droned (after their contraband is seized).
4. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  Not a bad idea. Metal coins have value even if the state minting them has credibility issues. Worst case you can always sell them in a currency you trust.
  
  If they keep making decisions like this they are going to be here for the long run. It would be the psycho monsters that would establish a new country in my lifetime.
  1. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
    
    I buy silver and gold coins on a regular basis now.
5. Free Society 10 years ago
  
  This is ISIS's new silver coin.
  1. Free Society 10 years ago
    
    wrong thread *holds up mirror, narrow gazes at self*
    1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
      
      Thank you.
Bee Tagger 10 years ago

At the MTV Video Music Awards, Kanye West announced he'd be running for president in 2020.

The West v. Swift debates will be truly epic.
1. Enough About Woodchippers 10 years ago
  
  Just to reiterate, I adore Miley Cyrus's tits.
PM 10 years ago

A Long Island educator alleges he was labeled a racist and fired for enforcing academic eligibility requirements for student athletes.

In February 2013, he began checking grades for all the kids participating in winter sports in the district, such as basketball, wrestling and indoor track, and informing coaches of who would not be allowed to play, Cincotta, who is white, says in court papers.

The effort prompted a call from the superintendent's assistant, who slammed him as a "racist" and told him he was "trying to hurt black kids," Cincotta alleges.
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Man Busted After His Dog Tests Positive For Meth

According to cops, Marty Allen Rogers, 47, last week brought his terrier mix to an animal hospital for treatment. The dog, named "Little Guy," was "extremely nervous and constantly paces and panting and restless," veterinarian Kevin Chapman told investigators.

Chapman told police that "Little Guy" subsequently "tested positive for Methamphetamine." Investigators believe that the dog--which was turned over to an animal control officer--ingested the drug at Rogers's residence in Talmo, a town about 30 miles from Athens.
1. PM 10 years ago
  
  I wonder if it's standard veterinary practice to check for meth when a dog comes in with those symptoms, or if it's a particularly meth-heavy region where they've seen this kind of thing before.
  1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
    
    I suspect they have seen this before...
2. AlmightyJB 10 years ago
  
  Moral of story. Never take dog to vet.
  1. Citizen X 10 years ago
    
    No, the moral is, take better care of your meth so your dog can't eat it.
3. straffinrun 10 years ago
  
  The dog, named "Little Guy," was "extremely nervous and constantly paces and panting and restless,"
  
  Should've named the dog 'Buscemi'
  1. The Last American Hero 10 years ago
    
    So, the dog was a terrier?
  2. Slammer 10 years ago
    
    You're out of your element, Little Guy!
4. Zeb 10 years ago
  
  So, no doctor/patient confidentiality for vets, I guess.
  1. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    My 9:23 below was supposed to be in response to this.
    1. Zeb 10 years ago
      
      That was way too serious of an answer.
5. Tonio 10 years ago
  
  terrier mix...was "extremely nervous and constantly paces and panting and restless"
  
  That is abnormal...how? (joke)
6. Tonio 10 years ago
  
  No. HIPAA only covers human patients. The vet might also have a mandatory duty to report in suspected animal abuse or neglect in that jurisdiction.
7. BigT 10 years ago
  
  Criminal dog. Great photo.
Slammer 10 years ago

The Reproducibility Project, the giant study to re-run experiments reported in three top psychology journals, has just published its results and its either a disaster, a triumph or both for psychology.

The full paper: Estimating the reproducibility of psychological science
1. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  Does anyone know if there is a way to donate to these guys? I'm behind monetarily supporting reproducibility studies.
  1. Jerryskids 10 years ago
    
    If you want to help, Retraction Watch and The Center For Scientific Integrity has been on the case for years.
    
    It's a shame the above story focused on psychology since everybody already knows those people are full of shit but the vast majority of all scientific studies are probably no less dubious. Many of us are aware that every time you see a headline about some new scientific miracle it's probably a crap article because science just doesn't discover new cures for cancer every damn week. It's a single study with some anomolous results that gets trumpeted as a breakthrough in science and nobody ever publishes the twelve follow-up studies that conclude the first study was wrong. And more and more it's getting harder to find anybody willing to do the 12 follow-up studies, some huge percentage of studies suggesting some new knowledge are never followed up on. They're too busy trumpeting the next new cure for cancer, and that's a lot of what's wrong with science as it's currently practiced. You get money and attention by making new and interesting discoveries even if you gotta fudge the data, nobody cares about studies that prove the null hypothesis even though knowing what doesn't work is an important part of finding out what does work.
    1. Illocust 10 years ago
      
      Thank you for the information.
      1. Jerryskids 10 years ago
        
        I should point out that the author of the study in Slammer's post runs the data side of the Retraction Watch project.
Derpetologist 10 years ago

Derpy's Army Countdown: 13 weeks left

motivational thought: if you're going through hell, keep going
motivational song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YdXQJS3Yv0Y

Ran a mile in 6m50s yesterday.

OT: it must be hard to lip read a tonal language. I found a page for deaf Chinese people that talked about it.
1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
  
  DROP AND DO PUSH UPS UNTIL I GET TIRED!
  
  /Drill Sargeant
  1. Jerryskids 10 years ago
    
    He said deaf Chinese people. Yelling in English only works for deaf English-speaking persons or foreign-language speakers who can hear.
2. Florida Man 10 years ago
  
  Did you watch "no time for Seargents"? Are you friends with your DI yet?
  1. Derpetologist 10 years ago
    
    My maternal grandfather was drafted into the Army during WW2. For various reasons, he never got regular basic training. He spent most of his time doing illustrations for training manuals.
    
    Anyway, when it came to light that he had never gotten basic training, he got a rushed course where a lieutenant drove him around in a jeep past an obstacle course and described it: "so over there, you'd climb that wall, then you'd crawl under that barbed wire, then..."
    
    He had been living in Baltimore before he got drafted. On his forms, he put his home of record as Louisville KY, but for some reason, when they discharged him, they only gave him enough money to get back to Baltimore. He had to hitch hike back to KY. He hated the Army and said it was for slobs and morons. But he was absolutely in love with the Civil Air Patrol.
  2. l0b0t 10 years ago
    
    Andy Griffith at his finest; damn, what a great film. There is also a television adaptation starring Griffith which, I think, predates the film by a few years. I would also recommend See Here, Private Hargrove and Private's Progress
    1. Florida Man 10 years ago
      
      Thanks. I'll look for them.
3. MacDaddy81 10 years ago
  
  I have maxed both push ups and situps, but never got better than a 7:15 mile pace. Good for you. Keep it up.
4. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
  
  Don't believe the hype on Chinese. If it is SOOOO dependent on tonality, then 80% of the population would be incoherent, as they do not use a perfect Beijing accent. That is NOT the case. Even if someone has a southern accent here in America, you can still WELL understand what they say.
  
  The problem for lipreaders in Chinese is probably the monosyllabic nature of Chinese and the speed at which a lot of Chinese speak.
  
  I never heard of this problem in Japanese and I worked at a few deaf schools there. Makes sense, as Japanese is a more monosyllabic language than Zhongwen.
  
  I am DLPT'd in both.
  1. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
    
    Oh, yeah, good run time too, BTW.
    1. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
      
      Japanese is a more *POLYSYLLABIC* language
  2. Frank Frankelson 10 years ago
    
    ^This. Once everyone figures out what is going on, they don't really use tones in normal conversation. DLI will still be wanting their tones though.
    1. Heroic Mulatto 10 years ago
      
      Once everyone figures out what is going on, they don't really use tones in normal conversation
      
      ?????
      1. Frank Frankelson 10 years ago
        
        Or the use of tones becomes much more informal and the words become more context based, at least in Mandrin.
        
        Monty Crisco 10 years ago
        
        ^ True dis.
        
        Heroic Mulatto 10 years ago
        
        What you might be describing is your interpretation of tone sandhi. Nevertheless, research has shown for a native speaker of a tonal language, the toneme isn't a layer that is placed on top of the phoneme, like prosodic intonation, but the pitch contouring is considered part of the phoneme production of an utterance, just as much as place and manner of articulation, etc.
        
        What you're saying is like if English speakers formally distinguish between vowel quality and quantity (e.g., bad, bed, bid, bud, bod), but when speaking conversationally, we reduce the vowel in all those words to the schwa (cuz, if I say "buhd", you know if I mean bad, bed, bid, etc.)
        
        Monty Crisco 10 years ago
        
        I LIKE IT!!!
  3. Geoff Nathan 10 years ago
    
    The big problem for lipreaders in Chinese is that there's really no such thing as 'Chinese'. The different regions have languages that are as different as French and Italian. Some have four tones (Mandarin) while others have five or six (Cantonese). And the tones are different too.
    
    What makes it weird is that they all write the language with the same symbols. But of course we all write numbers the same (mostly)--'6' is pronounced quite differently in French, Malay and Swahili, but written the same.
  4. Heroic Mulatto 10 years ago
    
    Makes sense, as Japanese is a more monosyllabic language than Zhongwen.
    
    Don't you mean polysyllabic? Chinese is an analytic language; whereas, Japanese is highly agglutinative.
    1. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
      
      Fuck me you are right. Correction issued.
      1. Heroic Mulatto 10 years ago
        
        No need for fucking; I'm a happily married man. 🙂 But, yes, I can see how lip reading would be easier in a polysyllabic language. If I may ask, what did you do at the deaf schools over there? Can you sign in Japanese Sign Language?
        
        Monty Crisco 10 years ago
        
        I learned JSL a little bit, and could converse a bit with the kids. Not super hard, but is easier if you learn to spell out words in katakana/ hiragana (makes no difference in sign language) and it was really cool.
        I was there to teach kids who are deaf how to speak English. How do you like bureaucracies on the other side of the world?
        
        Heroic Mulatto 10 years ago
        
        How do you like bureaucracies on the other side of the world?
        
        Doesn't everyone love standing in line for two hours for a clerk who looks up records in a file cabinet?
5. Frank Frankelson 10 years ago
  
  Did you get airborne in your contract? If not its not that difficult to pick up later if you are going to an airborne assignment.
Fist of Etiquette 10 years ago

...the Harris County sheriff blamed "anti-police rhetoric." Authorities already have a suspect, who has been charged with capital murder.

Sounds like the sheriff should let that suspect go. He already knows who did it.
SugarFree 10 years ago

With a New Sequel About to Hit Shelves, Stieg Larsson's Partner Fights for His Legacy

There is something I find darkly hilarious about this whole saga. The intersection of writing, feminism, progressive politics, inheritance law and Sweden is very entertaining.
1. Just say Nikki 10 years ago
  
  But is there torture porn? I'm not reading it without torture porn.
  1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
    
    Worst you are.
    
    /Yoda
  2. SugarFree 10 years ago
    
    I'm sure reading it is a form of torture, but I am unsure if there is anal rape like the first novel.
2. Tonio 10 years ago
  
  Larsson's girlfriend was interviewed on NPR the other day. She didn't come across well. The money quote was how she turned down the Larsson's family's offer of $3 million because it was a pittance.
  
  But given that it's Sweden, I suspect that this would have disqualified her for the dole, but not given her a better standard of living than she enjoys on the dole. Anyone know?
  1. SugarFree 10 years ago
    
    And how much would she have gotten after taxes anyway?
    1. Tonio 10 years ago
      
      Not very much. I'd love to know if they calculated the amount required to achieve the scenario I outlined above.
    2. Tonio 10 years ago
      
      ....but since she's an actual communist it shouldn't matter to her, right? That money would go to pay for orphans, and old people, and Somali refugees.
      1. BearOdinson 10 years ago
        
        My monocle plant gets alot of good work out of orphans. They put in quite a few hours before they drop dead due to hunger. (I mean I let the rain drop into a bucket for water. I am not inhumane!) But my old people don't do shit. I whip them, threaten their families, but nothing gets those lazy bums out of their hospice beds.
        Does anyone have any luck with those Somalis?
3. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  According to her the only reason she didn't marry Larsson's was because Sweden would require them to put their residents on a public register, and they feared for their lives. Does anyone know if this excuse holds water?
  1. SugarFree 10 years ago
    
    It doesn't. They were together since 1974, and Larsson was a science fiction fanzine editor and graphic designer until he started working for the Searchlight Foundation in 1995.
    
    They didn't marry because omg! patriarchy.
    1. Illocust 10 years ago
      
      So basically she's getting a lesson in one of the major modern reasons for marriage. Why didn't this guy have her in his will at a minimum. Thirty years is long past the point they should have considered the possible death of one of them.
      1. Number.6 10 years ago
        
        So basically she's getting a lesson in one of the major modern reasons for marriage. Why didn't this guy have her in his will at a minimum. Thirty years is long past the point they should have considered the possible death of one of them.
        
        I think the word to use there should have been "inevitable".
      2. SugarFree 10 years ago
        
        He had last made out a will in 1977, leaving everything to the Communist Party. It was not properly witnesses and voided by the court.
        
        R C Dean 10 years ago
        
        As a good commie, why was he waiting until he died? Shouldn't he have been giving away his shit his whole life?
        
        db 10 years ago
        
        Because all good commies are loathesome hypocrites.
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Philadelphia's plans for hosting pope are far from heavenly for residents

Philadelphians have been harshly critical of city officials for implementing extreme security measures, including a ban on driving into the downtown area during the weekend, and for devising an overly complicated lottery system for train tickets ? and poorly communicating it all.

The decibel level has been so high ? with some on Twitter predicting a #popeapocalypse ? that Philadelphia Archbishop Charles Chaput set aside ethereal concerns to warn against "the temptation to focus on possible problems in security, logistics and transportation."

After recommending that residents lay in groceries and prescription medicines, Mayor Michael Nutter has been trying to allay anxieties with an online "Papal Playbook," which includes tips on everything from where to worship to how to handle stressed-out pets. Last week, the city launched an "I'll be There" campaign to persuade potential pilgrims that Philadelphia will still be open for business.
1. BearOdinson 10 years ago
  
  So where the hell are the American Atheists? Using taxpayer money to provide police protection. And of course we need to tell the Pope as he his motorcade is driving along the roads that "He didn't build that".
  1. Just say Nikki 10 years ago
    
    Planning ineffectual protests, as usual.
  2. Illocust 10 years ago
    
    How is this any different than hosting the Olympics. Except this looks like it might actually pay off monetarily (with you know the pope paying for his own accommodations minus crowd security)
    1. Just say Nikki 10 years ago
      
      Well, it's a lot shorter than it would be for the Olympics.
  3. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    I see this as a taxpayer issue, not an atheist issue. Doesn't matter who it is, they're paying to extra to have their city shut down for this.
    1. Illocust 10 years ago
      
      Did the city invite the guy, or did he just say I'm coming to your city on x date prepare for the crowds coming to see me? It makes a big difference.
    2. BearOdinson 10 years ago
      
      Actually, I do to. I generally don't care for the New Athiests. I don't care much for the Pope either. But he technically is a "head of state". But I just get pissed off when some "Top Man" comes to town and the city closes off whole sections.
2. WTF 10 years ago
  
  Mayor Nutter. How appropriate.
3. SugarFree 10 years ago
  
  If Heaven is so great, why are we spending so much money to keep Him from getting there?
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Labour leadership favourite Jeremy Corbyn said the assassination of 9/11 mastermind Osama Bin Laden was a 'tragedy'

Jeremy Corbyn described the assassination of Osama bin Laden as a 'tragedy upon a tragedy' that would make the world a more dangerous place.

In TV footage which emerged online for the first time last week, the Labour leadership frontrunner criticised the killing of the world's most wanted terrorist in a raid by US special forces.

He told Iranian national television, shortly after bin Laden was shot four years ago, that the 9/11 mastermind should not have received the 'death penalty', but should have been put on trial. Failure to do so, Mr Corbyn said, was 'a tragedy upon a tragedy', after the World Trade Center attacks, and the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.
1. BearOdinson 10 years ago
  
  I just recently became familiar with this "arsehole". And I truly weep for the once "Great" Britain if this fucking moron is elected PM.
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Federal Judge Orders IRS to Disclose WH Requests for Taxpayer Info

A federal judge on Friday ordered the Internal Revenue Service to reveal White House requests for taxpayers' private information, advancing a probe into whether administration officials targeted political opponents by revealing such information.

Judge Amy Berman Jackson of the U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia rejected the IRS's argument that a law designed to protect the confidentiality of such information protected the public disclosure of such communications with the White House.

The law, 26 U.S. Code ? 6103, was passed after the Watergate scandal to protect citizens from retribution by federal officials. Jackson scoffed at the administration's claims that the statute could be used to shield investigations into whether private tax information had been used in such a manner.
1. Lee G 10 years ago
  
  I won't hold my breath waiting for them to comply.
  1. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    I'm sure they will appeal.
2. WTF 10 years ago
  
  The server crashed, the requests were deleted, the hard drive was wiped, etc. etc. And nothing else will happen.
sarcasmic 10 years ago

Terrifying muzzle designed to keep dog owners safe at night will transform your pooch into a menacing WEREWOLF

Muzzle boasts large bloodied teeth and a snout that looks to be snarling
It also features a realistic nose and is made from both plastic and nylon
Recent picture of dog wearing muzzle when viral after appearing online

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....EWOLF.html

I want one for my pug. If it would fit on a pug.
1. straffinrun 10 years ago
  
  That'd make a nice belt for HIllary.
2. WTF 10 years ago
  
  You'll be safer at night if your Dobie is NOT wearing a muzzle.
Derpetologist 10 years ago

Spot the Not: torture & execution

1. nicknamed The Devil's Dancing Bear; he had a private torture chamber in his house

2. invented a death machine and became its first victim

3. invented the iron maiden after he got tired of other torture methods

4. His ancestry was 8 generations of executioners. He beheaded over 3000 people.

5. invented a torture machine that was shaped like his wife

6. invented a death machine to discredit a business rival
1. sarcasmic 10 years ago
  
  I'ma go wit 5.
2. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
  
  6.
3. Citizen X 10 years ago
  
  Number 6 is Thomas Edison - he invented the electric chair to prove how dangerous Nicola Tesla's alternating current circuitry was.
  1. Citizen X 10 years ago
    
    Or, possibly, he just took credit from one of his flunkies for inventing the electric chair, as was his m.o. Either way.
  2. sarcasmic 10 years ago
    
    Didn't he debut it by killing an elephant?
    
    *longs for the days when this actually was a free country*
    1. Lee G 10 years ago
      
      Yes. He was a bit of a dick.
    2. Tonio 10 years ago
      
      He had a road show thingy where the Edison people would show up in a town, grab a stray dog, and publicly electrocute it to show the dangers of alternating current. Asshole.
      1. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
        
        That is really kind of dickish...
    3. MJGreen - Docile Citizen 10 years ago
      
      Aww, Topsy...
4. tarran 10 years ago
  
  I'm going to go with 3.
  
  2 and 6 are true. In fact the guy behind 6 is a household name.
5. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  1 was the guillotine right? I know that 1 is true, I'm just not certain of the execution method.
6. Derpetologist 10 years ago
  
  3 is the Not. There is no evidence that the iron maiden was used or even existed in medieval times. All the versions that exist today are reconstructions.
  
  The rest in order are Bishop Bonner, Perillos, Johann Reichart, King Nabis, and Edison.
  
  The Apega of Nabis, also known as the Iron Apega, was described by Polybius as an ancient torture device similar to the iron maiden. It was invented by Nabis, a king who ruled Sparta as a tyrant from 207 to 192 BC.
  
  The mechanical Apega, according to Polybius, was a machine, a well-executed replica or duplicate of the real wife of Nabis, and was used by Nabis to collect money from unwilling Spartan citizens. Those who didn't give money were sent to deal with his wife. This was the replica, dressed in expensive clothing, with arms outstretched. When the drunken visitors hugged her, this triggered the arms to close. The device's arms, hands, and breasts were covered with iron nails, and the arms were capable of crushing the body of its victim. Nabis would control the machine through hidden switches and devices, until the victim agreed to pay a tribute or to the point of death.
  
  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apega_of_Nabis
Grand Moff Serious Man 10 years ago

Jeb Bush is now polling below Ben Carson in the Republican presidential contest. Scott Walker, meanwhile, says a a wall along the U.S. border with Canada is a "legitimate" idea.

William Shatner exempted, of course.
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Illinois lottery winners have to wait for payout due to budget impasse

After years of struggling financially, Susan Rick thought things were looking up when her boyfriend won $250,000 from the Illinois Lottery last month. She could stop working seven days a week, maybe fix up the house and take a trip to Minnesota to visit her daughter.

But because Illinois lawmakers have not passed a budget, she and her boyfriend, Danny Chasteen, got an IOU from the lottery instead.

"For the first time, we were finally gonna get a break," said Rick, who lives in Oglesby. "And now the Illinois Lottery has kind of messed everything up."
1. PM 10 years ago
  
  At least when the mob ran the numbers game you got your payout.
2. Tonio 10 years ago
  
  Why it's just like 1984 where the only lottery prized anyone actually won were inconsequential.
3. BearOdinson 10 years ago
  
  That's funny considering they always tell us how the lottery makes money for the state.
4. SFC B 10 years ago
  
  I'm going to go out on a limb here and assume that a $250,000 pay out is not going to be the life-altering windfall that Ms. Rick seems to think it will be.
Jordan 10 years ago

After a deputy was shot and killed in Houston, the Harris County sheriff blamed "anti-police rhetoric." Authorities already have a suspect, who has been charged with capital murder.

Wasn't Harris County the department that unapologetically finger-banged a woman on the side of the highway because a deputy "smelled marijuana"?
1. SIV 10 years ago
  
  I think it was Texas Highway Patrol.
2. SugarFree 10 years ago
  
  Yup.
  
  The incident happened during a traffic stop in June in Harris County. A male sheriff's deputy pulled Corley over and then searched her car after saying he smelled marijuana in it, she said.
  
  After finding nothing, she said, he called a female officer out to search Corley.
  
  "They took me around to the side of my car, and she tells me, 'Pull your pants down,'" Corley told CNN.
  
  Corley, who was handcuffed, said she told the female deputy that she didn't have any underwear on.
  
  The female deputy replied that it didn't matter, pulled Corley's pants down and then told her to bend over, Corley told CNN.
  
  "I bent over and she proceeded to stick her fingers in me, and I popped up immediately and I told her, 'No! What are you doing? You can't do that to me,' she said.
  
  And all without a warrant.
  1. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
    
    It's all in the rhetoric.
    
    I find it interesting a police chief doesn't see how shit like that erodes the public trust.
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Valrico woman says she robbed banks to pay for daughter's graduation party

A woman explained in court records this week why she robbed three Brandon banks within 30 minutes in May, netting more than $6,000.

She wanted to throw her daughter a graduation party.

That, and the rent was late.
1. PM 10 years ago
  
  netting more than $6,000
  
  Considering the enhanced penalties, including the possibility of club Fed, for bank robbery, I don't understand why the fuck anybody does it for such piddly amounts anymore. If you aren't masterminding a Hollywood plan whereby you make off with an entire safe full of diamonds or picking off the armored car on its last stop of the day, don't bother. Go knock over the 7-11 if you want some quick petty cash.
  1. Grand Moff Serious Man 10 years ago
    
    Banks are insured up the ass and the teller's who work there and hate their jobs are more than happy to give you the contents of the drawers.
    
    On the other hand, the 7-11 clerk who came from Pakistan with nothing might actually kill you if you try to rob his store.
    
    Of course both are stupid things to do that with high fail rates but I actually think banks are softer targets as long as you don't stupidly try to get into the impregnable vault or safety deposit box.
    1. PM 10 years ago
      
      That's probably true, actually. Still though, it's not like back in the Willie Sutton days where you can make a big score robbing a bank these days, but the penalties from that era are still with us. The risk/reward ratio is out of whack.
      1. Illocust 10 years ago
        
        If you one and done the bank robbery, odds are you will never get caught. It's the guys that can't stop with just one that end up get the bad end of the risk/reward stick. High school girls have robbed banks with a tube of lipstick and a note before, and they've never been caught because they stopped while they were ahead.
        
        PM 10 years ago
        
        High school girls have robbed banks with a tube of lipstick and a note before, and they've never been caught because they stopped while they were ahead.
        
        Preet Bharara would like a word with you...
        
        Illocust 10 years ago
        
        Who is Preet Bharara?
        
        Lee G 10 years ago
        
        A guy who doesn't like woodchippers
        
        PM 10 years ago
        
        We'll let it slide this time, but you need to brush up on your Reason memes
        
        http://reason.com/blog/2015/06.....les-speech
        
        Illocust 10 years ago
        
        I get woodchippers. I just don't keep track of peoples names. I have enough trouble not calling the guys at work old guy number one and two.
        
        Pope Jimbo 10 years ago
        
        In 1981 in Vergas, MN two guys tried to rob the local bank. They wore their blaze orange hunting gear and brought in rifles. The robbery went well, but when they left the bank their getaway vehicle was gone.
        
        They had stolen a pickup truck the day before for the robbery. While they were in the bank, the owner happened to pass by and saw his stolen truck sitting there running. So he got in and drove it home.
        
        The robbers were forced to try to flee on foot (while wearing blaze orange) and didn't get very far.
        
        They ended up on my dad's caseload (he was a PO) and he said that if they hadn't had their truck stolen he was pretty sure they would have gotten away with it. They had planned to use the loot to pay for their tuition at Moorhead State. Like Illocust said, it was a one and done deal.
        
        Hyperion 10 years ago
        
        Umm... aren't you supposed to leave someone in the running vehicle? I think that person is known as the get away driver? Or is that just in movies?
        
        PM 10 years ago
        
        Not everyone can afford a driver, check your privilege shitlord.
  2. Zeb 10 years ago
    
    From what I can gather, robbing banks isn't too hard to do or get away with. A fact which banks and police make some effort to hide.
    1. Just say Nikki 10 years ago
      
      Based on Chicago scanner traffic, it happens kind of a lot.
      1. Grand Moff Serious Man 10 years ago
        
        My girlfriend applied for a job at a bank in Tucson once. It went well but then the manager told her that their bank gets robbed at least once every few months or so.
        
        She did not take the job.
    2. Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
      
      You just never go for the vault.
    3. Tonio 10 years ago
      
      But with a holdup you only get what's in the teller's drawer, so a few thousand. Professional jobs where they go for the vault are much rarer.
      1. Zeb 10 years ago
        
        For sure. I'm thinking of petty crooks deciding to get a little more ambitious.
        
        I actually drove past a bank that had just been robbed the other day.
  3. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    You don't get Club Fed (minimum security) for armed robbery. But, yeah, bank robbery is a federal bust, which doesn't preclude the state for also trying her for her actions under state law.
    1. Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
      
      Under every teller station and desk there is a "hold-up alarm," which is easily triggered by an employee. If there is not a cop in the general area it is pretty easy for the bank robbers to get away.
Irish ?s ESB 10 years ago

Barack Obama, lowerer of oceans, saver of planets, renamer of mountains.
1. straffinrun 10 years ago
  
  So 'Denali' means, 'High' or 'Tall'. They respected it so much that they spent two seconds thinking about what to name it.
  1. Zeb 10 years ago
    
    What does McKinley mean? Probably something else boring and irrelevant.
    
    I think the change is good, mostly because that's what most people call it anyway, and also because there is too much stuff named after presidents.
    1. straffinrun 10 years ago
      
      Don't get me wrong. McKinley sucks, too. The only thing with a politician's name on it should be colostomy bags.
    2. Jerryskids 10 years ago
      
      mostly because that's what most people call it anyway
      
      And when enough people call any white bread spread 'mayonnaise' we can change the definition of mayonnaise, too. But not until then.
  2. The Last American Hero 10 years ago
    
    +1 Mediterranean Sea
    1. Zeb 10 years ago
      
      An awful lot of geographic features have simple descriptive names. Who's the genius who came up with "Rocky Mountains"?
      
      At least when it's in another language, it sounds interesting.
      1. Florida Man 10 years ago
        
        That John Denver is full of shit.
        /Lloyd Christmas
      2. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
        
        Shaggy.
        
        'Like, this mountain is rocky, man!'
        
        /Scooby giggle.
      3. Rhywun 10 years ago
        
        I like 'Shanghai' - it means "On the sea".
        
        Heroic Mulatto 10 years ago
        
        Yeah...to a native, Chinese city names must sound so boring.
        
        Beijing - Northern Capital
        Nanjing - Southern Capital
        Chengdu - Became [the] Capital
        Guangzhou - Guang County
        Shenzhen - Deep Drainage Ditch
        
        Number.6 10 years ago
        
        What does "Ordos" translate to?
        
        straffinrun 10 years ago
        
        Fukushima - Good Fortune Island
      4. Timon 19 10 years ago
        
        Sahara Desert.
2. Mrs. Lemuel Struthers 10 years ago
  
  The only real Denali
sarcasmic 10 years ago

Hat's the way to do it! Victoria Justice and boyfriend Pierson Fod? rock their headgear as they jet into Los Angeles

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs.....n-Fod.html
I am so in lust with her. Damn.
1. Rhywun 10 years ago
  
  And he just looks like a greasy douchebag. I think she can do better.
Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago

From NYT comments about McKinley/Denali:

W Smith NYC 2 hours ago

"Obama has really come into his own as President since the 2014 midterm elections. He's being himself, speaking more freely, and doing things that all of us who voted for him back in 2008 had hoped he had been doing from the beginning.
Also, the name Denali is just sublimely beautiful and appropriate for such an awe-inspiring peak and environ."

He's like an onion that needs to be peeled and then fried in garlic.

Also a few Marxist references to over turning colonialism and such.

It's all in the name apparently.
1. John 10 years ago
  
  Who cares if the world economy is collapsing and Iran is about to get the bomb. Obama renamed Mount McKinley and that is what really matters.
  
  These people are fucking beyond parody.
  1. sarcasmic 10 years ago
    
    John, meet Chicken Little. Chicken Little, meet John.
    1. John 10 years ago
      
      Hey, what is a few trillion dollars in Chinese equity and nukes in the hands of Islamic lunatics between friends?
      1. sarcasmic 10 years ago
        
        The economy is always on the verge of collapse and Iran has been about to get the bomb for more than twenty years. I'm not worried.
        
        John 10 years ago
        
        No its not. The world learned nothing from 08 and the central bankers did nothing but reinflate the asset bubbles.
        
        sarcasmic 10 years ago
        
        "The future's uncertain and the end is always near."
        
        I say, let it roll.
        
        CatoTheChipper 10 years ago
        
        Chicken Little has been concerned about an Iranian Bomb ever since the Ford Administration. I've heard politicians -- both DC and Middle East -- expressing concern about Iran's nuclear ambitions since the mid-1970s.
2. Rhywun 10 years ago
  
  the name Denali is just sublimely beautiful
  
  Looks for a bunch of kids named 'Denali' in the next few years.
Longtorso, Johnny 10 years ago

Government fuels next housing collapse with unstable mortgages
...Since Fannie and Freddie guarantee 90% of US mortgages, private lenders will match their weaker standards. Many of these weak loans will, in turn, be securitized and traded on Wall Street....

...Starting in 2000, HUD announced it was jacking up the quotas for low-income borrowers to 50% in the interest of diversity, meaning Fannie and Freddie had to find a non-prime loan for every prime loan it acquired. HUD explained it wanted Fannie and Freddie to "become more comfortable with subprime lending."...

...In 1992, neither Fannie nor Freddie had any loans with down payments under 5%, Wallison notes. But by 2007, on the eve of the crisis, 26% of Fannie's loans and 19% of Freddie's had down payments that low....

...From 1997-2007, Fannie and Freddie acquired a combined $1.5 trillion in loans with subprime credit scores, and another $2.2 trillion in subprime securities....

...A 2006 Fannie staff memo is eye-opening. "Everybody understood that we were now buying loans that we would have previously rejected but our mandate was to serve low-income borrowers," it said.
"So that's what we did."...
1. Longtorso, Johnny 10 years ago
  
  Airing the depth of troubles at Fannie Mae
  In 2004, before Fannie Mae pushed into riskier loans, the Department of Housing and Urban Development suggested the definitions were becoming fuzzy.
  
  "As the GSE's become more comfortable with subprime lending, the line between what today is considered a subprime loan versus a prime loan will likely deteriorate, making expansion by the GSE's look more like an increase in the prime market," the housing department said in a November 2004 report.
  1. some guy 10 years ago
    
    WHAT YEAR IS IT!?
    
    It's 2003 again isn't it? Can we at least not do a war in the Middle East this time around?
    1. Illocust 10 years ago
      
      Nope, we are going to invade ISIS come next president, or maybe even sooner if Obama gets really worried about his legacy.
    2. R C Dean 10 years ago
      
      More like 2006 or so, economically, IMO.
Longtorso, Johnny 10 years ago

The Real Winner Of Obama's 'War On Coal': George Soros
The real winner of President Barack Obama's so-called "war on coal" isn't the EPA, nor is it the natural gas industry. It's liberal billionaire George Soros.

Last week, Obama's EPA announced sweeping regulations for U.S. power plants, forcing them to drastically reduce carbon dioxide emissions 32 percent by 2030. The news sent shockwaves through the coal industry, sending stocks tumbling and forcing the industry's two biggest players to consider bankruptcy filings.

That's where liberal billionaire Soros steps in. In the days after the Clean Power Plan was announced, Soros bought more than 1 million shares of Peabody Energy and 553,200 shares of Arch Coal ? the country's two biggest publicly-traded coal companies.

Both Peabody and Arch Coal "have seen their market values plummet" due to "competition from cheap natural gas, new environmental regulations and a slowing export market," according to SNL Financial. Soros was able to pick up these coal stocks on the cheap, in part, due to Obama administration regulations targeting coal-fired power plants and coal mines....
1. John 10 years ago
  
  All of those regs are going to either die in court or be reversed by the next administration. We are not going to shut the lights out no matter how much the Greens hope we do. Soros and Obama both know that and know that those stocks are going to go back up when that happens. The entire thing is nothing but a political stunt and a payoff to Obama's cronies.
  1. Illocust 10 years ago
    
    Can we at least shut the lights out for New York and California? They support getting back to nature.
    1. John 10 years ago
      
      They might shut the lights off in those places. Understand, the will get turned back on.
2. The Last American Hero 10 years ago
  
  If Soros was a real mastermind, he would have bought them before the announcement, not the day after.
  1. John 10 years ago
    
    No. He knows the regs are never going to stick and those stocks are going to go back up. So, he bought them the day after the announcement when they were at their lowest point. He did the same thing as buying Martha Stewart stock the day after she was convicted.
Pompey 10 years ago

President Obama announced he would order Mt. McKinley in Alaska to revert to its Eskimo name Denali, ahead of a trip he is planning to the state next month.

Signal observed. All hail Obama.
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

The secret history of Y'all: The murky origins of a legendary Southern slang word
The phrase "y'all" might not simply be the shortened form of "you all" ? but something far more complex

So it is possible that "y'all" emerged from both of these origins, with the similarities in sound and function making the word a popular choice for both populations to use. There would have been much interaction between the two in the American South, and both Montgomery and Lipski point to Appalachia specifically as an area of close contact. Unlike the highly stratified culture of Southern plantation life, the more rural environment of Appalachia cultivated crossover between black and white communities. This hypothesis rests on how closely linked Southern and African-American vernacular dialects were in the early South, a question that scholars are still exploring.

Admittedly, "y'all" is less of a cultural liability now than it has been in the past, despite autocorrect's tyranny against it. In general, we seem to be more interested (and thus, perhaps, more forgiving?) regarding regional dialects, particularly Southern English.
1. PM 10 years ago
  
  This hypothesis rests on how closely linked Southern and African-American vernacular dialects were in the early South
  
  Uhhh, you mean because most of the black people in the country at the time picked up English from... wait for it... southern whites on plantations? Jesus fuck, this is some kind of revelation?
2. Fist of Etiquette 10 years ago
  
  It shows the need for a different word for second person singular and plural personal pronouns.
  1. Don'tTreadOnMeChipper 10 years ago
    
    All y'all?
3. Tonio 10 years ago
  
  the more rural environment of Appalachia cultivated crossover between black and white communities
  
  Um, except that slavery was not that common in the Southern Uplands (Appalachia). Slavery was much more common in coastal plain and piedmont areas where tobacco and cotton were farmed. Those upland farms were generally smaller, less labor-intensive operations such as horse farms and orchard fruits.
Free Society 10 years ago

President Obama announced he would order Mt. McKinley in Alaska to revert to its Eskimo name Denali, ahead of a trip he is planning to the state next month.

"From this day forth, all the toilets in the kingdom shall be known as...Baracks!"
1. Lord Humungus 10 years ago
  
  Esposito: From this day on, the official language of San Marcos will be Swedish. Silence! In addition to that, all citizens will be required to change their underwear every half-hour. Underwear will be worn on the outside so we can check. Furthermore, all children under 16 years old are now... 16 years old!
  
  Fielding Mellish: What's the Spanish word for straitjacket?
sarcasmic 10 years ago

Quasar powered by TWO monster black holes spotted: Whirling binary system reveals clues about how galaxies merge

Markarian 231 (Mrk 231), the nearest galaxy to Earth that hosts a quasar
It is powered by two black holes 'furiously whirling' around each other
Finding suggests quasars may commonly host two central black holes
Black-hole duo generates enough energy to make core of the host galaxy outshine the glow of the galaxy's population of billions of stars

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sci.....merge.html

Is that like a Muse song or something?
1. SugarFree 10 years ago
  
  It is powered by two black holes 'furiously whirling' around each other.
  
  I don't think I can be blamed for this one.
  1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
    
    Yet...
  2. Fist of Etiquette 10 years ago
    
    Write for us something involving an giant double-ended space dildo.
2. BigT 10 years ago
  
  You forgot to include a link to the image.
Grand Moff Serious Man 10 years ago

Neurologist Oliver Sacks died this weekend. So did Wes Craven, the horror filmmaker.

Done-in by the same serial killer that keeps killing the world's oldest person?
Mike M. 10 years ago

The Federal Reserve is likely to raise interest rates by the end of the year, despite pressure by some observers to delay the move because of volatility in foreign markets.

See "The Boy Who Cried Wolf" by Aesop.
Derpetologist 10 years ago

I was thinking the other day about all the compound words formed by 2 nouns:

mouthpiece, girlfriend, fireplace, battlefield, windmill, catfish, bedroom, lighthouse, tombstone, rainbow, homeland...
1. Lee G 10 years ago
  
  You should drink more.
  1. PM 10 years ago
    
    cocktail...
    1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
      
      *applause*
    2. Slammer 10 years ago
      
      narrowgaze
  2. Derpetologist 10 years ago
    
    Yesterday, I had:
    
    1. an orange-flavored IPA called A Hopwork Orange
    
    2. Old Chub Scotch Ale
    
    3. Blue Mountain Lager
    
    4. Southern Tier 2X Rye
    
    The Old Chub was the best. I don't normally like Scotch ales. Innis & Gunn tastes like Jack Daniels and pool water.
    1. sarcasmic 10 years ago
      
      I tried a shandy yesterday. It was vile.
      1. Number.6 10 years ago
        
        You need a *lightly hopped* beer, and a real limit on the amount of sprite.
        
        Otherwise - yeah - gross.
2. Lord Humungus 10 years ago
  
  I think about women, stereos, cars, and... uh, all the wonderful people on this site.
3. sarcasmic 10 years ago
  
  handjob, fistfuck, buttplug...
  1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
    
    What are you doing, stepping on SugarFree's turf?
  2. BigT 10 years ago
    
    cocksucker, motherfucker, fatherraper, asshole, fuckbuddy
4. Free Society 10 years ago
  
  If you were thinking of the compound words in German you'd be pondering a bit longer. German has a nifty feature where basically any two nouns could in theory be joined together. Which works well to make German words seem more intimidating than they really are.
  
  One of my favorites is the word for 'speed limit'; Geschwindigkeitsbegrenzung
  1. sarcasmic 10 years ago
    
    They also capitalize all their nouns, which is something I find to be, well, odd.
    1. Free Society 10 years ago
      
      It is odd. But it did make it easier to read German as a novice methinks.
  2. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    any two nouns
    
    LOL. It's much worse than that, Freebie. Any combination of two or more nouns.
  3. In League with the Dark Ones 10 years ago
    
    Ever ridden on the Donaudampfschiffahrtsgesellschaft?
5. Slammer 10 years ago
  
  blowjob
6. Tonio 10 years ago
  
  And I'm guessing that most of those are older, anglo-saxon words. While old english did retain some of the german love for compound nouns, we seem to have an unspoken (!) two-word limit on that.
7. Jerryskids 10 years ago
  
  Doesn't the compounding tend to make the first noun an adjective describing the second noun?
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

We're now back to being at least as polarized as ever: Why the gun control tipping point hasn't happened yet
A cognitive psychologist talks about why changing minds on guns, even after public shootings, is so hard

It is polarized, and it's stayed polarized despite the series of very public, gruesome mass murders, going back to the Columbine massacre. After the massacre in Newtown, there was increased support for gun control, but it essentially wore off. And we're now back to being at least as polarized as ever.

Part of it has to do with the complexity. Presumably the problem is death by gun. But in every instance, it's a multi-causal situation, it's a nexus of a lethal weapon in the hands of someone who is disturbed in some way, out of control at the same time. So when you want to point to causes, depending on where you are coming in, you'll look at different aspects. And the deepest rational divide on the issue is the contrast between the gun as a threat ? in the wrong hands ? and the gun as a defense. So the pro-gun side of the debate emphasizes the gun's role as protection.
1. Irish ?s ESB 10 years ago
  
  They're having a rough time acknowledging public opinion is actually moving against them, aren't they?
2. SugarFree 10 years ago
  
  "If only more would die, the bodies would finally be stacked high enough to really get something done."
3. John 10 years ago
  
  Part of it has to do with the complexity. Presumably the problem is death by gun. But in every instance, it's a multi-causal situation, it's a nexus of a lethal weapon in the hands of someone who is disturbed in some way, out of control at the same time. So when you want to point to causes, depending on where you are coming in, you'll look at different aspects.
  
  Which is another way of saying that the problem is guns are not the entirety of the problem and controlling them not to solution. Yet, this guy writes that without a hint of irony in an article about how we need more gun control.
  1. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
    
    Listen, and understand. That gun-grabber is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, EVER, until you are disarmed and helpless against the government.
    
    That is their only agenda. Nothing else matters. That is all.
4. Zeb 10 years ago
  
  Maybe because people who don't want to ban guns have actually thought about things for 2 seconds and know that mass killings are something that can and do happen and have already taken that into account?
  Why the fuck would you expect someone to change their mind after a shooting? Do they really think that people haven't considered that possibility before?
5. OldMexican 10 years ago
  
  Part of it has to do with the complexity.
  
  Or maybe it is the fact people are less fooled by the facile and emotion-laden arguments against gun ownership while their skepticism of the good intentions behind anti-gun legislation continues to grow.
6. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  Too many people openly want guns completely banned. It's hard to convince folks you just want small regulations when three of your buddies were just yesterday screaming about how we are the only modern country that allows private gun ownership.
GroundTruth 10 years ago

Scott Walker, meanwhile, says a a wall along the U.S. border with Canada is a "legitimate" idea.

Sad how far we've come. For the US's 200th anniversary, the people of Canada gave us a commemorative book ("Between Friends / Entre Amis") celebrating the longest open border in the world.

http://www.fireflybooks.com/in.....entre-amis

For our 250th anniversary, we're going to give them a wall?
1. Fist of Etiquette 10 years ago
  
  America's become an eyesore anyway. We'd be doing them a favor.
  1. GroundTruth 10 years ago
    
    Funny thing is, the last time I was up there, I did a tour of Fort Henry in ON and they were still going on about the Americans plans to invade during the war of 1812.
    1. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
      
      1812 inexplicably takes up a lot of space in our discourse.
Free Society 10 years ago

After a deputy was shot and killed in Houston, the Harris County sheriff blamed "anti-police rhetoric." Authorities already have a suspect, who has been charged with capital murder.

You know who else shot the deputy, but he did not shoot the Sheriff? wait...
1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
  
  Marley...no, wait, Clapton!?
  1. Free Society 10 years ago
    
    No Clapton no cry.
    1. PM 10 years ago
      
      What's the difference between a kilo of cocaine and a toddler?
      
      Eric Clapton wouldn't let a kilo of cocaine fall out of a window.
      
      I'll be here all week!
      1. Free Society 10 years ago
        
        And probably the week after that.
John 10 years ago

http://pjmedia.com/instapundit/213474/

One of the great lies of this century is that New Orleans flooded because the levies were overtopped by Katrina. That is not what happened. The brunt of Katrina missed New Orleans and hit Mississippi. In New Orleans, Katrina was no worse than a Cat 1 hurricane. And the levies held through the storm. The city looked to be okay when the storm ended. Then, the levies failed and flooded the city. New Orleans flooded because the levies were defective. It wasn't FEMA's fault. It was the Corps of Engineers and the crooked Louisiana politicians who put pork over safety and built defect levies that flooded New Orleans. In one sense, Katrina may have saved lives by having the levies fail when the city was largely evacuated. They were going to fail at some point and it would have killed a lot more people if they had failed when the city had not been evacuated.
1. Raven Nation 10 years ago
  
  Pfft, everyone knows the levees failed because Bush ordered them blown up.
2. Lee G 10 years ago
  
  The Corps is a political entity that works at the beck and call of Congress. To say that they are rife with cronyism would be an understatement.
  1. Lee G 10 years ago
    
    The interesting thing is that the Corps now has an environmentalist agenda as well. They've been known to block highway projects over a few acres of wetlands. They're like a dysfunctional version of the EPA with bulldozers.
  2. John 10 years ago
    
    The worse part is how the media are such accomplices to it. The failure of those levies and the corruption associated with it should have been one of the great stories of the last fifty years. Instead of reporting the truth and getting a great story, they lied because it suited their political agenda. Journalists are scum.
    1. Lee G 10 years ago
      
      That would take some work. Outrage and finger pointing is much easier and more fun.
    2. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
      
      IIRC, I remember it being reported in a special investigation after the fact that the CoE was at fault for defective construction.
      
      Story didn't really get much traction after the fact, though...
3. some guy 10 years ago
  
  In one sense, Katrina may have saved lives by having the levies fail when the city was largely evacuated. They were going to fail at some point and it would have killed a lot more people if they had failed when the city had not been evacuated.
  
  I don't buy it. Things are much more likely to fail during extreme stress. Most likely those levies were going to fail during a storm, when people had been evacuated.
  
  Either way, though, the political corruption was the ultimate cause. At least the replacement levies should be less defective since, presumably, there was more attention being paid to them during construction. One would hope, at least...
  1. John 10 years ago
    
    Sure they are more likely to fail then but the levies were defective. They were going to fail. Were they likely to fail during a hurricane? Sure, but interestingly they didn't fail until after Katrina had past. The point is they could have failed at any time and had they failed when the city was full of people it would have likely killed tens of thousands.
4. 0x90 10 years ago
  
  Cryin' won't help you, prayin' won't do you no good...
5. BigT 10 years ago
  
  The levees had too much earth and not enough led.
6. Jerryskids 10 years ago
  
  The Corps wanted to put floodgates and channels to control the water going into Lake Pontchartrain - in 1965 after Hurricane Betsy hit New Orleans. The locals and the environmentalists stopped them. Interestingly, after Katrina the Corps went ahead and built the floodgates and I don't recall hearing shit about the lawsuits to stop them then. I would say it was far more the locals than the Corps at fault - New Orleans is a terribly shitty location for a city (as are most cities that served as ports back in the day when everything had to be shipped by water) but if you're going to build a city at the bottom of a bowl, it's better to divert water before it ever reaches the lip of the bowl rather than try to build a taller and stronger lip. But if you've got waterfront property threatened by the Corps and their plans for flood control, you argue for bigger lips.
Grand Moff Serious Man 10 years ago

My Daughter Was Killed By Gun Violence, I Will Do Anything to Stop It

Last Wednesday, my daughter Alison was brutally struck down in the prime of her life by a deranged gunman. Since then, I have stated in numerous interviews with local, national and international media that I plan to make my life's work trying to implement effective and reasonable safeguards against this happening again.

Which have absolutely nothing to do with how her killer got his gun. He passed a background check.

In recent years we have witnessed similar tragedies unfold on TV: the shooting of a congresswoman in Arizona, the massacre of schoolchildren in Connecticut and of churchgoers in South Carolina. We have to ask ourselves: What do we need to do to stop this insanity?

In my case, the answer is: "Whatever it takes."

That leaves a lot of frightening courses of action on the table, doesn't it?
1. John 10 years ago
  
  He could have bought her a gun and got her a CC permit. Had she been armed, she would have had a chance.
  1. sarcasmic 10 years ago
    
    How does being armed help you when someone shoots you in the back at point blank range?
    1. John 10 years ago
      
      He didn't shoot her in the back. She saw him and reacted in horror before he shot. Could she have been quick enough to shot him first? Probably not, but at least she would have had a chance, which is better than what she had.
      1. sarcasmic 10 years ago
        
        From what I saw he stood there with his gun pointed at them for most of a minute before opening fire. They didn't notice him until after he started shooting. They only had a chance to recoil in horror because he missed his first couple of shots. They had no chance at all. Even if she was holding a gun instead of a microphone she would have had no chance. Sorry.
      2. Free Society 10 years ago
        
        She reacted in horror to being shot. When you look at both films, there's just no way way she wasn't hit on the first shot. Though I think it hit under her front right shoulder, not her back.
      3. Irish ?s ESB 10 years ago
        
        John, if you watch the video there was clearly nothing she could have done. The first time she noticed he was there was after he shot her in the side. It was a total ambush of the kind having a gun wouldn't have prevented.
        
        Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
        
        She would have been okay if she was like Wild Bill Hickcok, and quick drew her ivory-handled revolver that she wore on her gun belt.
        
        John 10 years ago
        
        Again, slim is better than none. I am not saying she had a good chance just some chance.
        
        Monty Crisco 10 years ago
        
        Fact of the matter is that if someone wants to ambush and kill YOU specifically, they are going to pick the time and place most advantageous to them and least advantageous to you.
        
        Most incidents of gun violence/ self-defense are NOT quickdraw competitions.
        
        She had the deck REALLY stacked against her - but if he had used a knife the result would have been the same.
        
        Zaytsev 10 years ago
        
        Fact of the matter is that if someone wants to ambush and kill YOU specifically, they are going to pick the time and place most advantageous to them and least advantageous to you.
        
        Yes, but that's not what he did. He wanted to kill her and the cameraman live on TV. If it was a pure ambush he would have done so when she was alone, most likely when she was walking to or from he car.
        
        CJR 10 years ago
        
        Oddly, if whats-his-name had gone for the old tried and true ambush in the parking lot, Alison might have had a better chance.
        
        Asshole picked the time and place for his hit really well. All of his victims were necessarily focused on each other, rather than on the outside world.
        
        Zaytsev 10 years ago
        
        She ran after being hit twice and the killer pursued her to finish her off. She could have returned fire at that point. Or pulling out a gun would have likely made him break off the attack. It's repeatedly been the case that fantasy killers , like Vester, flee at the first sign of armed resistance.
    2. some guy 10 years ago
      
      Cameraman was shot I the back. The reporter and the interviewee were looking at the guy as he walked up and seemed to have at least a moment to try to turn and run away.
    3. 0x90 10 years ago
      
      This is why I always wear a PWND (Personal Weapon of Nuclear Destruction) hooked to a dead-man switch.
      1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
        
        *jots down note to never harm 0x90*
      2. R C Dean 10 years ago
        
        +1 Raven.
  2. Grand Moff Serious Man 10 years ago
    
    I agree more people CCing is a good thing but in this case it really wouldn't have made a difference.
    
    If you watch the video it was clearly an ambush made while she was talking to someone on live television. I don't see a way she could have defended herself so I don't think that's the best point to make on this particular subject.
  3. Drake 10 years ago
    
    No she probably wouldn't have had a chance. She never saw it coming because giving a TV interview is a circumstance where you cannot really have situational awareness. He could have killed her with an ax just as easily.
2. Drake 10 years ago
  
  Condolences for the loss of your daughter.
  
  Now fuck off.
  1. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    ^This.
3. Jordan 10 years ago
  
  Fuck off, slaver.
4. PM 10 years ago
  
  I posted this in another thread earlier, but it's worth repeating:
  
  Andy Parker, the father of murdered WDBJ journalist Alison Parker, renewed his call Friday for politicians to enact "reasonable" gun control measures. He said the cause was so important to him that he was willing to become an advocate even if it puts his life in danger.
  
  ...
  
  He added that he doesn't own a gun but he may buy one to protect himself. Although he hasn't received any threats yet, he said he doesn't want to "take any chances."
  
  "I don't own a gun. We don't have a gun in our family," Parker said. "I'm probably going to have to get one. Sad to say, but I -- unfortunately, that's just the world we live in."
  
  He's gotta arm himself against the imagined, hypothetical future threats from the VRWC, you understand.
  1. Irish ?s ESB 10 years ago
    
    So is he worried he'll be murdered by pro-gun activists? Was he born this paranoid, or was the paranoia the result of long term drug abuse?
  2. Raven Nation 10 years ago
    
    Ugh, I am so sick of people using the word "reasonable" in public policy debates. It's become one of the most manipulative expressions out there.
    1. PM 10 years ago
      
      From the same article:
      
      "I want to go to the Virginia legislature, and I want them to look me in the eye and tell me why can't we have a reasonable proposal, any reasonable background check. You know, the things that common-sense dictates. I want them to look me in the eye and tell me why they don't want to support that."
      1. Free Society 10 years ago
        
        Reasonable is whatever the Democrat supports.
        
        Just say Nikki 10 years ago
        
        Reasonable is whatever the Democrat supports.
        
        Federal donation records suggest Andy Parker was a Republican, or at least supported a couple of them.
        
        Warty 10 years ago
        
        I believe he ran as a Democrat in the past.
        
        Just say Nikki 10 years ago
        
        Yeah, that's a bit weird. He also gave $5k to a Romney PAC.
        
        Just say Nikki 10 years ago
        
        More like $10k.
        
        Citizen X 10 years ago
        
        Sounds pretty typical for a Virginian. We're all purple down here.
        
        Tonio 10 years ago
        
        "Common sense" is also a red flag. "I don't have an actual argument on the merits but I'm going to pretend that I do and that my argument is unassailable."
        
        Warty 10 years ago
        
        "I'm going to insult your morals and call you a monster, and you can't say anything about it because I have the high ground."
      2. Lee G 10 years ago
        
        ugh, that reads like a DU post
  3. Free Society 10 years ago
    
    So guns are okay for he but not for thee? There seems to be a lot of overlap between the 'stupid' and 'unprincipled' categories of people.
    1. sarcasmic 10 years ago
      
      Throw in a good helping of irony in that he's getting a gun for self defense while blasting anyone who gets a gun for self defense.
      1. Free Society 10 years ago
        
        It's astonishing he doesn't see the irony. Or he does and doesn't care.
        
        Don'tTreadOnMeChipper 10 years ago
        
        Apparently he wants to add a question to the ATF application that says,"Do you plan to use this gun for self defense or to murder someone in cold blood?". That'll fixit!!!!
        
        Number.6 10 years ago
        
        Well, my Connecticut CCP Application specifically asked what my reason was for requesting a permit.
        
        I, like every other applicant I have ever asked, answered "Recreational".
      2. Jerryskids 10 years ago
        
        Ah, I didn't pay close enough attention to why he wanted the gun. I assumed he meant he wanted some reasonable gun control laws and if the lege didn't by God pass some reasonable gun control laws he was going to go get a gun and start killing the bastards until they did.
  4. BearOdinson 10 years ago
    
    I get sick of people referring to "that's just the world we live in."
    
    When the fuck has the world not been violent?? Nature is brutal and violent, and so humans can be as well. So many people just seem to think because they live in the suburbs they are immune to violence. Or we should have "evolved" out of violence. People are people. They have always been nutjobs and evil fucks, and there always will be. Where possible, we punish those who commit acts of evil, but we should all try to be prepared.
    
    That isn't to say we should be paranoid. Violent crime is down in this country. The odds are very good that a person won't be murdered or become the victim of rape or armed robbery. But it isn't sad that we should be prepared. It is simply the nature of living.
5. Jordan 10 years ago
  
  "My daughter was a victim of violence, so I'm going to make sure millions of innocents have violence inflicted upon them."
6. Slammer 10 years ago
  
  "No! No! not the whip!"
  
  "Yes! The whip"
  
  "No! No, anything but the whip!"
  
  "Anything?"
  
  "The whip! The whip!"
7. OldMexican 10 years ago
  
  In my case, the answer is: "Whatever it takes."
  
  Because prohibitions have worked so well in the past, they will work this time just as well.
John 10 years ago

Is it bad that if I were the next President one of the first things I would do would be to rename Denali back to McKinley? I would do that not because I care what the name is. I don't. I would do it because it would be such a harmless and easy way to torture these people. The crying and gnashing of teeth over such an action would be delicious.
1. LoneWaco 10 years ago
  
  I wouldn't. I'd leave the precedent and just announce the end of Obamacare since that's all it take to overturn an act of Congress.
  1. Drake 10 years ago
    
    That and rename every park and mountain named after a Democrat.
    1. LoneWaco 10 years ago
      
      the stuff Wilson signed into law is like 100 years old and he was white.
    2. Raven Nation 10 years ago
      
      They'd have to re-do the entire map of West Robert Byrd Virginia if someone did that.
2. MJGreen - Docile Citizen 10 years ago
  
  Yeah, it sounds like it makes you an asshole.
Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago

"Scott Walker, meanwhile, says a a wall along the U.S. border with Canada is a "legitimate" idea."

We discussed this last night.

Just put a line in the sand. Canadians will respect it.
1. BigT 10 years ago
  
  Sand? How about the middle of Lakes Erie, Ontario, Huron, and Superior? How will anyone see that line on the bottom of all that water?
  
  This requires better planning, Rufus.
  1. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
    
    Color it RED!
  2. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
    
    Buoys.
    1. Number.6 10 years ago
      
      Surely we could get Obama to part the waters.
    2. BearOdinson 10 years ago
      
      +2 Raquel Welch
Crusty Juggler 10 years ago

From now on I would like you to refer to me by my original Latin name, with is Decorus Aspectu. Thank you.
Grand Moff Serious Man 10 years ago

University of Texas removes statue of Jefferson Davis from campus

A statue of Jefferson Davis was removed from its pedestal Sunday on the campus of the University of Texas at Austin, days after a court rejected an appeal from a Confederate heritage group.

Davis' statue will eventually be displayed in the Briscoe Center history museum on campus, which university officials said is a more appropriate place for it. The Briscoe Center has one of the nation's largest archives on slavery.

The statue has been a target of vandalism as well as criticism that it is a symbol of racism and discrimination. Confederate symbols nationwide are being re-considered following the recent mass shooting of members of a black church in Charleston, South Carolina.

"This is an iconic moment," said Gregory Vincent, the university's vice president for diversity and community engagement, according to the Austin American-Statesman. "It really shows the power of student leadership."

A judge last week ruled against the Sons of Confederate Veterans, which sued to stop the university from moving it.

Statues of other Confederate figures ? Confederate Gens. Robert E. Lee and Albert Sidney Johnston, and Confederate Postmaster General John H. Reagan ? will remain in their places on campus.
1. SugarFree 10 years ago
  
  We have a bar in town named The Jefferson Davis Inn. I would imagine it is only a matter of time.
2. Hank Phillips 10 years ago
  
  Students who want tax collectors to bristle with assault weapons and impunity are the ones who legally disarm the public and make it convenient for Manchurian candidates to gun people down. Interestingly, Jeff Davis was one of the few rebs who pointed to the tariff as the undiscussed cause of the Civil War. The US, in a recession as England withdrew investment to prosecute opium wars in China, attacked Mexico to gain gold in California. (Think Transvaal). The gold made conquest by war feasible, and another tariff of Abomination quickly passed the Red Republican Congress. Nullification had failed, albeit not entirely, so secession was the only escape from the high tariff exactions, hence the War between the States. When I was a UT student most of my profs were intellectuals of the looter persuasion. The Austin lynching of a statue of Jeff Davis, the tax resister, embarrasses but does not surprise me.
3. Contrarian P 10 years ago
  
  I imagine the job of "vice president for diversity and community engagement" pays six figures. What the hell does that title even mean?
Derpetologist 10 years ago

I have obtained secret footage of Hillary meeting with her campaign advisers:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ry7PcYtKPhA
Idle Hands 10 years ago

via drudge: Woman says estranged husband's twisted sex demands gave her PTSD:

Stein ? the DA's chief administrative officer and a prominent Long Island Democrat ? engaged in "predatory and extreme depraved antisocial sexual conduct so egregious it shows a blatant disregard for the marital relationship that it shocks the conscience," the papers say.
Mundy claims Stein ? the campaign chairman for then-DA Rice's 2010 bid for state attorney general ? favored kinky role-playing that included him dressing like a "sissy maid" and calling himself "Jessica" while kneeling at Mundy's feet.

Sounds like a typical Tuesday to me.
1. Lee G 10 years ago
  
  "Husband wore an anal plug with a horse tail and pretended to be a horse by galloping around the marital residence," the filing says.
  
  *outloud laughter*
  1. Lord Humungus 10 years ago
    
    is there something odd about that? *looks nervously around*
    1. Free Society 10 years ago
      
      Oh I'm sorry, I thought this was America.
2. Warty 10 years ago
  
  Mundy also claims he paid a psychic to find out where he stood with Rice "personally and professionally."
  
  There's the most embarrassing part.
3. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  Wow, eesh, amazing how much damage a person can do after a breakup. I mean, seriously, she's estranged and they are taking her word as gospel as opposed to bitter ex.
  1. Warty 10 years ago
    
    It's interesting that she's exposing his harmless perversions as a weapon in the divorce fight. I can't imagine it would go over so well if she revealed that, say, he liked to watch gay porn while banging her or something like that.
    1. Illocust 10 years ago
      
      I don't think this is even a weapon in the divorce fight. It seems more like straight up revenge. I'm not only going to divorce you, I'm going to try and ruin your political career as well.
  2. R C Dean 10 years ago
    
    they are taking her word as gospel
    
    In the service of humiliating a member of the Cop-Industrial Complex, I am willing to forego asking too many questions.
4. John 10 years ago
  
  If you are a women and can't tolerate kinky sex demands, you should either not get married or go find some gay man who needs a beard.
  1. lap83 10 years ago
    
    Guys vary widely in kinkiness level, or so I hear
    1. Number.6 10 years ago
      
      ... go on ....
      1. Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
        
        A woman should do everything her partner asks, and if not she should just go cuddle a gay.
        
        lap83 10 years ago
        
        and the gay guy should just take it? Cuddle rape!
  2. BearOdinson 10 years ago
    
    ^^THIS^^
    Every married person should be willing to try their significant other's kinks. (Up to the point where it may cause true physical harm! Like playing with knives or loaded guns or even choking if one isn't careful). Obviously it also should be give and take. And never forced. But if it means the guy cross-dressing or the chick wearing a strap-on, go with it. FFS life is too fucking short to be this uptight about pleasing your partner.
    1. John 10 years ago
      
      Absolutely. Any woman who thinks she can tell her husband know is kidding themselves. If you won't do it, he will find someone who will. A lot of women just don't understand men and don't understand that saying no to some sexual request is a real emotional issue for men.
  3. CJR 10 years ago
    
    Eh. I can understand not wanting to go along with someone's kink, for whatever reason. I like to think that I'm pretty cosmopolitan, but there are some games that I'm just not interested in playing.
    
    That said, if the one partner can't tolerate the other partner's fetish, then they should be okay with that partner occasionally visiting a pro. Fair is fair.
Hank Phillips 10 years ago

You know what other President made a trip to Alaska?
1. Jordan 10 years ago
  
  President Hitler?
Idle Hands 10 years ago

24 year old male shows tits at award show, america lets out collective yawn:

Miley Cyrus' various costumes for Sunday's MTV Video Music Awards were for the most part nearly naked ? and then she took it a step farther and flashed her nipple during a costume change.
As the camera panned backstage, Cyrus failed to cover up and the broadcast quickly cut away to the crowd while she continued to talk. She then said, "What's happening? Oh, sorry."
Throughout the show, she made drug references and sang about smoking marijuana during the final performance of the show.
Mariana Agathoklis, a representative for MTV, said the shot would be removed from future broadcasts of the show.
1. Lord Humungus 10 years ago
  
  You leave Miley alone!
2. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  Wow, reek of desperation much?
3. Irish ?s ESB 10 years ago
  
  Mariana Agathoklis, a representative for MTV, said the shot would be removed from future broadcasts of the show.
  
  To universal sighs of relief.
Citizen Nothing 10 years ago

Earlier, the Columbus Dispatch newspaper said it was time to "end the perennial defensive action" by the Ohio delegation. It said, "Ohio's congressional representatives should let Denali be Denali."

So. My ex-wife is probably responsible for the renaming of Mt. McKinley. True story.
1. Don'tTreadOnMeChipper 10 years ago
  
  They're in complete denali about this....
Citizen Nothing 10 years ago

And I always support the taking a politician's name off of anything.
Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago

Question: Are the Harbaugh brothers jerks?
Lord Humungus 10 years ago

Warty laughs.

Lonely life of Roberto Esquivel Cabrera, the man with the world's longest penis

He told how his massive member had ruined his life, preventing him from having a relationship and even getting a job.

"Look where it is, it goes far below the knees," Mr Cabrera said.

"I cannot do anything, I cannot work, and I am disabled so I want authorities to declare me as a disabled person and give me support."

Women were too frightened to have sex with him, so he had never had a long-term girlfriend, let alone a wife.
1. Lee G 10 years ago
  
  He should move to Vegas
  1. SugarFree 10 years ago
    
    Reverse donkey show.
    1. Warty 10 years ago
      
      ?El Caballero!
      1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
        
        *reluctant applause*
2. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  He is disabled, but I'm pretty sure he could get a surgery to fix that. Cutting on your junk isn't what I'd imagine as fun, but it would fix the problem. Or he could move to Vegas as a freak act like Lee G suggested.
  1. Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
    
    Cutting on your junk isn't what I'd imagine as fun, but it would fix the problem.
    
    You monster.
    1. PM 10 years ago
      
      It's telling that the world's first penis reduction was only undertaken earlier this year.
      1. Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
        
        I wonder how the doctor came up with a workable size.
        
        lap83 10 years ago
        
        half an inch smaller than his?
        
        Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
        
        That was my thought as well.
3. Monty Crisco 10 years ago
  
  How has a porn producer NOT contacted this guy?!?!?
4. 0x90 10 years ago
  
  Do your ears hang low...
5. Citizen X 10 years ago
  
  "Six inches of me is still a virgin!"
6. hurts_donut 10 years ago
  
  Guys dick looks like Baja California. The longer I look at it the more I want to but a couple jet skis.
straffinrun 10 years ago

Someone may have posted this already, but Colin Quinn on PC culture
1. Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
  
  That was sweet!
  1. straffinrun 10 years ago
    
    I like that one, too. But here's the link I wanted:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5-rHqbp4vE
    1. Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
      
      I watched that special (it is on Netflix). It was pretty good.
Warty 10 years ago

'We cannot be intimidated'

My daughter's brutal murder confirms whatever I already believed in the first place, and now I have a convenient moral bludgeon. DO WHAT I WANT
1. Just say Nikki 10 years ago
  
  "If you are a parent, if you are a mother, if you have children -- how can you look your child in the eye and say we are willing to allow you to be collateral damage in order to keep what some people perceive to be their constitutional rights? If we as a society are willing to accept that, what kind of society are we?"
  
  Yet another reason to hate parents. Trade your brain for a kid! Great fucking idea.
  1. Warty 10 years ago
    
    No collateral damage is acceptable. Brilliant. Ban peanuts, ban swimming pools, ban cars, ban horses.
  2. Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
    
    If we as a society are willing to accept that, what kind of society are we?
    
    A free society?
  3. Zeb 10 years ago
    
    To be fair, they could have been braindead to begin with.
    
    Parents often are nuts, though. Anti-vaccine people are another good example.
    
    I don't know what makes people dumber, romantic love or a parent's love for their child.
    1. Sevo 10 years ago
      
      Sex?
      1. commodious spittoon 10 years ago
        
        As long as you're honest about what you're getting out of it, sex is totally rational.
        
        But then she wants your number or finds out where you live and it's all downhill.
        
        Crusty Juggler 10 years ago
        
        or finds out where you live
        
        This is why I only have sex in my car.
        
        commodious spittoon 10 years ago
        
        This is why I only have sex with my car.
      2. Zeb 10 years ago
        
        Yeah, that, even separate from romantic love makes people pretty dumb.
        
        And there are good biological reasons for all of it. Parental and reproductive instincts are pretty crucial to survival of the species.
  4. John 10 years ago
    
    We don't let the victims' families choose the punishment for criminals and do so for good reason. Grief tends to skew your sense of justice and common sense. For that same reason, we shouldn't let victims' families dictate policy. I can't think of a single good thing that has ever come about because of the family of some unfortunate victim campaigning for a new law so there "loss has meaning".
    
    No. Your loss doesn't have meaning. It is a horrible senseless tragedy that you likely will never fully recover. Face that harsh reality and stop trying to take away everyone's rights in hopes you can get over something that no one ever gets over.
    1. Zeb 10 years ago
      
      A good rule of thumb seems to be that any proposed law named for a crime victim, especially if it's a child, is a terrible idea.
    2. commodious spittoon 10 years ago
      
      Progressives would be the first to argue that the run-up to war after September 11, not to mention drafting and passing the PATRIOT Act, maybe wasn't the most considered legislative undertaking precisely because it came on the heels of a highly visible and upsetting national tragedy.
      
      But standing on top of a few corpses waving their bloodied shirts and demanding repealing or seriously limiting a fundamental Constitutionally-enshrined right of the American people is just peachy, because there's just no time for debate.
  5. Irish ?s ESB 10 years ago
    
    how can you look your child in the eye and say we are willing to allow you to be collateral damage in order to keep what some people perceive to be their constitutional rights?
    
    Let's get rid of free speech too because how do you know someone might be driven crazy by what we're saying and go and kill somebody? And the fourth amendment? Fuck the fourth amendment, are you really willing to potentially let a murderer get away just because you don't want the cops to randomly search your home?
    1. commodious spittoon 10 years ago
      
      Not to mention the tenth. Reserved powers? To the states or people? States that want to bring back Jim Crow and slavery? People who vote for teathuglicans? That much discretion is ripe for collateral damages.
      
      (Who am I kidding, the tenth is thoroughly gutted.)
    2. Tonio 10 years ago
      
      Because so many children ask parents that question.
      1. commodious spittoon 10 years ago
        
        Only after a few years of progressive indoctrination courtesy of compassionate elementary school teachers. "Mommy, why are people destroying the earth?"
        
        R C Dean 10 years ago
        
        "Mommy, why are people destroying the earth?"
        
        "Because we don't want our children to die of starvation, disease, or exposure, dear."
    3. Heroic Mulatto 10 years ago
      
      how can you look your child in the eye and say we are willing to allow you to be collateral damage in order to keep what some people perceive to be their constitutional rights?
      
      You've never told your child that he or she isn't the center of the universe?
      
      No wonder your kid's a brat.
    4. Zeb 10 years ago
      
      "Collateral damage" ? Doesn't seem like quite the right term.
  6. Tonio 10 years ago
    
    "perceive to be constitutional rights"?
    
    Bull. Shit.
  7. Free Society 10 years ago
    
    to keep what some people perceive to be their constitutional rights
    
    So there are other people who don't think the second amendment is real?
2. Zeb 10 years ago
  
  Oh, good grief. The parents of victims of horrific crimes should always be ignored when it comes to policy proposals.
3. lap83 10 years ago
  
  "how can you look your child in the eye and say we are willing to allow you to be collateral damage in order to keep what some people perceive to be their constitutional rights?"
  
  I used to think this was a strawman argument, but I have recently seen some people argue seriously from this position. The problem is that it doesn't accurately reflect the real problem with gun control, which is that it doesn't work. So this presents a false dilemma. Shootings are not the cost of freedom. They're just life, and gun control makes the damage worse.
Sevo 10 years ago

So currently, CA taxes the outfits that accept Medi-cal to fund Medi-cal (along with the feds kicking in a $B or so). Well, it seems that's not enough to get the feds matching money any more, since Medi-cal is now covering 12.5M CA residents, courtesy of O-care.
Surprise! We're gonna have to raise taxes! Now, how do we do that so it looks like we're really not?
Well, let's tax all the other medical 'providers'.
Ah: "If all health care plans are forced to pay a new tax, it is likely the costs will be passed down to customers."
Ya think?
http://www.sfgate.com/health/a.....474962.php
1. Zaytsev 10 years ago
  
  Clearly we just need more poor immigrants on medical to cover the shortfall.
Jordan 10 years ago

China searches for wreckers and Kulaks to blame for stock market crash.

Beijing regulators now seek individuals who have destabilized the markets and spread rumors.

Official want someone to blame after their Large-Scale Share Purchases failed to halt a huge stock market slide.

If China wants to find the culprits behind the selloff, its leaders ought to look in a mirror.

Totally inane growth targets, worthless or near-worthless SOEs, and currency manipulation by China's central bank are obvious problems that helped create a huge property bubble followed by a huge stock market bubble.

Instead of blaming their own bubble-blowing incompetence, Chinese regulators seek scapegoats.
1. Lee G 10 years ago
  
  I think we all knew this was coming.
2. BigT 10 years ago
  
  Instead of blaming their own bubble-blowing incompetence, Chinese American regulators seek scapegoats.
  
  FIFY (see housing bubble crash, 2008)
  1. Jordan 10 years ago
    
    Oh, yes. It's coming back to our shores soon enough when the junk bond/equity/subprime auto loan bubble bursts. The Fed will once again say that "nobody could have foreseen this!" and blame it on the market.
3. Illocust 10 years ago
  
  Well that is how China operates. You embarrass the party you lose your head. Fuck, if I was a Chinese business man I'd be looking to emigrate out of there.
  1. Root Boy 10 years ago
    
    Anchor Babies coming!!
4. OldMexican 10 years ago
  
  Beijing regulators now seek individuals who have destabilized the markets and spread rumors.
  
  "A new Cultural Revolution is just beginning that will get rid society of those who destabilize the market and spread rumors!"
5. Hyperion 10 years ago
  
  I think I just read something recently where the Chinese government was telling companies there to focus on hiring more people. Somehow that was supposed to fix the stock market troubles. WTF? I can't find it but I think it was on Bloomberg.
  
  Anyway, I found this:
  
  Crazy Americans will buy anything
  1. Hyperion 10 years ago
    
    This is most definitely lol worthy.
    
    "Last week, I took testimony from several young female workers from Shenzhen who said they were locked in a work room for 18 straight hours making inflatable Frisbees," Gao said. "Finally, the girls joined hands on the factory floor and began to chant, 'No more insane flying toys for Western pigs!' They quickly lost their jobs and were ostracized by their families, but the incident was a testament to China's growing disillusionment with producing needless crap for fat-ass foreigners."
    1. Illocust 10 years ago
      
      God, people are terrible at picking out what is wrong with their lives, or this guy is missing what was really going on. I hope the girls were actually upset at the whole being locked in for 18 hours thing and not something as stupid as having a job making junk.
      1. Number.6 10 years ago
        
        Check the source of "news item".
        
        Illocust 10 years ago
        
        Oh nvm, thank god the thread is pretty much dead for the day. No one shall see me taking the onion seriously.
        
        In League with the Dark Ones 10 years ago
        
        🙂
    2. R C Dean 10 years ago
      
      I took testimony from several young female workers from Shenzhen who said they were locked in a work room for 18 straight hours making inflatable Frisbees
      
      Yes, go on . . . .
Je suis Woodchipper 10 years ago

Anyone else watch The Admiral? It's South Korean starring the guy from Old Boy. It's badass.

Here's the descrip:

A turgid, foursquare naval epic, the South Korean drama "The Admiral: Roaring Currents" memorializes the 1597 Battle of Myeongnyang, in which the military leader of the title, Yi Sun-shin (Choi Min-sik, from "Oldboy"), with a dozen ships, held off an encroaching Japanese army.
1. Citizen X 10 years ago
  
  turgid, foursquare naval epic
  
  So SugarFree moonlights as a writer of movie blurbs?
  1. SugarFree 10 years ago
    
    Yeah, not exactly a ringing endorsement.
    1. Swiss Servator, ...hat nichts 10 years ago
      
      -1 rum, sodomy and the lash?
2. Karl Hungus 10 years ago
  
  Anyone else watch The Admiral? It's South Korean starring the guy from Old Boy. It's badass.
  
  I've been really getting into some of these Korean action flicks. The ones I've seen have been really well made. The best two I've seen so far are No Tears for The Dead and The Man from Nowhere, both directed by Lee Jeong-beom. Check 'em out, if you haven't already
  
  I've seen The Admiral around in Netflix, haven't watched it yet. Probably will though, on your recommendation.
  1. Hyperion 10 years ago
    
    Are there subtitles in Murikan?
    1. Karl Hungus 10 years ago
      
      Are there subtitles in Murikan?
      
      Yep. Though parts of No Tears for The Dead take place in the U.S., and some of the characters are American.
      1. Root Boy 10 years ago
        
        Yep, great recommendations. Saw both the movies you mentioned and another Korean one that I can't recall the name. Puts some of John Woo's action movies to shame, plus very good stories.
        
        Flu is also good.
  2. Je suis Woodchipper 10 years ago
    
    There's decent buildup and some infighting and other political intrigue. I feel like it would've benefited from being twice as long and deepened some of the characters. Maybe it's a cultural thing but it's certainly different than American action. Much more drama. 4/5 stars.
  3. Je suis Woodchipper 10 years ago
    
    Kinda funny is that the Japanese in Shogun gave passing reference to the Koreans as primitives waiting to be kicked. Yet..
    1. Citizen X 10 years ago
      
      Japanese ships of the time typically relied on arrows and the occasional arquebus for ranged attacks until they could get close enough for boarding action. Korean turtleships, on the other hand, carried very large cannons and incendiary rockets and were fast enough to stay out of the range of grappling hooks.
  4. Lord Humungus 10 years ago
    
    I like the SK take on the horror/serial killer story, something they have a uh, special affinity for:
    
    I Saw The Devil
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwWgp1bqVwE
    
    The Chaser
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKWpmWogo3s
    1. Lord Humungus 10 years ago
      
      Memories of Murder
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTnyhLywdJc
      1. Root Boy 10 years ago
        
        I saw the Devil was terrific and scary sad.
  5. Lee G 10 years ago
    
    I haven't seen The Admiral but I enjoy the Korean flicks so I'll check it out. Thanks.
    
    I recommend Silmido and Thirst if you haven't seen those.
  6. Lord Humungus 10 years ago
    
    War of the Arrows is also a good SK historical flick
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDyIjb272kU
3. R C Dean 10 years ago
  
  I just caught that.
  
  Pretty entertaining. I do like those Asian historical/action epics.
Enough About Woodchippers 10 years ago

Scott Walker, meanwhile, says a a wall along the U.S. border with Canada is a "legitimate" idea.

That's really going to fuck up the International Peace Garden.
1. Zeb 10 years ago
  
  Maybe "legitimate" just means it is something that the human mind is capable of conceiving. That's the most charitable interpretation I can come up with.
  1. Drake 10 years ago
    
    Me too. A legitimate idea can still be horrible.
2. Rufus J. Firefly 10 years ago
  
  The things we learn about these two countries.
  
  Meh.
  
  BUST THE JOINT UP.
*GILMORE* 10 years ago

After having actually watched the clip where walker talks about the Canada border issue... I'm calling bullshit on all this frothing about how he's advocating a wall.

he never even said, "Idea". He said border security was an issue lots of people were talking about.... "even in New Hampshire". Its not even clear he was carrying forward the point that the interviewer was probing for, re: Canada.

as MJ Green? said the other day....it was a non-answer that has been enlarged by the media to use as froth magnets, what with trump not providing any helpful headlines this week.

Fucking stupid. Quit it.
1. John 10 years ago
  
  ^^THIS^^
  
  I get it that Reason is pro open borders. That is a perfectly respectable position even if you don't agree with it, which I largely don't. What is not respectable is lying. Reason claims to be a nonpartisan magazine and takes great pride in claiming to be above the Team Red Team Blue frey. If they want to be that, then they should be that and not lie or distort facts even when it suits their political narrative.
  1. tarran 10 years ago
    
    In Reason's defense, Scott Walker has been very careful not to say stuff that is outrageous.
    
    In the face of such diabolical self-control, what is the millennial journalist supposed to do? How can you hector that which is unhectorable?
    1. *GILMORE* 10 years ago
      
      Yes. He's so boring that they're trolling his boring interviews and then projecting insanity into his desperately evenhanded refusal to take any clear position.
2. MJGreen - Docile Citizen 10 years ago
  
  Aye. I saw Walker's post minutes after it appeared and thought, "Hah, yeah, the silly things politicians say." Then I returned last night and saw the update and realized some people were taking it seriously. Walker is looking worse and worse to me, but this is a big nothing.
3. Zeb 10 years ago
  
  It is stupid. He clearly is not advocating a wall on the Canadian border.
  
  But it's a link to an Australian newspaper in the morning links. I don't think it necessarily reflects any editorial position of Reason. I get the feeling that not a whole lot of thought or effort goes into the links.
Bodica Slayer of Woodchip 10 years ago

"Death Valley" renamed "Planned Parenthood Headquarters"

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