Reason Writers at the Movies: Peter Suderman Reviews Taken 2
Reason Senior Editor Peter Suderman checks out Liam Neeson's very special skills in his Washington Times review of Taken 2:
If I have learned anything from watching the two "Taken" films, it's this: Never go on an international vacation with Liam Neeson.
Sure, it's only his family who have been targeted so far: In the first film, his daughter, Kim (Maggie Grace), was kidnapped in Paris; in the second, the baddies nab his lovely ex-wife, Lenore (Famke Janssen), in Istanbul. But let's face it: If this sequel does well, more sequels, more family members, and more overseas abductions will be required. Family reunions in Rome are obviously begging for trouble, but that's just the beginning. At a certain point, anyone located in Liam Neeson's general vicinity will be at risk.
Still, it's probably not worth worrying too much. The first "Taken" was something of a surprise: a satisfyingly brutal action showcase for Mr. Neeson, who used the film's unexpected success to establish himself as a B-movie action star.
"Taken 2" is more of a missed opportunity. For one thing, there's the title: Why not "ReTaken," or "Taken, Again," or, for those who prefer brevity, "Took"?
If one still insists on going the numbered-sequel route, there's still the matter of the subtitle. It's hard to justify making a movie about spousal kidnapping that's a sequel to a film called "Taken" and not calling it: "Taken 2: Take My Wife, Please."
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Suderman! You alt+text savant, I love you!
Over the past year he's become one of the best.
Is Liam Neeson following some sort of Sam Jackson career path and just accepting whatever highly lucrative roles come his way?
I don't know, but I really hope they do a remake of Les Miserables where he is his more recent bad-ass self as Jean Valjean.
As I was typing this I went to look up the movie, and alas, Hollywood is one step ahead of me and yet 3 steps behind.
Meh. I can forgive the omission of Neeson since the blonde with the cartoonishly big eyes and the astounding rack is apparently in it. She is the closest we have to a real life Jessica Rabbit.
Amanda Siefried and astounding rack does not compute. She's hot, but like most celebs, she's... lacking...
They're not huge, but they are perfect. And she finally pulled em out in that movie where she was the stalker we all wish we had.
My memories of Chloe say otherwise.
I must go re-examine the evidence, then.
I was hoping for Schindler's List 2: Schindler's Pissed. Mel Gibson as Amon Goeth, Chris Tucker as Itzhak Stern, and Angelina Jolie as Helen Hirsh.
I still can't believe he was in Battleship.
IIRC, after his wife died, he said something along the lines of wanting his kids to remember him as a fun guy, so he decided to start taking a bunch of action movie roles. Regardless, Taken was fucking awesome and I look forward to seeing Liam Neeson beat the shit out of more people.
Richard Burton wanted to do much the same and out came Where Eagles Dare.
THEY'RE GOING TO TAKE YOU AGAIN!
Well at least the review was entertaining. "Taken 2: Take My Wife, Please." PS has the funny. Who knew.
What an unexpected talent.
I'm not reading this review because it seems like it would be full of spoilers and I want to be taken by surprise.
Taken was THE third most perfect movie and I can only hope that Taken 2: The Takening will be any fraction as good.
It's spoiler free. Although it does mention Istanbul, Famke Janssen's long lost evil twin and Neeson's new CGI alien side-kick, but otherwise.
What were the first two?
Ghostbusters 2 and Caddyshack, obviously.
I thought it was Broken Arrow and C.H.U.D.?
If you have to ask then you're an idiot. Starting with most perfect: Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan and then Armageddon, in no particular order.
Taken 3: Fist of Etiquette
Direct to video.
Then stay very far away from Loder's review. It's full of spoilers.
The title of the movie is a spoiler.
Can you really spoil a movie whose entire plot is "Liam Neeson beats up swarthy people?"
So does Famke actually get, um, taken? Or are these a bunch of asexual terrorists?
I'm sorry, this is the most unbelievable movie ever.
The guy trained both Obi Wan Kenobi and Batman and he is revered as a god in at least 2 religions, then be proved his badassery by wiping out all those guys kids in the first movie and yet they still thought it was a good idea to mess with them again?
That's just less believable than Arnold and Danny being twins.
I'm looking for the time travel reboot of the series, Will Have Been Taken.
Or when combined with the Heisenberg uncertainty principle, Very Well Could Have Been Taken.
Or the nabbing of a single woman: Miss Taken.
I would have much preferred 'Taken 2: Electric Boogaloo' myself.