Reason Morning Links: Ron Paul One Point Behind Gingrich in Iowa, Time Names "Protester" Person of the Year, Euro Plummets

• IOWA: Newt Gingrich 22 percent, Ron Paul 21 percent, Romney 16 percent. 
• NEW HAMPSHIRE: Romney 33 percent, Gingrich 22 percent, Paul 18 percent. 
• Brinksmanship over the payroll tax cut continues. 
• "The Protester"—from Tunisia to Occupy—is Time's Person of the Year. 
• The Euro slides below $1.30—vacation time!
• Israel cracking down on "Jewish terror."

New at Reason.tv: "Ending the Global Drug War: Voices from the Front Lines"

Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

Newt Gingrich 22 percent, Ron Paul 21 percent, Romney 16 percent

Wow, Romney's a distance second to Gingrich.

[robc]

It appears that Newt's numbers are moving to [redacted] instead of Romney.

[Bee Tagger]

Wow, the margin of error on that poll is 21 percent.

[Joe M]

Actually, the way this is being framed is a Ron Paul win in Iowa is good for Romney, because it slows down Gingrich. They acknowledge his existence now, but he's merely a chess piece, and not a king, if you know what I mean.

All the discussion is about how Romney can benefit, or even that Paul fragmenting the delegates could lead to a brokered convention in which one of the original GOP fantasy candidates like Paul Ryan or Chris Christie comes swooping in to save the party.

I can't remember where I read it, but someone said Ron Paul winning the presidency would be framed as good for the 2016 nominee.

[robc]

2016 nominee

Gary Johnson?

[Joe M]

Gary who?

[Rich]

John Hunstman?

[Viscount Auh20]

Hey, if it gets libertarian ideas presented and moves the party on social issues, I'm not complaining.

[Lord Humungus]

Jet Fuel-Gate Is Obama's New Solyndra
http://news.investors.com/Arti.....n-scam.htm

Now we find the Navy partnering with the Agriculture Department to purchase hundreds of thousands of gallons of alternative biofuel in place of standard JP-5 fuel for Navy aircraft ? the biggest federal purchase of biofuel ever.

It's part of the White House's "we can't wait for Congress" strategy as the 2012 election year looms. But JP-5 typically costs less than $4 a gallon. If a family on a budget started filling up with $16-a-gallon gas, it might want to adopt the motto, "we can't wait to go broke."

[Brett L]

It's way better than the Navy's first biojetfuel contract, which ran about $60/gal. Something about supply and demand...

At this point the Navy is buying infrastructure. Whether that is a good thing or a bad thing, I'm not sold on. But nobody has the facilities to produce that much biofuel, so the Navy has to pay for the plant as well as the fuel.

Do we want our Navy to run on a variety of fuel sources? If so, this probably isn't so bad. (Assuming that the fuel is of high enough quality for the engines they'll be run in.) It isn't that unusual for early adopters to pay a huge premium.

SLD, I would rather the decision of who to buy the fuel from wasn't dictated by lobbyists and insiders.

[R C Dean]

At this point the Navy is buying infrastructure.

IOW, the graft necessary to support unsustainable green energy boondoggles is being routed through the Navy, yes?

[Brett L]

In the same way that Oak Ridge Natl Lab was an uneconomical boondoggle at the time, yes.

[Sevo]

FALSE EQUIVALENCE FAIL!
Oak Ridge was part of an actual war weapons development, and U235 wasn't available at the local airport at much reduced prices.

[Brett L]

And biojetfuel isn't available either. They're paying the infrastructure development cost because they don't want the cheaper but perhaps harder to come by (although I can't fathom how unless we go to war with Canada and Mexico and are unable to secure Trinidad & Tobago and other near-shore refinery bases). It's not indefensible, just stupid. My point is that it only costs $7/gal to make profitably according to the latest I've heard -- but that was probably with a 15yr return cycle on the capital, not one. So $16/gal is not incredibly expensive given their parameters of needing it now from biomass.

[Sevo]

"And biojetfuel isn't available either."
Don't bother with bullshit like that. Your sophistry makes you argument worthless, twit.

[glass half full]

But, in a few years, some private investors with cash will be able to swoop in and buy that infrastructure at pennies on the tens of dollars since the green technology biofuel production fad of the day will have changed.

[RoboCain]

Funny thing is that the biofuel actually has a bigger carbon footprint -- worse for the environment at four times the price.

[Matrix]

To Econuts, it's the thought that counts.

[Mike M.]

These people are completely deranged.

[These People]

Mad! They called me MAD!! Me, with my biofuel!!!

(Takes another big slug of biofuel)

[T]

So much for lowest bid contracting. Now DOD can waste even more money!

[Ted S.]

Oh God, not the fucking -gate suffix again.

[Lord Humungus]

I'm still waiting for gate-gate, the scandal about gates.

[Howard Dean]

IOWA: Newt Gingrich 22 percent, Ron Paul 21 percent, Romney 16 percent.

NEW HAMPSHIRE: Romney 33 percent, Gingrich 22 percent, Paul 18 percent.

YEAH!!

[Brian D]

MSM: "Newt Gingrich may fall to 2nd place in Iowa, just ahead of Mitt Romney..."

[Sanity Clause]

Fucking Massholes in NH. They should have built a border wall.

[Lord Humungus]

Obama Is An Awful Economic Historian
http://www.forbes.com/sites/br.....historian/

There is one major inflection point in U.S. economic history. Before this point, growth was high, at about 4% per year for a century. Also in this period, there was remarkable price stability and so little unemployment that the nation had to import tens of millions of workers from abroad.

After this point, growth was moderate, at about 3% per year for the long term, with variations in the form of major depressions and recessions and a 23-fold inflation which had no like in the previous epoch.

This inflection point was 1913 ? the very year which the reforms TR plumped for in his last campaign, the income tax and the Federal Reserve, came into being. 1913 marks the one secular shift in American economic history toward lower growth and more economic unpleasantness in the form of unemployment, inflation, and serial recession.

[robc]

Had this nation grown at the 4%-rate achieved in the pre-1913 period, we would be twice as well-off today.

This has been my argument with managed economy/stimulus types for years. Preventing booms and busts (not that the Fed Reserve has done a great job of that) hurts long time economic growth. And in the long run, that little bit makes a huge difference.

A depression every 40 years is a fair trade off for that extra 1 percentage point. A small difference in growth rate makes a huge difference two generations down the line.

[robc]

And I dont concede that past depressions are due to free markets, I think they are due to government mucking about in the economy.

[Newt]

He's not a Historian Historian

[Maxxx]

1971 was another inflection point to lower growth and higher inflation.

What happened in 1971?

[Barely Suppressed Rage]

Avocado kitchen appliances.

[Red Rocks Rockin]

Harvest gold shag carpeting.

[EDG reppin' LBC]

What happened in 1971?

T. Rex released the album, Electric Warrior.

[Lord Humungus]

fuck yeah!

[CE]

Charles Manson was sentenced to death.

[CaptainSmartass]

I was born. Yes, it's all my fault.

[robc]

Has anyone been to Red State this election cycle? Are they allowing discussion of Paul this time around?

[robc]

I wonder how much Dondero is freaking out.

So, who is he pitching as the "true" libertarian candidate? His spin of Newt must be awesome, but I dont think it can compare to his support of Guliani.

[Beloved Rev. Blue Moon]

Anybody and everybody who is popular in the immediate moment. Perry, Romeny, a h/t to Johnson...anybody, of course, but say, [redacted]

[Mitch Hedberg]

"The Protester"--from Tunisia to Occupy?is TIME's Person of the Year.

I'm against "The Protester" winning this award, I just don't know how to express it.

[DJF]

How about those earlier protesters, the T-Party, or don't they protest the right things?

[Elspeth Flashman]

It really bothered me when the Tea Party was getting some MSM coverage, and the newscaster would say it was the "Taxed enough already" party. Right. Way to mislead, it wasn't strictly about taxes.

[SugarFree]

Actually, TEA is supposed to be an acronym. Ironically, the newscaster was being extremely respectful compared to the HURR DURR TeaBAG! fuckwads. Although I'm sure it was unintentional on the newscasters part.

[CE]

The more often the phrase "taxed enough already" is repeated, the better.

[Elspeth Flashman]

I never thought of it as an acronym, just a fist-bump to history. And I hated the "teabagger" tag.

[Azathoth]

It's not an acronym. The 'Taxed Enough Already' thing is a happy accident. It's solely referential to the Boston Tea Party.

[RoboCain]

Remember when the cover of Time had this shiny metal box like a mirror, because the person of the year was you!

The whole thing is a joke.

[robc]

You have that on your resume right?

[RoboCain]

Yes, along with a list of my participation trophies.

[Lord Humungus]

I lol'd

[SFC B]

I've been selected Time MOTY twice.

[Methinks]

Thou doth protest too much.

[Elspeth Flashman]

Ha!

[iniquitous]

Why comment on a magazine trying to compete with The Onion?

[Suki]

That is what they are doing? They need to try harder.

[db]

Just take a dump on a newsstand.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Israel cracking down on "Jewish terror."

That their sons will marry shiksas?

[Restoras]

Is that the terror ot is it the terrorism jewish mothers heap on their sons for marrying the shiksas?

[J M]

Israel cracking down on "Jewish terror."

Oh, I'll just sit here in the dark.

[J M]

He used to be such a good boy.

[jtuf]

That their sons will marry shiksas?

That isn't taboo anymore in most Jewish communities, and none of the Jews I know use the word "shiksa".

[Fist of Etiquette]

Hey, do I come down to where you work and slap the dick out of your mouth?

[affenkopf]

It still is taboo in the Jewish communities that attack IDF soldiers and burn down mosques or olive trees.

[Lord Humungus]

This Insane Giant Mothership Will Launch Rockets Into Orbit
http://gizmodo.com/5867710/thi.....into-orbit

The giant mothership, which brings memories of the giganormous Howard Hughes' H-4 Hercules "Spruce Goose", will take SpaceX rocket launchers up to the stratosphere. From there, the mother ship will drop the rocket, which will fire up into orbit. The rocket will be able to deliver a total of 13,500 pounds of cargo up to orbit, including manned spaceships.

[Brett L]

SpaceX gets a private contract. Sweet. I still want to build a skijump style rocket launch system that accelerates the rocket using a steam/magnetic catapult at 2.5gs over about 15km. Would cover the distance in 32s and be going something like 800m/s at launch. Not sure how to handle the supersonic wave that would develop...

[acme corp.]

What ever happened to Wile E. Coyote's giant slingshot idea?

[Pro Libertate]

Read about that yesterday. That's one big bird.

[Elspeth Flashman]

Insane Giant Mothership sounds like a soul/funk tribute band.

[T]

Of Parliament/Funkadelic, obviously.

[Enough About Palin]

George and Bootsy forever!

[Spoonman.]

Damn you polls for making me cautiously optimistic.

[Rich]

I'm of a similar sentiment, Spoonman. I have to keep reminding myself "Polls are like assholes ...."

[R C Dean]

Because what comes out of them is generally only good for fertilizer?

[Rich]

Well, R C, I was thinking "because everyone's got one and they all stink", but your observation is probably better in context.

[Lord Humungus]

Regulation for Dummies
The White House says its rule-making isn't costly or unusual. The evidence shows otherwise.
http://online.wsj.com/article/.....on_LEADTop

The evidence is overwhelming that the Obama regulatory surge is one reason the current economic recovery has been so lackluster by historical standards. Rather than nurture an economy trying to rebuild confidence after a financial heart attack, the Administration pushed through its now-famous blitz of liberal policies on health care, financial services, energy, housing, education and student loans, telecom, labor relations, transportation and probably some other industries we've forgotten. Anyone who thinks this has only minimal impact on business has never been in business.

Mr. Obama can claim he is the progressive second coming of Teddy Roosevelt as he did in Kansas last week, or he can claim to be a regulatory minimalist, but not both. The facts show he's the former.

[AZ]

From that article:
"One problem with all such estimates is that they are based on self-reporting by government. Some agencies like the EPA have a habit of exaggerating benefits and hiding costs, but more importantly its analysis is done before the rules take effect in the real world. Often the true cost of regulation isn't merely compliance but slower growth that diminishes consumer welfare by allocating capital and labor to less valuable or productive uses."

Hmm, so self-reporting based on mathematical fantasy untouched by the real world says regulation hasn't been that bad.

[David Brooks]

And I bought it!

[Maxxx]

Mr. Obama can claim he is the progressive second coming of Teddy Roosevelt as he did in Kansas last week, or he can claim to be a regulatory minimalist, but not both. The facts show he's the former.

The enduring legacy of the Obama administration will be the realization by politicians that they can lie there asses off, promise one thing on monday and do the opposite on tuesday and no one will ever call them on it.

[Quetzalcoatl]

Any policician who is just realizing that now is already streets behind.

[rac3rx]

Only if the politician in question is team blue...

[Maxxx]

The enduring legacy of the Obama administration

You clearly weren't alive during the Clinton years.

[*not Maxxx]

[Anonymous Coward]

TEAM players generally only care when the other team is lying. When their Team members are lying, it's just shrewd politics.

[Ice Nine]

In a year when Occupy Wall Street protestors are Times's Person of the Year, Kate Middleton as runner-up makes perfect sense.

[Bee Tagger]

Women are going to hate when all everyone talks about is Pippa at #3.

[RoboCain]

Who's Pippa?

And WTF did Kate Middleton ever do besides marry royalty?

[Ice Nine]

That's my point. The answer is, just a little less than the OWS protestors did.

[Lost_In_Translation]

Some would say she did more. all the protesters did was stand around and annoy people. Kate actually seduced royalty. Bam!

[Lost_In_Translation]

Pippa is Kate's sister and world's best ass. Other than that, I know nothing about her.

[Kim Kardashian]

HEY!!

[Brett L]

Apparently a bit of a party girl. Well built. Sister-in-law to royalty. Giving men hope and making women hate her.

[Elspeth Flashman]

Hey, she gives me hope too. Now all I need is for my sister to marry royalty 🙂

[RoboCain]

Sir, I question that Britain could have the world's best ass, and in the interest of science, request photographic evidence.

[sarcasmic]

Apparently her ass is so popular it spawned it's own website pippasass.com/

[RoboCain]

Apparently, it can serve HTML:

http://pippasass.com/

[RoboCain]

Apparently, it has it's own website:

http://pippasass.com/

[pfftttt]

world's best ass

World's best ass, my ass! Pasty flat white ass. No junk whatsoever in the trunk.

[Viscount Auh20]

I assume she gives anal and really good head. Because when you're royal, you can hold out for that shit.

[Restoras]

It's good to be the king!

[Ice Nine]

There is so much wrong with that statement.

[Viscount Auh20]

Now that I say it out loud... yes.

[Mr. FIFY]

"Gives anal"? She's into pegging?

[Enough About Palin]

http://celebritynewsandstyle.c.....bum-22.jpg

[Anonymous Coward]

That's not an "ass." That is a butt (shapeless, pasty, appears to be collapsing in on itself.)

Behold, an ass. Notice the shape, the curvature, and excellent sheen of it.

[Atanarjuat]

This is obligatory whenever the Royal weirdos are brought up.

[Lord Humungus]

Al Gore & David Blood: A Manifesto for Sustainable Capitalism
How businesses can embrace environmental, social and governance metrics.
http://online.wsj.com/article/.....on_LEADTop

We are once again facing one of those rare turning points in history when dangerous challenges and limitless opportunities cry out for clear, long-term thinking. The disruptive threats now facing the planet are extraordinary: climate change, water scarcity, poverty, disease, growing income inequality, urbanization, massive economic volatility and more. Businesses cannot be asked to do the job of governments, but companies and investors will ultimately mobilize most of the capital needed to overcome the unprecedented challenges we now face.

Before the crisis and since, we and others have called for a more responsible form of capitalism, what we call sustainable capitalism: a framework that seeks to maximize long-term economic value by reforming markets to address real needs while integrating environmental, social and governance (ESG) metrics throughout the decision-making process.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

sustainable capitalism: a framework that seeks to maximize long-term economic value by reforming markets to address real needs while integrating environmental, social and governance (ESG) metrics throughout the decision-making process.

Now there's some real bullshit bizspeak. Grade A.

SYNERGIEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!

[Rich]

Now there's some real bullshit bizspeak. Grade A.

Agreed, Scruffy. That is a classic. It must have been, um, generated.

[JW]

a framework that seeks to maximize long-term economic value by reforming markets to address real needs while integrating environmental, social and governance (ESG) metrics throughout the decision-making process.

Now THAT's a re-education camp mission statement. Suck on that Kampuchea!

[Lord Humungus]

I work for a 'sustainable' company - which oddly enough makes, er plastic.

We recycle everything and even had 'trash police' at one point, rummaging through refuse and scolding departments for not recycling certain products. After that, they did away with the trashbin - we now have to throw away my garbage into seven separate containers, reminding me of that 'Bullshit' episode about recycling.

We are a privately held company, so the owner has every right to be a enviro-weenie, just don't mention his large carbon footprint - the private jet to his second home out west, the multiple Euro vacations, or the fact we make plastic, which will be around longer than any of us.

[Viscount Auh20]

Ugh. That sounds awful. We have mixed recycling, so we only use one bin.

On a separate note, I think I may be hired as a paralegal soon, with better salary and benefits and shit. So yay! Also, everyone should have to be a receptionist for a while, just to know how shit a job it is.

[Devil's Advocate]

Good luck on getting the new job! 🙂

Have not been a receptionist, but customer support blows chunks as well.

[Enough About Palin]

I was an executive receptionist for a Fortune Fifty company in the 80's. It didn't suck at all.

[rac3rx]

Congrats on the gig, and I agree with you that everyone should have to work in reception for a bit. I think it would cure some of those folks who treat admins like trash. Your admins can make or break you.

[Auric Demonocles]

I dated an admin, is that close enough?

[Ted S.]

What's the difference between a paralegal and a paraillegal?

[Brett L]

About $10/hr.

[DJF]

So Al Gore thinks its sustainable capitalism to fly around the world in jets, stay at 5 star hotels, give speeches and sell indulgences to carbon sinners

[Brett L]

Anything else would fail to sustain his life style.

[Bee Tagger]

The Euro slides below $1.30?vacation time!

Yawn, wake me up when I can go back to saving money by buying my Autechre albums directly from WARP.

[Ice Nine]

Great idea, except by the time the weather in Europe becomes vacation-worthy the Euro is not likely to still exist.

[RoboCain]

The problem was no one could pronounce their name.

[Bee Tagger]

Tell me about it. I still get cold sweats thinking about the time a record store owner corrected my pronunciation.

[RoboCain]

I liked some of the more minimalist European armchair techno. One of my favorites is a Finnish band I can't even type because of the letters.

[Joe M]

This national poll is interesting too: Gingrich 28%, Romney 18%, Paul 12%, Perry 12%, Bachmann 10%. Seems like the vote is fracturing back apart instead of coalescing around Newt after all. He is definitely the flavor of the weak.

[Lost_In_Translation]

Gingrich peaked before the debate and will peter back into the Romney range soon enough. If he loses Iowa and New Hampshire, he's finished.

[P Brooks]

Time picks "Teh Protesterrrrz" as Life Form of the Year?

Way to go.

Speaking of which, was the guy who bombed the bus in Belgium an ANARCHIST protesting the lack of a government?

[Restoras]

Do you mean to tell me that Belgium is not an anarcho/libertairan utopia?? Tony lied to me again.

[Atanarjuat]

I couldn't believe my ears when BBC radio reported that he was "presumed to be a violent right-winger".

[Quetzalcoatl]

The Guardian tells me that he is a "convicted gun fanatic".

So I guess that's a crime over there.

[Zeb]

Didn't Belgium finally form a government recently?

[rac3rx]

Belgium is a myth...like Hogwarts, Narnia, and Canada.

[Auric Demonocles]

As a Vermonter, I've been to Canada many times. Let me be clear, the horrifying legends are true.

[Joe M]

I love seeing articles like this appear. This guy has been covering Ron Paul for months, and he's starting to come around:

There is one issue that can enable Ron Paul to break above his current threshold with great appeal to a wider electorate and make a frontal challenge to the candidates Michele Bachmann (I always give fair credit) brilliantly labeled Newt Romney. This issue is this:

Crony capitalism.

[Enough About Palin]

Meet the Brossarts, a North Dakota family deemed so dangerous that the local sheriff needed unleashed an unmanned Predator drone to help bring them in.

The Brossart's alleged crime? They wouldn't give back three cows and their calves that wandered onto their 3,000-acre farm this summer.
The same aerial vehicles used by the CIA to track down and assassinate terrorists and militants in Pakistan and Afghanistan are now being deployed by cops to spy on Americans in their own backyards.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....z1gWEOw5J8

[RoboCain]

It was bovine intervention.

[Mike M.]

When this subject came up a couple of days ago, some guy on here actually implied that this was no different than the police switching from horseback to cars.

[SugarFree]

At that some guy was Tulpa.

[SugarFree]

*And* fucking phone

[Apatheist]

That would be Tulpa, Romney cocksucking extraordinaire.

[db]

Yeah, that was a complete load of horseshit. How anyone can have such a huge blind spot to potential police abuses, especially given evidence of current real abuses, is beyond me.

[asdf]

Holy fuck. Go Ron Paul!

[P Brooks]

what we call sustainable capitalism: a framework that seeks to maximize long-term economic value by reforming markets to address real needs while integrating environmental, social and governance (ESG) metrics throughout the decision-making process.

Industrial Policy; that's what we need. We'll put our top men on it.

[Enough About Palin]

Mickey Mouse, Adolf Hitler Allowed On Wis. Recall Petitions
GAB Rules Address, Date More Important Than Names

MADISON, Wis. -- The signatures of Mickey Mouse and Adolf Hitler will be counted on recall petitions targeting Gov. Scott Walker as long as they are properly dated and include a Wisconsin address, the board charged with reviewing the petitions was told Tuesday.

Suspicious signatures will be noted when the Government Accountability Board reviews the petitions, but reviewers will look to see that signatures are accompanied by a Wisconsin address and are dated as having been signed during the circulation period, board elections specialist David Buerger said.

"We will flag them, but we will not strike them without challenge," Buerger said after being asked whether Mickey Mouse's signature would be counted. He noted that in previous recall petitions, Adolf Hitler's name was struck because the address given was in Germany, not because of the name itself.

The board unanimously approved the board's plan for reviewing the petitions

http://www.wisn.com/politics/2.....z1gWFgcoAI

[SugarFree]

TRUST DEMOCRACY

[Pro Libertate]

Fraud. . .it's what's for dinner!

[Fist of Etiquette]

Seriously, Adolf Hitler is not old enough to vote.

[Rich]

Seriously, that is a great family photo.

[Atanarjuat]

I thought the dad was an ugly mom at first.

[Chloe]

I've seen kids who are neglected and abused, and based on that family photo they don't look like they are. The parents are still dumb asses.

[Anonymous Coward]

Oliver Wendell Holmes had some words about that. Something about imbeciles...

[T]

In the board's defense, people legally change their names to ridiculous shit. Unless WI has a requirement that petition signers be registered voters, as I think TX does, there's no way to check other than to presumptively strike names. But in a world where a guy is walking around with Optimus Prime on his license, that'll get you sued. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

[Xenocles]

You make it sound almost reasonable when you talk like that.

[T]

I worked elections for 7 years, the last two as an election judge. It blows.

[Pro Libertate]

No, I agree that you can't just strike, but I do think those are serious red flags that you can't just pass along. Anyone with that name registered in the state? Crap, a bank's fraud department could run that down and probably eliminate the person for fraud in a few minutes.

[T]

The devil is in the details, ProL. Election law is a hash of insanity. Example: you have to let people who aren't registered (or cannot be verified to be registered) vote if they insist. There is an entire Rube Goldberg procedure for handling this, and that's just one example. The state bends over backwards to make sure that no one can possibly scream about being disenfranchised. Common sense is nowhere near this process.

I was never so glad as when we moved out of the county and we could quit doing it.

[Pro Libertate]

So people from other states could come in and vote that way, couldn't they?

[T]

Well, they have to show ID now, so technically no. The Rube Goldberg process is supposed to be so the state can go back and see if they slipped through the cracks and actually were registered, which happens.

But we did have one obstreperous twunt one year who insisted she was registered and how dare we turn her away, and blah, blah, blah. We finally got word back from the registrar's office. She had registered in Oregon, so they suspended her Texas registration. So people do try.

[Pro Libertate]

That's criminal. I think in some places, electoral fraud is a big problem that gets winks instead of incarceration.

[oop]

Sadly, once an election has occurred and a winner declared, everyone loses their enthusiasm to investigate fraud. It's somewhat like the NFL rules for challenging the calls of the officials. Challenges are fairly rare and the play called on the field gets the benefit of the doubt.

[Zeb]

It is not impossible that there are people in Wisconsin named Mickey Mouse or Adolph Hitler. If the address is legit, I don't see how they could not count the name. Shouldn't people with silly names be allowed to participate in electoral democracy?

[tut]

If someone were actually named Adolph Hitler, Newsweek or Time would have made it a story replete with quotes from the Southern Poverty Law Center about the rising tide of anti-semitism in America.

[SugarFree]

I'm sorry my vagina is so sensitive.

[Fluffy]

For Jezebel, that woman is actually quite lucid and reasonable.

She actually has gained enough self-awareness to realize that it's not appropriate or fair to resent people for doing stuff you haven't asked them not to do.

Many, many women do not realize that the people around them cannot hear the secret conversations they're having entirely in their own head. Since this woman now apparently does realize that, that puts her one standard deviation up from the mean.

Bravo, Jezebel Writer! Bravo!

[Rich]

I'm sorry I clicked that link.

[WTF]

FTA:

"When I do stupid shit, which is often, ..."

Gee, that's a real shocker.

[Devil's Advocate]

Jezebel, spiritual home of the navel-gazer.

I think there is something to her thoughts that women are socialized to apologize too much (and men not enough), but FFS, anyone who would unironically say "I am sorry my vagina is so sensitive" has some serious issues that transcend socialization. That is not a gender issue, that is all her.

(Also, she seems to make the all-too-common anatomical mistake that conflates the vagina with the vulva/clit. THESE ARE DIFFERENT BODY PARTS and the clit is not attached the to vagina. If you're going to comment about your vagina, learn where it all is. FFS.)

[RoboCain]

Stick it in her pooper?

[Fist of Etiquette]

Breaching Fort Necessity.

[Mongo]

The Difficult Brown.

[WTF]

Then she might have to apologize for something else.

[Rich]

+2

[db]

SIIHPAPP

[Fluffy]

The way to not be disappointed is just to hope for an Iowa caucus win for Paul, but nothing else.

Pop just wanted to win the pennant. He wouldn't even mind if he won one game in the Series. Just the pennant. Just once.

[Lost_In_Translation]

With proportional distribution of candidates this year, I want Paul to pull a Blagovich and come out with something like "look, what I've got is pretty fucking valuable and certain things need to be done acquire these votes" and then make Romeny publicly pledge support to auditing the fed, supporting a balanced budget that puts cuts in the military budget, and does what Obama won't do, end the federal harrassment of medical marajuana states. Also, fuck Gingrich in the ass.

[Maxxx]

Romney does not feel compelled to honor his public announcements.

[P Brooks]

In a year when Occupy Wall Street protestors are Times's Person of the Year, Kate Middleton as runner-up makes perfect sense.

I'm not ordinarily prone to conspiracy theories, but I cannot help but wonder if there was a bit of ballot box stuffing going on at the grownups' edition of My Weekly Reader.

[Ice Nine]

In a year when a guy who has dedicated his life to the service of his country and got split up the middle for it, and an earnest young statesman who works tirelessly to improve things in his country are her co-runners-up, your theory makes perfect sense.

[Brett L]

Realtors lie about home sales.

"The National Association of Realtors said a benchmarking exercise had revealed that some properties were listed more than once, and in some instances, new home sales were also captured. "

I'm sure everyone is surprised as I am that these licensed professionals would do something like this.

[Fluffy]

"Unexpectedly."

[Xenocles]

TSA bitch almost took away my laptop after the checkpoint this morning. I was putting my stuff back on and I had the computer in a bin stacked under the one with my other stuff. The bin on top wasn't even empty yet when she grabs the stack and starts to clear it away. I sure feel safe with such observant people on guard.

[Narcy]

Somebody needs a hug.

[Xenocles]

Nope, they took care of that too.

[Enough About Palin]

lol

[mad libertarian guy]

That's okay.

At least you didn't get felt up by a fat man in rubber gloves making really bad jokes while doing it.

I got that TWICE in 2 days when traveling this week.

Fuck the TSA with a fucking collection of broadheads.

[John]

People always wonder why Holder hasn't been the fall guy for Fast and Furious. Obama could end the whole scandal by firing Holder. It is not like anyone likes him or cares about Holder. So why hasn't he done it? Because Holder is vital to the coordinated fraud planned for the 2012 election. No way could Obama ever get anyone as brazenly corrupt as Holder through Senate confirmation. So Holder will stay no matter what.

http://pjmedia.com/jchristiana.....rity-laws/

[Lost_In_Translation]

I figure Holder's got some Chicago shit on Obama.

[John]

I am sure he has some. But he has an important job to do.

[Rich]

John, why do you hate minorities?

[Dr. Sam Johnson]

He said the Attorney General's near.

[Jerry]

But Republicans have Diebold, not?

[Fist of Etiquette]

TIME's Person of the Year?

[RoboCain]

For such tits, her ass is oddly flat.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs.....awaii.html

[John]

She looks good. Better than I expected.

[Fluffy]

She'd be really hot still if she wasn't so used up looking.

If at age 19 she goes "yoga" instead of going "meth and all nighters" she'd be crackalackin'.

I think what they need to do is follow Zooey Deschanel around for a month, write down everything she does, and then make all starlets do the things on that list and nothing else.

[John]

Or Scarlett Johansson. She is now 27. And still looks like she is 18. She doesn't look used up at all.

[robc]

Zooey is a vegan.

As far as I can tell, its here only flaw, but its a big one.

[John]

That and she is married to perhaps the biggest douchebag in all of the music industry.

[sarcasmic]

Recently divorced.

[John]

Really? I didn't know that. Good for her.

[Restoras]

She was married to Gwyneth Paltrow's husband?

[sarcasmic]

Some emo douche. Death cab or something?

[John]

Actually Paltrow is so annoying, she has made her husband seem sympathetic by comparison.

[sarcasmic]

Yes she is annoying. But I'd fuck her in a heartbeat regardless.

[Trespassers W]

I can't stand Gwyneth Paltrow, which is why it infuriates me every time she's so god-damned endearing and attractive in a role.

[Joe M]

John just hates on DCFC because he doesn't understand it.

[sarcasmic]

And she's an uber-lib.

[John]

She is very cute and certainly not unattractive. But I don't think she is all that she is made out to be. She is not a classic beauty by any means. Hell, I would take her sister before her.

[sarcasmic]

I think part of it is her personality. She seems to be quite the free spirit, which can be good or bad...

[Devil's Advocate]

According to Wikipedia (quoting Health magazine) she is no longer a vegan, although she does apparently have some food allergies that require a special diet.

[robc]

gluten allergy.

I got the vegan thing from her guest spot on Top Chef Masters. They had to cook a birthday party dinner for her, vegan with no gluten and she doesnt like tofu.

They were like "WTF!"

[Auric Demonocles]

Dude, (at least some) vegans still swallow.

[RoboCain]

Lilo has aged so quickly, I suspect it actually was meth.

[WTF]

I know, she looks like she's forty.

[Devil's Advocate]

She is weirdly puffy. I assume that is the drugs and/or alcohol.

[SugarFree]

Probably eats less than 10 grams of protein a day, and gets most of her carbs from alcohol. Losing tone as the muscles eat themselves for amino acids. You go all doughy.

I bet she smells like nail polish remover when she sweats.

[T]

Dude, that brings back flashbacks of running in formation with a bunch of drunks sweating out the weekend. Stop that.

[RoboCain]

"I bet she smells like nail polish remover when she sweats."

DKA? If she were an undiagnosed diabetic she would be dead by now.

[SugarFree]

No, I'm thinking AKA.

[SugarFree]

Combined with a near-starvation diet composed mostly of alcohol.

[sarcasmic]

I'd tag her sister over her any day.

[JW]

'Lil Skeletor?

Are you sure you're not gay?

[sarcasmic]

I'll take the skinny chicks and you can have the fatties.
Fair enough?

[JW]

You take the stick figures and fag hags and I get the real women?

Works for me.

[sarcasmic]

While you're rolling yours in flour trying to find the wet spot, mine will be riding me like she stole me.

Have fun!

[JW]

Christina Hendricks in rolling around, naked, flour?

I'll be, well, you know where.

[WTF]

Lindsey Vonn.

I think we can all agree.

[sarcasmic]

Affirmative!

[Restoras]

I didn't even need to click the link to agree most heartily.

[Pantless Deviant]

She has terrible skin. Otherwise, she kinda looks like Jessica Lange. Somewhat.

[Anonymous Coward]

Is it wrong to scream in terror everytime Lindsey Lohan's potato sack-like body appears in a state of undress?

[Brett L]

EPA fracks up fracking report

" However, it turns out that the EPA drilled two monitoring wells to some 900 feet ? much deeper than water wells which are usually at about 300 feet ? and indeed found hydrocarbons. In short, they drilled into the natural gas reservoir that has long attracted industry producers. It may the single most productive moment in EPA history. "

[Xenocles]

For some reason that makes me really happy.

[Lost_In_Translation]

EPA drills gas well...shocked at results.

[R C Dean]

Hilarious.

When you drill a "water" well into a natural gas reservoir, it stops being a water well, and becomes a natural gas well. Who knew?

[Lost_In_Translation]

Who knew?

Not Chu.

[JW]

Who knew?

Not Chu.

Is that from Frakkin' the Lorax?

[Fluffy]

It doesn't matter.

This was a Rearden Metal report from the get-go.

The point of it is not and never was to be accurate or even to make sense. Its ONLY point was to make it so that in every local debate about permitting fracking, the green side can say, "Well, the EPA said that this pollutes groundwater."

That's it. The report has no other reason to exist. Rebutting the report or the methodology of the test accomplishes nothing, because it was always meant to be a public relations lie to enable and empower the public relations lies of others, to a political end.

[Lord Humungus]

Inside Wukan: the Chinese village that fought back
Something extraordinary has happened in the Chinese village of Wukan.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/new.....-back.html

For the first time on record, the Chinese Communist party has lost all control, with the population of 20,000 in this southern fishing village now in open revolt.

The last of Wukan's dozen party officials fled on Monday after thousands of people blocked armed police from retaking the village, standing firm against tear gas and water cannons.

Since then, the police have retreated to a roadblock, some three miles away, in order to prevent food and water from entering, and villagers from leaving.

[Brett L]

B-
No giant puppets.

[Mike M.]

Obama trailing in the polls in every swing state to both Romney and Gingrich (slightly more to Romney).

If the economy doesn't make a miraculous recovery in the next ten months or so, the dickhead is going to lose no matter who the nominee is.

[Rich]

I, for one, welcome our new stimulus package.

/sarc

[Maxxx]

yep.

[Fluffy]

I also wonder how long they had to tweak the sample on that Iowa poll to make sure Paul stayed one point behind.

[John]

If Willard would have been smart, he would have not campaigned in Iowa and sent his volunteers out for Paul. Gingrich needs Iowa more than Willard does. Then Romney could have won New Hampshire and Gingrich would be stuck with two second place showings and in big trouble.

[Viscount Auh20]

This sounds like the second season of The West Wing(god, that show gets really disappointing when Aaron Sorkin decided to make it his liberal soapbox)

[Fluffy]

That can still work.

I thought on caucus night after everyone showed up and no one got a majority at a particular county site, they'd keep revoting until someone did. And that Mitt's people can count noses and all go to Paul to deny Gingrich the win (if the campaign so instructs them).

Am I just completely imagining a fake caucus process or is that how it works?

[John]

I am not sure how it works. It is a very seedy process. The problem with doing it now is that Romney has tried to hard to win there. So, getting killed in Iowa will kill his momentum.

[Lost_In_Translation]

Killing Gingrich's momentum would allow Romney to claim superiority in New Hampshire and downplay any Gingrich win in South Carolina. Florida's lost half its delegates and the rest of the states could swing any way between now and their primaries. Gingrich is on the downfall and Romeny needs to do anything he can to help that process along.

Paul winning would also help bring his totals up across the nation and possibly cause a brokered convention since his delegates can't be taken away in a winner take all like 2008.

[John]

How is Newt on a downfall? Where are you guys getting this? I am getting just the opposite.

[Lost_In_Translation]

dude, go to realclearpolitics.com and look at his latest numbers. Since the weekend they've been getting softer by the day.

[robc]

THE TOP OF THE FUCKING THREAD. FIRST FUCKING LINK.

[SugarFree]

Newt is not on a downfall, he is teetering on a precipice--one he has always teetered on. The probama media can push him off anytime they want. That's why they are overjoyed that he is the frontrunner.

[Lost_In_Translation]

Not complete collapse, but he's down to the point that Paul could edge him out, which would put him in complete collapse.

[Jerry]

I would say that Romney rather sees Paul winning in Iowa than Gingrich.

[Viscount Auh20]

The GOP works slightly differently than the Dems(you don't get to keep arguing) but as I recall, basically.

[robc]

Fluffy is describing the Dem procedure. And it isnt about majority, its about enough to get a rep to the county convention (15% minimum, I think).

[kinnath]

Correct. The Dems require a candidate to be "viable" so voting continues until the losers are voted off the island.

The Repubs just capture the number from the first vote and send in the results.

[Lost_In_Translation]

For all of Romney's faults, Paul could probably work with him, which is more than one can say about any other candidate.

Romney would have to be a complete idiot to miss that.

[robc]

Newt is going to finish 3rd in both on his own.

[John]

I don't think so. I don't like Newt but he seems to be rolling right now.

[robc]

???

He is already in free fall. He has peaked and is on the way down.

[John]

How is he in free fall? His polls are way up. And worse still several polls show him beating Obama, which takes away Romney's entire reason for being.

The establishment has nowhere else to go. They won't vote for Romney. And they can't vote for Paul. So who else is there? Newt is not going anywhere. Newt is the favorite right now.

[Lost_In_Translation]

This is the republican party that took a deep breath and nominated Dole. I think they'll open their mouth wide enough to swallow Romney, especially since Gingrich won't run out of negative soundbites from here to Jan 3rd.

[John]

I think you are wrong. Romney is not winning. I think Newt is worse. But, I don't see any way he loses.

[robc]

How is he not in free fall? He has lost like 8 pts in Iowa already.

Did you not read the links at the top of the thread?

[John]

I read it. And I think part of it is Paul getting a lot of Cain's supporters. Unless Bachman makes a comeback, establishment Mitt haters have nowhere else to go.

[Lost_In_Translation]

*headsmack*

If Paul is getting Cain supporters, why is Newt down 11 points?

[John]

He won't stay down. You watch.

[Lost_In_Translation]

I will. But John, I don't think Gingrich is akin to a weeble wobble.

[Azathoth]

Are you fucking insane? The Establishment is slobbering Romney's knob. They hate Gingrich. Wander around the REP side of the blogosphere and the establishment venues are all over Mitt--and very quick to reprint anything that puts down Newt--no matter the source.

[Viscount Auh20]

He has no ground game. He's tossing together an organization in a month

The guy's good, but not that good.

[John]

It is 2011. You don't need a ground game. You need voters. And Newt has that.

[Lost_In_Translation]

He'll find he has less than he thinks come the 3rd. His voters will bolt to Bachmann and Perry and Paul will be left holding the plurality.

[Cabeza de Vaca]

John, You don't understand how the Iowa caucus works. Iowa winters are cold & caucusing takes along time. If you don't have an organization that will make sure suppoters show up(make phone calls asking if you need a ride to the polling station) you will lose.

[Lost_In_Translation]

Dude, he's not that fat...

[Viscount Auh20]

So, how good is Phoenix Wright, because I love that game?

[Enough About Palin]

Lindsay Lohan...you make the call...

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs.....awaii.html

[Viscount Auh20]

She was good in Playboy.

...

What? I read it for the articles!

[Lost_In_Translation]

Playboy could make Betty White (2011) look hot.

[Barely Suppressed Rage]

Didja see the ancient black and whites of Betty White nude as a young woman?

She actually looked pretty damn tasty way back when.

[Ice Nine]

She was good in Playboy.

The fact that she didn't look like Lindsay Lohan helped immensely.

[RoboCain]

See above 🙂

[Enough About Palin]

I word searched "Lohan" before posting the link. I think there should be a rule that if one posts girlie pics in the Morning Links, one should include the girlie's name in the post.

[billquoted]

Donald Trump and adding assholocracy to the dictionary

Donald Trump is famous here in Scotland. Famous for his cruel treatment of the ordinary people he has tried hard to oust from their homes so he can get control of their land, which adjoins the golf resort he is trying to build north of Aberdeen. (There is an excellent documentary on his unpleasant dealings: You've Been Trumped. The capacity crowd in Edinburgh the night I saw it broke into applause, and it was not for the Donald.) To see Trump trying to play a decisive role in choosing the next Republican presidential candidate even as he threatens to split their vote by running against them as an independent really interests us over here. It should be even more interesting to those of you who are on the left hand side of the Atlantic.

The thought of Trump having political power and influence convinces me that assholocracy is going to get my vote at the American Dialect Society's voting session. It's not just to make sure we don't find some stupid compositional phrase winning (I shudder at the thought of having to battle against my good friend Ben Zimmer over such a thing, but you can already see the way he's leaning on the phrase issue), no; it's because assholocracy is a terse and valuable addition to the vocabulary.

[Viscount Auh20]

Also, I saw Two And A Half Men last night while flipping channels with the rooommate. We weren't going to watch, but it is so bad that it became fascinating. Seriously, how is that, of all things, the #1 show in the US?

America, you are the Britta of countries!

[robc]

No one knows.

[Devil's Advocate]

My dad LOVES that show. And not because he thinks it is hilariously bad. I don't get it. (That is, I don't get his love, I get the humor of the show just fine.)

[Ice Nine]

Be careful about admitting that.

[SugarFree]

I see how people find it funny, I just don't see how those people manage to do anything else, like holding down a job, feeding themselves, basic issues of personal hygiene, or not setting themselves on fire every time they put gas in the cars that a sane society would never allow them to drive in the first place.

[Devil's Advocate]

The thing with my dad liking it kind of boggles my mind because he has a sophisticated, ironic, dry sense of humor most of the time, and yet, he loves that show. It just goes to show that people are weird. 😉

[John]

My parents are like that too. And they both had an undying love for Cheech and Chong movies. Go figure.

[P Brooks]

the police have retreated to a roadblock, some three miles away, in order to prevent food and water from entering

I would expect limited success for this tactic when employed against a fishing village.

[Brett L]

They've also blockaded the harbor.

[Fluffy]

Everybody in that village is going to die.

And this is the wave of the future, according to our friend The Truth.

FORWARD, COMRADES

[Restoras]

Omelette, eggs, etc.

[Rachel Maddow]

LEAN FORWARD, COMRADES!

[Enough About Palin]

"Everybody in that village is going to die."

Since these protesters have just been named persons of the year by Time, they can die contentedly.

[Narcy]

101st!

[P Brooks]

They've also blockaded the harbor.

Oh, well.

It's for the greater good. You have to break a few eggs to keep the peasants in line. Those criminals are stealing from society; it's like they're hoarding medicine when there are sick children waiting for treatment.

[Mike M.]

It's good to know that the spirit of Mao Tse Tung continues on strong over there.

[sloopyinca]

OK you screwheads, listen up. It's time for the Reason Hit & Run College Football Bowl Pick-em. It's free, and you can hide your e-mail address if you're totally paranoid.

Here is the link to the league.

Password: liberty

There's already about a dozen of us in it, but there's no limit as far as I can tell. But hurry up! The first games start Saturday.

[RoboCain]

NFL > College

[John]

College >Tebow Tebow > NFL. The NFL is the TV dinner of sports, packaged defrosted mush.

[sloopyinca]

The NFL may be > than college, but the NFL doesn't have 28 bowl games for us to pick and talk shit about for the next 3 weeks. Besides, we already have a FFL going. The semifinals are this week.

[RoboCain]

Sorry, I didn't mean that as anything against your efforts. I just don't follow college ball myself.

[Mike M.]

Call me crazy, but no matter hard how I might try, I just can't get myself all that excited about the S.D. County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl.

[sloopyinca]

I can't either Mike. But I can get excited about giving someone shit that took La Tech in that game when everyone knows TCU is gonna win by at least 4 scores.

[sloopyinca]

C'mon, people. We're spreading like locusts. Up to 17 players. Either get on board, or I'm gonna harangue like I've got a fundraiser going and need 120 more people on the last day to hit my goal.

And we know how everybody feels about that.

[robc]

When the NFL has the full range of offenses that exist in college football, it will be better. Until then, not even close.

NFLAids is real and unwatchable.

[robc]

For example, Army v Navy, while played between two bad teams, was a fucking amazing game.

Flexbone vs modified-hybrid-wish/flex-boney-thing-whatthefuck that Army was running.

Freaking awesome.

[Viscount Auh20]

Well, when D-1 gets a playoff, it will be a real sport, so that.

[Ted S.]

Just watch the Packers beat the crap out of everybody. And do it with a team owned by the fans.

[Brett L]

"When the NFL has the full range of offenses that exist in college football, it will be better."

If they'd just stop punting on 4th & 2 between the 40s in close games. And running the prevent defense. The only thing that scheme prevents is winning.

[Viscount Auh20]

Well, I beat that asshole Tulpa despite my QB throwing 2 picks and no TDs. So, for the year, I',m set. Also, Tulpa?

"Fuck the league? Well, I see you don't want cheering up, Dude. C'mon Donny, let's get us a lane."

[Citizen Nothing]

Ok. I'm in, and riding the MAC to victory.

[rather]

Holy shit, links are boring today. Lindsay Lohan would fuck any of you and that's even with a meth covered dick.

jEZEBEL stories bore the shit out of me too; let's talk about men instead

[RoboCain]

Apparently, it has it's own website, but I keep getting "Your post has been marked as spam by a third-party spam filter. If this is a mistake, please email [e-mail]."

[RoboCain]

Stupid the fuck squirrels, that was in response to the Pippa Middleton thread.

[sarcasmic]

I tried to link "pippa's ass dot com" to you but on that thread but got the spam message.

[John]

Now the Arab Spring is getting interesting

http://www.kuwaittimes.net/rea.....I2MzE3NA==

Meanwhile, the Syrian President's advisor Buthaina Shaaban has allegedly threatened to expose sex tapes involving rulers from Gulf countries. Shaaban briefed a delegation from the Syrian community residing in region after a meeting was held with Bashar Al-Asad. The advisor reportedly said, "officials from Gulf countries will be shown what 'trump' cards we have after we release their sex tapes to internet websites.

[Lost_In_Translation]

Damn, don't go to Syria for your whoring.

[Colin]

I can clearly remember when the Euro for a long time was equal to the dollar.

Talk to me when it falls below that mark.

[Zeb]

It was like 90 cents for a while (though before they started using Euro currency).

[Viscount Auh20]

So, I am really enjoying NTSF:SD:SUV

[John]

http://www.mcall.com/news/loca.....7617.story

Cops tazer 14 year old in the groin.

[SugarFree]

The girl was taken to the hospital to have the probes from the Taser removed.

Egads!

[John]

And the charges against her were dropped. And the tape of the incident is "unavailable". It was a bunch of mouthy teenagers who wouldn't get out of the street. So the cop tazed her. This will cost the taxpayers a few million.

[RoboCain]

It was quite a laundry list of charges.

According to the cops, she struck an officer. Which may or may not be true.

[Lost_In_Translation]

Drunk...In...Public

I tell you that story to tell you this one...

[Barely Suppressed Rage]

You got The Tater.

[R C Dean]

Let's go to the videotape!

Plus, if she really struck an officer, no way are charges dropped. That's lese majeste.

[RoboCain]

But she was a girl.

[R C Dean]

Cops tazer 14 year old in the groin.

You tend to shoot what you're actually looking at, you know. . . .

[Lost_In_Translation]

her boobs must have been disappointing.

[Xenocles]

Well if you can think of a funnier place to taze someone I'd like to hear it.

[barf]

[Brett L]

This is all because students were "disorderly" during dismissal. High school students. Not listening. To cops. Of course, they didn't pick the starting middle linebacker to enforce orderly dismissal upon.

[RoboCain]

"A new laser designed to temporarily blind people is going to be trialled by police.

Called the SMU 100 it costs ?25,000 and sends out a three-metre "wall of light" that leaves anyone caught in it briefly unable to see.

Designed by a former Royal Marine Commando, it was originally developed for use against pirates in Somalia.

Its makers claim an unnamed police force is set to trial the device which could be used against rioters."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/16137543

[Fluffy]

Steal one, reverse engineer it, and use it on police. Especially police helicopters. And mounted police. I bet the horses will love that.

[John]

In a no kidding riot, it is actually a good invention. Better to temporarily blind people than shoot them. The problem is that it will no doubt be misused.

[T]

Steal one? What, they won't sell it to my ambiguously named closely held corporation? I bet they will...

[JEP]

Just hand out laser safety glasses at the riots you attend. Better yet, figure out what filters the safety glasses use, and make them as contact lenses.

[db]

I thought the UN had banned these for use in warfare. I guess anything goes when you're "ensuring domestic tranquility."

[Chinny Chin Chin]

I don't think I'm going too far out on a limb in guessing that this gadget will end up blinding people, exactly as "non lethal" tasers are involved in deadly encounters.

And further I'm going to guess that the official response to such incidents will be that the devices are safe and that the newly-blind individual had pre-existing conditions.

[New West Republic]

Cops: Permanent blindness is a known side-effect of excited delirium.

[Barely Suppressed Rage]

Here is the (edited) video of the cop tasering the girl.

Note how it is conveniently "edited" to omit the actual confrontation. It just suddenly jumps to the part with the cop pusher her against the car and then backing away and Tasing her.

Yeah, because there's just no other way a full-grown male cop possibly could handle a 14 year-old girl.

[EDG reppin' LBC]

I live in mortal fear of being violently attacked by a 14 year old girl. Those little fists....

[Barely Suppressed Rage]

Also, in his report, the cop says saying he aimed lower because the teen was using her backpack to block the Taser. The video shows her upper body exposed.

He also reported that "hundreds" of students were blocking vehicle traffic; the video only shows a small number of students on the street.

The police might embellish a report? Me am shocked.

[Fist of Etiquette]

HFS, did you see the size of that cop with the ponytail at the end, leading the cuffed student along the lower screen?

[Coeus]

Cops tazer 14 year old in the groin.

From the video, she did fight him. But also from the video, she was in between two parked cars, so she had every right to tell him to fuck off.

[Brett L]

Even MacGyer can't fix these new computerized cars. Or he was out of paper clips. Not sure which.

"The now 61-year-old star, who played Angus MacGyver in the hit TV series for seven years, was seen on the side of the road with his Audi sedan, seemingly waiting for some assistance. "

[JW]

Looking at the pics, time is one cruel motherfucker.

[RoboCain]

He looks OK for a 61-year old man.

[JW]

Considering what he looked like when he quit Stargate 5 years ago, never mind what he looked like 25 years ago, that's not looking too good.

[Ice Nine]

He looks like a 61-year old man.

[Mike Laursen]

MacGyver could whittle his own paperclips.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Angus MacGyver? On the show, his last name was MacGyver? Learn something new every day.

[Zeb]

They do realize that MacGyver is a fictional character?

[Brett L]

Please. We have fights about which fictional character would win on a fight in these comments. A little all-in-fun joke about the actor not being the character is well within whatever boundaries might theoretically exist in the MLs.

[Tony]

Ron Paul better not fuck this up. I don't think Romney can beat Obama, but it would be so much more fun watching Gingrich get taken down along with the Republican party forever.

[John]

Tony it is called whistling past the graveyard. Obama might actually destroy the Democratic Party. I hope all of that hopey changey stuff was worth it.

http://www.usatoday.com/news/p.....o8154lyas0

[Xenocles]

I seem to remember them saying the same thing in 2008.

[Restoras]

^^This is why I'll not be voting for the Republican candidate.

[Mr. FIFY]

Notice how Tony wants one-party rule... sometimes, it's not as blatant as his post above, but he's all about tyranny Team Blue-style.

Which would be just as bad as the Democrat Party being completely destroyed, mind you...

[Tony]

I don't want one-party rule, I want a multiparty parliamentary system. Until that time the best we can do is to keep the rightwing lunatics from destroying this country more than they already have. It's not my fault they've taken over one of two major political parties.

[RoboCain]

I'm convinced liberals deliberately want more crime.

"How about enforcing the laws you already have on the books? I know it's kooky, but it just might be crazy enough to work. Mike Bloomberg, MAIG maestro and perpetual anti-gun rights crusader, made bales of hay from the fatal shooting of NYPD officer Peter Figoski. Not that it takes much for hizzoner to hop up on his well worn screw-the-constitution soapbox. But a dead cop is just the kind of never-let-a-crisis-go-to-waste opportunity Mayor Mike just can't let pass by. It's positively Pavlovian. Except now that a little time has passed and some of the facts of the case have been uncovered, a few inconvenient truths about the shooter, Lamont Pride (above, center), have come to light?"

http://www.thetruthaboutguns.c.....more-87209

[Anonymous Coward]

The bloody shirt won't wave itself, you know?

[P Brooks]

I bet she smells like nail polish remover when she sweats.

!!!!!

[SugarFree]

Sorry... Did I accidentally hit on your super-secret fetish?

[RoboCain]

"The Pansies Converted Daily billboard is quite possibly the most offensive advertisement I've ever seen. Congratulations. According to dictionary.com, the slang meaning of the word pansy is a) a male homosexual, b) a weak, effeminate, and often cowardly man." Either way, it is derogatory and designed to intimidate a certain population. Your billboard is an example of institutionalized bullying which incites violence towards homosexuals. Or do you actually have pots of pansies that people shoot, thus converting them to rubble? Please clarify your meaning. If I am incorrect in my assumption, I will promptly apologize and come to your range to destroy flower pots."

http://instinctmagazine.com/bl.....ory=100011

[Devil's Advocate]

Thereby Streisand Effecting the asshats and making sure everyone knows about the business. I don't know why these do-gooders can't just think to themselves "Oh hey! These look like deliberately offensive jerkwads! Guess I won't do business with them!"

[Zeb]

The advertisement is kind of stupid and somewhat offensive. But why does this person think that "converted" means shot? Seems pretty clear to me that the idea is that once you get someone on the range, they will quickly become less timid about guns.

[Devil's Advocate]

I thought it was playing on the converting gay people trope, e.g. we're so manly with our mad gunz we'll turn even gay people straight. Still, I think you are right as well. Both meanings are possible.

[robc]

For some reason, this is going thru my head this morning:

In 1844, the Democrats were split
The three nominees for the presidential candidate
Were Martin Van Buren, a former president and an abolitionist
James Buchanan, a moderate
Louis Cass, a general and expansionist
From Nashville came a dark horse riding up
He was James K. Polk, Napoleon of the Stump

Austere, severe, he held few people dear
His oratory filled his foes with fear
The factions soon agreed
He's just the man we need
To bring about victory
Fulfill our manifest destiny
And annex the land the Mexicans command
And when the votes were cast the winner was
Mister James K. Polk, Napoleon of the Stump

In four short years he met his every goal
He seized the whole southwest from Mexico
Made sure the tarriffs fell
And made the English sell the Oregon territory
He built an independent treasury
Having done all this he sought no second term
But precious few have mourned the passing of
Mister James K. Polk, our eleventh president
Young Hickory, Napoleon of the Stump

[Lost_In_Translation]

*golf clap*

[rac3rx]

What's with the They Might Be Giants?

[sloopyinca]

I know there are some Auburn fans on here, so maybe they could answer some questions. How come both your O-Coordinator and D-Coordinator have run to accept crappy head coaching jobs? And 3 other assistant coached have left in the past 3 weeks? It's almost as if they're getting the hell out of Dodge before something big goes down.

What happens to the BCS trophy you guys got last year when the hammer drops? Because that's my guess as to what's happening.

[Pro Libertate]

It could also be the usual raid on successful teams. Florida lost assistant coaches after the recent national titles.

Taking a head coaching job, of course, is rarely a bad idea, because then you are in "the club."

Not that there might not be something brewing there, but I don't think coaches getting sucked up necessarily means anything.

[sloopyinca]

I doubt Malzahn will be making any more money at Arky State than he would have made at Auburn. And he's got big shoes to fill (at that level anyway). Freeze is loved there.

Nope. There's something brewing when last year's O-Coordinator of the year leaves Auburn for a Sun Belt job. If anything, he would have been in the running for a MAC-level or even MWC-level job. That I might understand, but not the fucking Sun Belt.

Something is getting ready to go down in Auburn. Mark my words. Oh, and Pro Lib, why haven't you joined the Bowl Pick-em yet? Are you chicken?

[Pro Libertate]

Chicken of what? I don't even know what you're talking about.

[sloopyinca]

I'm just trying to get you in the College Bowl Pick-em. I called you chicken because mentally I'm a child.

[R C Dean]

Being head coach is like being general counsel: lots of people will leave bigger outfits where they are an assistant to be the big dog of a smaller outfit.

Sets you up to be the big dog of a bigger outfit. Plus, groupies.

[John]

I agree with Pro. Head jobs are hard to get. And they pay a lot more than assistant jobs. Also, the way to one of the big BCS jobs is usually by winning at a smaller program.

Auburn, like most of college football and all of the SEC is probably dirty. But, the NCAA doesn't seem to mind that much lately.

[Ron Paul]

But do the jobs pay in GOLD?

[sloopyinca]

Head jobs are hard to get.

You need to date a wider range of women.

[sarcasmic]

You know what they say about wives vs jobs.
After five years the job still sucks.

[sloopyinca]

rimshot

[sarcasmic]

Or wives vs dogs.
After five years the dog is still happy to see you when you come home from work.

[sloopyinca]

Or Sandusky and kids.
"They're all pink on the inside."

[sarcasmic]

ew

[CrackertyAssCracker]

I'm not sure if Roof (D-Coordinator) leaving was exactly 100% voluntary. Definitely wouldn't surprise me if it was more of a being-allowed-to-quite-to-save-face kind of situation. Our defense has sucked, and has been getting worse.

Malzahn was just too good of a coordinator to keep forever. I thought we had survived the onslaught and were going to keep him for more than one year. And it is surprising that he went to Arkansas State. He is from Arkansas though ... I think that has at least a little bit to do with it.

Will be interesting to see if Gus is made to be a head coach, or if he just should have been happy as an O-coordinator.

[CrackertyAssCracker]

s/more than one year/one more year/

[Ted S.]

They can't buy the next Cam Newton. That's why they're leaving.

[Ron Paul]

If I win Iowa, I'll certainly win the nomination because I'm powered by GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD!!

Gold gold gold hehe yeeeeeeeeees, sir, there's GOLDB in them thar hills! Heheh yeeeeehaaaw!

[CE]

Gold > paper/electronic money, especially when the government printing/creating the latter collapses.

[|]

http://thehill.com/blogs/ballo.....na-florida

Newt Gingrich leads Mitt Romney in South Carolina and Florida, according to a new poll released Monday.

The new survey by NBC News-Marist shows Gingrich pulling ahead of Romney in two key, early-voting states but still trailing President Obama in a general election.

In a hypothetical match-up between Obama and Gingrich as the Republican nominee, registered voters were closely divided, at 46-42. Similarly, a race between Obama and Romney as the Republican nominee polled at 45-42 in the state.

Yes, you read right. That's in South Carolina.

[H Payne]

Do those guys really think anyone with an ounce of common sense is buying that nonsense??

http://www.AnonSurfing.tk

[A Guy Who Fawkes You]

Can someone print me out a copy of TIME magazine?

I need to wipe my ass. Hurry....

I just pooped on a police car and called it "justice."

[jtuf]

I condemn the vandalism in Israel.

[affenkopf]

So you approve of vandalism outside of Israel?

[CE]

Too bad South Carolina and Florida will follow Ron Paul's strong early showing in Iowa and New Hampshire, and the media will pump up those results while ignoring other strong Ron Paul states like Nevada and Maine....