When a Kid Kicks the Back of Your Seat on a Flight Today, You Might be Saving a Life
As Americans board Thanksgiving flights around the country this afternoon, wary experienced flyers will be on the lookout for the worst case scenario: a toddler who is riding on his mother's lap. Being seated in front of jetsetting kid guarantees hours of the least relaxing shiatsu chair massage ever.
But in an age when car seats feature five- or six-point harnesses similar to those used by NASCAR drivers and fighter pilots, why do airlines continue to let kids bounce around the cabin (and into the back of my damn seat)? Turns out, that policy saves lives:
[The Federal Aviation Authority] maintains that [requiring kids to fly buckled into safety seats] would require families—now accustomed to children under 2 years old flying free if they sit in a parent's lap—to pay for the extra seat. That cost, the F.A.A. surmises, would cause some families to revert to car travel, which is less safe. "Consequently," states the agency in its latest response to the safety board, "entire families would be subject to far higher fatality rates, which would produce a net increase in overall transportation fatalities."
But non-dead families isn't enough for folks who see such issues in terms of equality instead of outcomes:
Not surprisingly, safety seat advocates dismiss this argument as beside the point. Requiring every passenger to be appropriately belted in is "a simple matter of equal protection," said Stephanie M. Tombrello, executive director of SafetyBeltSafe U.S.A., a nonprofit group that focuses on child passenger safety.
More from the Reason archive on flying safely here.
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Soooo, we don't require kids to be buckled in their own seat because that discourages flying and causes more fatalities in alternate transport methods but, the same arguement is considered unimportant regarding security procedures.
lalalalalala not listening
They're not toddlers, they're unsecured ballast.
That opening sentence is very strange, like it was written by a bot. A bot from Kazakhstan.
As America boards Thanksgiving vacation around the country this afternoon...
What the?
Agreed. I am still trying to parse that.
Editing error. Or KMW wrote it on her (not very) "smart" phone while waiting in a security line after downing three cans of (yes) Four Loko.
Somebody fixed it. See? We aren't ineffectual!
But KMW never acknowledges us. My feelings are hurt.
But I'm sure she's thinking about YOU as she falls asleep each night, so there is that...
- only pawn in game of life.
If a passenger jet crashes that seatbelt is about as effective as the TSA. She should focus on getting people in cars bucked up, where it may do some good.
You're correct that when the airplane falls out of the sky, the belt doesn't help.
But I believe that a lot, if not most, passenger injuries don't occur from the crash-n-burn type crashes. Instead, the belt protects against taxiing collisions, turbulence, rough or expedited landings (like Cap'n Sully's water landing) which are pretty analagous to car collisions.
When I write stream-of-consciousness I get sentences like that around the country this afternoon
Just don't try to cross stream without canoe around the country this afternoon.
Why do I have to wear a seatbelt in an airplane again?
When the plane does the death spiral I would like the option of putting one on. Otherwise, I am willing to take my chances on sudden turbulence and bouncing off the roof.
Why do I need a seat? Standing in the aisle is going to be an order of magnitude safer than driving.
As soon as the plane encounters trubulence you'll be flopping around like a rag doll after a date with Pee Wee Herman.
"Trubulence" is probably a typo, but it's still a great word. Oh crap, there's a kid in the seat behind me. Get ready for trubulence.
It's not for a crash. It is for wind shear and turbulence. And in a less-than-total-crash type of emergency landing, it is nice to have people firmly attached to their seats.
Also, when the roof blew off that flight over the pacific, it was the unbuckled flight attendant that got sucked out.
Never happened. Cause we all know that a small hole created by explosive underwear is guaranteed to destroy an airplane.
I'd prefer you don't land on me when we hit the wicked turbulence.
Perhaps we could have "buckled" and "unbuckled" sections, separated by a door or something?
Unsecured dogs in cars are a much more serious problem.
Cats are orders of magnitude worse. Not that I've ever had a cat get under the brake pedal when I was driving or anything...
A cat under the brake pedal is worse than a Four Loko under the belt.
Cat under the pedal is not a problem if you ignore the crunch after the yowl.
Based on the Equal Protection Under The Belt clause of . . . somewhere.
Yeah, I thought that was a pretty bizarre comment. Is she trying to make a 14th amendment case for requiring airlines to require all passengers to have their own seat?
Re: Zeb,
I dunno. This is the first time I hear that the use of a seat belt in an airplane is a civil right.
Equality is the goal. If we're all equally unhappy and unfree...
Why the hell should you want to be happy when so many people are suffering -- are you some kind of happy fascist? Share the happy!
Equally valid under that argument would be removing the requirement for anyone to wear a seat belt. I don't think that's what they were going for though....
There can be no true social justice until every child has his or her own airplane seat.
Provided by the government of course.
It's never the kid for me. It's the 5 foot tall woman/or potbellied hipster in front that dumps her seat. Or the same moron in the back that crosses their legs 47 times kicking the back of my seat.
You know, that poster up there could be construed as child-porn by some very imaginative (and sick) federal bureaucrats.
Ok, so I'm not the only one who looked at the pic and said "wtf?" "Construed" might be too lenient in this case...if the photographer wasn't most likely dead already, I think there might be serious grounds to start an investigation.
"It's the happiest flying.....from the ground up!"
*Double-Take*
Ok, forget the photographer, subpoena that whole damn advertising agency. Once you build the time machine, of course.
Maybe they are adult models wearing childish clothes. You can't see their faces and there is nothing in the shot that provides any absolute sense of scale.
And since when do bare legs count as pornography? (Never mind, I don't want to think about it).
Clearly art and not a photo.
Re: Zeb,
Maybe that or the link fence is very short...
Don Draper is a perv.
I immediately went to check the alt text and laughed.
Me too. I wonder how many Google Image hits this post will get.
I looked at the picture and remembered my childhood - a time when you used to walk out to the Tarmac to see people get on the plane, a time before X-ray scanners at the aeroport, a time when men wore suites to fly. They would than hitch the horses up to the plane, the pilot/wagonmaster would whip the hell out of them, and they would go galloping down the runway, and the plane would slowly.....O!!! I'm getting my centuries mixed up...it was sooo long ago.
I landed in a airport in Siberia that had a horse drawn luggage carousel.
The horses probably require less maintenance than a combustion (especially diesel) vehicle in that climate.
I just mentioned the 1954 John Wayne movie The High and the Mighty in my blog today.
When the plane is in distress in mid-air, one of the passengers panics, pulls out a loaded gun, and shoots it, creating a hole and a decompression problem. Never mind how the passenger got the loaded gun on the plane, though. Eventually he calms down, and the other passengers and crew give him back his gun!
so it was wrong that I was hoping for a breeze to come by?
MOST FUCKED UP AD EVER!!!!
Seriously there is no reason why the middle girl would ever strike the pose she has....
WTF!?!?!
Where in the world do we get the idea that we should encourage the survival of children...we got too many people already. And if they are too stupid to know the dangers of driving, than their demise is all the better...
fresno 'scrooge' dan
decrease the surplus population...and don't we have work houses?
That cost, the F.A.A. surmises, would cause some families to revert to car travel, which is less safe. "Consequently," states the agency in its latest response to the safety board, "entire families would be subject to far higher fatality rates, which would produce a net increase in overall transportation fatalities."
Heads will roll!
Maybe they are adult models wearing childish clothes.
So, I'm merely guilty of a thought crime, then?
I plead entrapment!
I like the picture. If they kick my seat, I may have to spank. Them as well.
Actually, the seat belts are there to make it easier to identify the victims. So don't change seats, or you'll end up in an urn on some stranger's mantel.
That is some quality alt-text there, KWM. Quality.
"That cost, the F.A.A. surmises, would cause some families to revert to car travel, which is less safe. 'Consequently,' states the agency in its latest response to the safety board, 'entire families would be subject to far higher fatality rates'
Small price to pay to keep obnoxious kids off of planes. I'm so down with this technique.
it should be illegal for children to fly until they are 18, just like the foreskin thing.
Will also prevent medical tourists from seeking illicit circumcisions overseas, Win/Win!
...Stephanie M. Tombrello, executive director of SafetyBeltSafe U.S.A....
I hope this woman has no children because the embarrassment they might feel on Career Day at school would be more torturous than being waterboarded.
I just want to thank Reason for providing the best underage, up-skirt I've seen in some time.
I know what outfit my wife's getting for Christmas.
Pilots refer to the lap kids as "meat missiles". Sure it saves you $500, but if it gets gnarly, your kid is going to be bouncing around like a super ball.
Is Michelle Obama a food snob?
Is Katherine Mangu-Ward a fucking idiot? (Hat tip: Matt Welch)
Happy Thanksgiving. Mazel tov, too.