Cheese It, It's The Cops!
Reader Jeffrey Balla hips us to the latest black marketeer prowling the streets of The Big Apple. Listen in as The New York Post reports on "Ronnie" (not his real pseudonym), a purveyor of contraband…grilled cheese sandwiches:
"I'm worried that I'm getting too busy. I'm instituting a friends and friends-of-friends policy," he said. "I kind of want to quit, it's getting too big, but I want to feed these people."
Mostly he's worried that if he gets too big, he's sure to draw the attention of health inspectors.
"It's not cool with the Department of Health," he said. "I don't know how much longer I want to do it because I'm living in fear. It would be such a stupid thing to get in trouble for."
Yes, "Ronnie," it would be stupid to get a mark on your permanent record for selling unlicensed sandwiches, even to ultra-willing buyers (as one satisfied customer put it, "We begged for a delivery"). But there's something far more wrong with a world where "Ronnie" and his clients can't make decisions among themselves without a city bureaucracy interposing itself.
As far as I'm concerned, the only crime here is the New York Post's headline: "He's makin' a gouda livin'"
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I indulged in a hearty guffaw at the alt-text.
Undoubtedly the funniest alt-text this old man has ever seen!
The same way anybody that's a bit too successful draws the attention of gangsters, thieves and robbers. The government is running a racket as well...
MNG will be here shortly to explain to us how this makes us all more free.
Bonus points for MNG if he throws in something about how it would be more utilitarian if Ronnie was required to make sandwiches for anyone regardless of whether they paid for them.
Sure RC. It is real fun until people start dying from unsafe, unregulated cheese sandwich's. You are not free if you are dead. Or something like that.
I think it's more like, "Sure, they take the first one willingly. But cheese has the ability to make you an addict with your first hit. Now that their hooked his $5 sandwich gets more complicated, charging his addicts up to $7 a pop. He's even been seen hanging around schools selling this cheese to our children."
Exactly -- these people are beholden to their cheese-filled gods. You really think that's freedom?
I have been to Wisconsin. No, it's not freedom.
I believe it's:
You're not free unless you're free to die.
According to dimwit MeMe Roth, health is the most important freedom, so I think you're pretty close.
I thought it was Tony who believes that freedom = ability to enjoy life regardless of ability to pay
Both of them are of that mindset.
your all apologists for "Big Velveeta"
Ooooh, "THE KRAFT" sounds like an evil villain or evil secret society bent on our destruction. They are truly behind the underground cheese sandwich game.
He's a murderer.
He's a Muenster!
+100
This makes me proud to live close to a true grilled cheese sammich shop...
Get MeMe Roth on the job. This cheese-pushing bastard is killing children.
These people are so bad at making grilled cheese sandwiches they need them delivered?
Invisible Finger to NYC: DROP DEAD.
Fuck, all this attention is going to bring the man down on my black market PB&J business.
Yo, you need crust on or off?
Wait!
If every grilled cheese has a picture of the Virgin Mary on it, it's a religious artifact and he can claim First Amendment freedoms!
If anyone stings this guy, they are a serious loser.
Dude, you get that swiss in yet? Same stuff as last time, right? Throw me a couple slices on some Wonderbread yo.
How can you people even think of eating something without FDA/SEC/HUD/DARPA approval?
You people are fucking idiots. Bureaucrats should determine what people eat.
Hunger is right-wing!
Hunger is right wing, but starvation is socialist.
So what's centrist? NutraLoaf?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nutraloaf
While I was down in W, D.C.
Certain folks were not glad to see me
I just tried to get out the vote
But some little weasel must 'a dropped 'em a note
It said: "Check out the politics practiced by this oaf
And if they ain't just right, feed him Confinement Loaf."
Hmm. Cracking down on unlicensed grilled cheese. Why didn't we think of that first?
Sandwich bag(gie)s. That's all.
Haven't you people ever been to a Phish show? Illegal grilled cheese vendors (often alongside illegal...MDMA and LSD vendors) are nothing new.
As far as I'm concerned, the only crime here is the New York Post's headline: "He's makin' a gouda livin'"
Incorrect! The real crime is using the headline you did and not using a picture of Bender in the article.
Harold Presents is premiering a mini-documentary featuring an exclusive look inside the Bread.Butter.Cheese. kitchen (and mind) tomorrow on YouTube.com/haroldgroup - And while the kitchen is closed to new "members" we'll let you know you can have a shot at becoming a new BBC customer.
Check it out!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4lTx0cy6CMA
thank u