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Science & Technology

Greedy Companies Cause Global Warming

Katherine Mangu-Ward | 3.16.2007 11:21 AM

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Not News: A senator blames a large corporation for global warming. News: It's Sen. James Inhofe (R-Okla.) and he's blaming the Weather Channel.

Via Gristmill

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Katherine Mangu-Ward is editor in chief of Reason.

Science & TechnologyClimate Change
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  1. Pi Guy   18 years ago

    "What'll happen to the WeatherChannel's ratings when people aren't scared anymore?"

    Well, they can still show the "After the Disaster" specials on the WeatherChannel.

    OT: Suppose we asked the same thing about "The Eternal Word of Truth" channel. Hmmmm...

  2. Mark Borok   18 years ago

    And Darwin conceived the theory of evolution as a way to boost the ratings of the Discovery Channel, which he cleverly anticipated would come into existence around this time.

  3. sage   18 years ago

    global warming hype
    they scare us to raise money
    love my gas guzzler

  4. Truth   18 years ago

    Basically, 99.7% of the "Greenhouse effect" is NATURAL!!!
    http://www.geocraft.com/WVFossils/greenhouse_data.html

  5. Cab   18 years ago

    nice haiku

  6. Nick M.   18 years ago

    I thought haikus wer 3-5-3 not 5-7-5.

  7. de stijl   18 years ago

    NIck M.,

    No. You're thinking of Buddy Ryan's Chicago Bears (ca. 1984) defensive alignment scheme.

  8. Tom   18 years ago

    I hate liberals
    Trashing Capitalism
    and wearing Che shirts

  9. David   18 years ago

    I thought people only watched the weather channel to be scared by the snow forecasts, and maybe the occasion tornado documentary.

  10. Buddy Ryan   18 years ago

    Wasn't that a 4-5 alignment (more specifically, a 4-5-2 alignment)? I forget.

  11. MikeP   18 years ago

    Yeah. Global warming seems a little slow to make the weather channel exciting for the MTV generation.

  12. Bhh   18 years ago

    I thought it was common knowledge that the Weather Channel controls the weather to boost its ratings. Open your eyes people.

  13. jimmydageek   18 years ago

    I only watch the weather channel for their repeated play of "Twister"...

  14. MikeP   18 years ago

    Well, you know... Buddy Ryan originally wanted to have a 10-1 alignment. But then he was informed that Mike Ditka would be coaching from the sidelines and couldn't serve as the 1.

  15. de stijl   18 years ago

    MikeP,

    Were those eleven tiny Ditkas?

  16. jimmydageek   18 years ago

    The Weather Channel
    Plays "Twister" repeatedly.
    Weather Channel Rocks!

  17. Warren   18 years ago

    What'll happen to the WeatherChannel's ratings when people aren't scared anymore?

    Scared of what? The coming of the apocalypse, or having their festival rained out? Somehow I just don't see TWC getting much of a boost from the former. The latter is still going to tune in, global warming or no.

    Then again, I never understood how TWC got paid for anyway. The only time I ever left it on during commercials was when they had some guy about to get blown away by a hurricane.

    Great drama unfolding as the sky gets dark, the rain starts, the wind picks up, and eventually the poor bastard has his arms wrapped around a street lamp while cows are flying past. All for my entertainment! Even then, the all-news networks started putting their own poor bastards on the scene, and I flipped over on the breaks.

    These days I use these here innerweb tubes for my weather prognostication.

  18. de stijl   18 years ago

    Tasty weather girls
    Meterologists are hot
    When they wear glasses

  19. James   18 years ago

    I've said a lot of terrible things about the Weather Channel but I cannot believe that even that locus of Evil would be melting all those glaciers just for ratings.

    Do you all think there might be a religious component in all this? That the Christian fundamentalist view of a 6000-year-old unchanging Earth is threatened by the sight of receding snow cops on mountains?

  20. Warren   18 years ago

    The weather honeys
    Pale by comparison to
    Reason Pillow Girl

  21. NotThatDavid   18 years ago

    Japanese haiku are 3-5-3. It gets expanded to 5-7-5 for Western languages because we have so much less mileage out of a syllable than they do.

  22. de stijl   18 years ago

    Something about Inhofe claiming the The Weather Channel is pimping a false crisis to boost their ratings while on Fox News, strikes me as too precious for words.

  23. MikeP   18 years ago

    Not News: A senator blames a large corporation for global warming. News: It's Sen. James Inhofe (R-Okla.) and he's blaming the Weather Channel.

    To be fair, he is blaming a large corporation for global warming hype.

    I still don't think global warming hype will make people tune into TWC. But I do find it amusing that the second stupidest class of policy motivators in the world interviews the first stupidest class as experts.

  24. de stijl   18 years ago

    NotThatDavid,

    Is the German haiku pattern 17-23-17?

  25. thoreau   18 years ago

    Katherine, you've got the format all wrong. Let me show you how to do this:

    Not news: Politician blaming large corporation for global warming.
    News: It's Sen. James Inhofe.
    Fark.com: He's blaming the Weather Channel.

  26. Warren   18 years ago

    NotThatDavid has
    His head up his ass, So says
    Wikipedia

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haiku

  27. Cab   18 years ago

    the weather channel
    is only slightly less wrong
    than Lou Dobbs Tonight

  28. David   18 years ago

    Is the German haiku pattern 17-23-17?

    No, that's how you audible from a running play to a pass.

  29. NotThatDavid   18 years ago

    I blame Easterbrook's
    crappy football column for
    misleading me, then.

  30. Cab   18 years ago

    I won't be able
    to stop talking like this for
    the rest of the day

  31. jimmydageek   18 years ago

    Thank God it's Friday
    Must take break from Hit and Run
    God Damn, Haiku's suck!

  32. Guy Montag   18 years ago

    Tasty weather girls
    Meterologists are hot
    When they wear glasses

    After meeting Katherine I wondered why she stopped modeling to do this. She would be a hot weatherwoman too!

    Now, everybody stop picking on the Weather Channel. I need to sell Carbon Credits!

    Oh, Katherine, you ought to see my hybrid. It has the coolest sound system. Goes all the way to 11!

  33. vm   18 years ago

    "Haiku's suck"

    what about the Haiku's suck? "Haiku's suck is orange"? the suck of haiku. the wrath of kahn. like that?

    /kicks self

    fun one for warren 🙂

    drag balls over glass
    but not on weather channel
    drag over glacier

    [keed keed]

  34. pinko   18 years ago

    "Big" Weather Channel...
    more retarded excuses
    from Hummer humpers.

  35. Guy Montag   18 years ago

    vm,

    I think drag racing is a carbon negative sport.

  36. VM   18 years ago

    Guy: cool! 🙂

  37. jimmydageek   18 years ago

    VM...yes, the haiku's suck is orange...or, the haiku's suck is greater, if only marginally, than that of VM...:)

    gd spell check thingy...;)

  38. jimmy smith   18 years ago

    Well, I'm grateful for Global Warming, unlike some. I get to use that big box AC behind my house for something other than to put a cooler of beer on when I cut the grass. I didn't bust my butt for 50 years to suffer when the temps get to warm for my comfort. Bring it on!!! Turn that big AC down to about 65. I don't care who/what the cause is.

  39. JLM   18 years ago

    Global warming is a vast Jim Cantori conspiracy to increase the number of hurricanes. You know that guy has a few women in every town on the East and Gulf coasts.

  40. VM   18 years ago

    JDG:

    lol!

    agreed about marginal propensity to suck 🙂

  41. sage   18 years ago

    what the hell is this
    you guys are way off topic
    stick with weather crap

  42. highnumber   18 years ago

    the suck of haiku
    is such an abstract topic
    not good for reason

  43. JohnD   18 years ago

    I'll beleive what the weather channel says about the future effects of global warming when they can get a 5 day forecast right

  44. highnumber   18 years ago

    sage has gotten stuck
    all his comments are haikus
    bad end for the week

  45. ed   18 years ago

    Here's a model to contemplate: warmer weather = expanded growing seasons = more photosynthesis = more carbon dioxide-eating vegetation = less CO2 in the atmosphere. Of course, we'll need more tractors to cut down all the vegetation, and many of us will fart after we eat it. So what will happen? Nobody knows. Am I worried? No. At least not about the heat.
    All that farting, however...

  46. jimmydageek   18 years ago

    Hurricane coming
    Weather Channel says to leave
    Shilling for big oil

  47. highnumber   18 years ago

    sickness is spreading
    i could do this all day long
    somebody help me!

  48. highnumber   18 years ago

    don't you understand?
    there is no global warming
    where is ron bailey?

  49. Akira MacKenzie   18 years ago

    Clueless right winger
    Knows not science from his ass
    Evolution is fact too

  50. violent_k   18 years ago

    I cannot help you
    The disease has gone too far
    I suggest we drink

  51. Guy Montag   18 years ago

    I'll beleive what the weather channel says about the future effects of global warming when they can get a 5 day forecast right

    Man, now you did it! We are going to be flooded by 'climatology' worshipers telling us how it is 'different' and comparing it to meterology is just 'dim'. Why? Because they say so!

    ed,

    Here's a model to contemplate: warmer weather = expanded growing seasons = more photosynthesis = more carbon dioxide-eating vegetation = less CO2 in the atmosphere. Of course, we'll need more tractors to cut down all the vegetation, and many of us will fart after we eat it. So what will happen? Nobody knows. Am I worried? No. At least not about the heat.
    All that farting, however...

    This is my favorite global warming model. (work safe) Of course, the AWG people are great in filling in Step Two 🙂

  52. big oil   18 years ago

    silly 'mericans
    all your base belong to us
    as does ron bailey

  53. ed   18 years ago

    Okay, I give in.
    Haiku has captured me too.
    I will die, I hope.

  54. highnumber   18 years ago

    who is guy montag?
    what do people think of him?
    obnoxious blowhard

  55. jimmydageek   18 years ago

    Guy montag no fun.
    Spoils fun of haiku posters
    with non haiku rant.

  56. MadTom   18 years ago

    "Haiku's suck"

    No apostrophe.
    Plural is "haiku"; no S.
    Where's my grammar gun?

  57. highnumber   18 years ago

    i am sorry, guy
    like shooting fish in barrels
    such easy targets

  58. jimmydageek   18 years ago

    thank you, dear mad tom
    for pointing out my errors
    give us dumb folk break

  59. katsumi   18 years ago

    Haiku abuses
    flom Gaijin telitoly
    food not dericious

  60. Shocked   18 years ago

    Shocked, I am, so shocked
    Past Ron-Bailey-esque "mistakes"
    Continue to ring

  61. highnumber   18 years ago

    set aside one day
    comment in only haiku
    let's say march sixteenth

  62. Stevo Darkly   18 years ago

    Global disaster!
    Yet you talk football, weather babes?
    Focus, guys, focus!

    ... on weather babes, sure!
    (I pleasured myself to an
    Incoming cold front)

  63. VM   18 years ago

    yea Stevo is back
    Master of teh Intertubes
    His wit knows no bounds

  64. Stevo Darkly   18 years ago

    Thank you, Mister Moose
    And for alerting me to
    This here haiku fest

    set aside one day
    comment in only haiku
    let's say march sixteenth

    Good thought, highnumber
    -- and eat green sushi for a
    Nice St. Haiku's Day!

  65. STEPHEN THE GOLDBERGER   18 years ago

    For all that I know
    The Super Bowl Shuffle crew
    caused Global Warming

  66. highnumber   18 years ago

    avoid green sushi
    unless it's the wasabi
    (really horseradish)

  67. violent_k   18 years ago

    I think Guy has left
    did not enjoy the haiku's
    should we follow him?

  68. crimethink   18 years ago

    Global warming seems a little slow to make the weather channel exciting for the MTV generation.

    Strangely, I'm pretty sure the Weather Channel has more music these days than MTV...

  69. VM   18 years ago

    violent k, look!
    no apostrophe plural
    read what MadTom wrote!

  70. B.P.   18 years ago

    Superbowl Shuffle
    sequestered carbon by
    going to landfill

  71. violent_k   18 years ago

    Hit post with much haste
    before reading all comments
    I need a damn life

  72. VM   18 years ago

    Not at all VK
    follow haiku-number's lead
    have good Friday Fun!

  73. The Real Bill   18 years ago

    I haven't written a haiku since sixth grade, and I'm not going to write one now. You guys keep it up, though; I'm busting a gut! (ROTFLMFAO)

  74. Mad Mike   18 years ago

    OK, haiku fans, let's cut to the Weather Channel chase:

    Stephanie Abrams
    Kristina Abernathy
    Sharon Resultan

  75. haiku-number   18 years ago

    Mad Mike is genius
    or watches too much tv
    either way, good job

  76. Akira MacKenzie   18 years ago

    Whoops... I miscounted, big time:

    Clueless right winger
    Knows not science from his ass
    Darwin was right too

  77. Jim Walsh   18 years ago

    Jeanetta Jones...WOW!
    When she says "Raaaaaaaa-in" with that drawl,
    South rises agin'

  78. Sam-Hec   18 years ago

    Bunnies Don't Haiku

  79. Armed and Hammered   18 years ago

    What'll happen to (insert government agency here) when people aren't scared anymore?

  80. apollos   18 years ago

    Not all Greens are red, but it's not just the color-blind that have trouble telling the difference. Check out http://www.4globalwarming.com

  81. Genghis Kahn   18 years ago

    cannot haiku,
    all of you, hear me!
    without zen

    the real bill
    wants to haiku, with-
    out haiku-ing

    hn, he wants
    to fart, without farting
    bloat bloat bloat

    genghis kahn he
    on road and miss whole
    party so sorry

  82. gucci wallet   15 years ago

    wow, cool, yep this is a great site. I enjoy.

  83. louis vuitton for sale   14 years ago

    I haven't written a haiku since sixth grade

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