Live Action Simpsons

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Definitely worth watching, even better than the Top 100 Chuck Norris Facts, though the UK location slightly breaks the illusion.

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  1. WHOA! OK that was pretty cool

  2. Oh, that was so cool! You rock, Cavanaugh.

  3. Worst episode ever!

  4. Worst episode ever!

  5. D’oh! Stupid double post…

  6. The one fact they left out about Chuck Norris: He ain’t Jack Bauer.

  7. I don’t give a damn about the Simpsons, so I might as well come up with a few CN facts, to wit:

    1. Chuck Norris does not believe in God. God believes in Chuck Norris.*

    2. If you go to the exact middle of the Sahara Desert, you will see a sign. That sign will say ?Chuck Norris farted here.?

    3. If you go to the northernmost point of the Grand Canyon, you will see a sign. That sign will say ?Chuck Norris urinated here.?

    4. If you sail to the exact middle of the mouth of the Amazon River, you will see a sign (a floating sign). That sign will say ?Four thousand miles upstream, Chuck Norris is taking a piss.?

    5. Reality bites, but only because Chuck Norris told it to.

    6. The dinosaurs did not die out because of a meteorite. They died out because Chuck Norris got tired of their sass.

    7. Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award, because Academy Awards are for acting. Chuck Norris does not act. Chuck Norris is.

    8. The stars in the ?P? on the cover of Playboy do not indicate the number of times Hugh Hefner has had sex with the playmate. They indicate the number of orgasms the playmate has upon hearing Chuck?s name.

    9. Chuck Norris does not speak. His (one) facial expression intimidates people into guessing (correctly) his thoughts.

    10. Chuck Norris does not give autographs. He does, however, take names.

    *Surely this has been said of some southern football coach?

  8. ZZzz.
    Give it a rest with the Chuck Norris. It had its five seconds of fame.
    The live action Simpsons is way better. It didn’t give me gay.

  9. Theory:

    Chuck Norris and Gary Busey are both of Irish and Cherokee descent. They’re both from the southwest US. I believe they may be distant cousins.

  10. Jamie:

    “It didn’t give me gay.”

    Uh, so what did?

  11. Funny, but not as funny as Young Chuck Norris.

  12. The best thing you can say about Chuck Norris, is that he isn’t Jean-Claud Van Damme.

    Hooray for live-action Simpsons

  13. “Chuck Norris and Gary Busey are both of Irish and Cherokee descent. They’re both from the southwest US. I believe they may be distant cousins.”

    Except that Chuck Norris doesn’t play someone in a Turkish movie who removes organs from Iraqi POWS without anaesthetic — he does that for a hobby!

  14. In that clip, Homer drives a Lada Riva. Quite fitting.

    She’ll go 300 hectares on a single tank of kerosene. Put it in H!

  15. The best thing you can say about Chuck Norris, is that he isn’t Jean-Claud Van Damme.

    My Bunny Hun is in love with Chuck Norris. Should I kick his ass or kick her ass?

  16. “She’ll go 300 hectares on a single tank of kerosene.”

    Isn’t a hectare a measure of area rather than distance?

  17. I got gay watching “Fried Green Tomatoes” and listening to old Chet Baker recordings.

  18. Should I kick his ass or kick her ass?

    Why choose?

  19. That live action intro is pretty amusing. I like the fact Homer is driving a Lada.

  20. She’ll go 300 hectares on a single tank of kerosene. Put it in H! -Dave Straub

    Isn’t a hectare a measure of area rather than distance? -SR

    Yeah. But the mistake is in the original quote…
    http://www.snpp.com/episodes/9F07

    I’m sure the manual will indicate which lever is the velocitator and which the deceleratrix…

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