Eat Not To Dullness

Jared has a last name, but like Michelangelo, Madonna, and Saddam, he doesn't need one. When I say "Jared," you know I'm not talking about actor Jared Leto or Pulitzer Prize-winning author Jared Diamond. Those guys have their constituencies, but uninym status? There's only one Jared who can make that claim: Jared the Subway Guy, the innovative weight-loss adventurer who, thanks to his ability to shed pounds while eating nothing but fast food, stands as the most improbably enduring icon this new millennium has produced.

Go ahead, say how much you hate Jared, how indifferent you are to his underperformed lean-sandwich pitches, how stupid the American people are for liking him, how you've actually never heard of the mild-mannered diet king, and so on. But can you explain his extraordinary popularity (now entering its sixth year of dully people-friendly megasuccess)? At The Rake, Greg Beato looks for an answer, in a profile of Subway's 600 Million Dollar Man.

Comments

[methodman]

heh...Jared has aides.

[The Metaphysician]

Jared seems a nice enough guy, but does allowing each kind of sub to be served toasted or untoasted really double your selection? Does toasting a sub change its essence, its innermost quiddity?

[xpanda]

True story: while in Vegas back in July, I dined at a restaurant and saw Jared and some friends sitting at the table immediately beside mine.

He was eating a 16-ounce slab of prime rib.

[dead_elvis]

Jared has a last name, but like Michelangelo, Madonna, and Saddam, he doesn't need one. When I say "Jared," you know I'm not talking about actor Jared Leto or Pulitzer Prize-winning author Jared Diamond. Those guys have their constituencies, but uninym status? There's only one Jared who can make that claim: Jared the Subway Guy,

Actually, for Mac users who have been around a while, probably the name Jared means singing:

"While Central America has seen more than its share of atrocities in recent years; never before has a lovely Guatemalan folk song been brutalized as thoroughly as by the vocal stylings of JARED, the Head of Security at FREEVERSE SOFTWARE.

Like an angry Immigration officer, Jared's distinctive rendition grabs us, slaps us around, threatens to cavity search us and ultimately demands our passport be issued from that same circle of hell from which his voice originates.

Never has the mating of cats sounded so melodic as after one has listened to 'El Carnicero de Canciones,' the 'Butcher of Songs,' as Jared was known in Guatemala. Yet, this is perhaps the worst part; one is somehow drawn to his song, playing it over and over again. So listen to, 'Shala-uuugh', and suffer -- for this is art. "

[dead_elvis]

dang, where did that superfluous 'probably' come from?

[celebrity sleuth]

Jared's the Man! Next time you're out that way, you can find him throwing down some serious hot dog madness at the Puka Dog on the south coast of Kauai.

[Ken Shultz]

I've expounded on this topic elsewhere on this forum. ...I believe one of the reasons Jared remains so popular is because, like Richard Simmons, Al Roker, Kirsty Alley, et. al., he's still fat. He's still a lard ass, people--that's the way we like our diet pitch, from people that are big and fat!

The one that takes the cake is Star Jones. She recently wrote a book , "Shine : A Physical, Emotional, and Spiritual Journey to Finding Love". From the editorial review at Amazon:

"Shine is divided into three main sections, each exploring core issues of interest to women. Part One guides women toward being their most attractive physical selves using Star's personal secrets on losing weight and finding hair, fashion, and makeup chic (inexpensively)."

That would all be fine and dandy except for one thing. ...it looks like Star Jones had bariatric surgery! Google "Star Jones Bariatric Surgery" for yourself and see! That's right, a woman who appears to have had bariatric surgery is giving advice, her personal secrets, to the women of America on losing weight! How much you wanna bet she makes no mention of bariatric surgery in her stupid book? ...How much? And let me tell you somethin'--bariatric surgery ain't inexpensive.

So, yeah, Jared's still popular, damn it, but don't buy into the mass hypnosis. The emperor's got no clothes on, and Jared's still fat! So, Jared, or "Fat Boy" as I like to call you, I'm tired of hearin' your pitch! Just 'cause you lost 500 lbs., or however much you lost, that doesn't mean you're not fat! Why don't you go out and get some exercise for that big, fat ass of yours? ...and while you're out, don't stop by the Subway and get that foot-long meatball with extra cheese, a bag of Cheetos and the Big Gulp, with Cherry, not Diet, Coke in it, like you usually do.

...You lard ass!

[Conrad Bain]

It is my opinon that Jarerd is the antichrist.

[Wanna Bet?]

Well I'm wearin my Levi's
Lee Hee Hee Hee Hee Vi's - Haw Haw!
Lee Hee Hee Hee Hee Vi's - Haw Haw!
Lee Hee Hee Hee Hee
Lee Hee Hee Hee Hee Vi's

Now I bet about 20 % of you know where that came from - but what's that worth except for some blank stares from the other 80?

Just because something sticks in your head doesn't make it "enduring" Just means it's annoying enough to fuck your mind into paying attention to it over and over again.

Go outside and take a hike deep into a forest if you've become that familiar with a sandwich hawker.

[Ken Shultz]

Go outside and take a hike deep into a forest if you've become that familiar with a sandwich hawker.

They run his commercial during football games, dude! ...anybody with a team's seen freakin' Jared ten times within three hours, sixteen times a year.

...and they know he's faaaaaaaaaaat!

[jroh]

I was wondering how the hell Star Jones became a celebrity so I wiki'd it and found out that she's a former lawyer who was hired by Inside Edition to cover the OJ Simpson trial. Jeez, as if OJ didn't already have enough to account for...

[Stevo Darkly]

Jared is Everyman. He embodies our dreams. He is Ulysses come home to Ithaca, his seemingly insurmountable quest achieved. He is the hero to be hailed.

He's not as cool as the little Buddy Lee jeans guy, though.

[SixSigma]

Random thought:

You ever wonder what lengths SubWay might go to in order to help Jared if he ever started gaining weight again? Would this be a case of acceptable torture?

[SixSigma]

Ken -

Ken -

No doubt on the 10 times in 3 hours bit about football. Hell - the playoofs are now verging on 4 hours long. Not to mention after 4 full minutes of commerical because possession of the ball changed, you come back to the game with 3 corporate logos and an additional 30 seconds to explain that each is a sponsor of the game. Which of course we knew as they have the most commericals on during the game as well.

One of my new favorite sayings, paraphrasing a popular hockey parable is, "I was watching some commericals the other day and a football game broke out."

Luckily though - thanks to the DVR - I simply start watching the game 30 to 45 minutes after live start time and can skip most commercials.

[clemente]

other commercial ideas for jared...

"green beret punches jared in heart so hard that he dies"

"wife of jared's neighbor is pregnant. everyone knows it was jared. loud knocks on jared's front door. as jared slides pistol slowly into mouth, cut back and forth to footage of jared biting into 6" turkey sub"

http://achewood.com/index.php?date=01172003

http://achewood.com/index.php?date=01212003

[Douglas Fletcher]

K Schultz, it really sounds like your blood sugar is getting waaay too low. I'd suggest you eat a bit steak and salad asap -- throw some red beets & croutons on that thing or else maybe a baked potato with sour cream, yeah, that'll settle you down. Wash it down with some good beer just to be safe.

[The Wine Commonsewer]

It'd take more than lard butt Jared to convince me to eat a Subway sandwich. I can't believe those jokers are still in biz.

[Rhywun]

Jared is "popular" because his story of losing hundreds of pounds by doing nothing but eating Subway sandwiches is too good to be true. I'm not buying it.

[Douglas Fletcher]

Maybe it works because their sandwiches suck so bad, if you ate nothing but that crap for weeks on end, after a few days you'd just be eating enough to keep from feeling hungry, at which point you might actually start to lose weight.

[Rick Barton]

A couplea years ago I heard on CNBC that they found a sassy drop dead gorgeous and thin gal who was an older MIT grad student and who lost like a gazillion pounds while eating lotsa subway to be Jared's counter-part. But no matter how much money they tried to coax her with, she didn't work out for commercials cuz she wouldn't compromise at all about her punked-out looks, or avoid using "fuck" and "shit" when asked to tell in her own words about how much she loved the sandwiches. Seems that the personal appearances woulda been a little rough too...I became infatuated just hearing about her.

[Mo]

Rick,
A drop dead gorgeous MIT student? Maybe Subway couldn't run the ads for fear of violating the Endagered Species Act. Any idea on her name or what years she went there?

[The Wine Commonsewer]

Somehow punked out looks and drop dead gorgeous don't seem to go well together in the same sentence.

[Twba]

Jared is "popular" because his story of losing hundreds of pounds by doing nothing but eating Subway sandwiches is too good to be true. I'm not buying it.

When he first showed up on commercials, I read that he walked all the way to Subway for lunch and then walked all the way home. It might not be the sandwich that led to the weight loss.

[Danimaux]

Twba:

"Ironically enough, the local Subway, which was literally on the other side of a wall of Jared?s apartment, was part of the problem."

I doubt the walking helped much.

[nostradumbass]

Ahh, Subway. What nasty crap you sell! Like what is with that cheese that makes me want to shave my tongue after eating it? Or that slimy bologna on the cold cut combo? Those withered meatball nuggets in the sugary sauce? Oh, and that 'vegetarian burger' thing? Good lord, what was that made out of?

I'm a member at a bunch of bodybuilding boards (because I am a bodybuilding hobbyist) and invariably there will be a thread were someone ponders if it's okay to eat fast food while bulking and someone will eventually recommend Subway as a 'healthy fast-food' because with the right condiments etc. you can get a sub that easily clears 1000 calories. One supposes that if you were actually trying to 'lose weight' by eating at Subway, one must eat nothing but dry and cheeseless turkey subs. No mayo or dressing? I don't think I could make it a week before the suicide attempts started...

[Twba]

"Ironically enough, the local Subway, which was literally on the other side of a wall of Jared?s apartment, was part of the problem."

Yeah, I saw that. I'm not sure who is bullshitting me. Did he just walk downstairs to get a sub or did he walk a mile? If I really cared, I'd google for more info. I don't care. It was news to me that Jared was still on TV. Laugh all you want, I haven't watched a football game in years.

[wellfellow]

"I'm a member at a bunch of bodybuilding boards (because I am a bodybuilding hobbyist)"

Didn't someone just ask the other day what happened to the carpet-humper?

[wellfellow]

"Laugh all you want, I haven't watched a football game in years."

I've watched two in my entire life.

[Ed]

I watched three a few days ago but it was actually only one. It took two days. Between the commercials there was intermittent action on the field. Drinks were consumed. Time was killed by all.

[Alan Vanneman]

What all this proves, Tim, is that you're more boring than Jared. Deal with it!

[Evan]

Jared's "popularity" is due, I think, to people's interest in him, which in turn is a result of their hatred for him. Though, to be fair, I can't say that 600 million dollars in exchange for a bunch of strangers hating you is such a bad deal.

Me, I just want to bust up his goofy mouth. I could care less about his weight loss, etc., I just hate that twisty, half-hare-lipped mouth of his his.

Anyway, like another commenter said, who actually watches commercials anymore? Dish Network only charges an extra $5/month for 2 DVR receivers. Between that and Netflix, it's rare that I see an actual commercial all the way through anymore. So jabber on about your bullshit weight loss all you want, you hare-lipped lardass, I won't be watching.

[Jeff P.]

For the record, Star Jones now looks like a cross between the baby from Eraserhead and that midget that used to be on the Howard Stern show. That's not weight loss; that's voluntary disfigurment.

Also, some other products could have cashed in on Jared's success. A steady diet if Subway must have kept him on the john a lot. I'm certain he used quite a few bottles of Drano to clear his no doubt frquently shit-choked toilet.

Here's a slogan "Nothing Shits like Subway"

[D.A. Ridgely]

Greg Beato writes:

Those tiny wire-rim glasses of his? Definitely blue-state. The fact that he once weighed 425 pounds? You can?t get any more red-state than that!

Fergawdsakes, nobody tell Ted Kennedy!

[nostradumbass]

I must state for the record that I am NOT the carpet-humping guy, though I aspire to his burley physique wrought through nothing more than mastery of his own bodyweight! I do shave my head though. *cough*cough*

Back OT, many years ago I mentioned to my wifething that it was astounding that this idiot, Jared, was willing to offer himself up as a figure of scorn and ridicule to shill for such a crappy restaurant. I guess the payoff explains that. I wonder if part of his contract states that he can't actually get into shape because that would impose unreasonable expectations for Subway's subs. Our society's equation of 'lack of visible bodyfat = healthy body' is rather... misguided. Not to mention the obsession of the raw number of lbs/weight that people have (see: the Biggest Loser). I had a doctor tell me I was verging on morbidly obese because I tip the scale at 209. But my BF% is like around 13 or so! It's bad when not even doctors can get it right.

But really, so Jared no longer weighs four hundred lbs, but does anyone actually think he looks 'healthy'?

[Rhywun]

If I really cared, I'd google for more info. I don't care.

Yeah, me neither. This just fits in with all the various bullshit "miracle" diets I'm so sick of hearing about, the ones where they admit in tiny print that it doesn't actually work unless "part of a vigorous fitness routine" or some such.

Here's a slogan "Nothing Shits like Subway"

The "BMT" isn't half bad. Maybe because you can't actually taste the individual ingredients...? But the overall effect is acceptable. I couldn't eat it more than once every couple weeks, though.

[sage]

"Here's a slogan "Nothing Shits like Subway""

Funniest thing I ever read on a bathroom wall was in a stall at a Wendy's I worked at in Alaska:

"Here's one for Big Dave's Deluxe."

[dhex]

"Somehow punked out looks and drop dead gorgeous don't seem to go well together in the same sentence."

that's just cause you're old. sorry.

subway = SUBhumanWAYtomakesandwiches

[Pro Libertate]

The Jared campaign doesn't bother me. It works, and it generally lacks the over-the-top B.S. of most marketing. Yes, the whole concept is a little silly, but anyone who goes out to eat to lose weight has some issues to resolve, anyhow. Subway sandwiches are a long shot from being really good sandwiches, but, granting their fastfood status, they aren't that bad. Of course, if I ran Subway, I'd deepfry everything--fried BMT, fried pickles, fried cookies.

We're such wusses--if we had any cajones, we'd eat plain white rice with chopsticks (and nothing else but water) when we wanted to lose weight. Kind of a Viet Cong Diet Plan.

[Jennifer]

Their fake-crabmeat sandwiches aren't too bad, especially on those spicy Italian rolls. But if I had to choose between being fat and eating there every day, I'd just practice making moo-sounds.

[Sandy]

I'm so cool in my lack of consumption that I don't exist. Beat that.

[Rick Barton]

Sandy,

Got any pics of your non-existance?

[downstater]

But really, so Jared no longer weighs four hundred lbs, but does anyone actually think he looks 'healthy'?

of course he doesn't look like he's about to place at ironman hawaii, but he looks a lot healthier than 400+ lbs.

i sort of took the whole point to be: if it can make this really fat guy look like a normal schlub, then imagine what it can do for a normal schlub like yourself!

i too remember the early commercials in which he said something about "lots of walking." i don't remember if it was to subway or not - but it still alluded to at least some exercise.

unfortunately for subway, no gimmick will work because quizno's is so friggin good. mmmmmm. quizno's.

[B.P.]

I'm a little disappointed in this forum. A post about Jared the Subway guy prompts 42 comments right off the top, while a post the other day about Muslim clerical attitudes toward anal and oral sex nets only 20 comments on a slow Hit & Run day? Let's get our priorities in order, folks.

PS ~ I dig the Subway... fast food with plenty of veggies as opposed to a wilted fragment of romaine lettuce.

[Rick Barton]

...Make that: "Got any pics of your *non-existence*"

Damn it! Spelling goof..

[Rick Barton]

Mo,

It was a couplea years ago and Joe Kernan described her as a late twenties grad student. He and one or two of the other guys at CNBC that day seemed to concur on her punk yet stunning appearance. They might well have mentioned her name but if they did, I spaced it. If I ever find out, I'll letya know. And if I ever cross her path, I'll try to setya up cuz I'm probably a tad too old for her. BTW, Kernan went to grad school at MIT as well.

[MAS]

I think they hired him as he is now, fed him Weight Gain 4000 until he plumped-up to 400 pounds, took some pictures, and then let the weight that his body didn't want just come off while feeding him Subway during that period. At least that's how I would have done it.

[methodman]

Somehow punked out looks and drop dead gorgeous don't seem to go well together in the same sentence.

I have one or two words for you, depending how you count, TWC: SuicideGirls. (First page is barely safe for work, and much of the rest is NSFW.)

[Pro Libertate]

Although I don't doubt Jared's story is true, it is also true that there is an interesting near-fraud commonly used to sell diet pills and the like. Find an athlete who has suffered some severe medical condition that has laid him/her up for many months. Take photos. Allow athlete to recover and return to athletic lifestyle. Take photos. Credit recovery with little yellow pill you gave athlete with a check for $4,000. Take photos. Show on TV. Fool the masses. Collect lucre. Repeat.

[Don Mynack]

Funniest thing ever heard at a Subway (true story).

Guy in front of me: "I'd like a 12-inch Italian".

Guy behind counter: "As would we all, my friend. As would we all."

[Ken Shultz]

I'm a little disappointed in this forum. A post about Jared the Subway guy prompts 42 comments right off the top, while a post the other day about Muslim clerical attitudes toward anal and oral sex nets only 20 comments on a slow Hit & Run day?

mmmkay...

If you don't think Jared's still fat, then you're not a real libertarian.

[rob]

Wow. FINALLY! Someone Ken Schultz hates more than he hates me...

I guess I don't have to worry about him tracking me down and hacking me to pieces until I read that someone's already beaten Jared to death with a stale Subway sandwich.

I just don't understand the ire, really. He's just this guy, y'know?

[Kip]

WWJD?

[Ed]

WWJD?
He would be nailed to a specially reinforced cross and die for our gastronomical sins.

[The Wine Commonsewer]

that's just cause you're old. sorry

You got that right..but, hmmm, okay, I'll give you that one. I do think those Lillix chicks are kind of hot, does that count?

subway = SUBhumanWAYtomakesandwiches

Dhex, you have captured the essence of Subway

Suicide Girls? They call them that because you'd rather commit suicide than do one of them.

Will Rogers was right when he opined that when it comes to marriage and politics, there is no accounting for taste or something like that.

I hereby bequeath all of my share of Suicide Girls to Methodman.

[Pro Libertate]

Turn our waddle into wine?

[The Wine Commonsewer]

Hey, Methodman! SG is slipping, I actually saw one naked chick there who had no visible lip ring, no belly jewelry, no tattoos, no facial piercings, & no nipple rings.

[The Wine Commonsewer]

I wasn't going to do this but changed my mind. The Chicas Bonitas site has about 10,000 beautiful women in various states of being in their altogether. The site is tastefully done. No porn, no guys.

Sorry ladies, please forgive.

[Stevo Darkly]

"Somehow punked out looks and drop dead gorgeous don't seem to go well together in the same sentence.

[The Wine Commonsewer]

Stevo, Rush Limbaugh once said that Chrissie Hynde (in her prime) looked like you'd get some really awful disease if you slept with her but that you didn't care.

[The Wine Commonsewer]

Oh yeah, the chick you linked to is definitely hot.

[Ken Shultz]

Wow. FINALLY! Someone Ken Schultz hates more than he hates me...

I don't hate you, rob. I just think you're a weenie.

...I think Jared's a fat weenie.

[kevrob]

Synchronicity alert:

The local UHF station that plays South Park reruns aired the episode starring Mr. Fogle at 3 a.m. this morning.

I like the fact that Subway will put A-1 sauce on your steak sandwich.

Kevin

[ChrisO]

Ok, this is total 100% rumor, so take it for what it's worth. But a knowledgeable old friend and I were talking about the meat used in dorm food (trust me, it was relevant at the time), you know, "Grade A" and such, and she told me that Subway used beef marked "Grade D but edible." Again, this could be total bullshit, but she seemed pretty sure--if I recall, she had a relative in the foodservice industry.

[ChrisO]

Hope I didn't ruin anyone's lunch...

[Starboard]

Wow, Jared's been around that long? Remember they had those twins who pretty much looked like black Jareds and tried to, I guess, reinforce the whole subway dieting thing, they didn't last very long...perhaps an indication of racism in American society?

[Stevo Darkly]

For what it's worth, sometime in the past few years Subway did undertake a noticeable upgrade in the quality of the cold cuts they use. Probably in response to competition from Quizno's, I think.

[The Wine Commonsewer]

Definitely competition from Quiznos et al, but you're right, Subway has improved (marginally)

Pretty sure that Grade D is urban mythology. My girlfriend's kids used to say that about the cafeteria food 25 years ago. I think there are really only a very few USDA grades, choice, prime, standard........(Select is not a USDA grade)

[rob]

"I don't hate you, rob. I just think you're a weenie." - Ken Schultz

Hmmm... Looks like Ken's still got it.

And by "it" I mean he's still got a not-even-sharp-for-a-5th-grader wit. (5th grade being, in my experience, the last time someone used the word "weenie" to insult anyone.)

Some things never change.

[Gmack]

Jared isnt well muscled or anything, but at 180 pounds and a 34 pants, how could you say hes a "fat" "lardass"? ( Even though I AM fairly well muscled)If I weighed 180 I would look like a skeleton. And its not like I am built like Nikolay Valuev or anything- I am just a regulation size 6-footer. I know there are "skinny-fat" people, but I dont know how any non-dwarf grown man could be considered a lardass at under 200 pounds.

[Jared Fogle]

My idea of a balanced diet is to have all my favorite red meats in one sandwich.

[The Wine Commonsewer]

Real Man fruit: Orange Crush

[Sandy]

Rick:

Here's your pic.

I must be alone in finding Subway a pleasant alternative to other fast food restaurants when on the road. I also find Jared completely inoffensive. It helps if you know that any diet can help you lose weight if you keep at it. It's coming off it without an increased exercise regimen that will balloon you right back up.

It's like you people were considering Subway for the Michelin guide or something. Lighten up.

[Rick Barton]

Sandy,

Wow, that's hot. You're so not there but you're one Hell of an essence. I just wanna get close to your void. And you're a libertarian, hmm...Hey, I used to not exist, so we kinda have something else in common...

[Rick Barton]

The Wine Commonsewer:

Suicide Girls? They call them that because you'd rather commit suicide than do one of them.

That's funny. I emphatically disagree, but that's funny.

[Ken Shultz]

So let's say you were never with a punk rock girl in your wild youth, just for the sake of argument...

Too bad! If you were never with a punk rock girl when you were a rebellious teen/post teen, then I guess you never will be with a crazy ass, punk rock girl. ...I guess some people, at the end of their lives, will end up in a nursing home somewhere, staring at the ceiling, unable to speak, thinking to themselves, "I am so glad I never hooked up with a crazy ass, punk rock girl."

...For the rest of you, those of you who had somethin' better to do than run around with crazy ass, punk rock girls back in the eighties and early nineties, there's the Suicide Girls website.

No, it's not like bein' there, with all the fights and cops and thrills, etc., but old folks might relate to the site as somethin' like lookin' at a friend's old snapshots of naked hippie chicks from way back in the sixties or somethin'. Hippie chicks--ahem, 'scuse the term, um..., the aesthetic sense of liberated women of the sixties wouldn't really have done it for me.

[gutta percha]

I guess the visceral hatred that Jared induces in some people (see above) is part of the reason for his success as a marketing tool. He generates buzz.

I can take or leave Subway. We've had lots of better sandwich places come and go in my town, but Subway endures. The thing I can't figure out is: if Subways go to all the trouble of making their own bread, why is it such lifeless dry cakey bread? If they had good chewy crusty lardy french baguettes, that would improve their sandwiches 100%.

But quality of food has little to do with franchise restaurant success. Go to any big mall food court. You'll see people choose to stand in long lines for McDonalds, when there is _nobody_ waiting at the other franchises. Very weird.

[Ken Shultz]

Just to be clear, I don't hate Jared. I think he's fat.

...and I think it's funny.

[The Wine Commonsewer]

Hippie chicks--ahem

But Ken, the chicks were bra-less, all the time.

As an aside, I find it delightful that those styles are back. I walk around trying to unobtrusively gawk at young chicks wearing bell bottoms, bare bellies, with flat-ironed hair and I SWEAR I dated some of them. Then it hits me: Dude, that was their mom, or maybe their granny Auuuuugggghhhhh!

Last week I got a citation for Mopery With Intent to Gawk at the local mall.

BTW, true hippie chicks didn't really do it for most of us old guys either. Something about taking a bath once in a while that appeals to me.

In a nutshell, what makes *IT* happen for any of us is often related to what was swirling around us as we came of age.

[The Wine Commonsewer]

Sandy, that really was funny. It took me a moment to clue in but then I laughed out loud.

Rick B,

Thanks. Glad you got a chuckle. Apparently there's a whole lot of guys besides you who appreciate the Suicide Girl look and that's cool.

Gutta, I think the phenom you describe comes about because Mickie Dees is very predictable. You pretty much know what you're going to get and some people like that.

I keep thinking that McDonalds food used to be better but I can't prove that (except the fries, that's a fact).

[Rick Barton]

Wine Commonsewer,

Yeah, a few of those Suicide Girls don't appeal to me either although I find most of them to be quite hot, or as you and I used to say, "foxy".

[Ken Shultz]

In a nutshell, what makes *IT* happen for any of us is often related to what was swirling around us as we came of age.

Yeah, flappers probably drove Grandpa Shultz wild! Here's to mad as hell, wild women of youth, of each and every era.

...They make the rockin' world go 'round!

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