The Moon Is a Harsh Patron (Your Tax Dollars At Work Edition)
The Washington Times reminds us that Laurie Anderson, NASA's first (and likely hopefully) last "artist-in-residence" has delivered on her $20,000 subsidy with the performance piece, "The End of the Moon":
"Nominally, [sez the "O Superman" auteur], it's my official report as the first NASA artist in residence, but the stories include things about war, my dog, trees, people I've known, theories."
The Times quotes from the piece:
"Americans say that everyone hates us because we are rich, democratic and free. They remind me of those girls who are convinced people hate them because they are beautiful. The truth is everyone hates them because they are [expletive deleted]."
Whole Times bit here.
I'll note that the Times is responsible for deleting the expletive, not moi. Indeed, I'm left wondering what the offending phrase was, though I'm too busy trying to get through my eight-track of Rick Wakeman's White Rock, the official soundtrack to the 1976 Winter Olympics (zzzz) to track down another piece of commissioned music that sounds like it really sucks. (Besides, didn't Dino effectively close out the moon as an inspiration for music?)
But let's give NASA some credit here: Every dollar they spent on Anderson was a dollar less they spent on killing people, as National Review's John Derbyshire would have it.
Me? I'm waiting to see what kind of art the Elvis of private space exploration, the great Burt Rutan, commissions. Here's hoping it's a black velvet portrait of him dancing on NASA's grave.
Editor's Note: As of February 29, 2024, commenting privileges on reason.com posts are limited to Reason Plus subscribers. Past commenters are grandfathered in for a temporary period. Subscribe here to preserve your ability to comment. Your Reason Plus subscription also gives you an ad-free version of reason.com, along with full access to the digital edition and archives of Reason magazine. We request that comments be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of reason.com or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment and ban commenters for any reason at any time. Comments may only be edited within 5 minutes of posting. Report abuses.
Please
to post comments
Gotta love Derb.
"Every dollar they spent on Anderson was a dollar less they spent on killing people"
For a minute, I thought you were alluding to
The deleted word is "bitches" according to this website: http://www.giornaledellamusica.it/rol/scheda.php?id=1744&t=S&l=1
I always found Anderson annoyingly smug. It's good to know she's added bitterness to her emotional pallette.
Please tell me this is satire.
Oh god, White Rock, what an awful album. I think the only Wakeman that's still in my rotation is Criminal Record.
I'm a Laurie Anderson fan, and have always enjoyed her concerts, but NASA would've been better publicizing putting everyman Homer Simpson in orbit that commissioning an art scene performance artist.
NASA could also sponsor the upcoming Pink Floyd reunion at Live 8.
They could also do some REAL good and convince Kate Bush to come out of retirement.
I can't stand Laurie Anderson; seems to me all she does is take thirty second's worth of story and add enough strumming guitar music to drag it out for an hour. Here's a transcript from the last concert of hers I had to attend:
Once upon a time (strum, strum, strum, strum, strum)
There was (strum, strum, strum, strum, strum)
a little girl (strum, strum, strum, strum, strum)
and her name (strum, strum, strum, strum, strum)
was (strum, strum, strum, strum, strum)
Cinderella (strum, strum, strum, strum, strum).
And why the hell is NASA hiring official musicians when they're short on cash?
This thread inspired me to put Strange Angels on the CD player. Coolsville. Where's my copy of Big Science?
Anderson does perform actual songs as well as the lengthier performance pieces. But I'll stop there, lest I become the guy from the Onion story last year that insists that the only reason you're not into Zappa is because you haven't heard the right album yet.
I don't know, Nick; she seems like a stupid to me.
Ya wanna commision some space art? Four words:
Zero-Gravity Pole-Dancing.
Here's hoping Hugh Hefner lives long enough to have his own swank spaceplane.
They could also do some REAL good and convince Kate Bush to come out of retirement.
Here, here! I second that!
I have to find that Onion article about said Frank Zappa fan. I don't think I know a Zappa fan (myself included) who isn't like that.
Best. Title. Ever.
They could also do some REAL good and convince Kate Bush to come out of retirement.
They told us
All they wanted
Was a sound that could get us funds
From a distance.
gah! That John Derbyshire article does the kind of statistics manipulation that always pisses me off:
>One astronaut death per eight flights!
is what he says, calling out 14 deaths in 113 flights...but that's deceptive, the proper way to regard it would be 2 incidents in 113 flights, or 14 deaths out 700 some odd flights (I don't know the exact count of people who've been on the shuttle)...which goes from a 12.5% or so failure rate to one less than 2%...
I wouldn't mind hearing a Lou Reed album inspired by space flight...
Take a walk on the dark side?
The last great American heavy lift vehicle?
The trouble with bureaucrats?
Street Hubble?
Columbia now nine times the speed of sound.
Roger that, dan, I?ve got a solid tacan
Locked on, uh, tacan twenty-three.
The, uh, tracking data, map data and pre-planned
Trajectory are all one line on the block
Roger your block decoded
(ENTER GIANT KATE BUSH):
Hello, earth.
Hello, earth.
With just one hand held up high
I can blot you out,
Out of sight.
Peek-a-boo,
Peek-a-boo, little earth.
With just my heart and my mind
I can be driving,
Driving home,
And you asleep
On the seat.
I get out of my car,
Step into the night
And look up at the sky.
And there's something bright,
Travelling fast.
Just look at it go!
Look at it go!
......Zero-Gravity Pole-Dancing - Jeff
I think that Cousin Spider got there first.
Kevin
Anderson did some great stuff in the early-mid 80s, but I stopped listening to her out of principle when I heard she was dating the world's smuggest asshole.
Did Lou and Laurie have a child? The idea of those two procreating chills the blood...