Pigskin Glory

With the NFL's regular season kickoff just two days away, I must return to the theme that has haunted me for nearly two decades now: Why hasn't there ever been a 1985-86 Chicago Bears movie? It practically casts itself:

Ving Rhames as Mike Singletary
Brendan Fraser as Jim McMahon
Tom "Tiny" Lister as Richard Dent
Orlando Jones as Sweetness
Anthony Anderson as The Fridge
Willie Gault as Himself
The Rock as Keith van Horne
Wilford Brimley as Buddy Ryan
James Gandolfini as Mike Ditka

"Super Bowl Shuffle" performed by Outkast

This movie will do more than the Reagan funeral to get the long-stalled eighties nostalgia boom off the ground. What is Hollywood waiting for?