Because Outlawing Gay Marriage Makes Me Wanna Screw!

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A novel twist today in the increasingly desperate National Review/Republican crusade to protect hetero marriage from the homo hordes, care of Kansas Senator Sam Brownback:

The experience of Europe also shows that the decline of the institution of marriage goes hand in hand with a decline in married fertility, and a corresponding decline in population. Because of the birth dearth in Europe, many countries find themselves faced with the prospect of aging (soon to be shrinking) populations and an impending collapse of their social-welfare systems because of a declining ratio of workers to retirees. Two proposed means of keeping the social and economic systems of these countries afloat ? enormous tax hikes and importing vastly increased numbers of laborers ? are widely viewed as infeasible. Whatever might be said in favor of mandating homosexual marriage, it certainly cannot be argued that it would increase the married fertility rate.

Good point! It also "certainly can't be argued" that legalizing gay marriage would cure breast cancer, or solve the crisis in Sudan ? which are about as relevant to the argument as married fertility rates (unless Brownback really believes that FMA would serve as a final barrier preventing otherwise humping heteros from crossing over to the Dark Side).

If propping up birth rates is really Brownback's bag, then I'd suggest redirecting his wrath toward prosperity, which is arguably the single biggest force for reduced birth rates worldwide. Unless he could somehow achieve the Religious Right's trifecta, and make almost all abortion illegal, clamp down on foreign contraceptives, and twiddle the tax code to reward procreators. After all, it worked so well for Ceausescu.