Free Salondotcom! Twitter Shuts Down Hilarious Salon Parody Account

Twitter logoDavid Ferreira / Wikimedia CommonsAt approximately 5:50 P.M. EST, it became known that Twitter had shut down @Salondotcom, a hilarious parody of Salon run by The Daily Caller's opinion editor, Jordan Bloom, and his roommate, Rob Mariani. @Salondotcom constantly tweeted fake headlines that perfectly aped Salon's everyone-is-racist-and-Republicans-are-worse-than-Hitler shtick. Here were a few of the best, courtesy of Mediaite:

Nanoaggressions: Science reveals structural oppression too small for human eyes

— Salon.com (@Salondotcom) June 24, 2014

Should GMOs come with trigger warnings?

— Salon.com (@Salondotcom) June 25, 2014

Ten signs your cat might be racist

— Salon.com (@Salondotcom) June 25, 2014

Contrast with some actual Salon stories currently inhabiting the news website's "Most Read" headlines section:

How Melissa McCarthy sold out overweight women

From wet T-shirts to oral sex contests: A brief history of sexploitative party games

I was poor, but a GOP die-hard: I hated government—even as it was the only thing trying to save me. Here's how, one day, I finally saw the light

The account routinely fooled Twitter users on both the right and left who would click the headlines hoping to be delivered to Salon articles that confirmed their own biases.

It's not clear exactly why Twitter shut down @Salondotcom, although the social media service has been known to suspend parody accounts. Still, it's a shame.

The Twitterverse is currently standing in solidarity with @Salondotcom by using #FreeSalondotcom instead. Supporters are even generating some relevant parody headlines of their own:

Zach Hanover @zhanoverWhy the death penalty should be reserved for cultural appropriators and twitter parody accounts

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  • Irish||

    No one tell them about Vauxnews!

    Vox @vauxnews · 28m
    Zack Beauchamp read a few webpages in an Internet café this morning. Here's a half-assed piece about the Middle East. http://tinyurl.com/voxsplaining
    Vox @vauxnews · Jul 12
    We counted up every preposition that Fox News used last year. The results were as harrowing as you’d expect. http://tinyurl.com/voxsplaining
  • Faceless Commenter||

    If I didn't already have a Twitter account, I'd get one for that alone.

  • GILMORE||

  • ron228||

    This is amazing. Start working at home with Google. It’s a great work at home opportunity. Just work for few hours. I earn up to $100 a day. I can’t believe how easy it was once I tried it out www.Fox81.com

  • flye||

    I was an instant fan after this tweet:

    "Why Emojis are the New Blackface"

  • Sidd Finch v2.01||

    "I was poor, but a GOP die-hard: I hated government—even as it was the only thing trying to save me. Here's how, one day, I finally saw the light"

    This guy has 6 articles for Salon. Three are about Fox News. One is about some pervert. Here's his first.

    Why I fled libertarianism — and became a liberal
    I was a Ron Paul delegate back in 2008 -- now I'm a Democrat. Here's my personal tale of disgust and self-discovery

  • Matrix||

    Some people give up and just go ahead and drink the Kool-Aid as they feel that it will all inevitably end that way.

    Truly, I'm not sure most people have the stomach for liberty.

  • WDATPDIM!?||

    I'm sure most people do not.

  • Lord Peter Wimsey||

    Are you kidding? Most people despise liberty. Sure, they mouth the usual platitudes about freedom, but that's just their way of saying "Let me do what I want to do when I want to do it (and make someone else pay for it.)"

    Everyone else's freedom needs to be curtailed. You know, for the children and for minorities.

    Fuck the mob. And fuck Salon, a magazine that manages to be the worst even in a world that contains Rolling Stone. That's quite a feat.

  • Chumby||

    My thought is many folks leave the cave, see the real flora and fauna, and go back inside preferring the images projected on the wall.

  • pmains||

    Their saving grace is a complete lack of organizational ability, which is why they are always trying to take over the Republican Party, rather than create a party of their own.

    Hear, hear. It's about time somebody founded the Libertarian Party.

  • Almanian!||

    DRIN....wait....

    Yeah, go ahead - DRINK!

  • ||

    Analysis from a guy in a magazine that published an article entitled "Why you’re wrong about communism: 7 huge misconceptions about it (and capitalism)".

    Uh huh.

  • LynchPin1477||

    Aw man, I found that article.

    My favorite is how they try to pretend that tens of millions of dead bodies are no big deal because those people didn't die actively opposing communism, they died supporting it!

    Plus this:
    Famine is not a uniquely “left-wing” problem.

    But it doesn't seem to be a free market problem...

  • Brian||

    You know you're dealing with a high quality publication when there's a communism apologist on the writing staff.

    If libertarians are mean for trying to take the social safety net off of the nordic model of democratic socialism, then WTF is the point of communist advocacy? Destroying western civilization?

  • Trouser-Pod||

    And with such poor critical thinking skills and his want-everything-for-nothing attitude, they can have him.

    Good riddance, bad rubbish.

  • Ayatollah Savaranola||

    I don't know, from his picture it looks like he might be pranking Salon as well.

  • ||

    So he became a GOP die-hard then a statist then a libertarian then a liberal?

  • John C. Randolph||

    A whole lot of people supported Ron Paul in 2008. A surprisingly small number of them threw in the towel on liberty and decided to become leftards.

    -jcr

  • Moonshiner||

    This guy's pandering is so over the top, I can't help but think he's trolling Salon. It's like some super-subversive satire.

  • LynchPin1477||

    Oral sex contests? Apparently I totally wasted my college education.

  • Kevin47||

    Or you didn't go to a state school.

  • LynchPin1477||

    I did, and a big one at that. But I, being the idiot that I am, got a degree in the sciences.

  • ||

    Me too, but I hung around with the arty crowd. Looking back, I would do things differently now.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    I think I'll try my hand at headlines - two are real and one are fake.

    1) Anatomy of the War on Women: How the Koch Brothers Are Funding the Anti-Choice Agenda

    2) Will a conservative icon's ethics problems make him more sympathetic to the less fortunate?

    3) Republicans’ gagging hypocrisy

  • Brandon||

    Which one's fake?

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Come on, have a guess - you'd do it for Derpy.

  • Brandon||

    3?

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Anyone else want to guess?

  • LynchPin1477||

    I'll go with 2.

  • Sidd Finch v2.01||

    two too

  • Faceless Commenter||

    #2

  • GILMORE||

    Ill guess #1

    Since i think even the progs have failed to identify the WoW/Koch-nexus....... YET

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Lynch and Finch win - it was 2.

  • GILMORE||

    Well buttfuck me with a chainsaw.

    I mean, that first one? Mixed metaphor? "Anatomy of a War...??" and the Kochs are supposed to be Making the Global Warming, not repressing the Femalz...?

    Howzat werk?

    hmm

    "While the religious right had, over the years, used its influence to restrict access to abortion and contraception and push for feticide and personhood laws..."

    feticide? Is that greek...cheese?

    ".... nothing quite like the anti-choice legislative frenzy seen this past summer had taken place before the Koch brothers entered the war, bringing reinforcements from their legion of wealthy associates...."

    huh?

    She keeps alluding to the Kochs... but never once names whut they DONE?

    "here is little doubt that the rash of anti-choice measures that flooded the legislative dockets in state capitols in 2013 was a coordinated effort by anti-choice groups and major right-wing donors lurking anonymously behind the facades of the non-profit “social welfare” organizations unleashed to tear up the political landscape, thanks to the high court’s decision in Citizens United."

  • GILMORE||

    Thats the money-shot, BTW = that because Citizen's United enabled companies to support non-profit political orgs... and A FIRESTORM OF ANTIDEMOCRACY FOLLOWED!!!

    There's a chart

    What's remarkable is that most of the money they claim is causing this 'Firestorm of anti-choice legislation'... .was spent 3 years ago.

    Derp indeed

  • blcartwright||

    does she intend for me to believe that left-wing non-profit "social welfare" organizations don't exist?

  • GILMORE||

    THE VOICE OF THE PEOPLES NOT PLUTOCRATS!!

  • LynchPin1477||

    The giveaway was the suggestion that a Republican could be even a little bit sympathetic. No way that gets past the editors at Salon.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    To be fair, I cast my net beyond Salon into the general universe of progressive commentary. I didn't want to limit myself. Sorry for the confusion.

  • Sidd Finch v2.01||

    Something about the use of "less fortunate" was off for me.

  • Sidd Finch v2.01||

    lulz

    David Burge @iowahawkblog · 57m

    RT @Salon Soul on Ice: Joan Walsh on her struggle to imagine being a young woman of color

    SalonDotComLives @AceofSpadesHQ · 1h

    I'M SO FUCKING ANGRY AT THE WORLD I CAN'T SHIT STRAIGHT!!!!: A Salon.com Roundtable

  • Sidd Finch v2.01||

    SalonDotComLives @AceofSpadesHQ · 1h

    Have you ever read a Salon article & thought, "I can do better?" Well you're right. Our low level of quality is democratic and egalistarian.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Luckily Salon itself is an adequate substitute.

  • WDATPDIM!?||

    + a whole lot

  • Brandon||

    SalonDotComLives @AceofSpadesHQ · 37m
    Is it time to reclaim the problematic term "peepeehole"?

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    These are all genuine:

    I’m sorry for coining the phrase “Manic Pixie Dream Girl”

    10 things not to say to a lesbian

    KILL THE VAMPIRE! We get it -- writers are obsessed with the undead. But it's time to drive a stake through the bloodsuckers at last

    Wait, that last one looks quite sensible.

  • LynchPin1477||

    Depends. Are they sexy vampires?

  • ||

    The Worst Muse @WorstMuse · Jul 14

    Kill your darlings, then immediately bring them back as vampire sex ghosts.
  • Brandon||

    Meh. It's not that vampires are played out, it's that shitty vampire fantasies are incredibly irritating. I wouldn't mind another Blade movie.

  • ||

    Vampires are pretty heavily played out. And this is coming from someone who really enjoys True Blood and the Blade franchise (ever watch the very short-lived TV show with Jill Wagner?). It's not just that there are too many Twilights; like zombies, they've just been over-played and need a rest.

    True Blood, Supernatural, Walking Dead; they're all played out and need to end soon. I have thoroughly enjoyed them all but we need something new.

  • wwhorton||

    Shit, zombies. I've written for zombie anthos, and even I'm at the point where if I see one more goddamn thing about zombies I'm gonna puke.

    As for vampires, I'd be ok with "30 Days of Night" style vamps. More Nosferatu, less Anne Rice. To that end, "The Strain" shows some promise, if it doesn't get all stupid.

    And, are we ready for mummies yet? It's their turn, isn't it?

  • robc||

    Someone on here had the best comment about True Blood. Something like "I would totally watch a show based on the opening credits."

    That hit it perfectly. I watched about half the first season and got bored.

  • ||

    I am really liking Walking Dead.

    Though in that show the survival elements and "people are the real monsters' are amped up while the zombies are simply a force like gravity. Plus they play it straight. Zombies are the one thing that is supernatural (and those are explained with a virus or bacteria or whatever)...no damn aliens or gods or angles and werewolves and fuck all added in as the series progresses. I Like that a lot.

    Speaking of dead genres you hear they are making a space opera series on FX based on the Leviathan Wakes books?

  • Acosmist||

    They should make a space western, what an idea that would be

  • ||

    Have you seen The Worst Muse?

    The Worst Muse @WorstMuse · Jul 5

    Go ahead. Make him a vampire. Make them ALL vampires.
    The Worst Muse @WorstMuse · Jul 7

    Corgis are hot these days, right? What about, like, werecorgis? Edgy, urban werecorgis looking for love in all the wrong places.
  • PapayaSF||

    Ha! My contribution:

    Don't worry about word limits! It's the editor's job to cut it to size.

  • ||

    Very nice.

  • PapayaSF||

    Thank you. It was born of bitter experience with someone I was trying to help get published. IIRC a magazine invited him to write a 5,000 word article, and he insisted on sending 20,000+ words, expecting them to either devote the whole issue to his verbose and unstructured piece, or cut it to fit. I told him neither would happen, and I was right.

  • Pro Libertate||

    The Worst Muse is the one who advises SugarFree. O for a muse of phlegm. . . .

  • ||

    Is he talking about Laurell K. Hamilton?

    Holy crap is she bad. I got Kiss of Shadows cuz "sex fantasy sounds good".

    I could not make it past the first chapter.

    Seriously I have huge respect for Anne Rice now...if only because now I know how horribly bad it can really be.

  • Rhywun||

    Am I crazy in remembering that Salon used to be sort-of respectable? Lefty for sure, but not totally unhinged.

  • PapayaSF||

    "Lefty" used to be "sort-of respectable," but the whole ideology has been off the rails for years now.

  • flye||

    I remember that too. The 2000 election sent them, and many others, right over the fucking cliff.

  • Acosmist||

    Not crazy; I think Hitchens used to write for them.

  • -Umbriel-||

    They used to have Stephanie Zacharek writing some decent Movie and TV reviews and commentary too. Now it's mostly reviews by Anthony O'Hehir, who writes like a professor from Berkeley Film School.

  • Sidd Finch v2.01||

    SalonPublicRelations @Popehat · 29m

    [Honestly, it's harder to write fake Korean Central News Agency headlines (@DPRK_News) than fake Salon. North Koreans are less predictable]

  • Jensen||

    For continued parodies of Salon news titles, please follow Salon's twitter.

  • Brian||

    Salon.com:

    Salon has been unprofitable through its entire history. Since 2007, the company has been dependent on ongoing cash injections from board Chairman John Warnock and William Hambrecht, father of former Salon CEO Elizabeth Hambrecht. During the nine months ended December 31, 2012, these cash contributions amounted to $3.4 million, compared to revenue in the same period of $2.7 million.[17]

    These are the same people who whine about the Koch bros.

    Salon is a parody of itself.

  • Rev-Match||

    Salon is a parody of itself.

    Prog ideology is a parody of itself.

  • Skip||

    There is nothing more humorless than a lefty being made fun of.

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

    TI thread?

    Is it buried?

  • ||

    Some assembly required!

  • Sudden||

    The Independents: The IKEA of cable news commentary shows

  • Sudden||

    Politics Nation with Al Sharpton: The Rent-a-Wheel of cable news commentary shows

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Independents assemble? Hello?

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

    INDEPENDENTS ASSEMBLE!

    Okay...

  • Sudden||

    I was gonna save it for TI thread, but since that ain't coming, enjoy learning about Calabasas, CA

  • ||

    I now know way more about a place I don't care about than I could've ever hoped.

  • ||

    I turned on Fox Business and heard someone blathering about "economic patriotism"

    Americans should be paying taxes to America and not somewhere else!

    Fuck, Fox is awful.

  • wwhorton||

    Dobbsy? That sounds like a Lou Dobbs line if ever there was one. If he mentioned the flood of illegals taking all of our valuable manufacturing jobs or anything I'd say it's a lock.

  • ||

    It was a random guest talking with an excessively well manicured (not gay, just Ken-dollish) stand in for Cavuto.

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

    This whole "no thread" thing is stressful.

  • ||

    It's here FdA! go quickly.

  • Brian||

    Real salon.com story:

    No, daughters do not really cause divorce

    Couples with female children tend to separate at higher rates, but it might be because girls can handle it

    Whew. Glad that's straightened out.

  • blcartwright||

    not unless the daughters are diddling their daddies

  • blcartwright||

    girls can handle it? they've been telling me that girls can't handle paying for their own birth control, so what is it?

  • ||

    but it might be because girls can handle it

    Or because the mom gives less of a shit about how her daughter turns out and so tells herself "meh, she can handle it".

  • ||

    Actually the story isn't that bad.

    They are saying Female embryos tend to be tougher then male ones so if the marriage is on the rocks during pregnancy the female embryo is more likely to survive in a stressed out mom then a male embryo.

    They are actually saying the presumed cause of the divorce was the man not wanting a daughter so he leaves is wrong and therefore men are not as sexist as presumed.

    No idea if it is true or not. I like my theory better that some women can be total shits to their kids and to their spouses. Most no fault divorces are initiated by women.

  • ||

    Actually the story isn't that bad. for Salon.

    It's still (Speculative) "Scientific" *Journalism*.

  • ant1sthenes||

    Or, alternatively:

    1) Parents are usually going to love their children more deeply than they do their spouses, which can provoke jealousy in someone getting relegated to #2 in their spouse's life.

    2) A parent is more likely to feel jealous of their spouse's affection for a child of the same sex than of the opposite sex, creepy though that may be.

    3) What with the skewed state of family law in the US, women are more likely to chance a divorce than men. Therefore, female jealousy plays a larger role, and females are more likely to be jealous of daughters.

  • Francisco d'Anconia||

    thread is up

  • Aresen||

    A Salon parody is redundant and unnecessary.

  • ||

    Honestly did not think a parody would be the same thing until there was a parody.

    Who knew Salon hit the low of progressive absurdity until it was made plain for all to see.

    Also who the hell read Salon to find out?

  • stonefree2rant||

    I like it when "girls handle it."

  • Sean O'Gorman||

    I'm conflicted. Twitter parody accounts are stale and played out (hey, I know, I'll make my Twitter handle "not Will Ferrell", use Ron Burgundy as my avatar, and then say I'm a "parody account" and I'll get 800,000 followers overnight!), but man do I hate Salon.

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