Mr. Walton Goes to Washington

Wal-Mart is coming to Washington, which naturally means an extensive session of omphaloskepsis from the chattering classes—and everyone else. While the city's rich people fret about increasing consumerism and Chinese-made goods, the poor and their appointed spokefolks have another worry: Four new stores full of good stuff might prove too tempting as targets for theft:

Brenda Speaks, a Ward 4 ANC commissioner, actually urged blocking construction of the planned store in her ward at Georgia and Missouri avenues NW partly because...young people would get criminal records when they couldn't resist the temptation to steal.

Everyone in city government is eager to put in their two cents (which gets you a week's worth of groceries at Wal-Mart, I hear). But this aside from The Washington Post might be the most instructive part of the article for any business considering opening up shop in the nation's capital:

Planning director [Harriet] Tregoning said she was "very supportive" of asking Wal-Mart to sign an agreement [to do things such as invest in local communities and treat its workers well] but noted that her office's leverage with Wal-Mart is currently "very limited." That's because Wal-Mart is not asking for tax incentives or other public subsidies that would require D.C. Council approval.

Of course, having a D.C. Wal-Mart would make First Lady photo ops more convenient. 

UPDATE: Whoops. Tim Cavanaugh blogged this earlier today. With a far more awesome pic.

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  • Hutti||

    KMW, busted for not reading H&R.

  • Kristen||

    The deja vu is strong with this article!

  • ||

    pass that weed katherine

  • hmm||

    Oh god not Wal-erbating...

  • PantsFan||

    and both will garner over 200 posts

  • We||

    We just can't help ourselves.

  • ||

    On a related note, I read somewhere that a local commissioner is actually fighting Wal-mart on the grounds that neighborhood kids won't be able to resist shoplifting there.

  • ||

    Well I heard that Brenda Speaks is arguing that Walmart shouldn't be allowed in DC because it would entice youth to steal from it.

  • Kristen||

    This post isn't as good as the original one from earlier today because it doesn't include a picture of the glory that is Brena Speaks's hair.

  • ||

    She was awesome in Eraserhead.

  • omg||

    I thought she was in the 5th element?

  • ||

    I assume that she saw that picture and quickly scanned the words "crack cocaine" and came to the conclusion that no one had talked about this yet.

  • ||

    Aw, leave poor Katherine alone. She spends all her time feeding and burping the interns to pay attention to the main page. Not to mention she has to get them to go down for their nap before she can get anything done.

  • ||

    You know, you really let us down with this. You had ample room to imply something much more sexual, yet you pussied out. Such sterility does not become you, NutraSweet. You are at home in the slime; never forget that.

  • ||

    It's got to be all bum rape and goat semen with you, doesn't it? Guess we know what level you're on.

    You lower the tone, Episiarch.

  • ||

    I would be perfectly satisfied with some nun rape, dude. I am capable of a middle ground, even though you prefer to imply that I'm not. It's really not fair of you to do that, you know.

  • Or||

    You're both talentless imbeciles. How's that?

  • Pickled Cunt||

    Kettle...could you please call me?

    Love,

    Pot

  • ||

    I don't understand the Wal-Hate from EVERY politician. For a bunch of millionaires tripping over themselves to be seen with 'real' Americans, why do they avoid the place 'real' Americans go more than any other?

    Trade deficits, information technology, 'working family' jobs and experiences galore, demographic diversity, relevant pop culture backdrops, Wal-Mart is where its at for all those things. Ground zero of our modern consumer economy, diamonds and warts together as it were is Wal-Mart today. And our anointed Everymen avoid it like the plague. Joe Biden doesn't even have a scheme to link Delaware Wal-Marts into Amtrak...I'm amazed.

  • ||

    Michelle Obama is right with you. Other liberal lights haven't caught up yet.

  • ||

    Wally World is the epitome of state Chinese communist central planning - except it happens in Bentonville and not the Forbidden City - same benefactors though.

    TR would bust these fuckers up.

    But TR didn't have to deal with a global economy.

  • Hugh Akston||

    The crucial distinction, of course, is that consumers have a choice of whether to shop at Wal-Mart.

  • ||

    Oh look, shriek is a Teddy fan. Please become more of a statist fuck, shriek...oh wait, you can't.

  • hmm||

    So what do you think removing Wally World, which you're oddly conflating with a State, from the US would do to CPI and the number of people considered to be in poverty based on both purchasing power and employment?

    Less employed and more expensive goods? Or do you think another firm will step in and build the infrastructure, supply chain, and presence in the market necessary to facilitate the same prices?

  • ||

    Wal-Mart is a state subsidized creature.

    They send their hourly employees to Medicaid, they use state tax breaks to build new stores, they greatly benefit from interstate highways they didn't pay for, they offshore production to evade US regulations, they evade US corporate taxes with offshore havens, and so on.

    Their cost of doing business is borne by the American taxpayer.

  • hmm||

    Can you name one corp. that isn't subsidized in some manner by the state?

  • Night Elf Mohawk||

    Other than the $6,000,0000,000 they paid in local, state, and federal taxes, you're spot on about how they don't pay for things.

  • kinnath||

    Every man, women, and child is fucking subsidized in America, but not necessarily by choice. So you can't use that as a club to beat libertarians.

  • Brett L||

    So you missed the part in the article where it specifically said that (at least in this case) WalMart wasn't looking for tax-breaks or subsidies?

  • hmm||

    Lets do some "subsidy" comaprin'

    Wal*Mart's tax expense:$6,899,000,000
    GE's tax epense:($4,155,000,000)

    Since you were a GS accountant I'm going to assume you will see where this is going...

  • hmm||

    Aren't you the one who started the same nonsense with oil companies and GE? (the reason I used GE, and the fact I hate the company)

  • hmm||

    Edgar is a motherfucker when it comes to seeing who's on the government dole...

  • ||

    Awesome.....a mention of the ROADS too.

  • Old Mexican||

    Re: shrike,

    Wal-Mart is a state subsidized creature.

    They send their hourly employees to Medicaid[...]


    ... which Walmart pays along with everybody else.

    [...]they use state tax breaks to build new stores,


    ... Oh, come on, you say that only because not taking more of their money is construed by a statist fuck like yourself as a "subsidy", we have to be clear.

    [...]they greatly benefit from interstate highways they didn't pay for[...]


    Aaaaaannndd.... so does everybody else, including the mom and pop's shops.

    [...]they offshore production to evade US regulations


    Yes, but only because the US regulations were meant to entice people to go offshore... really, what else could it be?

    [...]they evade US corporate taxes with offshore havens, and so on.


    That took the cake - care to back up that assertion with some evidence?

  • sevo||

    shrike|2.14.11 @ 3:42PM|#
    "Wal-Mart is a state subsidized creature."

    What's the going rate for cherry-picking, shriek?

  • Fiscal Meth||

    1 Not giving someone something =\= determining whether or where they might go to get it.

    2 keeping some of your money =\= receiving a gift. If these were the same then all the money anyone is allowed to keep would have to be considered a subsidy.

    3 They pay for every mile they drive by paying the gas tax on every gallon

    4 this is not a subsidy nor is it illegal.

    5 refer to 2

    The cost of government is borne by the American taxpayers including Walmart and everyone who is a part of it besides some hourly workers who pay negative taxes.

  • ||

    TR got his stupid Nobel Peace prize (beginning a long tradition of stoops occasionally getting that prize) by throwing China and Korea under a certain Imperialist Japanese bus.

    Blowback's a bitch.

  • Douglas Fletcher||

    What's it like to be a little fascist creep?

  • shrike||

    I'd rather be a little fascist creep than a fucking Christ-fag capitalist pig, Douglas.

  • sevo||

    shrike|2.14.11 @ 4:38PM|#
    "I'd rather be a little fascist creep than a fucking Christ-fag capitalist pig, Douglas."

    Make it "atheist-fag" and you've embraced them both.

  • Douglas Fletcher||

    Tell me your real name and I'll believe, wussy boy.

  • Douglas Fletcher||

    Tell me your real name and I'll believe, wussy boy.

  • sarcasmic||

    Oh the horror!
    Low priced goods that allow people to buy more!
    Jobs that previously didn't exist!
    We must put a stop to this!
    We can't, I mean simply cannot allow Wal*Mart to come in and give people jobs and access to cheap stuff!
    The horror!

  • ||

    be even cheaper w slave labor. welcome aboard comrade

  • sarcasmic||

    You're so right!
    It's much better to live hand to mouth in a stinking rice paddy than to go to the city and work in a factory.
    I know I would prefer grinding poverty to the higher standard of living provided by the companies that produce these goods, but apparently millions of Chinese don't agree with me.
    No, they are voluntarily leaving the country to go to cities for a promise of a better life.

    Fools!

  • sevo||

    WalScrooge|2.14.11 @ 3:36PM|#
    "be even cheaper w slave labor. welcome aboard comrade"

    Those damn Chinese, trying to act like white people and not starve to death!
    Walscrooge'll put those uppity Chinese in their place!

  • ||

    But, they're NOT tempted to steal from the boutique stores in Foggy Bottom.

  • Kristen||

    Where are these boutiques you speak of in Foggy Bottom?

  • ||

    That reminds me of the episode of The Shield where somebody stole a couple of antique chairs and, with the fencers obviously having no idea of their value, the cops eventually find them under the asses of two old guys playing chess outside.

  • ||

    For the record, the cops found the antique chairs--not the fencers--under the asses of the old guys.

  • ||

    I loved that show and still watch reruns online. While criminals and unquestionably evil, Vic and his boys really gave some of the bad guys what they had coming. The end of the series was perfect.

  • Douglas Fletcher||

    That's because in DC the counterintuitive is real.

  • The Truth||

    Wal-Mart is just the retail front of the People's Republic of China--and fools in this country continue to shop there anyway, widening our already massive trade deficit, and undermining our position in the world while China gets richer and richer.

    BTW, I noticed that as I've been gone certain people have been spoofing me--I guess I really struck a nerve. Remember: imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

    I love how I loom so large in the minds of you losers!

  • ||

    A spoof dropping in to complain about being spoofed. Masterful.

  • hmm||

    indeed

  • ||

    Maybe. Or just possibly extra crispy fried stupid.

  • sarcasmic||

    I have a massive trade deficit with the grocery store. I buy stuff from them all the time and they never buy anything from me. Same with the gas station, hardware store, they never buy anything from me.
    And look what happens as a result.
    I have food in the fridge, gas in the tank, tools in the basement, and they have my money.

    It's horrible!

  • The Truth||

    Your local grocery store isn't an authoritarian state using your money to build a world-class navy to project power around the globe, among other things, dipshit.

  • sarcasmic||

    When I buy something that was made in China I am purchasing something that was made by a company that employs people who work there of their own free will.
    I am not purchasing something from the Chinese government.

    If someone in China purchases a Ford car are they buying it from Ford or from the United States military?

    Dipshit.

  • The Truth||

    Goddamn are you ignorant!

    The Chinese government requires that companies that set up factories there have to form a joint-venture with one of their state-owned corporations. You ARE buying from the Chinese government (and letting them steal western technology).

  • Dick Fitzwell||

    If you don't quit spoofing, we're never going to be able to tell which is which.

  • sarcasmic||

    Holy cow you need to lay off the conspiracy theory websites.

  • The Truth||

    Everything I said is accurate. They're forced to pair with Chiense "joint ventures" in their factories, that are state-owned companies.

    When you buy your iPod, you're not only buying from Apple, but also the Chinese govt. You're funding your own country's demise so you can listen to Lady Gaga.

    They can't fucking believe what they get away with!

  • sarcasmic||

    So when I buy cheap Chinese crap a portion of that is going to the Chinese government?
    I suppose they could do what they do in this country and simply tax the company instead of being part owner. Well, unless we're talking about GM.

    Either way I'm not worried about China.

    This country's government will go bankrupt on it's own long before China becomes a potential threat.

  • The Truth||

    Yes, not only does a portion of your money go to the CCP, but the company building things there has to share all their technology.

    Just watch what happens after GE sets up those jet turbine factories. Three years later, you'll see Chinese Air Force jets using copy-cat GE engines.

    Engines are actually one of China's weak points, and the GE deal is just a rouse to correct that through theft. And our idiot President cheered the deal on as "free trade".

  • hmm||

    Judging from what the experts say about the last "stealth" plane images and the visible rivets so is aerospace engineering.

  • sevo||

    The Truth|2.14.11 @ 4:04PM|#
    "Yes, not only does a portion of your money go to the CCP, but the company building things there has to share all their technology."

    "has to"?
    Do they feed you any solids?

  • Ska||

    No, I'm funding my own country's demise to listen to the Kinks, Gang of Four, and the Stooges. I also own shares in Wal-mart; at least I can tell my neighborhood compliance officer that I supported our new benevolent overlords.

  • ||

    gang of four is back on tour! i'm going on wednesday!

  • sevo||

    The Truth|2.14.11 @ 3:53PM|#
    "Everything I said is accurate...."

    But you left out the people on the grassy knoll.

  • sevo||

    The Truth|2.14.11 @ 3:53PM|#
    "They can't fucking believe what they get away with!"

    Not only that, but they've got this ignorant asshole foaming at the mouth!
    Clever, those Chinese!

  • ||

    > using your money to build a world-class navy to project power around the globe

    So, if you object to such activities, should I assume then that you're in favor of drastic cuts in the US military budget?

    -jcr

  • ||

    So is this the actual guy or the spoof?

  • Spiny Norman||

    I'm not sure it really matters.

  • ||

    I'm pretty sure it's a spoof. If the "real" Truth shows up, it's usually around 11am EST in the Morning Links and it rarely stays around for more than 2 additional articles. This suggests the Anonotroll (of which Truth is a facet) is a West Coaster that trolls before going to work with only sporadic posting after it gets there.

  • hmm||

    You scare me...

  • ||

    I WILL EAT AND DIGEST YOU WITH MY SYSTEM OF MIGHTY ORGANS!

  • wingnutx||

    Your pancreas isn't so mighty.

  • ||

    You scare me

    All this time and you just now are afraid? An underachieving pancreas does terrible, horrible things to people.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    BTW, I noticed that as I've been gone certain people have been spoofing me--I guess I really struck a nerve. Remember: imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

    Mockery ≠ Imitation.

  • The Troof||

    I'm the real Truth!

  • The Truth||

    I guess I really struck a nerve

    HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA! catch my breath.
    HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!

    I never bothered to read your post in the first place to have any NERVES STRUCK! Fuckin' mulie.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    Planning director [Harriet] Tregoning said she was "very supportive" of asking Wal-Mart to sign an agreement [to do things such as invest in local communities and treat its workers well] but noted that her office's leverage with Wal-Mart is currently "very limited." That's because Wal-Mart is not asking for tax incentives or other public subsidies that would require D.C. Council approval.

    Wal-Mart isn't going to ask for money with a thousand tiny strings attached to it? It won't be offering kickbacks community reinvestment to chosen friends and relatives of the D.C. City Council? What in the world is America coming to?

  • ||

  • Warty||

    That's SM, right?

  • ||

    Certainly throws the phrase "I'm going to fuck you right in the arse!" into a new light, doesn't it?

  • Fiscal Meth||

    The only way to really make sure people don't become felons is to lock everybody up. So let's do that I guess.

  • Hugh Akston||

    They're working on it. only 99% of the populace to go.

  • Pip||

    They're working on it. only 99 98% of the populace to go.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2008/02.....rison.html

  • ||

    fools in this country continue to shop there anyway, widening our already massive trade deficit, and undermining our position in the world while China gets richer and richer.

    Eventually, the Chinese will become rich enough to crack the magical $15.00/day per capita income barrier.

    And then where will we be?

  • The Truth||

    You won't feel so smug in 30 years when they're building naval bases in Mexico and patrolling of the coast of California with aircraft carriers, and forcing us to "reform" along their lines.

  • ||

    You are hilarious. More, please.

  • ||

    Every time you use chopsticks instead of a fork, China wins.

  • ||

    HONG KONG PHOOEY

  • ||

    Don't laugh. MSG stands for Mind-Sapping Gunk.

  • ||

    No, it stands for flavor.

  • ||

    Slavor.

  • Ska||

    What does Sabado Gigante mean? Great tits?

  • ||

    I like the way you think, ProL. I really do.

  • ||

    Don't thank me; thank the Truth. He's truly inspirational.

  • Hugh Akston||

    Yeah, but the great thing about Chinese aircraft carriers is that they break almost as soon as you take them out of the box.

  • Zeb||

    Aren't you paying any attention at all? The Mexicans are already all Chinese agents. What, you think they really come here to take our jobs?

  • ||

    Remember how a Japanese guy mysteriously became the head of state in Peru? Same thing. Only this time with the new Asian Peril®.

  • ||

    Salma Hayek is Asian?!? THAT IS FUCKING HAWT!

  • ||

    According to the Urkobold, she's an Austrian economist. I swear that's the only reason the Ur Troll is a libertarian.

  • sevo||

    The Truth|2.14.11 @ 3:50PM|#
    "You won't feel so smug in 30 years when they're building naval bases in Mexico and patrolling of the coast of California with aircraft carriers, and forcing us to "reform" along their lines."

    Lemme guess: Captain Marvel Comix, Aug 1968.
    Right?

  • omg||

    My mom goes to planning meetings for her (very small) city. She related a story to me where she and a few others tried to fight against a Home Depot being built, because she thought it was too close to another Home Depot. I asked her why that was the problem of the planning commission and not the problem, of, say, Home Depot. She didn't have an answer...

  • ||

    Bitch-slap your mom for me the next time you see her.

    -jcr

  • Ska||

    What, no purple mushroom?

  • Johnny Longtorso||

    Where is TRIATHLON guy?

  • China||

    Stupid Americans! We take all you money! Rahahahahaha!!!!!

    Everyting you buy increases our economic and miritary power! Soon you will kneel before us as we will read the world into rampant capitarism!

  • Warty||

    What you call American with PhD in Physics and Math? Stupid American! RARARARARARARAR

  • ||

    Oh no! My Shitty Beef! My Shitty Chicken!

  • Obama||

    That's right China, all the tea..

  • ||

    you'll see Chinese Air Force jets using copy-cat GE engines.

    Just as long as i get my cut of the royalty payments.

  • ||

    GE stock. My hedge on socialism.

  • hmm||

    As long as there's a US government GE will make money.

  • ||

    I can't lose.

  • shrike||

    Goddammit, I am SUCH a pussy.

  • The Truth||

    It's a troll thing.

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