Jackboots Crush Bacon Dogs

Here at reason, we've been on the bacon dog beat for a while now, chronicling the brave men and women who grill bacon dogs on L.A.'s street corners, in defiance of rules and regulations which class bacon as a "hazardous food." The story has everything: class warfare, racism, protection rackets, relish, and mustard.

This latest development is so not kosher—a veritable bacon dog Kristallnacht:

At Hollywood and Highland last Friday night, police cracked down on the little ladies with the cars selling those street favorites. All the food and all their equipment were confiscated and trashed.

An LAist photographer was there, and he caught a series of horrifying images, including the one above, which depicts illegal hot dog carts being fed into the gaping maw of the dumpster truck. This is a cruel variation on the proper order of things, which should include grilled bacon dogs being fed into the gaping maws of drunk idiots.

The Ur-text of bacon doggery, starring Drew Carey:

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  • ||

    Wait, without a trial?

    Their stuff was confiscated and destroyed?

    I thought that everyone in LA was packing! How could this stand without at least one person getting shot?

  • kinnath||

    Make's me proud to be an American.

  • Neil||

    It's about time. These people are going to kill someone someday with a bacteria-laden dog.

  • ||

    Makes me proud to not live in L.A. How anybody can choose to live there is beyond me.

  • The Extispicator||

    I guarantee if you gave this as a hypothetical to 100 people on the street, 90% or more would think you were making a slippery-slope argument by grossly exaggerating and making something up that would never happen in America.

  • Episiarch||

    Neil? Is that you?

  • ||

    The same could be said about some of the current LEO domestic surviellence techniques.

    Is food so abundant in this country that we can afford to illegalize some of it and throw it in the garbage?

    I'm a firm believer that no one should eat hot dogs, I a bigger believer that I can't tell everyone else what to do.

  • Bingo||

    If even one child is forced to suffer from obesity brought on by a bacon dog then the terrorists have won.

  • Nash||

    "I guarantee if you gave this as a hypothetical to 100 people on the street, 90% or more would think you were making a slippery-slope argument by grossly exaggerating and making something up that would never happen in America."

    Since most people don't think the freedom to eat bacon dogs is all that important and also don't care about the welfare of street vendors who are selling bacon dogs most people find this practice acceptable. Yucky bacon dog vendors make the street yucky anyway.

    Liberals justify this in the name of public health and Conservatives justify this in the name of the Rule of Law.

  • ||

    Bacon is not a health food. The government has a right and in fact an obligation to protect us from things that are not good for us. Anything that helps the cops to keep us a slim and trim is inherently a good thing, I'm all for it. The government is responsible for our food choices because they pay our health care through medicare/caid.

    J

  • ||

    Somebody in L A should be getting a "joker" in the mail...

  • ||

    The story has everything: class warfare, racism, protection rackets, relish, and mustard.

    Sweeeeeeet

  • Dan||

    Juantia, you ignorant slut. The government has no business telling what we can or can't eat. If I want to pump up to the size of the Goodyear blimp, that's my business and no one else's.

  • ||

    The writeup should probably mention that this has absolutely nothing to do with obesity or deliciously hardened arteries, which is what I had assumed; instead the health department feels some old, cheap food carts are inadequate to keep bacon from being contaminated with food-borne pathogens and requires vendors who sell bacon to use newer, $26,000 carts with three-compartment sinks, etc. This is oppressive and probably unnecessary but at least it sounds like it's within the health department's jurisdiction.

  • ||

    Bacon is not a health food. The government has a right and in fact an obligation to protect us from things that are not good for us.

    And yet, inexplicably, the government hasn't shut down Juanita's trolling. Clearly not living up to their obligations.

  • ||

    Bacon is not a health food. The government has a right and in fact an obligation to protect us from things that are not good for us.

    And yet, inexplicably, the government hasn't shut down Juanita's trolling. Clearly not living up to their obligations.

    Apparently, "i" in brackets doesn't close tags nearly as well as "/i" in brackets. Preview, dammit!

  • Neil||

    You're a little late to the party Joel H.

  • Orange Line Special||

    Reason doesn't really care about this issue, they're just trying to a) smear those who support our laws as racists, and b) try to appear "cool" by (yet again) supporting illegal activity.

    It also seems to be yet another violation of at least the spirit of libruhtarian* "principles". If a hotdog made someone sick it would be very difficult to go track down the culprit. Libruhtarian "principles" would seem to require the give and take of those who are sold something being able to hold the seller responsible.

    This is similar to the libruhtarian support for potentially dangerous things whose dangers won't be known for decades.

    Do some of Reason's sponsors make hot dog carts or something?

    * "libruhtarian" is their new preferred term for themselves.

  • ||

    What would happen if you paid somebody to paint a mural on the side of your hot dog cart in L A? Would the city council send somebody out to hunt you down and paint over it?



    You can't let these itinerant hot dog salesmen run roughshod over brick-and-mortar fast food franchises; that would be un-American.

  • ||

    Katherine loses the thread right in the post with Godwin- invoking Kristallnacht reference.

    Between this and the Michael Phelps 12,000 calorie strawman she posted the other day her batting average is rapidly approaching the mendoza line.

  • Episiarch||

    I'm frankly astonished by the level of LoneDipshit's energy. He has his website, goes out and asks people dumb questions, monitors reason for any story related to his obsession, etc. Where does he find the time?

  • Nigel Watt||

    Episiarch: He has to either be a bureaucrat or a welfare queen.

  • agorabum||

    Death Dogs (as they are known) are delicious and a vital part of the glory of LA.
    The trick is picking a dog that has the bacon (which is wrapped 'round the dog in a spiral) well done.
    The wise consumer will always be safe from pathogens (plus the Dogs sit on a heated tray, the same that cooks them, just pushed to the side once done).
    Street food needs more boosters in America and less attacks by foolish bureacracy.

  • Bingo||

    P Brooks:

    We need to ban new bacon dog carts in poor areas.

  • Proud Vet||

    Lonewacko,

    Many of theose IllegalHotdogs are scavenged from outside bordertown nightclubs.
    When I was in San Diego serving in the Marines in San Diego me and some buddies went down and caught a show called "Bride of the Bratwurst". Needless to say I never ate a street hotdog again.

  • ||

    """Anything that helps the cops to keep us a slim and trim is inherently a good thing, I'm all for it. """

    Cocaine? Crystal Meth? Those will help slim and trim.

  • ||

    Perhaps the City of Angels could institute a program to subsidize guacamole vendors, in order to combat the evil HotDogAlienMenace.

  • Naga Sadow||

    Sweet Jesus! Neil, Juanita, AND LoneWacko? On the same thread, no less? Bacon dogs are a more divisive issue than I thought.

  • ||

    Guacamole is green, so it's gotta be good for you.

    Right?

  • Naga Sadow||

    Are bacon dog vendors in league with terrorists or something similiar to warrant this kind of suppresion?

  • Bingo||

    Too late P Brooks, they already banned Taco Stands from parking for more than an hour in one location. They are now forced to deal with IllegalHotdogs.

    How the hell does so much nannyism reside in one metropolitan area?

  • ||

    Could it be that they just want to keep L.A. from looking like Tijuana?

  • ||

    """"Libruhtarian "principles" would seem to require the give and take of those who are sold something being able to hold the seller responsible."""

    Tisk, tisk. It really shows you have NO understand of the issue. If someone was hurt as a result of the hotdog, then they have a right to make a claim to be judged in front of a netrual party. That's not the problem here. How many lawsuits have happened as a result of a bacon dog harming someone?

    Do you have a problem with people eating what they want? Or better yet, you really think the government should decide our diet and enforce it by law?

  • ||

    First the came for the bacon dogs... then they came for the tamale lady!

  • The Extispicator||

    I won't feel safe until they have surveillance cameras in every public restroom. Then, when someone doesn't wash for 30 seconds, the SWAT team breaks down your doors at 3:00 a.m.

    It's the government's job to keep us all safe, after all.

  • Orange Line Special||

    TrickyVic: your libruhtarian "principles" would seem to require some degree of accountability. Otherwise, there'd be no need for courts, and people could dump ToxicWaste and the like at will. Therefore, in your Randhead fantasy, there'd have to be an infrastructure of laws that would have to be enforced. Unless, of course, this site is advocating pure anarchy, and they aren't.

    I'm sure very many people have gotten sick, and they have little recourse. Yet, libruhtarian "principles" would seem to require there being some recourse against a malefactor.

    Once again: is one of Reason's contributors a manufacturer of hotdog carts or something?

    P.S. Someone Weigel was mocking last week has reply to this

  • Orange Line Special||

    P.S. Someone Weigel was mocking last week has the report Weigel isn't capable of.

  • Naga Sadow||

    LoneWacko!!!!!!!!!

    *shakes fist in air*

  • Naga Sadow||

    Atabrat,

    If the tamale girl isn't safe then . . . (gasp) even lobster girls isn't safe!!!

  • ||

    Maybe the cops don't like bacon dogs because they don't like seeing one of their own cooked to a crisp.

    Ba-da-boom.

    or

    You can have my bacon dog when you pry it from my dead, rather corpulent, dead fingers.

  • Invisible Finger||

    Needless to say I never ate a street hotdog again.

    And without requiring the police!

  • John McCain||

    And one day a Los Angeles county health inspector walked up to me, removed his shoe, and with it he drew a picture of a bacon wrapped hotdog in the sand.For a minute there were just two hungry men there. I'll never forget that.

  • ||

    a veritable bacon dog Kristallnachtwurst

    Fixed.

  • ||

    Reminds me of what my first cousin whispered to me at a recent family reunion. He whispered because he didn't want his Little Woman to hear.
    Seems he can't resist going for lunch to a hole-in-the-wall place down in Nashville called, "Chicago Dog."
    He says that when she suspects something--smells it on his breath, I guess--he says, "Hey, I'm on my Lipitor."

  • ||

    MY company sells/repairs hot dog carts, and I am a Reason subscriber...

    Sure gettin' my $20 worth, keep it up!

  • ||

    """"TrickyVic: your libruhtarian "principles" would seem to require some degree of accountability. Otherwise, there'd be no need for courts, and people could dump ToxicWaste and the like at will. Therefore, in your Randhead fantasy, there'd have to be an infrastructure of laws that would have to be enforced. Unless, of course, this site is advocating pure anarchy, and they aren't."""

    You're funny, and an idiot. You read a couple of posts and you think you really know something about someone which sums up your critical thinking skills. You hear a couple of things and you think you know it all.

    """I'm sure very many people have gotten sick, and they have little recourse. Yet, libruhtarian "principles" would seem to require there being some recourse against a malefactor."""

    Show the proof that anyone has gotten sick from the bacon dogs.

    Why don't you go back to the AOL boards where appeal to personal attack might mean something.

  • ||

    When you eat a bacon dog, you eat with bin Laden. Of course he's eating the Morningstar Farms soy bacon dog, but the point remains.

  • Charlton Batin\'||

    They can take my bacon from my cold, dead hands.

  • Dan||

    Bacon is somehow dangerous? It's CURED MEAT, by it's nature, it's safer than the cr@p that goes into most hotdogs. It's a salty, relatively fatty cut.

  • SIV||

    Bacon is somehow dangerous?

    Well it doesn't pay property taxes, purchase a business license, or collect sales taxes. It doesn't play by the rules with the county health department bureaucracy either.

    Bacon just wants to be free.

  • TallDave||

    This is a cruel variation on the proper order of things, which should include grilled bacon dogs being fed into the gaping maws of drunk idiots.M

    Hey! I resent that! I'm not drunk yet.

  • ||

    LA is like a cable repair man's ass crack. Sure it gets some sunshine, but I definitely wouldn't want to live there.

  • ||

    My lovely Juanita,

    I want you to want me.
    I need you to need me.
    Id love you to love me.
    Im beggin you to beg me.
    Ill shine up the old brown shoes, put on a brand-new shirt.
    Ill get home early from work if you say that you love me.

    Forever a prisoner of love,
    J sub D

  • ||

    Dan, prolefeed,

    Leave Juanita, the internet goddess who all to rarely graces us with her wisdom, alone!

    I mean it.

  • ||

    In a slightly more serious vein, I've eaten food from street vendors in not a few third world locales. I've gotten ill from these rpadside gasronomical expeditions exactly zero time. I did get food poisining from a sit down Denny's like restaurant in Texas once. That was probably my fault for ordering my eggs over easy. The fears of a new Typhoid Mary are overblown to put it mildly.

    L.A., sell them a vendor's license for $100 per annum and leave these industrious purverors of deliciousness the fuck alone.

  • ||

    looks like it's time to ship 30lbs. of weed to the LA city council and Health Dept.

  • ||

    They can take my bacon dog when they pry it out of my cold, dead ....uh, actually, because its so slippery, I guess they can slide it out pretty easily.
    But it sure is hard to give up a long, hot bacon wrapped weiner.

  • ||

    Since the government is paying for Juanita's healthcare, she must be an illegal alien. Those of us who were born on American soil, (and have a brain - i.e. aren't Demunists), take a somewhat dimmer view of the government telling us what we're allowed to eat "for our own good".

  • ||

    Orange Line Special (LoneWacko) wrote:
    Reason doesn't really care about this issue, they're just trying to a) smear those who support our laws as racists, and b) try to appear "cool" by (yet again) supporting illegal activity.

    "Supporting illegal activity" sounds really sinister until you remember that it applies to anyone who thinks a government ban is stupid. And the world is filled with stupid government bans. So what's your point again?

    It also seems to be yet another violation of at least the spirit of libruhtarian* "principles". If a hotdog made someone sick it would be very difficult to go track down the culprit. Libruhtarian "principles" would seem to require the give and take of those who are sold something being able to hold the seller responsible... This is similar to the libruhtarian support for potentially dangerous things whose dangers won't be known for decades.

    What are you talking about? No libertarian, no liberal, no conservative, no reasonable person would ever say that your rights are violated every time you eat food that makes you sick. If you voluntarily decide to eat some food, knowing the risks involved, and the vendor has in no way misrepresented the food or the attendant risks, then you should have no legal recourse should you get sick. It sucks to get sick, but it's not a matter of injustice. Likewise, when the risks of some activity are unknown, but the individual(s) offering the activity have in no way misrepresented the activity or the attendant (unknown) risks, then you should have no legal recourse should you meet with misfortune. This is pretty basic stuff for any society that wants its adults free to experiment with different activities, and offer up different activities to each other.

    "libruhtarian" is their new preferred term for themselves.

    LOL WUT

  • ||

    Matt wrote:
    Katherine loses the thread right in the post with Godwin- invoking Kristallnacht reference.

    Matt, if you read the sentence "This latest development is so not kosher-a veritable bacon dog Kristallnacht" and take it seriously, you need to get out more.

  • ||

    Leave it to the nanny-statists in the coastal cities to turn around and make new laws, criminalizing behavior under the guises of "protecting the consumer", all to go after anyone who deviates from their ideas of "what is good for you". God forbid we have the right to make any choices with which these fascists disagree. Go Drew, and keep exposing the idiots whenever you can.

    For all of you who misguidedly believe I'm just a moron who glorifies law-breakers, nay, and au contraire. I'm a firm believer in law an order and despise those fascists out there (Tom Frieden, Mayor Bloomberg, that Predator-looking guy from L.A. in the video, etc.) who subvert the process to control our lives in every fine detail. Unfortunately, most people have their heads jammed so far up their own rectums, they don't even notice that their personal freedoms are disappearing because it has nothing to do with "American Idol", box scores or the other worthless minutiae in which they normally wallow.

  • ||

    its horrifying that people can still buy deadly bacon at grocery stores. (or can they in california?)

  • ||

    Juanita,
    "Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety" Benjamin Franklin
    BTW, choosing what to put in your body IS an essential liberty.

  • Jeffreak||

    Do those bacon dog carts deliver?

  • B||

    "This latest development is so not kosher-a veritable bacon dog Kristallnacht."

    Why don't you throw in another Nazi reference, because as we all know, shutting down a hot dog vendor is the moral equivalent to a pogrom against the jews.

  • B||

    "Matt, if you read the sentence "This latest development is so not kosher-a veritable bacon dog Kristallnacht" and take it seriously, you need to get out more."

    Hahahahaha, you are so right. Those Kristallnacht jokes are absolutely hilarious. I tell you, those crazy Nazis. What a wacky bunch they were. Sixty three years after the fall of the Third Reich and they are still providing us with pure comedy gold.

  • Sean W. Malone||

    B... I'd really hope you can see a distinction between making a humorous Nazi-related reference like (my personal favorite aspect of this board thus-far) Kristallnachtwurst and say, for example, the PETA ads comparing chicken coops to concentration camps.

    One is serious... the other is just a joke. 2 guesses which is which.

  • ||

    B wrote:
    Hahahahaha, you are so right. Those Kristallnacht jokes are absolutely hilarious. I tell you, those crazy Nazis. What a wacky bunch they were. Sixty three years after the fall of the Third Reich and they are still providing us with pure comedy gold.

    B, quit whining. We've all seen The Producers (some of have even seen "Hitler on Ice"). Also that Fawlty Towers episode.

    Seriously, fuck off.

  • Sean W. Malone||

    It's springtime... for Hitler.

  • B||

    "Seriously, fuck off."


    Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

  • Brian Mora||

    If those ninny-nanny neocoms tried doing THAT to MY hot dog stand, I'd fill their asses with .44 slugs at pointblank range, and FUCK THE POLICE AND A 187!

    Hey Juanita, how about you go move to Cuba, where people DON'T eat good food, because they CAN'T eat good food, eh?

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