Meanwhile, on the Isle of Lesbos...

Nick Gillespie | May 1, 2008

Reader H Clay points us to this BBC story about what might just be the ultimate nuisance lawsuit since The Simpsons' Lionel Hutz took on The Neverending Story:

Campaigners on the Greek island of Lesbos are to go to court in an attempt to stop a gay rights organisation from using the term "lesbian".

The islanders say that if they are successful they may then start to fight the word lesbian internationally.

The issue boils down to who has the right to call themselves Lesbians.

Is it gay women, or the 100,000 people living on Greece's third biggest island - plus another 250,000 expatriates who originate from Lesbos?

The man spearheading the case, publisher Dimitris Lambrou, claims that international dominance of the word in its sexual context violates the human rights of the islanders, and disgraces them around the world.

He says it causes daily problems to the social life of Lesbos's inhabitants....

In court papers, the plaintiffs allege that the Greek government is so embarrassed by the term Lesbian that it has been forced to rename the island after its capital, Mytilini.

An early court date has now been set for judges to decide whether to grant an injunction against the Homosexual and Lesbian Community of Greece and to order it to change its name.

The kicker to the story? Sorry, girls, Sappho was married: "According to Mr Lambrou, new historical research has discovered that Sappho had a family, and committed suicide for the love of a man."

Whole thing here.

Comments

Elemenope|5.1.08 @ 10:47AM|#

The man spearheading the case, publisher Dimitris Lambrou, claims that international dominance of the word in its sexual context violates the human rights of the islanders, and disgraces them around the world.

This is what happens when you fight what you are. They must embrace the dangerous world of chicks touchin' on each others titties, for their own psychological well-being but also for the principle of truth-in-advertising.

Guy Montag|5.1.08 @ 10:48AM|#

Saw this in The Corner yesterday. Almost spewed coffee all over my keyboard!

|5.1.08 @ 10:49AM|#

I'm a lesbian, trapped in a man's body.

Somebody had to say it.

robc|5.1.08 @ 10:50AM|#

The Neverending Story lawsuit wasnt a nuisance suit. Hutz was clearly right, it was a blatant case of fraud.

B|5.1.08 @ 10:52AM|#

If any of the original Sodomites were around, I guess they'd be pretty pissed, too.

Episiarch|5.1.08 @ 10:53AM|#

I bet Odysseus stopped there but just didn't tell Penelope about it.

The Winecommonsewer|5.1.08 @ 10:53AM|#

Yep, it's tough all over. The people in San Francisco will kick your ass for openly referring to the City by the Bay as Frisco

Eric Cartman|5.1.08 @ 11:00AM|#

The Winecommonsewer,

They will do something to your ass, but I dont think they will be kicking it.

TWC From Vegas, er Las Vegas|5.1.08 @ 11:00AM|#

The neverending story is the neverending lawsuits.

|5.1.08 @ 11:12AM|#

heh heh,
I thought I was just being immature when I read the title of this thread and immediately thought of Lesbians.

|5.1.08 @ 11:12AM|#

What happens in Lesbo, stays in Lesbo.

... and how does it "disgraces them around the world"? Everyone loves lesbiens ... or at least the lipstick kind in porn.

Invisible Finger|5.1.08 @ 11:14AM|#

Yep, it's tough all over. The people in San Francisco will kick your ass for openly referring to the City by the Bay as Frisco

I've always called it Crisco Bay.

Brian Sorgatz|5.1.08 @ 11:18AM|#

An early court date has now been set for judges to decide whether to grant an injunction against the Homosexual and Lesbian Community of Greece and to order it to change its name.

Don't they know it's too late to put their finger in that dyke?

|5.1.08 @ 11:18AM|#

Couldn't they both use the name?

There are plenty of other people around who call themselves Russ (even within H&R), but you don't see me seeking injunctions against them.

|5.1.08 @ 11:21AM|#

You've got a bigger problem than that, Russ.

What about the millions of people claiming to be affiliated with you? You know, the Russians?

I smell class action suit, baby!

Elemenope|5.1.08 @ 11:22AM|#

Don't they know it's too late to put their finger in that dyke?

You, sir, are a thread-winner.

There are plenty of other people around who call themselves Russ (even within H&R), but you don't see me seeking injunctions against them.

Yeah, but that must be because you are Canadian or something equally temper-deficient. Join the human race and get rightfully pissed off about things of no consequence, for once!

Rhywun|5.1.08 @ 11:22AM|#

According to Mr Lambrou, new historical research has discovered that Sappho had a family, and committed suicide for the love of a man.

Given that the line about being "forced to rename the island after its capital" is horseshit, I'm not sure I'm buying this twerp's "historian" credentials, either.

Guy Montag|5.1.08 @ 11:28AM|#

Neverending Story soundtrack is some of Kaja Goo Goo's greatest work.

Rhywun|5.1.08 @ 11:30AM|#

I thought Limahl just did the theme song?

|5.1.08 @ 11:30AM|#

< sings >
Turn around
Look at what you SEEEEEEEEEE
In her face
The mirror of your DREEEEEEEEEEAM
< / sings >

Brian Sorgatz|5.1.08 @ 11:31AM|#

You, sir, are a thread-winner.

I thank you-and I thank my own good luck that nobody else had come up with that already.

Ha haa! Caught you all napping!

|5.1.08 @ 11:35AM|#

The Greeks appear to be pursuing a trend of being touchy with names. They're still mad at what they insist on calling the Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedeonia.

Guy Montag|5.1.08 @ 11:45AM|#

Rhywun,

I thought Limahl just did the theme song?
Close enough for me.

|5.1.08 @ 11:49AM|#

Tempest in a teapot. What's in a name? Who decides whether a name is "real"?

Elemenope|5.1.08 @ 11:54AM|#

The Greeks appear to be pursuing a trend of being touchy with names. They're still mad at what they insist on calling the Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedeonia.

To say nothing of Asia Minor and Constantinople.

|5.1.08 @ 11:58AM|#

As a sports enthusiast, I say its about time for this kind of suit. I won't even tell you people what comes up when I Google "Lesbian wrestling."

|5.1.08 @ 12:00PM|#

Add the feta protected designation of origin. Feta can only come from Greece in the EU, even though it's produced all over the Balkans and Denmark.

Rhywun|5.1.08 @ 12:27PM|#

Close enough for me.

I was just talking out of my ass. I have no idea if he/they did any other music for it. I've never even seen the damn thing. I've been to the studio in Germany where it was filmed though...

|5.1.08 @ 12:43PM|#

I don't ordinarily concern myself with thread winner/loser issues, but I am compelled to say this: "finger in the dyke," may be an oldy-but-goody, but the hordes of "Russ" -ians swarming over the horizon carried with them the element of surprise.

Other Matt|5.1.08 @ 1:00PM|#

Don't they know it's too late to put their finger in that dyke?

You, sir, are a thread-winner.

I would have to concur with that assessment.

cgee|5.1.08 @ 1:02PM|#

First Macedonia, now Lesbos.

This is what happens when a former world power becomes a third-world backwater. It tries anything it can to defend its "honor" and bring back a piece of its glorious past. Frankly, I'm surprised that Egypt hasn't attempted something similar by suing the Gypsies.

The European penchant for protecting geographic designations above and beyond the traditional limitations of established trademark law certainly doesn't help -- it just encourages Greece's delusional overreaching here.

|5.1.08 @ 1:20PM|#

"The kicker to the story? Sorry, girls, Sappho was married: 'According to Mr Lambrou, new historical research has discovered that Sappho had a family, and committed suicide for the love of a man.'"

Since when was marriage a guarantee that the wife or husband are straight?

jtuf|5.1.08 @ 1:35PM|#

This is a case for the court of public opinion. Words pick up different connotations in different times and communities. Is "lesbo" an insult to Greek ilanders or a label some women wear with pride? Is Jersey where all the UK citizens go shopping or collection of fisheries with a unique, um, atmosphere?

herbin legend|5.1.08 @ 2:12PM|#

They should call themselves Lesboners.

|5.1.08 @ 2:33PM|#

Since when was marriage a guarantee that the wife or husband are straight?

If a woman who marries a gay man is a "beard", what do we call a man who marries a lesbian?

|5.1.08 @ 2:48PM|#

If a woman who marries a gay man is a "beard", what do we call a man who marries a lesbian?

S.O.L.

Elemenope|5.1.08 @ 2:55PM|#

If a woman who marries a gay man is a "beard", what do we call a man who marries a lesbian?

Depending on the terms of the relationship, either very happy or incredibly sad.

alan|5.1.08 @ 3:57PM|#

Anything hotter than seeing two Mytilinians squeezing each others tits?

|5.1.08 @ 4:05PM|#

"If a woman who marries a gay man is a "beard", what do we call a man who marries a lesbian?"

A menstrual.

|5.1.08 @ 4:25PM|#

If a woman who marries a gay man is a "beard", what do we call a man who marries a lesbian?

A lucky bastard who can bring bi girlfriends home for a threesome?

Exit Stage Right|5.1.08 @ 5:28PM|#

"This is what happens when a former world power becomes a third-world backwater. It tries anything it can to defend its "honor" and bring back a piece of its glorious past. Frankly, I'm surprised that Egypt hasn't attempted something similar by suing the Gypsies."

Makes you wonder what sort of antics the US will be up to in a decade or two.

"If a woman who marries a gay man is a "beard", what do we call a man who marries a lesbian?"

I always though a woman who married a gay man was called a "fag-hag?"

|5.1.08 @ 5:54PM|#

If a woman who marries a gay man is a "beard", what do we call a man who marries a lesbian?

A merkin?

Kevin

|5.1.08 @ 9:50PM|#

Hey, kevrob, I was going to say that.

|5.2.08 @ 1:41PM|#

"O.k., let's take roll ... Thomas Jefferson?"
"Here."
"Benjamin Franklin?"
"Here."
"John Footpenis?"
"It's 'Hancock' now."
"Right."