Miley Cyrus VMA Twerking Results in Ludicrous FCC Complaints

MTV VMAsMTV VMAsApparently there a whole bunch of people who don't have anything better to do than complain to the Federal Communications Commission about Miley Cyrus's dance moves.

The Smoking Gun obtained more than 150 pages of FCC complaints about the pop stars act at MTV's Video Music Awards last month, which The Huffington Post has conveniently posted as a single, 161-page document.

Some of them are fairly absurd. A few choice excerpts from The Smoking Gun's highlight reel:

* Cyrus accused of “licking the butt of a stuff bear.”

“Humped him like a bitch in heat.”

* Cyrus “touched the genitals of an older man while performing music.”

“GOD HELP THIS NATION.”

* Cyrus was “acting like a devil flicking that tongue as deamons do.”

* Cyrus engaged in “implied sexual acts with bears.”

...

“As an educator I have to stand up and say, ‘Enough is enough.’”

* Cyrus appeared “like she just coked up back stage ….really !!!!!”

“Dry humping, which they call twerking apparently.”

“I was subjugated to 4 minutes of Miley Cyrus.”

Subjugated! Practically tortured! 

The joke's on the complainers, though, as the FCC doesn't actually regulate indecency on cable networks like MTV. Thank goodness!

As the agency explains, it stays its hand from the higher end of the channel line-up "because cable and satellite services are subscription-based." As a result "viewers of these services have greater control over the programming content that comes into their homes."

Over the years, of course, various legislative nanniers have argued that the FCC ought to extend its censorious reach to cover pay-cable networks. But what incidents like this suggest is that we ought to seriously consider the opposite approach: taking the FCC off watch for broadcast as well.

For many if not most viewers, there's little meaningful distinction between cable and broadcast networks at this point. And people have just as much control over what comes into their homes, and what they watch, regardless of the source.

So the hands-off logic that applies to cable ought to apply to broadcast as well: Just as there's no good reason to police what MTV can and can't show, becuase people can always choose to watch something else, there's no good reason for federal censors to limit what the broadcast networks can show. 

Read Nick Gillespie on how Miley Cyrus reveals just how tame pop culture has become

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  • sarcasmic||

    I'm so fucking sick of that skank! Can she die by misadventure already!

  • Pro Libertate||

    It's unclear where she lands on the Lohan Scale.

  • Certified Public Asskicker||

    Mean Girls Lindsay Lohan, please come back.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    She isn't a known drug addict, the police haven't arrested her, her boyfriend appears fairly straight-laced.

    Miley Cyrus seems less a self-destructive emotional cripple (Lohan) and more of an eccentric, "shock the squares" type.

    People have been singing about sex, drugs, and rock n' roll since at least the 60's. How much new ground is there to break?

  • Pro Libertate||

    I've heard a theory that Katy Perry is actually some clean-cut religious girl, which, apparently, there's some evidence of. So you could be right.

    Personally, I think she actually is on Lohan street. My crazdar is going off.

  • Calidissident||

    Katy Perry actually started out as a Christian singer

  • Pro Libertate||

    See? More evidence. She probably prays for forgiveness after displaying her bosoms for money. Which she does a lot, even for a performer.

  • Goldwin Smith||

    eccentric, "shock the squares" type.

    How original.

  • SIV||

    Lindsay's hotter. Miley is (presumably) tighter.

  • Hopfiend||

    I like girls and all but that shit is just nauseating.

  • Wizard4169||

    I dunno, South Park did an episode that was actually sympathetic to her. Let's face it, when Stone and Parker suggest that you're over the line, maybe you should listen. (These are guys who actively make fun of THEMSELVES!) Miley's VMA performance was fairly horible, but she's going to have to get worse than that before I blow a gasket.

  • Mongo||

    What Miley did wasn't twerking. It was some sort of strip club dance.

    Twerking is where the pelvis torques front-to-back.

    That chick on Letterman didn't twerk either -- she was just dancing and shakin' her hips.

    Beyonce -- now THAT's twerkin'.

  • Killazontherun||

    Hate the butt wobbling; the only thing it tells me is this, the woman hasn't had the proper experience to brace herself before the train wrecks up in side of her thighs. It should be a skinner reflex by now to keep those knees bent strict and tight with ass firm and up if Jay-z is properly equipped to pull it off a proper fucking.

  • Killazontherun||

    Sorry for the extra words thrown in there -- I've got beer waiting for me in a little more than an hour, and my blood alcohol is at an uncomfortable 0% at the moment.

  • Mongo||

    I was wondering what you were trying to say. I thought you were talkin' street!

  • sloopyinca||

  • Killazontherun||

    No, that's just sobriety driven anger, a closely related dialect in some respects. Around here, about eleven am Sunday mornings hanging around the convenience store as the blue law restrictions are lifted.

  • playa manhattan||

    What is the lucky brew? I made a costco run yesterday. Fridge full of Hop Stoopid and Talon Double IPA

  • Killazontherun||

    For starters, the Gulden Draak sampler six pack. GD, GD 9000, Bornem double and quadrepel, Paraat, and Privateer.

  • playa manhattan||

    For starters, eh?

  • Killazontherun||

    Then, a pair of SN Bigfoots, and another pair of 21 amendment Lower da Boom barleywines. Though, I'm likely to share the later.

  • Calidissident||

  • Killazontherun||

    Athletic over sloppy. However, big can be athletic. Hence, the Williams sisters would be kind of interesting.

  • Calidissident||

    True, big can get sloppy and look bad. But IMO there is nothing sexier than a fit woman with a big booty.

    Take this GIF of Selena for an example. If you don't find that sexy, I don't know how you can call yourself a straight man.

    http://31.media.tumblr.com/304.....r3_250.gif

  • Killazontherun||

    I linked this a few months ago.

    http://blogs.miaminewtimes.com.....t_shot.jpg

    Ain't nothing wrong with that.

  • Calidissident||

    Sofia Vergara is one fine woman, and I don't give one measly fuck that she's twice my age. And if you haven't noticed, I'm a big fan of Latinas in general

  • Killazontherun||

    Another repost. Here's the wife if you dig Latina.

    http://goo.gl/IP1LlQ

  • Calidissident||

    She looks nice. Good catch Killaz. Is she Isleña like you?

  • Killazontherun||

    She's half Puerto Rican and half Connecticut Yankee. Well, mostly the maternal family is from Delaware though a bit scattered around, those two words, 'Connecticut' and 'Yankee' sound better together.

  • Calidissident||

    Growing up on the West Coast, I only know one Puerto Rican girl personally, but she is absolutely stunning. Gorgeous face, slim waist, flat stomach, and a breathtaking (literally) booty. From my limited sample size, I definitely approve of the Boricuas

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    This bitch twerks better than Miley.

  • Mongo||

    Ha-haw!

  • ||

    So my coworker has exposed me to this dadaist interpretation of Miley twerking. I'm confused, but she finds it HYSTERICAL.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    I learned that the sound of shaking a raw chicken is undeniably sexual.

  • ||

    I was a little surprised by that too.

  • playa manhattan||

    It is my hope that you can find a way to link to this video at least once a day.

    And I see it is up to 20,700 views today...

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    I'll keep up the good fight.

  • Certified Public Asskicker||

    I realize it's just fucking Maxim and I should let it go, but putting her at the top of a list known as the "Hot 100" really bothers me.

  • Mongo||

    I think she looks hawt -- however she talks like a braying donkey.

  • Certified Public Asskicker||

    She's your #1?

  • Mongo||

    Back in her Hannah Montana dayz, she was.

  • Calidissident||

    Eh, she used to be decent looking (though I never thought she was amazing or anything like some guys did) but she just doesn't do anything for me the way she looks now

  • ||

    I don't think I'd ever seen her before this fake scandal popped up. She looks like Madonna (did 30 years ago).

  • Calidissident||

    I'm young (I think she's a few months older than me IIRC) so I've been aware of her since she became famous, although I've never been a fan. Like I said, I thought she was cute when she first got famous, but now I simply do not find her attractive

  • Killazontherun||

    The fact she lost the jiggly side haunches moved her up a notch for me. She embraced the pain, which means she'll do a lot of bad things that a pleasantly plump girl never will. Probably expects you to blindfold her gently lead her to a well cushioned chair and feed her strawberries dipped in chocolate by hand, and then after you help her to a good belch, fucked by a condom made of goose feathers.

    Skinny girl who has to work out and diet hard to get there though . . .

    'I'm going to step out and grab a bite to eat. You sure you don't need me to untie you? That knot looks awfully painful.'

    'No. I'm good.'

    'Bring you something back to eat then?'

    'Nothing taste as good as skinny feels. Nothing taste as good as skinny feels.'

  • John||

    I bet that caused Derick Jeter to give up on his quest to nail the entire hot 100 list.

  • Killazontherun||

    He nailed the Direct TV goddess. I bow before him. Jeter is Lord!

  • John||

    The genie chick? She doesn't do it for me. But Minka Kelly on the other hand...

  • Killazontherun||

    I say by the sundial in the middle of her face

    http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_cZua....._Kelly.jpg

    that picture was snapped around 7:30.

  • John||

    Kelly has always done it for me. She is sort of the golden mean of womanhood. Tanned but not too tanned, thin but with curves, but not too many curves and so forth. When I think of the all American brunette, I think of her.

  • JW||

    I'll gladly take your rejects, if they're all like her.

    And the Genie chick is creepy looking. Hawt, but very creepy.

  • Doctor Whom||

    What sort of country have we become if it is perfectly legal to act like a devil and flick her tongue as deamons (or even demons) do (since that complainer has presumably actually watched demons flick their tongues and thus knows how they do it)? Won't someone please think of the not yet demonically possessed children?

  • Doctor Whom||

    Is anyone else not at all surprised that the "educator" submitted such a poorly written complaint?

  • Rights-Minimalist Autocrat||

    I had to watch that for four minutes. Four. MINUTES!

    I was so disturbed I couldn't reach my remote.

  • ||

    As an educator I have to stand up and say, ‘Enough is enough.’

    As a software engineer, I have to stand up and say, "Go fuck yourself."

  • Drake||

    Why? Did somebody ask you to do some work?

  • ||

    Hell, no! The boss is on vacation for two weeks, so the mice are at play.

  • Certified Public Asskicker||

    Oh snap! The educator card, sit down and listen!

  • Killazontherun||

    You laugh, people, but the education card is a four of clubs. Depending on the game, there is a potential set of eleven cards in the deck that fall beneath it.

  • Certified Public Asskicker||

    The female minority educator card, nothing beats it.

  • Drake||

    MTV is a cable channel, right? (I swear it was broadcast back in the early 90's when I lived in LA and was too broke for cable.)

  • R C Dean||

    That was my question. Why are people complaining to the FCC about a non-broadcast show?

  • itsnotmeitsyou||

    Simple answer: People are stupid.

    How many times have you heard about some dumbass calling 911 because they didn't get the right order at McDonalds or something?

    Sheeple will call whatever "authority" they are aware of at the drop of a hat and DEMAND that something be done immediately.

  • ||

    Have you seen this by any chance, itsnotmeitsyou?

  • itsnotmeitsyou||

    Never seen that before. I wish I could say it is shocking, but 10+ years in retail has numbed me to any type of crazy behavior in response to insignificant issues.

    I once had someone go into a ranting fit at my manager and have to be forcefully removed from the store because I told them to have a nice day...

  • ||

    Yeah, I had a woman flip the fuck out because she was in her late 30s and I called her "ma'am". I'm fairly certain she was tweaking hard at the time since she'd come back to complain about the lettuce on a sandwich she'd bought "10 minutes ago" (really it was four hours earlier at the beginning of my shift) and was ranting like a lunatic.

    I just like that this woman talks about going super sayin and taking her ultimate form while she's assaulting the poor worker.

  • ||

    I didnt even know who she was. If you watch TV pop culture shows, you get what you deserve.

    Sarcasmic, she is a child. Leave her alone.

  • ||

    “As an educator I have to stand up and say, ‘Enough is enough.’”

    Because educators are held in such high esteem.

  • DontShootMe||

    She's complaining because the teenage boys she is banging are going to expect her to know these moves....

  • ||

    I complained that the VMAs were on again but nobody listened...

  • ||

    “I was subjugated to 4 minutes of Miley Cyrus.”

    Um...is the OFF position of your teeeveee's ON/OFF switch deactivated?

  • DontShootMe||

    ^This^ I think the FCC has a role. Anybody who complains to the FCC gets kidnapped in the dead of night by one of America's many surplus SWAT teams, and forced to spend 4 months in a re-education camp, after which they can only leave if they demonstrate limited skills with a remote control.

    Holy cats people, if you don't like what's on TV, watch something else, or turn it off!

  • Mongo||

    The hypster music channel The Current on Minnesota Public Radio this morning censored the word "whore" from that PJ Harvey song.

  • John||

    Isn't Harvey beloved by feminists? Isn't it supposed to be okay when the right kind of people use offensive words?

  • Killazontherun||

    Holy crap. Love her 4 track demo CD. Could teach Ry Cooder a thing or two about getting a slide guitar to growl.

  • johnl||

    The Current is the world's 2nd best radio station, after KCRW.

  • Killazontherun||

    That sounds expensive, why don't we just send the rape yetis?

  • Goldwin Smith||

    That would require the return of the remaining Web of Fear episodes.

  • Cdr Lytton||

    So that's why the BBC wiped the tapes.

  • sloopyinca||

    What the fuck is a "VMA's"?

  • Mongo||

    Vitiosus magistra Astaroth.

  • sloopyinca||

    I'm actually proud of Miley. There aren't that many females out there that have had double mastectomies and are still willing to wear a bikini in public like that.

    The Komen crowd ought to get her to be a spokesmodel.

  • ||

    Hey there, judgey mcjudgerson, do you not remember this picture?

  • John||

    She is a cutey. Cyrus' problem is that she is homely and makes up for it by being a pig. Her small breasts are not really the issue.

  • sloopyinca||

    Oh man, that girl is cute as a button.

    And besides, she's petite and her little boobies fit her frame. Cyrus is a flat-chested pig.

  • John||

    Between this and Lena Dunham running around naked on Girls, we live in the age of ugly vulgarity. If Dunham didn't kill sexy, Cyrus certainly did.

  • Mongo||

    The war was lost when obese people are shown with regularity on tha teevee.

  • sloopyinca||

    I'm reminded of the Rent A Center commercial that should come with a bottle of eye bleach.

  • Goldwin Smith||

    MTV should feature a rape scene. The feminist outrage will be fun!

  • Goldwin Smith||

    So where's the next post where Old Man Gillespie complains about teh yutes for acting differently then when he was younger?

  • The Late P Brooks||

    Somebody should photoshop a dollar bill into that black guy's hand.

  • ||

    Some has posted this before.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCKeyCc6-Zc

    Now this chick is hot, even though she is showing less skin, and knows how to shake her hips.

  • ||

    Work safe and for brunette fans.

  • JW||

    I'll be le bunque.

  • Rasilio||

    Ok I really don't care about Miley's dance moves one way or the other and think anyone who found her act to be too erotic needs to have their heads examined because there was absolutely nothing even remotely sexually enticing about it.

    My real question stems from the picture used for this article.

    Why the hell is her tongue out like that?

    I get that she was desperately trying to be sexy (failing miserably but trying), and that facial expressions like that have become somewhat commonplace in certain sectors of the porn industry but why? I mean it takes a normally beautiful woman and makes her look angry and ugly, what the hell is the origin of this bizzare sexual display?

  • JW||

    Why the hell is her tongue out like that?

    This, a thousand times this. There is no faster way to confirm that you are, in fact, a drooling idiot.

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