Obama Finds Friendly Audience in Berlin, Online Poker a Lifesaver for Pakistani Child, Hoffa Hunt Comes Up Empty Again: P.M. Links

  • "I call and raise you a kidney"Credit: Felix Hammer, Florian Thauer, Lothar May, Oskar Lindqvist / Foter.com / CC BY-SAIn a speech in Berlin, where they love him far more than Americans do, President Barack Obama defended the United States' surveillance program, proposed new talks with Russia to cut back on nuclear weapons, and promised to keep trying to close the Guantanamo Bay prison.
  • Online poker saves lives! A friendship that resulted from two people playing online poker together eventually led to lifesaving surgery for one man’s young Pakistani son.
  • Outgoing LA Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa says he expects to run for governor of California. If the state’s Republican Party can’t put up somebody capable of beating him there truly is no hope.
  • Sen. Lisa Murkowski of Alaska has become the third Republican senator to declare support for gay marriage recognition.
  • A documentary alleges a cover up at the National Transportation Safety Board obscured the real reasons behind the explosion of TWA Flight 800 in 1996, in which 230 were killed. Former members of the investigation team have come forward to say the explosion came from outside the plane, not due to an internal accident.
  • The FBI has abandoned its latest effort to dig up the remains of Jimmy Hoffa.

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  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Online poker saves lives! A friendship that resulted from two people playing online poker together eventually led to lifesaving surgery for one man’s young Pakistani son.

    So Republicans have TWo reasons to stop them at the border.

  • A Serious Man||

    Online poker saves lives! A friendship that resulted from two people playing online poker together eventually led to lifesaving surgery for one man’s young Pakistani son.

    They bonded over the fact that the Feds want to kill both online poker and the Pakistani kid.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    They thought they had gotten two stones with one ban.

  • ||

    I applaud your brilliant effort to unseat He Who Shall Not Be Named.

    Keep fighting the good fight!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Sen. Lisa Murkowski of Alaska has become the third Republican senator to declare support for gay marriage recognition.

    Gay son?

  • Ska||

    No, just really into feeldo porn.

  • Marc F Cheney||

    Wait wait wait. Alaska has senators? What's next, a dog for president (akak President Pooch)?

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    I bet their prison uniforms will be fabulous!

  • RBS||

    I had no idea Dolce and Gabbana were actual people.

  • Jerry on the boat||

    No it's ice cream.

  • A Serious Man||

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    I hate hipsters.

  • ||

    The more you repress your longing for artisinal mayonnaise the worse it will become.

  • ||

    That's really, really dumb. So I kind of like it.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Fuck that shit.

  • Fatty Bolger||

    I don't care about the hipsters part, but it's interesting to see them in modern clothing.

  • JW||

    I was 'shopping statues before anyone ever thought of doing that.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    The FBI has abandoned its latest effort to dig up the remains of Jimmy Hoffa.

    Hoffa, living under an assumed name, owns an excavation company.

  • AlexInCT||

    And he is union and does a lot of work for the feds? Like digging up potential Hoffa graves?

  • Agammamon||

    He specializes in it and is a preferred contractor so he can get the cushy no-competition bids.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    I call and raise you a kidney!

    No.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Another friend told me she wanted to smack me three ways from Sunday for even making the appointment, saying the politics of the waxing down there were anti-feminist and offensive.
  • Irish||

    That is the greatest sentence in American history.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    There aren't any politics about grooming yourself.

  • John||

    How horrible it must be to let politics rule every aspect of your life.

  • ||

    Actually I think it gives people a sense of comfort knowing that Daddy is telling them what to do. Honestly there must be a decent marketing scheme for the Michelle Approved (TM) Lifestyle that will make Mrs. O rich(er) post the white house years.

  • John||

    That is actually brilliant. Michelle could become the new Oprah. She could have a whole magazine and set of products for these doofuses to use. She could become a billionaire.

  • ||

    She isn't affable enough. Oprah gets away with telling everyone what to do because people feel she's an everywoman concerned about everyone's well being and going out of her way to figure out the best way to achieve that.

  • John||

    These people don't want affable. They want to be ordered.

  • ||

    I swear, just branding a bunch of vegan frozen dinners would net eight figures.

  • Hash Brown||

    "If you do it, then the boys will expect all of us to do it!"

  • ||

    "The politics of waxing down there"

    I so very, very hope that people who politicize everything are as miserable as they seem they must be. Because they fucking deserve it.

  • ||

    The Politicized Life is Destroying Society.

    I was planning to post this and am not shocked at all that you provided a segue.

  • ||

    Welcome to TEAM. It's incredibly pervasive and horribly poisonous.

  • trshmnstr||

    Identity politics is so much easier of a game to play, and the statists know it. It's why people legitimately believe that the other side is "hateful". You're not attacking a principle or an idea, you're directly attacking them when you go against their statist ideas.

  • ||

    Yeah, TEAM works so much better for the scumbag politicians that they encourage it. And the moron sheep play right along.

  • John||

    I hope so too. What a pathetic existence. They literally have no will of their own. She can't just say "I love hair down there". No, her politics make the decision for her.

  • Killazontherun||

    That is a great way of putting it, and an easy way to get out of those waste of time conversations that they try to draw you into, 'so, your politics make your decisions for you?

  • Mickey Rat||

    Her just not wanting to wax down there does give her sufficient ability to try and shame her friends who do want to do that.

  • Mickey Rat||

    "does not"

  • ||

    When it's your life's goal to control everything everyone else does, it's inevitable that every single thing imaginable becomes politicized.

  • T||

    It's very rare that I wholeheartedly agree with you, but on this you are indeed correct.

  • ||

    I'm convinced they are miserable, not because they politicize everything, simply because they have no fucking sense of humor.

  • Rights-Minimalist Autocrat||

    Worthless without pics.

  • ||

    I was thinking the same thing....befores and afters.

  • MJGreen||

    Good thing the other friend who wanted to "smack her three ways from Sunday" was a feminist. Anyone else saying that would be shamed for days. RAPE CULTURE!

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Russian tycoon wants to transfer minds to machines

  • Brandon||

    I really hope the first person to go through this' first words are "I have returned."

  • Agammamon||

    "I live . . . AGAIN!"

  • Brandon||

    That game sucked.

  • Mickey Rat||

    Greg Egan - Learning To Be Me

    http://bookre.org/reader?file=223020

  • Eduard van Haalen||

    What's he talking to the media for? He should just buy his own private island, like Dr. Moreau and every other supervillain. Because I assume he is going for an army of evil Cybermen robo-slaves here, otherwise what's the point?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Former members of the investigation team have come forward to say the explosion came from outside the plane, not due to an internal accident.

    Which had nothing to do with the naval excercise taking place in the area.

  • Cliché Bandit||

    My tinfoil hat from that era could use a dry cleaning and resizing. On the to do list for tomorrow.

  • trshmnstr||

    (Obama) proposed new talks with Russia to cut back on nuclear weapons

    How long have we been waiting on this? It's after the election, and he's been working on his "flexibility".

  • A Serious Man||

    Men's Wearhouse fires founder and spokesman George Zimmer.

    Well shit, now how I am supposed to be reassured that I'm going to like the way I look?

  • Matrix||

    damn you... beat me to it

  • ||

    Please don't tell me you buy your suits at Men's Warehouse.

  • Matrix||

    yeah, the Warehouse down the block got theirs that fell off the back of a truck

  • ||

    Hey, their prices are great! And, um, the quality is something.

  • Certified Public Asskicker||

    Where do you buy yours? Joey B? As a former warehouse employee I laugh at you.

  • Emmerson Biggins||

    I'm supposed to have more than one suit?

  • Stormy Dragon||

    George Zimmer should start a new store and call it TrayvonMart.

  • NeonCat||

    Tailored hoodies FTW.

  • Numeromancer||

    ”Our prices will blow you away!”

  • As my bones grew/they did hurt||

    Fuck. He was a passionate supporter of cannabis law reform.

  • John||

    http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06.....ml?hp&_r=0

    FBI investigated 150 shootings never once found one of its agents at fault.

    Current and former F.B.I. officials defended the bureau’s handling of shootings, arguing that the scant findings of improper behavior were attributable to several factors. Agents tend to be older, more experienced and better trained than city police officers. And they generally are involved only in planned operations and tend to go in with “overwhelming presence,” minimizing the chaos that can lead to shooting the wrong people, said Tim Murphy, a former deputy director of the F.B.I. who conducted some investigations of shootings over his 23-year career.

    Because nothing makes a situation safer than having a bunch of armed baboons running around.

  • ||

    Well, if they're better trained than city police officers, and they are never at fault, then this just makes sense, right?

  • Agammamon||

    "And they generally are involved only in planned operations and tend to go in with “overwhelming presence,” minimizing the chaos that can lead to shooting the wrong people. . ."

    Uh, Waco anyone?

  • Virginian||

    I think the youngest person killed at Waco was about three months old. Guess she was the right person.

  • ant1sthenes||

    Hey, they said shooting the wrong people, they didn't say anything about burning or asphyxiating them.

  • Irish||

    U.S. is world leader in sperm exports because of the free market.

    AMERICA!

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Well, duh. If you're buying a baby template, you're going to go for the good stuff.

  • Killazontherun||

    5% of the world's population, but 500% of the bad ass. America, fuck yeah!

  • ||

    Actually, it's because America has a relatively low percentage of gingers...thanks to the free market!

  • rts||

    Wearing a mask at a riot becomes a crime today

    A bill that would ban the wearing of masks during a riot or unlawful assembly and carries a maximum 10-year prison sentence with a conviction of the offence is scheduled to become law today.
  • Matrix||

    what about police wearing riot gear and swat gear that covers their faces?

    Probably won't stand long in the US, as it is clearly a 1st Amendment issue.

  • rts||

    Sorry, this is a story from Canuckistan, where this is clearly a Charter issue, but will probably stand because it's so "reasonable".

  • some guy||

    Probably won't stand long in the US, as it is clearly a 1st Amendment issue.

    You'd like to think that. But there have been many decisions that were clearly X Amendment issues that were upheld.

  • ant1sthenes||

    what about police wearing riot gear and swat gear that covers their faces?

    This is why every libertarian who is able should study law and become a prosecutor. The only way shit will change is if powerful people are fucked up the ass with the spiked dildo of (in)justice they've built. And yeah, you won't have much of a career, but I guess it will be the legal equivalent of a suicide attack.

    But seriously, I would love it if one us assholes filed charges against every officer there and defended it by saying "the law is the law".

  • Rich||

    ***cough***Burqas***cough***

  • Agammamon||

    These sorts of laws are bullshit - in many jurisdictions its an extra crime to wear a bullet-proof vest when committing a crime also.

  • Hugh Akston||

    You know who else found a receptive audience in Berlin?

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    JFK?

  • Hash Brown||

    The Beatles?

  • John||

    No, that was Hamburg.

  • A Serious Man||

    Ich bin ein Berliner!

    I am a jelly-filled pastry!

  • RBS||

    Pink Floyd?

  • ||

    David Hasselhoff?

  • grrizzly||

  • NeonCat||

    Liza Minnelli?

  • Sidd Finch||

    The Hoff?

  • Sidd Finch||

    damn it

  • ||

    PWN'D

  • ||

    The Stasi?

  • Fatty Bolger||

    promised to keep trying to close the Guantanamo Bay prison.

    Keep fucking that chicken.

  • Ska||

    /Ernie Anastos

  • Agammamon||

    I don't know why he has such a hard time doing this. Worst case scenario, bus all the prisoners to the main gate and release them to Cuba, then send everyone home.

  • Irish||

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    what about Fine Arts majors?

  • ||

    They have a job market?

  • ||

    You get what you pay for.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Yes, it's absurd that people pay enough to buy a small house to get an education that's almost useless.

  • ||

    I mean, I get that we're all pretty stupid when we're 18, but...come on. You don't have to be actively retarded.

  • ||

    They're stupid and being told by 90% of the "older, wiser" people they know to do something really fucking stupid. I do feel bad for teenagers about this.

  • As my bones grew/they did hurt||

    Look, college is more fun when you're not taking Linear Algebra @ 8:30am on a Friday.

    The engineering folks traded a sucky time at college for an enjoyable career after graduation. Shrewd.

  • Brett L||

    Look, college is more fun when you're not taking Linear Algebra @ 8:30am on a Friday.

    Or working your way through Transport Phenomena problems all fucking weekend.

  • John||

    I had Calc I five days a week at 7:30 am. Damn that was a long semester.

  • robc||

    The engineering folks traded a sucky time at college for an enjoyable career after graduation.

    I enjoyed my time in college, so I dont know what you are talking about.

  • Sidd Finch||

    Linear Algebra was the slacker's elective since we learned all of it in required classes.

  • trshmnstr||

    Look, college is more fun when you're not taking Linear Algebra @ 8:30am on a Friday.

    If Linear Algebra is what trips you up, you're probably washing out anyway.

    Being a computer engineer, it was the design labs that had me greeting the professors as they came in every morning.

  • trshmnstr||

    squirrels!!! stealing my italics tags

  • ||

    I only feel bad for the ones that aren't so stupid as to get a humanities degree. The humanities majors are too stupid to tolerate.

  • Hugh Akston||

    Hey I resent that comment and also need to borrow $20!

  • Pro Libertate||

    To be sure, I have no problem with some people doing that who are fully aware of what they're getting into.

  • Outlaw||

    I was one of those teenagers and I hate the bastards who told me that.

  • ||

    Be forewarned. The next thing they will tell you is that your marriage can overcome any obstacle so long as you just love one another enough.

  • Brandon||

    It's even more absurd that they can borrow that amount, but would not be able to borrow half the amount to buy a house that is at least security for the debt.

  • ||

    Government subsidies FTW!

  • Pro Libertate||

    I have an idea. End government subsidies and control over student loans. Also, make them dischargable. Then loans won't be made unless the lender thinks the borrower can repay them with interest.

  • A Serious Man||

    As a recent poli sci graduate I'm glad I have someone to look down, just like how the rest of Europe is glad they can look down on the Irish.

  • Irish||

    The rest of Europe should check their goddamn privilege.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    You sound remarkably sober about the situation.

    Not because you're Irish, heavens no; I just expect us libertarians to be pitch-drunk by the time the PM Links roll around.

  • Irish||

    I have pretty good tolerance. I'm Irish. Our breast milk is 27% alcohol.

  • ||

    Two more reasons to seek out hot irish redheads, then.

  • Marc F Cheney||

    You'd have more luck seeking out a mermaid (or, if you prefer, a reverse mermaid).

  • ||

    Which explains why so many Irish infants die from butt chugging it.

  • ||

    Hey, I just finished lunch. Lunch is a nice time for me to sober up from my Irish coffee(s) enough so I can get home to have my evening Irish mule(s).

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    I prefer to stay in a constant half-drunk stupor during the waking hours. Makes life more interesting.

  • As my bones grew/they did hurt||

    You guys gave us Morrissey, right?

  • some guy||

    If you pay for college you'd better either learn something that involves math or make a lot of connections to powerful people. Otherwise you're wasting your money.

  • Killazontherun||

    That title for the lulz. Inhumane. Bwahahahaha!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    In a speech in Berlin, where they love him far more than Americans do...

    They love their cult of personality.

  • Rights-Minimalist Autocrat||

    Know who else gave a speech in Berlin?

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    JFK?

  • ||

    Oh, come one. It's not like they usually go batshit crazy for charismatic leaders with messiah complexes.

  • Matrix||

  • playa manhattan||

    On a geography related note, does anyone here play geoguesser?
    http://geoguessr.com

    South Africa and Australia look a lot alike to me...

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Wow, There goes my life

  • ||

    I totally love that site. Max score around 32K. (Using Google maps without searching, just for the larger screen size since theirs sucks. No time limit).

  • playa manhattan||

    What indicators do you use? In addition to general geography, I have relied on license plate shapes, the side of the road that the cars are on, street signs (obviously), architecture, and the type of farming/agriculture. Max score 26000, but I have only been playing since Friday...

  • ||

    Side of the road cars are on and street signs mostly. But terrain is good for distinguishing Australia from middle US although occasionally they throw in an African site. I find the random eastern European sites the hardest actually. When I got the 32K i got dealt a good "hand" and managed to locate each site within less than 0.3 km. I actually preserved that set as a challenge here.

  • BiMonSciFiCon||

    I always mix up Australia and Africa. I lived in South Africa for half a year, so I always pick it over Australia.

  • Tejicano||

    Generally, if it is the east coast of Australia I can figure it by the tint of the foilage. Everything seems to be just a bit of a lighter shade.

    Except for that stretch north of Cairns. Driving up that coast just reminded me of any number of forests in the US.

  • Cliché Bandit||

    New Jersey has a city called Sibling Love...appropriate.

  • Mickey Rat||

    That city is not in New Jersey.

  • Generic Stranger||

    Nevada means "Snow-capped" not "snowy".

  • Mickey Rat||

    "Middle-earth’s evocative “Midgewater”, “Dead Marshes” and “Mount Doom” are strikingly similar in nature to Europe’s “Swirlwater”, “Darkford” or “Smoky Bay”, as revealed by the Atlas of True Names."

    It is almost as if Middle-earth locations were named by a professional linguist!

  • Eduard van Haalen||

    I almost said "a cunning one" but my Dungeon Master would have me beheaded for blasphemy.

  • Mickey Rat||

    Stink Onions being the largest city in the Land of Those Who Speak Normally.

  • Mickey Rat||

    The ones named after people go into the etymology of the names, though some of them are questionable.

  • Damned Fool||

    Five Reasons to be a Feminist Man.

    "Gentlemen, you’re already soldiers in the War on Women. It’s time to switch sides."

    *Gag.*

    A friend put this on Facebook just now. She's an actual friend, so I'm going to avoid responding to it. Luckily for me, at least two other guys are already tearing it to shreds, so stupidity does not go totally unpunished.

  • Pro Libertate||

    War on Women. Fucking idiocy. I'm married to a woman and am raising girls. And my wife thinks these people are idiots, too.

  • Irish||

    I didn't know your wife was a tool of the patriarchy. Did you beat her until she submitted or something, you fucking oppressor?

  • Pro Libertate||

    What's funny about that is that my wife is pretty fucking tough and independent. Exactly what feminists hate the most.

  • Irish||

    Of course. Independent women don't do what feminists want them to and don't see themselves as victims.

    This makes it hard for feminists to coerce them into saying stupid shit, which is pretty much the lifeblood of feminism.

  • Damned Fool||

    Hard to tell someone with a spine that they're incapable of making decisions due to a vague patriarchy.

  • itsnotmeitsyou||

    What's funny about that is that my wife is pretty fucking tough and independent. Exactly what feminists hate the most.

    Sounds exactly like my wife too. Someone once thought she was a fellow feminist because she doesn't wear makeup or dress really girly. Watching her rip into the stupid cunt made me love her even more.

  • ||

    My wife hates their shit too and she's an engineer in the O&G industry. The kind of male dominated field that modern feminists all decry. She's far more independent than those collectivist circle jerkers.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Same with my wife. Worked as an R/N and then later as an OB/GYN, and loathed the very thought that she should take her marching orders as a woman from someone who did something so stupid as to major in Wymyns' Studies.

  • John||

    My neighbors have three daughters. They are total upper middle class. The parents both work for the World Bank. Each daughter is a bit hotter than the last. All three went to college with no debt. The older two are both married to guys who make really good incomes. The youngest just got out of college and traveled around SE Asia on her then b/f's dime. She now falls into one bar tending job after another because she is young and hot and hot female bartenders are good for business. They basically have never wanted for anything and have always had either their parents or some b/f to take care of them.

    Now, they are all three very nice people. I don't begrudge them their good fortune for a moment. But anyone who claims that attractive, upper middle and upper class white women are not the most privileged group in society is lying. War on women my ass.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    I want to help the youngest one.

  • ||

    Pix plz thx

  • John||

    They are hot. But they are not oh my God write home hot. But you wouldn't kick any of them out of bed, that is for sure. They are certainly hot enough to never have to worry about there not being a supply of guys willing to take care of them.

  • playa manhattan||

    That's not what Epi asked!

  • ||

    PIX OR GTFO

  • John||

    Since I have to live in the neighborhood, I have tried to avoid being seen taking pictures of the attractive daughters of my neighbors. That wouldn't win me a lot of friends.

  • ||

    Sounds like a consult from Warty in Modern Stalking is in order.

  • Rights-Minimalist Autocrat||

    You say you've avoided being seen, not that you've avoided taking pictures. Interesting.

  • Cliché Bandit||

    lol

  • Killazontherun||

    My neighbor and good friend's daughter is twenty three, got kicked out the Army last year for subordination, has tattoos all over her body, lean and muscular, looks like a boyish Demi Moore. Probably the opposite of the three lasses you describe in temperament, but damn if she isn't the hottest thing walking on two legs.

  • John||

    The tattoos would totally ruin it for me.

  • Killazontherun||

    I'm not big on them either, but it isn't a deal breaker.

  • As my bones grew/they did hurt||

    John's right; vandalizing your body with multiple tatts is trashy.

  • trshmnstr||

    My personal guidelines for "acceptable tattoos" are:

    Tragic death in the family
    Military service
    Insane life accomplishment (making it to the olympics, climbing Mt. Everest, etc.)

    Anything besides that seems a little trashy to me. However, I guess I'm a bit old-fashioned.

  • Killazontherun||

    Oh, and I hear that she is training to be a bounty hunter.

  • John||

    That is oddly compelling. Almost compelling enough to make up for the tats.

  • Brandon||

    How do you get kicked out of the Army for subordination? Isn't that the whole point of the Army?

  • Killazontherun||

    If you spent half the time demanding an edit button that you do picking through post with a typo, maybe this would be a non issue, maybe I would have fixed it before you noticed it, maybe, maybe [runs off waving hands frantically] why do people have to be so mean!

  • Brandon||

    But with an edit button, how would I get my daily dose of superiority?

  • Agammamon||

    Uh, shouldn't that be *in*subordination. I think subordination is what the military *wants*.

  • Agammamon||

    Huh, don't expect me to read all the replies before pouncing on someone who makes an obvious error.

  • Brandon||

    No, no, by all means, pile on. The illiterate fuckstick deserves it!

  • Killazontherun||

    If you two nerds got out of the library more you might have better things to do than correct the typos all day from those of with real lives who are too busy snorting blow from the navels of hookers, counting our fist full of blow money, and riding around in our blow powered speed boats with hot naked babes riding on the sides shooting blow out of their asses to the delight of clapping porpoises to give a damn about matters pertaining to literacy.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    The porpoises are also snorting blow off the hookers' asses, just in case that wasn't clear.

    BTW, great party last Thursday, Killaz.

  • Killazontherun||

    Hey, it was your Kid Rock collection that took it up to the next level. So don't sell yourself short.

  • playa manhattan||

    So the chicks farting blow is real?

  • Agammamon||

    Hey, I'm not at the library all day! I just spend all day at home in front of the computer.

  • Jumbie||

    So because she has the ideal characteristics of a parasite, number two in the food chain, you think that she's an example of number one in the food chain?

    I'm not following the logic that says that someone who's dependent on a man is in charge because of the magical power of pussy to manipulate men's minds or something. To me you can't be the most 'privileged' class of a society unless you've got a bit more control over the means of production than 'my man'll by me that.'

    Clearly there's feminist victimhood overplay in various places, but your example is crap for the point you're proposing and the point itself isn't very sound.

  • Coeus||

    I'm not following the logic that says that someone who's dependent on a man is in charge because of the magical power of pussy to manipulate men's minds or something. To me you can't be the most 'privileged' class of a society unless you've got a bit more control over the means of production than 'my man'll by me that.'

    You're missing the forest for the trees. It's not "my man will buy me that", it's "some man will buy me that, and looking for him is far less effort than getting a job to pay for it."

  • Virginian||

    Precisely. A drinking buddy of mine has a really hot girlfriend. He always sends her to the bar to get drinks for her and him. She never pays for them. Just finds some moron who will believe "My friend is in the bathroom, could you get two beers real quick?"

  • Agammamon||

    Some people are just horrible. I've known straight guys who hang out at gay bars just because the dudes will buy them drinks.

  • RBS||

    I couldn't make it beyond his opening bullshit.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    3: When women are in charge of stuff, they do a really good job.

    There are now more women in Congress than there have ever been before. 20% of the Senate is comprised of women.

    Congress is the first example you come up with?

  • Irish||

    And the congressional approval rating has been dropping for years!

    Clearly people hate women being in congress. We should ban it.

  • RBS||

    Clearly this guy is retarded.

  • ||

    Maybe if retards are in charge of stuff, they'll do an even better job!

    RETARDS FOR CONGRESS

  • rac3rx||

    Retards are already in Congress...duh!

  • Brett L||

    When women are in charge of stuff, they do a really good job.

    Bridezillas says otherwise.

  • itsnotmeitsyou||

    Bridezillas says otherwise.

    Yahoo! agrees.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Against my better instincts I took the plunge. The captioned pictures are cloying enough to gag a maggot.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Let me make this clear: I’m a dude.

    [snip]

    You should be a feminist because you should fucking be a feminist. So here are the five reasons why, helpfully illustrated with Feminist Ryan Gosling images. (Buy the Feminist Ryan Gosling book, it’s awesome!)

    Written by a man, my black ass.

  • MJGreen||

    What is it with these people and their use of "fucking"? I like to use it now and again to punch up a point, but it seems like every blog post about feminism features it two or three times.

  • trshmnstr||

    It says something about the quality and type of your argument when you can't make it without gratuitous and random cussing. Not that the occasional "colorful metaphor" isn't useful for making a point, it seems that feminists use it as a dog whistle to tip other feminists off that the following point is now part of feminist canon.

  • mad libertarian guy||

    It says something about the quality and type of your argument when you can't make it without gratuitous and random cussing.

    Horseshit.

  • ||

    Choosing not to, and being incapable of doing so, are two different thinks. Bastard.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    What the fuck do you fucking mean? Don't you fucking agree that it's a fucking great sign of goddamn writing talent to motherfucking litter your bitchin' essay with mild goddamn profanity for fucking emphasis where none is goddamn needed?

    All the great communicators from Cicero to Lincoln used crappy gifs, memes, and mild profanity to get their point across.

  • Eduard van Haalen||

    Yo, listen up motherfuckers, fourscore and seven fuckin' years ago, our fuckin' forefathers, etc.

  • Damned Fool||

    Barely stifled rage? Or what they wish they were getting?

  • ant1sthenes||

    Female supremacists are tiresome.

  • Matrix||

  • Irish||

    Feminism is the art of making everything dull and miserable.

  • Matrix||

    Yeah, pretty much

  • trshmnstr||

    It's even worse than that. It's the art of making everything as dull and miserable as the most dull and miserable failure of a woman on her most depression tinged bad day.

    In other words, feminism is welfare for boring women.

  • Matrix||

    The feminist world is listening to Janeane Garofalo go on and on in that dry monotone voice.

    Ugh, which is why I sometimes have a hard time watching Nostalgia Chick anymore since she's gone that whole Janeane Garofalo route.

  • Matrix||

  • playa manhattan||

    Will Obamacare will cover all of that bling?

  • T||

    Will it turn me blue?

  • ||

    Because what we need is more people with argyria.

  • itsnotmeitsyou||

    Hey, maybe I could finally convince people I actually am a Smurf.

  • ||

    I'd totally do it were it easily reversible.

  • Agammamon||

    And silver all by itself is a decent antibiotic. So I guess its amazing that when you add two antibiotics together the dose is more effective.

    I can see why I would never be a scientist.

  • ant1sthenes||

    Wow, libertarians are actually right about everything, not just most things.

  • Pro Libertate||

    "[Obama] promised to keep trying to close the Guantanamo Bay prison."

    So what's stopping him these past four plus years? A malignant dwarf that attacks him when he picks up the phone? A brain disorder? Renegade congressmen? Inability to pronounce Guantanamo? Evil Bush deathrays? What?

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Racism.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Racism rays? Emitted by Bush?

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Well, him and the rest of non-progressives.

  • Pro Libertate||

    You don't know the power of the Racism Rays.

  • Art Vandelay||

    Obviously it's Cheney. From his hidden volcano lair.

  • ||

    A malignant dwarf that attacks him when he picks up the phone?

    It was the way the dwarf spoke backwards that kept Obama from closing Guantanamo.

  • Pro Libertate||

    It's a common problem.

  • playa manhattan||

    I posted this a month ago, but here it is again: The reason why Villargarosa is running is because he is flat broke and has no other options:
    http://losangeles.cbslocal.com.....-for-jobs/

    And he will probably win.

  • ||

    And he will probably win.

    Don't say such vile and offensive things!

  • playa manhattan||

    You know it's true. And he will be even worse than Brown. I am starting to think pretty seriously about putting my house on the market.

  • ||

    I know you're right, but I reserve the right to experience intense denial until he takes office.

    Bonus: I'm a renter, and could theoretically telecommute.

  • playa manhattan||

    The only place I would really want to move is Palm Springs/Palm Desert/La Quinta. If only the AZ border was 100 miles closer...

  • ||

    I'd be inclined to move north, but I don't know that WA or OR are politically any better, and I'm sure they will worsen when Governor Villaraigosa drives CA even further into the sand.

  • Agammamon||

    Hmm, maybe I could scrape an army together and then annex me some California.

    But funding, funding, funding.

    I know - Kickstarter!

  • playa manhattan||

    The Riverside County Sheriff would gladly go with you. He is one of the only sheriffs in CA that will issue a CCW permit to anybody that is not prohibited.

  • Longtorso, Johnny||

  • Brett L||

    Jesus, it would be cheaper to just burn it to the ground for insurance.

  • Longtorso, Johnny||

    That suggestion would have made for an awesome press conference. "After sneaking out everything still valuable, we'll pour the gasoline here...." with a slide of a burning Dome in the background.

  • ||

    Despite the idiots in the comment section (and on every chron.com article about this) I get the feeling that most Houstonians would rather tear it down than spend $194 million on it.

  • Brandon||

    Did it even cost $194 big-large new?

  • Brett L||

    But, but, Elvis sang there once!

  • Brandon||

    And Bud Adams sat in it. Burn the fucker to the ground.

  • rac3rx||

    There are apparently several different proposals up for discussion, including one where they remove everything except the frame and roof and create a park or something.

    This has gone on a long time.

  • Stormy Dragon||

    House Republicans double down on Gingrich's plan to make the moon the 51st state:

    http://www.politico.com/story/.....93017.html

  • Matrix||

    sure, why not... we have extra money lying around not being used.

  • A Serious Man||

    Volokh on the Tester/Murphy proposed amendment to the Constitution. Here's the actual text of the proposal:

    Section 1. We the people who ordain and establish this Constitution intend the rights protected by this constitution to be the rights of natural persons.

    Section 2. The words people, person, or citizen as used in this Constitution do not include corporations, limited liability companies or other corporate entities established by the laws of any State, the United States, or any foreign state, and such corporate entities are subject to such regulation as the people, through their elected State and Federal representatives, deem reasonable and are otherwise consistent with the powers of Congress and the States under this Constitution.

    Section 3. Nothing contained herein shall be construed to limit the people’s rights of freedom of speech, freedom of the press, free exercise of religion, freedom of association and all such other rights of the people, which rights are unalienable.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Jesus, if the left would only get over the corporate bogeyman crap. It's like worrying about a gecko when a T-rex has you in its jaws.

  • NeonCat||

    "It's OUR T-rex, that's what makes it okay."

  • Pro Libertate||

    We are the T-rex, gnawing off our own limbs.

  • ||

    But ProL, those entities that don't have a monopoly on force and can only suck up to the entity that does have a monopoly on force are the real problem!

  • Pro Libertate||

    If I shot a spike through my skull, perhaps I could understand this type of reasoning.

  • Damned Fool||

    Sadly, that's how most people think.

  • John||

    That would mean that corporations would no longer be protected by any of the Amendments. So Congress could pass ex post facto laws and bills of attainder against them. They could confiscate their assets without any due process or compensation.

    That is pure insanity. And further it is based on the premise that corporations are somehow totally separate from their shareholders and employees. As if the government could confiscate all of the assets and shut down microsoft and in no way violate the rights of or harm everyone who works there or owns stock in the company.

  • Irish||

    Well if corporations don't want to have all their assets seized, then they shouldn't behave like Kulaks and wreckers and stop God King Obama from ushering us towards paradise.

  • Brett L||

    Wait until NYT and Huffpo realize they belong in section 1, not section 3.

  • Damned Fool||

    It's not a bug, it's a feature.

  • Pro Libertate||

    I'm not sure what it would do to limited liability in general, but I bet it would kill it. In which case our economy would implode completely. What a great idea!

  • Agammamon||

    Basically, you have rights as an individual but if you group up those rights go away.

  • VG Zaytsev||

    That would mean that corporations would no longer be protected by any of the Amendments. So Congress could pass ex post facto laws and bills of attainder against them. They could confiscate their assets without any due process or compensation.

    Look on the bright side.

    A republican congress could shut down every labor union in the country and sieze all their assets to drive a stake through their hearts.

  • Night Elf Mohawk||

    It says "Congress shall make no law..." It doesn't matter who benefits because the restriction is on Congress not those who speak, etc. This wouldn't change anything.

  • Pro Libertate||

    With an amendment like this, that might not hold.

  • Night Elf Mohawk||

    All in does is invalidate statutory and case law holding that a corporation is a person. It doesn't purport to limit the First at all with regard to speech.

    What constitutes "petitioning the government for redress of grievances" might be interesting, but it doesn't limit speech qua speech at all.

  • Pro Libertate||

    I'm not so sure. Who has speech rights, anyway? Even for corporations, the real reasoning is that they are groups of people.

  • Agammamon||

    It does - its basically saying that groups rights are inferior or non-existent compared to individual rights.

    Its as if I have the right to say whatever I want as long as I'm not doing that as the spokesperson of a company or other type of group.

  • ||

    These are the same people who love democracy. The cognitive disconnects are legion.

  • SweatingGin||

    I keep wanting to bring up to these people, a much simpler change to the first amendment:

    Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech except in cases involving two or more people and involving an exchange of value, wherein Congress shall have the full power to ban and confiscate the product of such collaboration, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble except in cases involving two or more people and involving and exchange of value, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

    I figure that gets what they're going for. Asking them to define corporation is pretty fun. Reductio-ad-absurdem'd, two people working together on some political speech (ie, you do the voice over, I'll edit the video) implies a corporation.

  • ||

    So, people's rights are inalienable, except when people exercise their rights together.

  • Killazontherun||

    They spend all of their itty bitty intellectual capital on rationalizing why corporations are immoral and bad for society, but don't dare call them a bunch of socialist.

  • Matrix||

    M$ might be giving up that whole DRM BS and requiring connectivity every 24 hours
    Guess they decided they actually wanted to MAKE money.
    Of course, this could be misinformation... intention or not... to boost preorders.

  • ||

    Septa police beating a guy in the subway concourse

    Mysteriously, the rest of the cell phone video disappeared after the cops got a hold of the phone.

  • A Serious Man||

    Brace yourselves for the onset of peak derp: Reports say Obama is preparing to make climate change the next big domestic issue.

    WASHINGTON — President Obama is preparing a major policy push on climate change, including, for the first time, limits on greenhouse gas emissions from new and existing power plants, as well as expanded renewable energy development on public lands and an accelerated effort on energy efficiency in buildings and equipment, senior officials said Wednesday.

    Does this reek of desperation or what? Is he trying to sabotage his own party in the midterms?

  • John||

    That is a sign that the scandals are really hurting him with his base. Basically this is him buying liberals flowers and asking them to lie about where the bruises came from.

    My guess is liberals will be just fine with NSA surveillance if it comes with doing something about climate change.

  • A Serious Man||

    I thought it was hilarious when he tried to distract from the IRS scandal with his big foreign policy speech only for that to backfire with the NSA news.

  • ||

    Wow, he couldn't pick a worse hill to die on. Except guns. Which he already died on.

    This has much amusement potential.

  • John||

    I think it is because he has no choice. If liberals turn on him, he is done. And they are really pissed off and demoralized about this NSA thing. He has got to do something to get them to calm down.

  • ||

    But...climate change? The thing that's been horribly disgraced and has been losing steam for years now? That's what he chooses?

  • John||

    Yeah. He is talking to his base not you. Think about who his base is? They actually believe in that shit. It is a religion for them.

    I don't know if it will work. But betting that they are so stupid that they will think "sure Obama is setting up a police state, but he is the only one who can do anything about climate change", is not a totally unreasonable move. They just might be that stupid.

  • Rich||

    "It takes a village to raise a child, and it takes a police state to do anything about climate change."

  • Brandon||

    You didn't see the news today? The World Bank says Climate Change is going to increase poverty, so governments can never be blamed. Consensus!

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/.....63748.html

  • Brett L||

    Again, when Cary Tennis is going to counsel the Salontards about how to get past their false faith in government as a religion, the entire liberal political structure is in realistic danger of collapsing. "Look! Squirrel!" is, sadly, not the worst strategy in this situation.

  • VG Zaytsev||

    "Under my plan electricity rates will necessarily skyrocket"

    Yeah that's an electoral winner.

  • some guy||

    We can only hope so. If true, this will do nothing but waste time and make everyone look bad. Win-win for libertarians.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Sure. I say we ban all fossil-fuel use right now. This minute. Can't possibly hurt anything important, and Gaea will be saved.

  • MJGreen||

    Holy hell! This could be hilarious!

  • Emmerson Biggins||

    So he'll be proposing mandatory fracking in Europe? To bring down CO2 like we have, right?

  • NeonCat||

    Thousands evacuated in central Russia due to ammo dump explosions.

    http://rianovosti.com/military.....sions.html

    FTA: "A ministry spokesman told RIA Novosti the depot stores some 6,000 122-mm artillery shells as well as other ammunition and explosives, and, in the worst case scenario, the blasts could continue for two or three days."

  • Brandon||

    Governments can't be trusted with guns.

  • ||

    As a child, I always said I wanted to be rich enough that people would say I was eccentric instead of crazy.

    John McAffee needs more money.

  • ||

    That was the best thing I've seen in a long time.

  • Brett L||

    C'mon, he lived the libertarian dream. Private villa on a pirate isle with a rotating stable of hot chicks and lots of guns. OTOH, if people are going to give someone money to live that lifestyle, they can give it to me.

  • playa manhattan||

    So, he doesn't have stock in the company anymore, I'm assuming?

  • Agammamon||

    That was awesome.

  • Brett L||

    It appears that the gf and I have produced a boy fetus. Doc was pretty sure he was flashing his junk at us this morning. While we will not be raffling the middle name (that's sloopy and banjo's thing), We already have a first name and 2 pretty good last names for him to choose from. First name is William, middle name suggestions are welcome.

  • ||

    TIBERIUS

  • A Serious Man||

    LUC

  • oncogenesis||

    Alchemy

  • John||

    Edward or Henry. Go for one of the two greatest medieval English kings.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Or if he wants to continue in the Norman tradition, go for Bohemund or Roger.

  • SugarFree||

    William Henry gets you... BILL HANK. Awesome. "Yo, Bill Hank, what's happening?"

  • Agammamon||

    Better than Joe Bob or Billy Bob.

  • ||

    Yeah but then people will think he was named after a president, and we'll have to take Brett's monocle and top hat away.

  • Fatty Bolger||

    Or Will Hank, which inevitably leads to the nickname "Wank."

  • ||

    "Will hank for food."

    Sounds like something NutraSweet would say.

  • Brett L||

    William Peter and William Morris were both kyboshed by the gf because Willy Pete and Willy Mo were bad nicknames that she was very afraid I would deploy.

  • Jordan||

    But was he jacking it yet?

  • Brett L||

    Nope. Just waving it in our faces. Daddy was proud.

  • Fatty Bolger||

    No, Congressman.

  • ||

    Barack

  • playa manhattan||

    Depends on if you have a common (in the US) last name.

    My doctor is a white guy with the last name "Kim", so he made damn sure that he gave his daughters some unique first names...

  • Brett L||

    Obviously Western, not particularly common.

  • playa manhattan||

    Maybe something ending in a "Z" to help him get into college.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Charles Martel.

  • Brett L||

    William Carl-Martel L?

    I don't want him taking over France or Britain when he's supposed to be taking out the goddam trash.

  • ||

    Your last name is L? Then Kal, of course.

  • Brett L||

    Law, actually. But that's a bad word here. But since I'm out, now, we've considered and discarded Marshall.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Martel, of course, means "hammer," which is why I like it. However, note that Martel is close to Martial.

  • ||

    Are we throwing out all Law based compounds?
    Natural, Mosaic, Con...

  • playa manhattan||

    Bob Lob Law.

  • Outlaw||

    William Scoff Law

    He's either a lawbreaker or scoffs at the law. I APPROVE.

  • Pro Libertate||

    C. Law.

  • ant1sthenes||

    Destroy, then. Will Destroy Law.

  • Killazontherun||

    Wulf!

  • robc||

    William?

    Then the middle name is obvious: Robert

    That way, you can call him Billy Bob.

  • Sidd Finch||

    F

  • Agammamon||

    Super King Big Nuts

  • Art Vandelay||

    7

  • Art Vandelay||

    Or Wom Som. Or Tiggy Foo.

  • ||

    Wallace

  • A Serious Man||

    Trailer for Anchorman 2 released.

  • Cliché Bandit||

    Christ Scott, Your alt-text is a string bet. C'MON! You can't say "call" and the "raise". Verbal is binding.

  • Acosmist||

    Waiting for someone to throw a fit over the alttext.

  • Coeus||

    Donate your money to a worthwhile cause.

    And hurry, before the feminists realize the implications.

  • Brett L||

    "Because of the 'implications'."

  • Coeus||

    Sperm donors are a worthless if they don't come with a wallet attached. As we saw from the massive denial-fest yesterday.

  • Coeus||

    "And why do you keep saying it like that?"

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Milos Raonic has a new coach, but is his game the model for a Wimbledon winner?

  • ||

    No.

  • Art Vandelay||

    Who cares?

    The more important question is: when is women's tennis going to get some more hotties? There are very few left on the tour.

  • Brett L||

    Fuck you, France, cheese from South GA is making it big.

    We've met some of our favorite cheeses the way we've met some of our favorite friends -- unexpectedly, by happenstance and afterward, our lives were never the same. At least that's what happened when we met Green Hill by Sweet Grass Dairy in Thomasville, Georgia.

    Full disclosure, one of their salesguys is a friend of mine.

  • Pro Libertate||

    I like the idea of the U.S. totally conquering the cheese world, like we have with beer.

  • Coeus||

    Bill Clinton writes a game guide under a pseudonym.

    Pull out your cock and put her hand on it. Remember, she is letting you do this because you have established yourself as a LEADER. Don’t ask for permission, GRAB HER HAND, and put it right on your dick.”
  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    HAHAHAHAHAHA

    Who writes this shit, and who is so stupid that they take it seriously enough to write an impassioned critique?

  • Coeus||

    It's like everything else. "This is great, lets make it extreeeme!!!"

    I can't think of a single self help market that hasn't gone this way. Self-hypnotism- useful, let's really amp it up and make you an ubermensch with it. And then, BAM!, you've got Scientology.

  • A Serious Man||

    Hey guys, I think she is talking about us:

    Internet trolls love feminism

    But truthfully, that says far more about them that it does about us. By and large, feminist activists don’t spend our days obsessing over what Men’s Rights Activists or anti-feminists write on the internet because we have our own work, our own issues, our own lives to worry about. We have more pressing matters, like the all-out assault on abortion rights, or the rampant sexual assault in the military, or the violence directed at the trans* community, or the enduring gender wage gap, just to name a few, that demand our attention and energy. There are real world issues that need to be dealt with, and instead, these trolls spend their days attacking feminists online. What an epic waste of time and energy.

    Really?

  • ||

    Are there hat tips? We should have a prize for the first HampersandR commenter to get a malicious hat-tip.

  • John||

    She is ignoring you Serious Man. Don't you understand, she is ignoring you. She keeps telling you that she is ignoring you? Why won't you pay attention to her?

    our own issues

    And they certainly do have issues.

  • RBS||

    I don't care what you say ans here is an article to prove it.

  • AuH20||

    I mean, they are such fucking easy targets. What do you expect rapists trolls to do when you walk out into the street wearing that short skirt get on the internet and sound like a complete fucktard?

  • Coeus||

    If they would just stop pointing out our rampant statism and hypocrisy, we could stop having to waste time defending ourselves with logical errors and get all this wonderful legislation passed.

  • Matrix||

    Well, it's not like we disagree with trying to solve several of those issues. But the feminists frame them in such a way that is hard to take them seriously or even side with them. Much of their rhetoric draw eye-rolls or teeth-gritting from me and others.

    We can debate the abortion issues. Most sensible people want to decrease as much as possible the incidents of sexual assault in the military AND society at large, violence against not only the trans but ANY community, and disparities in marriage privileges and such.

    But that is really not ALL they focus their attention on, so they need to be honest with themselves. Taking every issue and turning it in a feminist war against the patriarchy is just absurd.

    They are as fucking looney as conspiracy theorists. Only difference is, conspiracy theorists elicit laughter.

  • A Serious Man||

    Perhaps I could take the attacks online feminists receive more seriously if they weren’t so sophomoric in nature: calling us “baby killers, “stupid,” “fat,” “ugly,” “man-haters,” “lesbians,” or a slew of sexist epithets simply reveals that for these anti-feminist trolls, it’s not about challenging our work or our arguments. They don’t have a genuine response to our work or thoughts, so instead, they call abortion “murder” and feminism “stupid.” These are not well-intentioned, well-crafted discussion points; they are ad hominem attacks that frankly, are junior high level, at best.

    Yeah, definitely talking about HnR.

  • AuH20||

    I think Nicole has taken apart their enthusiastic consent bullshit more than once.

  • MJGreen||

    Yes. Because if you want to have a civil, respectful debate with feminists, they will certainly oblige.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    And calling abortion murder is not an actual argument. It's an ad hominem.

  • ChrisO||

    As a white, straight, middle-class, able-bodied, cisgender woman, I know that because of the myriad privileged identities that I hold, the attacks I receive often pale in comparison to others.

    I'm going to guess that AT LEAST $200,000 was wasted in the rarefied college education that produced this level of insipid.

  • AuH20||

    Yet another feminist whose wild overpraise for their writing makes me feel like I am taking crazy pills: Kate of Autostraddle

    A butch walks into a sex shop to buy lube... and that’s it, there’s the punchline.

    A butch walks into a sex shop to buy lubricant, and immediately shoves it into their backpack. The butch is accompanied by a femme. The butch doesn't want people to see the two of them with this product and assume things, not because the act of sex that might require lube is a shameful or bad thing, but because the notion of allowing outside parties to understand intimate private acts is to hand over a very small part of the butch that they cannot afford to give. The butch is not great with trust. The butch has some massive trust issues that feel like twin stones tied to their shoelaces.

    The butch, of course, is me.

  • Irish||

    Are they ever happy about anything? You're in a fucking sex shop buying lube, presumably to go get laid with that sexy femme you've got with you.

    How can you not be happy in this scenario? Your life is going so well.

  • RBS||

    She can rest assured that the sex shop workers don't give a shit what she buys.

  • Irish||

    Yeah, the person she's worried is judging her is the sex shop attendant.

    That's what's great about sex shops. No matter what you do, no matter who you are or what you're buying, they have seen things far more embarrassing than whatever you're planning to get up to.

    Chill. It's a sex shop. Just roll with it.

  • nipplemancer||

    That's what's great about sex shops. No matter what you do, no matter who you are or what you're buying, they have seen things far more embarrassing than whatever you're planning to get up to.

    This is very true. I worked at a sex shop for a year once upon a time. My only issue was DVD rental returns. On more than one occasion the cap from a lube tube would be rattling around inside the case. I always made sure to wear gloves when processing the returns in the backroom.

  • AuH20||

    Um, duh, Irish:

    I know that whether I like it or not, a great deal of how I see and feel and discuss my sexuality is informed by my past, specifically trauma. I need to say this before I say anything else, because I come to sex from an incredibly specific place, and that place cannot always be translated well. My road to sex and sexuality had some hard fucking angles, and I did not always make it around the turn in one piece. When I say I don’t want to talk about it, I’m not giving you a political brush-off or even making a stand about boundaries or safe spaces. I’m saying that to have a conversation about my sex life is to do some paleontological excavating of all the fossilized parts of me that make up the layers of my past, and some of those fossils are not very fun to look at. Some of them still have teeth.

    I feel sort of sorry for her, in that she needs a lot of therapy, but so do like... 95% of the feminists I've read on the internet, and the perpetual victimhood ain't gonna help.

  • ||

    She's such a terrible writer. And for posting it here, I hope every word that you read causes you as much pain as that single paragraph would indicate.

  • Sidd Finch||

    Some of them still have teeth.

    What the fuck does that mean?

  • trshmnstr||

    She spend a lot of time in W. Virginia?

  • rac3rx||

    Vagina dentata...

  • Sidd Finch||

    You're probably overestimating the sexiness of the femme.

  • Brett L||

    The butch has some massive trust issues that feel like twin stones tied to their shoelaces.

    The writer has a problem with similies that is not metaphorical. Not to mention that unless the stones own the shoelaces, "their" is the wrong word.

  • AuH20||

    This is the same author as "Her voice sounds like a kiss after lemonade."

    Yeah, I still don't get that one either.

  • Irish||

    This is the same author as "Her voice sounds like a kiss after lemonade."

    What?

  • AuH20||

    The first example of her tripe I posted on reason, when I needed assurance that she was a bad writer.

    “I just love your hair,” the woman next to me says. Her smile is genuine. Her accent sounds like a kiss after lemonade. I could hug her in that moment. That is how grateful I am for the small kindness of her acknowledgment.

    It was her accent, but still. What the fuck accent is that supposed to be? Southern I guess?

  • Irish||

    I do not like to be exposed. I do not like to be gendered. I am about to be both, and neither.

    Wait, isn't being neither what she wants?

  • ||

    The writing is very much not helped by the insistent use of the third-person-plural to refer to the butch in question. Since it's the writer anyway, sticking with the first person would have made things a lot cleaner.

  • Irish||

    Nicole, asking for coherence, proper grammar, or proofreading from a feminist blog is bound to end in soul crushing disappointment.

  • ||

    I'm just saying, if you want to avoid using gendered pronouns and adjectives, there are better and worse ways to do so.

  • Irish||

    Stop goodwritersplaining to her, Nicole.

    Grammarsplaining has oppressed the feminist bloggers for years and is a tool of the patriarchy.

  • ||

    I also think there's something mildly interesting going on with respect to Goldwater's crazy pills. The writing that is the most terrible and yet the most universally praised shares two major qualities: it is confessional and very heavy on metaphor. Basically, what we are really seeing is not just an inability on the part of the reader to recognize bad writing vs. good, but such a strong inability to express themselves that they are amazed someone else has made even such a poor attempt at doing so. And by taking the bad writing as impressively introspective, they're strongly implying that not only can they not write themselves, they can't even think well enough about their own feelings to know that such sloppy and nonsensical metaphors are not helping to communicate said feelings.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    This phenomena is also known as the Stephanie Meyer Paradox.

  • ||

    Tell us what you really think, nicole.

  • ||

    Well, it's very hard for me to tell you what I really think, because I'm coming to this board from a specific place, and to translate that place into terms not only others, but especially retards, can understand, would be difficult. You see, I read a lot of books, and some of those books have teeth. Like the Monster Book of Monsters. Others are light and fluffy, like Agatha Christie. And others have some serious style. So when I come to this place, making hard, angled turns past English country house mysteries, through Nabokovian reveries, into light fantasy, finally arriving at a place where I feel comfortable squeezing the milk and sperm of human kindness with my fellow beings, and then I see something so triggering as ambiguously chosen possessive adjectives, I just...I just want to let my Monster book of Monsters loose on people, is all.

  • ||

    That was so terrible I think it gave me cancer. Well done. I've seen better writing from screenwriters in Godzilla movies.

  • SugarFree||

    The Nikki tries to femsplain to The Episiarch. The Nikki never hides her lube like a mother bird hides her precious baby eggs. The Nikki is accompanied by a genderqueer transquatch. The Nikki plans on eat the lube for dinner. The Nikki is very hungry. The Transquatch is very angry, like the oppression The Nikki feels coming off of the store clerk like the heat from the engine of a runaway train. The Nikki is that runaway train, waiting to be its own light at the end of the tunnel it makes for itself.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    On a scale of 0 to Marcotte, I'd say that rates at least 27 Ryan Gosling captioned JPEGs.

  • SugarFree||

    And she is displaying the mimetic fallacy as well, writing in a detached way to convey detachment rather than writing clearly about detachment.

  • ||

    I really don't understand why people give a fuck about what other people think. So someone thinks you're getting laid tonight. So what?

  • Brett L||

    I remember one summer during college, I went through the grocery store checkout line with flowers and a box of condoms about the time everyone else was getting out of church on a Sunday. I just smiled at the one or two double-takes I got.

  • A Serious Man||

    I've worked at a grocery store near a college campus and a surprising number of people buy condoms, lube, and a cucumber.

  • Brett L||

    "What? Its for a school project... for a friend."

  • ||

  • playa manhattan||

    Ahhh, the old M-320.
    "Celebrate the independence of your nation by blowing up a small part of it!"

  • SugarFree||

    [Marge reviews his purchases]

    "Homer, I don't know what you have planned tonight, but leave me out of it."

  • Eduard van Haalen||

    Do you at least still buy flowers?

  • trshmnstr||

    When you feel that you suck, you look to others for validation of your life.

  • ||

    What a terrible writer. You deserve the pain caused by reading that, Goldwater.

  • MJGreen||

    Re: your post this morning about Lindy West

    That's exactly what bugs me about Lena Dunham. I wouldn't give a shit about her, but her work is so mediocre yet so successful and praised that it can drive me up the wall sometimes. It really does feel like taking crazy pills.

  • paranoid android||

    James Taranto suggests Air Force's prosecution of alleged sexual assault was overzealous, Femosphere's collective head explodes:

    http://online.wsj.com/article/.....TopOpinion

  • A Serious Man||

  • Sidd Finch||

    brilliant

  • ||

    At "LiveLeak". Heh.

  • BuSab Agent||

    Okay I really did lol.

  • Enough About Palin||

  • trshmnstr||

    Just wait the 5 weeks until the obligatory blog bitchfest about how men are pigs because the hot ones ignore her while she's wearing her man repellant.

  • Brandon||

    Warty bait?

  • BuSab Agent||

    Oh dear Gods, that is vile!

  • Loki||

    In a speech in Berlin, where they love him far more than Americans do, President Barack Obama ...

    Of course they do. The Germans have always had a soft spot for narcissisctic tin plated dictators with huge cults of personality and delusions of God-hood.

  • Coeus||

    Christian S&M

    The Christian Domestic Discipline Yahoo! group, which is private, opens with a quote from Hebrews 12:11: "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." And, whom are we to train into righteousness and peace? Women only (duh)! The group's description goes on to say, "We offer a LOVING approach to all who wish to learn and grow in a traditional Male, head of household, female submissive, Christian Domestic Discipline relationship."
  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    The author of the OP is pretty cute. I guess she must be extra talented at the Victimhood Olympics for her to have been considered as a Jezebel front page writer.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    In defense of the somewhat absurd group being targeted by the OP, I don't see how you could call what they practice domestic abuse without also categorizing S&M under that banner, provided that both groups are consensual in nature.

  • SugarFree||

    No, they always hire a few cute ones to deflect the empirical fact that most of them are fat, hairy, angry and have a face like a bulldog licking piss off a needle.

  • ||

    I really don't think it counts as S&M if it doesn't seem pleasant at the time...

  • Coeus||

    Physical pleasure only? Or is there room for "the contentedness of spiritual fulfillment"?

  • Boomer||

    National Transportation Training Board? IIRC, NTSB = National Transportation Safety Board.

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