Predictable Election Day Messes, Predictable Russian Corruption, Vote for Master Chief!: P.M. Links

  • Happy Election Day! Everything’s a mess like it always is.
  • How about some election counterprogramming? Go play Halo 4 instead.
  • A judge invalidated the candidacy of a Nevada Assembly candidate just hours before voting started. Surveillance video suggested he didn’t live in the district where he was running.
  • A gunman at a chicken plant in Fresno, Calif., shot four people there before turning the gun on himself. One of the victims died. The rest, including the gunman, are in critical condition.
  • Vladimir Putin has fired Russia’s defense minister. Corruption and accusations of infidelity figure in heavily in a story that reads like a Russian soap opera.
  • European Union auditors have found the member nations are wasting billions of euros in how money is being spent even as spending cuts are a major political issue.
  • Just a reminder: Tonight and tomorrow Reason’s 24/7 feed will be focused in reporting election updates. And we have an RSS feed.

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  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Happy Election Day! Everything’s a mess like it always is.

    Well why won't someone tell me who's going to win???

  • Rich||

    Don't ask invisible furry hand. All she's good for is teasing about lottery numbers.

  • The Other Kevin||

    I'm with you, I'd like to know now so I can watch something else and get to bed early.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    I have officially given up on voting after 2 trips to the polling station which had over hour waits both times (at 7 am and at 530 pm).

  • The Hammer||

    NOOOOO!!! YOU HAVE GIVEN UP YOUR RIGHT TO COMPLAIN ABOUT ANYTHING EVER!!!

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Can I complain about the hour long wait in 40 degree temp?

  • ||

    On that note, any suggestions on best site to keep tabs of the results? I used cnn.com during the primaries and was basically satisfied.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    nationalpost.com has a good clean non-flash interface

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Those clowns in Washington are at it again!

  • ||

    PM Links on Election Day? What is this madness?

  • Doktor Kapitalism||

    Half the people are going to miss it with the amount of stuff they're putting up today.

  • Ted S.||

    What do you have against madness?

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Why you hate salad but love vegemite.

  • Brett L||

    You're antipodean?

  • Pro Libertate||

    I know what that means, but it always makes me think of people who oppose feet for some reason.

  • ||

    Because the Aussies us the metric system?

  • Pro Libertate||

    Maybe. I really don't know.

  • Generic Stranger||

    What if I hate both?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Tonight and tomorrow Reason’s 24/7 feed will be focused in reporting election updates.

    Well, maybe you should instead focus on keeping your website stable. On the most important day of the century I wasn't able to express my thoughts.

  • ||

    I don't think we should let this issue slide. I think we should harp on it relentlessly for days. I also think we should blame someone, say, Tuccille maybe?

  • rho||

    SquirrelCloud.com clearly isn't all it's cracked up to be.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    It's whoever put that "you might like" box up there. It's cursed. I warned them that it was cursed.

  • nicole||

    I'm going straight to the top and blaming Obama.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Was everyone else going to a blank page at reason.com/comments/post when trying to comment for a long portion of the afternoon?

  • Zeb||

    I guess so. I was.

  • Ted S.||

    I'm glad I'm not the only one who was having trouble posting around 1400 EST.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    I am not excited about today's Champions League results, nor am I too unhappy.
    No spoiler.

  • Ted S.||

    Dortmund got a draw in Madrid. Good for the 5-year coefficient.

  • Fluffy||

    Regardless of who wins or loses, let's all agree to aggressively push the meme that "(OUR GUY) lost because of that damn Gary Johnson!"

    It's no fun unless libertarians are being blamed. For whatever.

  • Randian||

    I'm so in on this.

  • LTC(ret) John||

    Agreed! Then we can draw ire for years.

  • Pro Libertate||

    I'm in.

  • Cytotoxic||

    Hell yeah. The only thing better than salty ham tears are angry salty ham tears.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    If it's Johnson's fault, the losing party might actually make a small effort to get libertarian votes next time!

  • Brett L||

    Guess who's willing to Nuke the Millenium Falcon?

    I want to see him play a broken alcoholic Han who Leia's left, wandering the galaxy with a recently deceased Chewbacca -- who he's had taxidermied -- in the co-pilot's seat trying to get to the next spaceport bar where someone will buy him a nights worth of cheap booze for being a once great Hero of the Republic.

    "You an' me Schewie. There was a time when we were free and didn't answer to nobody. An' now. An' now. It's jus' like the Empire never ended. Gotta ask permission to dock. Gotta ask permission to leave. Gotta get permission to take a piss. And then they wanna test you to make sure you ain't drinkin and flyin. Well lemme tell you somethin'! No, I'm makin a point here, Schewie. Don't interrup' me. I fly better piss-drunk than any other pilot on the Kessel run does dead sober, an' you an' Leia both know it. Schtupid princesses. Shoulda known better than to marry someone whose first name is Princess."

  • ||

    I'd go see it. Your version, that is.

  • Ska||

    I read the drunk Han, but I pictured Jim Lahey in the cockpit of Lone Star's Winnebago delivering the scene.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    With Randy as Chewbacca?

  • ||

    It's "Barf" you heathen.

  • ||

    Technically, "Barfolomew." Idiot.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Yes, a shirtless Randy makes me want to barf.

  • Zeb||

    now when I re read that I picture it exactly that way.

  • ||

    Han sits in a bar and is approached by a bounty hunter from the old days, Han shoots him without provocation, drinks his shot, and leaves.

  • Brett L||

    "You're no Boba Fett. Shit, Greedo was tougher than you."

  • Cytotoxic||

    +1 to this and the above comment.

  • ||

    That's brilliant! Someone should make that.

    I HATE GEORGE LUCAS.

  • tarran||

    MEanwhile, a hard Leia, running an increasingly totalitarian New Republic, orders a crackdown on tarrif runners in an attempt to shore up the New Republics coffers.

    The crackdown includes attacking tariff runners, boarding them, confiscating their cargos and punishing their crews. The Millenium Falcon is one of the ships targeted.

  • ||

    Also, if Ford is unable to reprise the role I say Mel Gibson is cast as alcoholic Han.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Set it further in the future and you could cast Clint Eastwood as Han.

  • Cytotoxic||

    Is Han supposed to hate Jews?

  • ||

    Wasn't Greedo a Jewish name?

  • Restoras||

    I see what you did there...

  • tarran||

    Luke is fat and running a cult centered around a watered down version of the Jedi training. His weakness for girls, food and feckless adventure distracts him from the machiavellian plotting of his assistant who handles the day to day operation of the New Jedi Council.

  • tarran||

    Leia has a daughter from her time with Han. The daughter is estranged from Leia after discovring that Leia had lied as to why Han had been kicked off-world and sets off on a journey to search for her father.

    When she discovers her father, she has wandered into a violent situation over her head, and Han saves her, but in the process becomes a wanted man.

    They are forced to flee together, while she copes with his numerous flaws and he grapples with his desire to evade responsibility and his desire to be a dad.

  • rho||

    Sons of Alderaan 90210.

    Would not watch.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Lando and the Hutts are pulling the strings of the New Republic government out of a run-down bordello. It's discovered that Jar Jar has lived the last 40 years as an S&M sex slave in the deepest, foulest area of Coruscant.

  • Brett L||

    We should really do a group slashfic on this.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    *Lights the Sugarfree signal*

  • The Hammer||

    That's your answer to everything!

  • ||

    I want to see him play a broken alcoholic Han who Leia's left, wandering the galaxy with a recently deceased Chewbacca

    I see you've read the expanded universe.

  • Brett L||

    Eh. I quit after the first Kevin J. Anderson book. Which was nice, because I didn't have to read his stuff with Brian Herbert and be disappointed. So I guess I just read the Zahn books and about half of the next one.

  • ||

    I took it pretty far, but got tired by the time I was finishing the Yuuzhan Vong (spelling? can't remember) series. There were some good ones in there (Thrawn trilogy and Han Solo trilogy) but it mostly came down to individual authors. The collective works required too much consistency and cohesion that a lot of the authors didn't have.

  • Trespassers W||

    I think you spelled it correctly. NERD.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Lando warned him.

    "They're prisons! Man-made space prisons. You're doing time! You get up in the morning, she's there. You go to sleep at night, she's there. It's like you gotta ask permission to use the bathroom. [pleading voice] 'Is it all right if I use the space bathroom now?'"

  • Pro Libertate||

    Right now, there is a nonzero probability that the next Star Wars movie will be directed by Werner Herzog.

  • Ska||

    Little Dieter makes a cameo as a random starship pilot, and the Aguira Wrath of God guy is... well, I'm guessing he's dead. Just seems like that type of dude doesn't live long.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Kinski is dead, but there are other options for Herzog.

    Luke's undying pain was almost orgasmically pleasing to Yoda.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Surveillance video suggested he didn’t live in the district where he was running.

    Disenfranchisement drones!

  • Rich||

    In excluding Martin from the ballots, Bare cited video evidence showing Martin consistently spending the night at another house.

    WTF. Obama and Romney consistently spend the night away from "home", too.

  • Zeb||

    Good point. And how many senators spend almost all of their time away from "home"? Seems like you ought to have some firmer evidence before invalidadting him on election day.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Woman ordered to wear ‘idiot’ sign for driving on sidewalk to pass school bus.

    A Cleveland judge has decided a fine and a 30-day licence suspension weren’t harsh enough penalties for 32-year-old Shena Hardin, who was caught on camera driving on the sidewalk to avoid having to stop for a school bus that was letting off children.
  • Matrix||

    Probably not harsh enough, but I'm fine with public shaming this woman.

  • BigT||

    Candidates came to Cleveland to see the idiot! (And to buy my vote.)

    If there was any doubt that the US presidential fight hinges on Ohio, an awkward campaign airplane traffic jam at the Cleveland airport made it clear today.

    Minutes after Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney touched down on the tarmac, Vice President Joe Biden swooped in on Air Force Two for an unannounced - but what the White House said was long-planned - visit.

    Mr Biden's move seemed aimed at dampening the challenger's 11th hour visit to the battleground state.

    Mr Romney, who was waiting for running mate Paul Ryan to land, stayed onboard his plane until Mr Biden boarded his motorcade and left the tarmac, which became even more crowded when Mr Ryan's plane landed minutes later.

    Only president Barack Obama, who is spending the day in Chicago, was missing from the dance of the jets.

    http://www.irishtimes.com/news.....ing60.html

  • Ted S.||

    Didn't we discuss this in the Mourning Lynx?

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    I don't recognize the morning links

  • ||

    Chrysler gives its workers the day off to vote, no doubt for their benefacator Barack Obama.

  • Rich||

    I believe you meant "defecater".

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Canada's best restroom

  • Brett L||

    Ummm... so who isn't here today?

    A Pennsylvania man was arrested yesterday after flashing his breast implants at fellow Walmart shoppers.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    Shriek has been noticeably silent.

  • Bobarian||

    Brett got here late and tried to blame the squirlz.

  • Brett L||

    See... the problem here is that... my little brother, this morning, got his arm caught in the microwave, and uh... my grandmother dropped acid and she freaked out, and hijacked a school bus full of... penguins, so it's kind of a family crisis...

  • Rich||

    Owens banged his head against the vehicle’s window, apparently cutting himself in the process. Which then allowed Owens (seen at right) to allegedly spit blood at officers.

    Clever boy!

  • Brett L||

    Gee, he seemed like such a normal, well-adjusted young man before that. People of Walmart...

  • LTC(ret) John||

    Warty?!

  • Randian||

    They can't charge him with indecent exposure because he's a man.

    Even though the breasts probably looked similar to a woman's.

    Sheesh.

  • Rich||

    He got off on a testicality.

  • Cytotoxic||

    I cannot pinch my nose hard enough.

  • ||

    From the first PM link, sub B:

    Lines of up to four hours were plaguing Central Florida voters who wanted to cast a ballot for either President Barack Obama or his opponent, former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney.

    Fuck you, Orlando Sentinel. I went in there and pulled the trigger (i.e. bubbled the sheet) for Gary Johnson, and I wrote NOTA for all elections that only had a Republican or Democrat running, and I wrote "fuck you" for the Supervisor of Elections since he did such a shitty job today.

  • ||

    Oh and I wrote myself in for Clerk of Courts because she was running unopposed and A) I don't think that's a position that should be up for election or subjected to partisan politics; and 2) I hate our Clerk of Courts system. I work two blocks away from the courthouse and it still takes my entire lunch hour to pay a speeding ticket.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

  • Eduard van Haalen||

    Should I even mention the Justin Bieber Singing Toothbrush?

    http://www.amazon.com/Brush-Bu.....B005CWS2C4

  • The Other Kevin||

    Someone gave me one of those as a gag gift last Christmas. The toothbrush, not the doll.

  • Randian||

    yeah right.

  • Bobarian||

    The doll was not a gag.

  • Enough About Palin||

    In Soviet Union, doll gags YOU!

  • Anonymous Coward||

    How about some election counterprogramming? Go play Halo 4 instead.

    John-117 2012!

    He's your best chance for survival.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Unfortunately he doesn't meet the requirement of being 35.

  • ||

    World's rarest whale spotted off the coast of New Zealand.

  • LTC(ret) John||

    Japanese research vessels have been dispatched. In a related development, Tokyo chefs are eagerly anticipating a rare new seafood shipment.

  • ||

    pics or it didn't happen

  • LTC(ret) John||

    Putin fired somebody for "corruption"?! WTF? If that was a real reason, he would have sucked the end of a DsHK long ago.

  • ||

    I think that guy who tried to run against Putin like 10 years ago is in jail for corruption.

    In Russia corruption is what you go to jail for when you threaten to stop corruption.

  • DJF||

    Russia is such a primitive country, in the US corruption at the Pentagon gets you a job at a defense contractor and a Medal of Freedom.

  • ||

    He's a kinder, kuddlier Vladimir these days.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    European Union auditors have found the member nations are wasting billions of euros...

    Stan Marsh: Mom, dad? How come there's suddenly no money?
    Randy Marsh: I'll tell you what happened, son. See, there's a bunch of idiots out there who weren't happy with what they had. They wanted a bigger house and materialistic things that they didn't even need. People with no money, who got loans to buy frivolous things they had no business buying...
    [Walks over to margarita machine and starts filling it with ice cubes]
    Randy Marsh: ...and these assholes just blindly started buying any stupid thing that looked appealing 'cause they thought money was endless...
    [Margarita machine muffles Randy's voice as he continues to talk]
    [Pans back to a blank stare from Stan as the margarita machine continues to blend over Randy's voice, then back to Randy as he puts the machine on high]

    Randy Marsh: ...even less money coming in. And the idiots couldn't see that by doing all this frivolous spending, they were mocking the economy! And they made the economy very angry. We're all feeling the economy's vengeance because of materialistic heathens who did stupid things with their money. Do you understand, son?
    Stan Marsh: Yeah, I think I get it.

  • ||

    What the hell is the deal with featured articles. No I do not 9 Photo-taking tips to help amateurs.

  • Ted S.||

    Anonbot seems to have taken over Generic Brand's account.

  • ||

    Wow. I never thought about it like that.

  • Matrix||

    Hail to the Chief!!

    Waiting on UPS to deliver my copy of Halo 4

  • RyanXXX||

    NERDRANT: Am i the only one who's weirded out by the direction the story has taken?

    -The whole human-elite alliance has been flushed down the memory hole, it seems, and the Covenant is back in force. Continuing the saga is one thing, doing it by making the previous 3 games seem irrelevant is bad
    -Humans and forerunners coexisted as rivals? The first three games contained numerous hints that the forerunners actually WERE humans (only humans can activate the halos, the robot monitor all but says YOU ARE FORERUNNER, etc.)

    It just seems like they are retconning the established lore. That said, the personal story of Cortana and Chief in Halo 4 seems pretty damn good

  • T||

    I'm reading the Forerunner books as they slowly arrive. I think they might answer some questions.

  • RyanXXX||

    They have already answered questions, but the answers are just weird (human-forerunner war is just one example), and they have raised a million others (PRECURSORS?!?!!)

  • Cytotoxic||

    Are any of those Halo books any good? Before you ask yes I am a nerd.

  • Cytotoxic||

    I got the impression that the elites you fight in H4 see are just a small zealous faction of theelites and other races. Like if the Covenant were Mormans, these are Fundamentalist LDS Mormons.

    I'm also kind of trepidatious about the story direction. More worried about COD gameplay infiltration. I wish the story were more about the old insurrectionist forces coming back. Maybe that's what the rest of this trilogy will run on who knows.

  • RyanXXX||

    Yea, throwing in some human enemies could be interesting, though it risks making it seem like it's no longer Halo.

    Fair enough about the "faction" of covenant you fight in H4, but from what I've read that's not really touched on. Reviews from fans have said that it seems like the Arbiter's faction lost, and the elites are now all baddies again, but they may be missing the nuance

  • The Hammer||

    Am I the only one who just wants new settings in which to shoot aliens?

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

  • ||

    Who the fuck is Sienna Miller?

  • Randian||

    Good question.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    You are uncultured boors.

  • Randian||

    Name one thing worth seeing she has been in.

  • Trespassers W||

    FACT PWNED

  • Slithery D||

    That TV show with that guy in that city. The American cop thing in London.

  • The Last American Hero||

    Keen Eddie

  • ||

    Your mom?

  • Brett L||

    For Warty, hot little weightlifter sets total weight record for 113lbs.

  • Randian||

    You must have linked to the wrong video. I saw no hotness.

  • Brett L||

    You haven't seen the 200+lb category entrants.

  • ||

    Cutie. Her husband Max is a notably awesome dude, too.

  • Slithery D||

    Which one is Dunphy?

  • Enough About Palin||

    The gay one.

    NTTAWWT

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Guess Who Said It?

    This race has been particularly difficult, because the ugly racism that still haunts this country and compels the voting choices of a majority of white people was particularly aggressive this time around. I’d say it was worse in 2008, because last time, I think conservatives simply found it implausible that Obama could win, polls aside. Now that they have proof that Americans will vote for a black President, their rage has spun out of control.
  • ||

    Well the conclusion is already in the premise, and its Raw Story, so I'm going with Marcotte.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Well done. I award you with the Amanda Marcotte-approved Anal Sex Toy of Death.

    http://web.archive.org/web/201.....970c-320wi

    Use responsibly!

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

  • LTC(ret) John||

    T O N Y?

  • T o n y||

    Hi there. Sorry, I've been busy wrangling black panther intimidation squads and voting multiple times today.

  • Restoras||

    Fuck off, sock.

  • ||

    This is an excellent example of Begging the Question.

  • Randian||

    No serious conservative pundit thought McCain stood a chance, so whoever wrote this is quite likely mentally deficient.

  • Zeezrom||

    Janeane Garofalo?

  • Loki||

    Shreiking Idiot?

  • ||

    In what could be his chance to do so, Team Obama amps up the cult of personality on Facebook.

  • ||

    Facebook has been utterly insufferable today even without that shit. I'm very close to hiding a lot of people.

  • Red Rocks Rockin||

    You guys must have more vocal friends than I do. Even with all the electioneering in the real world, I've barely seen anything the last few weeks outside of my marxist professor buddy. Normally, I'd take that as a bellwether that FB is on the verge of entering MySpace irrelevance, because I'm linked to a lot of opinionated muhfuggas.

    Either people are carrying on their lives as normal (I hope) or people don't want to watch their FB friends list rapidly shrink. The 20-year reunion we have coming up in a couple years should be REALLY interesting.

  • Restoras||

    I've unsubscribed to a lot of people this cycle.

  • nicole||

    First I unsubscribed, then I just completely stopped watching FB. Still unsubscribing from people on Twitter, though. Someone this morning was super psyched not only to have voted for Obama but also for Warren, and I almost threw up in my mouth.

    Pew has done some studies on this. Liberals are significantly more likely than "independents" or conservatives (self-described) to unfriend or unsubscribe from someone based on political posts. They are also more likely to say they were surprised to find out their friends had different political beliefs from them. Mwahaha.

  • Shmurphy||

    There's a guy standing out in front of the polling location I went to holding a sign that said "HIRE OBAMA". I'm going to go out there after work with a sign of my own that says "REPEAL THE STAMP ACT".

  • Red Rocks Rockin||

    "HIRE OBAMA"

    "You may have hated his first term, but wait until you go through the second!"

  • Loki||

    How close is he to the polling place? In most states there are laws banning active campaigning within x number of feet of a polling location. You might be able to have him arrested. I did that to both a Kerry and a Bush-tard in '04.

    Actually the only the Kerry schmuck got himself arrested by being a total shitheel about it when informed that he was breaking the law. The Bush guy said "Oh really? Sorry about that" and moved away to the legal distance without incident.

  • Shmurphy||

    I didn't have a tape measure on me. If I had my way he'd be right next to the booth so people could see just how dumb Obamaphiles are.

  • Zeb||

    The Bush guy liked the idea of "free speech zones".

  • Killazontherun||

    I was really disappointed when I realized it was a sap story about him climbing stairs instead of the side of the building.

    Man climbs Chicago skyscraper with bionic leg

    http://news.yahoo.com/man-clim.....nance.html

  • Rich||

    [insert obligatory joke about skyscraper with bionic leg]

  • Killazontherun||

    Hardly a triumph of the human spirit when the machine is doing all the work.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Okay, who doesn't have the theme from The Six-Million Dollar Man going in their head?

  • JW||

    NOW I do.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Be the Lee Majors you want in the world.

  • ||

    Humans made the machine.

  • Killazontherun||

    That's a triumph of the human will not spirit, totally different.

  • Enough About Palin||

    "Hardly a triumph of the human spirit when the machine is doing all the work."

    Those stairs? You didn't climb them.

  • Killazontherun||

    I do that everyday without the assistance of machines. What makes him so special? He's cheating like Cartman in the Special Olympics.

  • ||

    a story that reads like a Russian soap opera.

    Fat middle aged women talking while they defeather chickens about the botulism that killed the town's Boss?

  • Cliché Bandit||

    wow, you really need to get to Moscow.

    And for the record, there are no middle aged Russian women. There are young hotties, LOTS of them, and babushkas. There is no in-between. At some magical point they spontaneously become platok wearing babushkas selling flowers in the subway.

  • ||

    Very true, CB. Very true. However, the point is not magical, mere genetic. What we don't know is when to predict the expression. 35 is an excellent rule of thumb.

  • ||

    35 is an excellent rule of thumb.

    And in Russia 35 is middle aged.

    I am vindicated.

  • Cliché Bandit||

    I can personally attest that 35 is WAY to low. I know several mid 40s Russian women who are still smokin hot.

  • Omni||

    Not too impressed with Halo 4. Going back to play more Assassin's Creed 3. Far more patriotic on election day.

  • ||

    After work it will be all Borderlands for me.

  • Killazontherun||

    I finished a couple of DLCs fot the first. Good stuff, but still disappointed that you can't sneak up on shit in the game. Pop a little fucker and the rest of his midget clan shows up. I like sniping! No, I love sniping!

  • ||

    Well, you can get the jump on them with a Phasewalk but then they'll swarm you. And the Sirens Phaselock in 2, no more Phasewalking. But Phaselock has its own advantages.

    In 2 my current playing style has developed into a heavy sniping habit, or at least cleaning up the lesser assholes, and then going in, Phaselocking the badasses, bosses, and tougher enemies, and burning them down with an elemental SMG.

  • Shmurphy||

    Commando. Longbow turret destroys your face, all arguments to the contrary are wrong.

  • R C Dean||

    B2 for me, too.

    Still working the Pirate's Booty. Really, the writing and voice acting for B2 is absolutely first-rate.

    Quibble: Goddam, but I get tired of having to start way back at the beginning of an area every time I start to play.

  • ||

    Yeah, I'm doing the pirate DLC right now too. Good loot and a good way to pump up my Siren before getting back to the main storyline. I just wish I had more time to play.

  • ||

    A Mohawk that fights the British during the revolutionary war???
    The whole plot seems far too wrong in some weird French way for me to play that game.

  • Brett L||

    Fuckit. I want me a tommyhawk to kill people with.

  • ||

    I am thinking about getting Dishonored...pretty sure you can kill people in just about any fashion you can imagine in that game.

  • Brett L||

    Sure, sure. But the tomahawk is gonna be my weapon of choice IRL when the drugs and the booze and Eli Manning's inconsistent play finally drive me to spree killing. So I kinda like the idea of practicing in the video game.

  • Killazontherun||

    When you get one for realz, could you test a theory of mine that you can make it come back to you by tying two perpendicular tomahawks to it?

  • Killazontherun||

    boomerangs, I mean, shit the idea has me too exited to think about it straight.

  • Brett L||

    Sure

  • ||

    But the tomahawk is gonna be my weapon of choice IRL

    Here you go:

    http://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/med.....891414.jpg

  • Cytotoxic||

    AC3 looks stale and ugly.

  • Eduard van Haalen||

    Three cases in the same North Carolina precinct in which voters come in to vote, only to discover someone already voted in their name. NC doesn't have Voter ID.

    http://pjmedia.com/tatler/2012.....-precinct/

  • Pro Libertate||

    In any other context--any other context--the lack of an ID is a flag for possible fraud.

  • BigT||

    So, in a matter of 3 1/2 hours at as relatively slow precinct, we had three different cases of pretty obvious voter fraud. As if it needed to be pointed out to those silly Democrats who claim that voter ID laws disenfranchise poor or minority voters, all three of these victims of fraud were black voters.

  • Loki||

    B-B-But, voter fraud is just a silly right wing meme! /derp

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    Yup. Enjoy your national ID, sucker.

  • Enough About Palin||

    "So, in a matter of 3 1/2 hours at as relatively slow precinct, we had three different cases of pretty obvious voter fraud. As if it needed to be pointed out to those silly Democrats who claim that voter ID laws disenfranchise poor or minority voters, all three of these victims of fraud were black voters."

  • MJGreen||

    Obviously this was done by Republicans, to make us believe this kind of voter fraud was a real issue.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Well, it had to be Republicans, because only Republicans ever in the history of humanity have done anything racist.

  • Lord Humungus||

    I voted - #818. Lines weren't exactly snaking out of the building, but turnout, according to one of the poll workers, was over 50%.

    Imagine my surprise for the number of Libertarian candidates.

    Also a decrim marijuana proposal just for the City of Grand Rapids.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    12 Races Where Ladies Could Win Tonight

    Kyrsten Sinema is an unmarried, openly bisexual, openly not religious, proudly pro-choice, openly pro-LGBT state legislator running for the US House. Let that sink in for a second. Openly bisexual. Openly nontheist. OPENLY PRO LGBT. NOT MARRIED! She's the opposite of Michele Bachmann.

    And they say feminists don't care about the real issues in America.

    Warren is a painfully intelligent Harvard professor with a huge crush on the middle class and a rich guy bullshit detector at a level never before seen in the Senate's recent history

    AUGH IT BURNS IT BURNS

  • Pro Libertate||

    Warren is painful, yes.

  • tarran||

    I have a hunch that she's going to implode spectacularly 5 years after she gets to the Senate in some corruption scandal.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Is it looking like she'll win?

  • ||

    In the election over "FREE STUFF" v. "FREE DUMB", she has it in the bag.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Brown seems rather inoffensive from a Democratic perspective. A rational one, if there were such a thing.

    Then again, so does Romney.

    I find it truly disturbing that people are willing to ignore everything and vote for the Obamas and Warrens of the world. It's really sad.

  • Pro Libertate||

    This holds true for GOP candidates, too, but supporting Obama and Warren seems like a new level of irrational.

  • Zeb||

    A lot of people seem to have really convinced themselves that Romney is some sort of conservative monster. It is very odd.

  • AuH2O||

    Jezebel is clearly a Patriarchy false flag operation intended to convince people that Women's Suffrage was a mistake

  • Killazontherun||

    Von Mises question Nate Silver's methodology.

    http://www.economicpolicyjourn.....-dont.html

  • Killazontherun||

    The sentence had too many 's' so I dropped the least necessary one.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    A message from the Queen of England

  • Pro Libertate||

    Yo, fuck that. The one option that's worse than the one we have is the UK government.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Listen, if the British really think they can tell us what to do, I say: let them try.

  • Generic Stranger||

    Dear Useless Figurehead:

    Consider this.

    You're move.

    - America.

  • Generic Stranger||

    My kingdom for an edit button.

  • Killazontherun||

    Did she get the e-mail from Abdullah bin Abdulaziz Al Saud that she's a little behind on the rent, and he's thinking about making Buckingham Palace his summer home? This is going to be a little awkward.

  • T o n y||

    Mugs? Doesn't she mean beakers? Something smells wrong here.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    I have to say, I'm on board with items number 8, 9, 12, and 15.

  • ||

    HM you ignorant slut. #9 is actually the worst. American craft brews are some of the best beer in the world, and people who still think American beer is a punchline must be drinking mass-produced pisswater swill like in the olden times.

    South African beer, for the record, is utter shite.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    Craft brews, yes...but in general?

  • The Hammer||

    Coors is delicious.

  • Enough About Palin||

    "Reporter: DC poll workers given photo of 'the real Eric Holder'"

    In other words a photo ID to prevent voter fraud?

    http://dailycaller.com/#ixzz2BUBLhlf9

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