Putting the "Pig" in Pigskin

Matt Welch | March 26, 2009

So, what's the Senate Judiciary Subcommittee on Antitrust, Competition Policy and Consumer Rights up to these days? Maybe looking into the competition-distorting consequences of throwing, I dunno, $170 billion-plus at a single insurance company? The are-you-kidding-me antitrust prosecution of Whole Foods for trying to buy the Wild Oats chain? The rights of consumers to buy stuff from Mexico at the cheapest possible price, instead of paying premiums to support the Obama administration's symbolic sops to Big Labor? Nope!

After Congress gets through tackling the economy — assuming it tackles the economy — it will turn its attention to really important matters: college football's Bowl Championship Series. [...]

The BCS "leaves nearly half of all the teams in college football at a competitive disadvantage when it comes to qualifying for the millions of dollars paid out every year," the committee said in a statement. Sen. Orrin Hatch (R-Utah) also will introduce legislation "to rectify this situation."

Sadly, this is not the first or even second time Congress has expended energy on the BC fucking S. Back in 2003, Orrin Hatch (talk about a "situation" that needs to be rectified!), blew this mighty wind at the onset of another hearing.

Many of you may not be aware that when I was in high school, I had a promising future in football. But things didn't work out. BYU already had a half-back, and I couldn't seem to go to my left. Well, some things never change. I still don't go to the left.

But on a serious note, I am pleased that the Judiciary Committee is examining the competitive effects of the BCS because the notion of basic fairness is called into question by the current BCS system. I believe there is value to ensuring fairness in our society whenever we can. And while life may not be fair, the moment that we stop caring that it isn't, we chip away at the American dream.

And the moment Congress takes its nose out of the nation's jockstraps, we may begin to chip away at the daily embarrassment of being represented by the World's Greatest Deliberative Body.

Comments

Alan Vanneman|3.26.09 @ 1:33PM|#

Let's give Orrin the Heisman or we're never going to hear the end of this.

Kyle Jordan|3.26.09 @ 1:35PM|#

"We must move forward, not backward, upward not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom!"

The Government os the United States of America has sunk to the level of the Kodos quote above. And they will continue to descend past this mark!

I'm not saying this sarcastically or in any joking manner. I really think we're fucked. Or that we've been fucked and it's just now really coming to the forefront.

"The public sucks! Fuck hope!"

|3.26.09 @ 1:35PM|#

Oh, for the love of God. Now, I like Congress wasting time, but I don't like it interfering in something that's clearly beyond its purview.

As we unite to oppose the current government, the one central theme to our opposition should be one thing and one thing only: restoring the idea--no, the practice--of limited government.

|3.26.09 @ 1:36PM|#

the notion of basic fairness is called into question by the current BCS system. I believe there is value to ensuring fairness in our society whenever we can. And while life may not be fair, the moment that we stop caring that it isn't, we chip away at the American dream.

Fookin hell!

A triple, and I haven't even had breakfast.

Kyle Jordan|3.26.09 @ 1:36PM|#

*of instead of os

|3.26.09 @ 1:38PM|#

So, how many different private institutions have to be directly fucked with before everyone just says "we've had enough?"

Reinmoose|3.26.09 @ 1:40PM|#

Can't we just give congress more vacation time?

|3.26.09 @ 1:48PM|#

College football should never go to a playoff format. It is much better off without one. One of the unique features of college footbal is that there is no playoff system.

I am sick and tired of the comparison to basketball's "March Maddness." I love hoops almost as much as I love football. However, is it just me or is the whole march maddness thing overrated? If one associates march madness with upsets and the college basketball davids besting its goliaths, as I suspect most fans do, then it is definitely way overplayed.

Look, the high water mark of the madness was 26 years ago when NC State beat the phi slamma jamma boys and we saw Jimmy V. running and looking to hug his players. NC State was an 8 seed-the lowest seeded team ever to win the tournament. How many times has a 16 seed beat a 1? Zero. How about a 15 seed beating a 2 seed? I think no more than 2 or three times.

Of course, if I was having dinner with Dicky V., I wouldn't go there.

|3.26.09 @ 1:55PM|#

"I don't like it interfering in something that's clearly beyond its purview."

Interstate Commerce Clause!!!

Kid Blast|3.26.09 @ 2:07PM|#

"World's Greatest Deliberative Body."\

I think you meant World's Greatest Debilitating Body.

JB|3.26.09 @ 2:08PM|#

Congress is retarded.

I can't wait until the rage they deserve is directed at them.

Kid Blast|3.26.09 @ 2:10PM|#

:However, is it just me or is the whole march maddness thing overrated?"

The women's tourney is my absolute favorite time of the year.

|3.26.09 @ 2:12PM|#

Yes, LibertyMike, I'm pretty sure it's just you. March Madness is fun. Brackets are fun. Upsets are fun. The college football championships could be, but are not, fun.

ed|3.26.09 @ 2:13PM|#

while life may not be fair, the moment that we stop caring that it isn't,
we chip away at the American dream

And while the earth may not be flat, the moment we stop worrying about falling off the edge of it, we chip away at the nation's retards.

|3.26.09 @ 2:13PM|#

...the high water mark of the madness was /2/6/ 32 years ago when /N/C/ /S/t/a/t/e/ the Marquette Warriors beat the /p/h/i/ /s/l/a/m/m/a/ /j/a/m/m/a/ /b/o/y/s/ tar outa the Tar Heels...

FTFY.

Kevin

Reinmoose|3.26.09 @ 2:18PM|#

The women's tourney is my absolute favorite time of the year.

Really? Womens basketball?

The Sony Ericsson Open (Tennis) is on FSN (I don't get cable, dammit) all this and next week. I suggest you give that a try instead.

Kyle Jordan|3.26.09 @ 2:21PM|#

I don't know Nick. Boise State buttfucking Oklahoma on national TV was pretty damn fun to me.

Xeones|3.26.09 @ 2:21PM|#

Shut the fuck up, Orrin Hatch.

kinnath|3.26.09 @ 2:28PM|#

Be sure to wave to the Italians as we go screaming by on our way into legislative oblivion.

|3.26.09 @ 2:28PM|#

All things considered, it is vastly preferable to have congress discussing college football rather than things like:

- Massively increasing the budget
- Quasi constitutional 90% retro-active taxes
- Takeover/Destruction of whole US industries - Payday loans, Student Loans, Etc...

I mean the worst thing that happens is you piss off some College's alumni.

Kid Blast|3.26.09 @ 2:32PM|#

"Really? Womens basketball?"

Oh yes! I know it's hip to downplay the women's game, but if you've followed the game as long as I have, it's really a treat to watch.

|3.26.09 @ 2:35PM|#

This is just too embarrassing.

Americans are just too fucking stupid for self government.

BakedPenguin|3.26.09 @ 2:38PM|#

Wow. I'd be glad these morons are wasting their time on this crap, but I expect them to come up with a "solution" that winds up costing around a few hundred billion dollars.

|3.26.09 @ 2:41PM|#

Kyle, I agree with you, which is why I would like to see that undefeated Boise State get an opportunity to play against the next team after buttfucking Oklahoma rather than just going back to Idaho. They might as well have beaten OU in a regular season game. No one that beats everyone they play (unless on probation which is another topic for another day) should be excluded when they play in the same league.

Still isn't Congress's business, though.

|3.26.09 @ 2:49PM|#

Still isn't Congress's business, though. - Nick

Sad to say, anytime the Feds grant as much tax money as they do to the institutions, public or private, that these teams represent, Congress can damn well make anything they do its business. Case in point: SCOTUS' 1984 Grove City College v. Bell decision.

Kevin

Xeones|3.26.09 @ 2:50PM|#

All things considered, it is vastly preferable to have congress discussing college football rather than things like: etc.

I don't know. Instead of discussing all those things, they're just DOING them. That's really kind of the opposite of an improvement.

Zeb|3.26.09 @ 2:51PM|#

I find it really funny that people talk about this as if College football matters. It doesn't. It doesn't make any fucking difference who wins, how the winner is decided or whether it was fair.

creech|3.26.09 @ 2:55PM|#

Oh for the days when, say, Penn would just go up into the coal fields and recruit a few miners to play against the swells from Yale.
I know - let's have Congress mandate that Ohio State and other power-houses can only field nine men in any year following a Top 10 finish under BCS rules.

|3.26.09 @ 3:08PM|#

It's not about a playoff, it's not about a number one vs. number two game.

It's about anit-trust violations. It's about the money, collusion, restriction of trade and telling a Duke, Vanderbilt, Louisville, Uconn etc.. that they are entitled to 2 million dollars a year because they are in a BCS conference.

And 56 other D-1 schools are left without the guaranteed money every year. They must earn their way in, while an 0 and 12 Duke gets a check no matter what.

You people are just idiots. It's about the distribution of money. Only Major League baseball is exempt from anti-trust. Nobody else is.

This is long over due. Don't be fooled with the sidebar arguments. It's about uneven distribution of money and the creation of a two tier second class status within Division 1 football.

Kolohe|3.26.09 @ 3:15PM|#

Only Major League baseball is exempt from anti-trust. Nobody else is.

When the USFL successfully sued the NFL for anti-trust, the award iirc was literally 3 bucks. (actually 3 silver dollars, iirc).

Anti-trust has de facto not applied to sports leagues for a long time if ever.

|3.26.09 @ 3:19PM|#

You people are just idiots. It's about the distribution of money. Only Major League baseball is exempt from anti-trust. Nobody else is.

This is long over due. Don't be fooled with the sidebar arguments. It's about uneven distribution of money and the creation of a two tier second class status within Division 1 football.

Does the BCS hinder any school or conference from having a bowl game or championship series?
No.
Where is the restraint of trade then?
There isn't any.
Then WTF is congress doing?
Granstanding to keep their names in the part of the paper that's readership has a high gullibility quotient.

Fuckin' dumbass.

T|3.26.09 @ 3:24PM|#

This is long over due. Don't be fooled with the sidebar arguments. It's about uneven distribution of money and the creation of a two tier second class status within Division 1 football.

Creation? There's been a two-tier system as long as I've been paying attention, and probably longer. Something like 10 1A schools run a profit on their athletic programs. The rest operate at a $4M/yr average loss. Do you honestly think changing the money distribution from the bowl games is going to change that? Is splitting up the money further going to make, I dunno, Cincinnati competitive with Texas or Ohio State? Get real. It's about schools trying to jockey for a slice of money that they can't bring in themselves.

|3.26.09 @ 3:28PM|#

If my Crimson Tide had just taken care of business and stomped those fucking Utes we wouldn't be witnessing this foolishness.

ev|3.26.09 @ 3:33PM|#

P Brooks: careful with those triples. I hear John Bonham (aka The Shit) had 4 quad vodkas with breakfast (and a ham sandwich) the day he died.

J sub D: Which of the founding fathers thought that the public was too dumb to vote? I know there were several but I can't remember.

aja rizona: What's fucking overdue? I think bowl games are stupid too, but even if it is about distribution of money, how the fuck can you validate the government interfering in sports? Not just a private enterprise (well, MLB, NFL etc are), but also an entity/institution that has no effect on anybody, save debts with bookies and broken hearts?

For the record, I can't fucking wait for baseball. All other sports, although I love/played hockey, are bullshit in comparison. 16 football games? Give me a real sample size bitch.

And I know heartbreak. I'm a cubs fan.

Fluffy|3.26.09 @ 3:33PM|#

Aja rizona, you're even more stupid than your post makes it appear if you think a single person reading your post here has any respect for the antitrust statutes whatsoever.

I think the funny thing about this story is that it exposes a sad truth: that the only thing that produces more absurdity than a member of Congress trying to pander to his idiotic constituency is a member of Congress who stops pandering long enough to busy himself in something in which he has a legitimate interest.

Think of all the taxpayer dollars wasted and all the time wasted because Orrin Hatch and Arlen Specter are angry about who wins football games or are pouting because meaningless home run records were broken.

Paul|3.26.09 @ 3:45PM|#

Open letter to Orrin Hatch:

Fuck college football.

Sincerely,

Paul

|3.26.09 @ 4:05PM|#

Yeah, yeah Orrin, Utah's great. Ya think they'd have even competed with Alabama if Alabama hadn't dropped a certain shot at the national title? How many times has a team sucked in its bowl game after blowing their shot at the end of the season? Meh.

Besides, even with a playoff, Florida would've won.

duster|3.26.09 @ 6:36PM|#

Yes, Mr. hatch is always who I think of when it comes to being fair.