Greedy Companies Cause Global Warming

Not News: A senator blames a large corporation for global warming. News: It's Sen. James Inhofe (R-Okla.) and he's blaming the Weather Channel.

Via Gristmill

Editor's Note: We invite comments and request that they be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of Reason.com or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason at any time. Report abuses.

  • ||

    "What'll happen to the WeatherChannel's ratings when people aren't scared anymore?"

    Well, they can still show the "After the Disaster" specials on the WeatherChannel.

    OT: Suppose we asked the same thing about "The Eternal Word of Truth" channel. Hmmmm...

  • ||

    And Darwin conceived the theory of evolution as a way to boost the ratings of the Discovery Channel, which he cleverly anticipated would come into existence around this time.

  • ||

    global warming hype
    they scare us to raise money
    love my gas guzzler

  • Truth||

    Basically, 99.7% of the "Greenhouse effect" is NATURAL!!!
    http://www.geocraft.com/WVFossils/greenhouse_data.html

  • ||

    nice haiku

  • ||

    I thought haikus wer 3-5-3 not 5-7-5.

  • ||

    NIck M.,

    No. You're thinking of Buddy Ryan's Chicago Bears (ca. 1984) defensive alignment scheme.

  • Tom||

    I hate liberals
    Trashing Capitalism
    and wearing Che shirts

  • ||

    I thought people only watched the weather channel to be scared by the snow forecasts, and maybe the occasion tornado documentary.

  • Buddy Ryan||

    Wasn't that a 4-5 alignment (more specifically, a 4-5-2 alignment)? I forget.

  • ||

    Yeah. Global warming seems a little slow to make the weather channel exciting for the MTV generation.

  • Bhh||

    I thought it was common knowledge that the Weather Channel controls the weather to boost its ratings. Open your eyes people.

  • jimmydageek||

    I only watch the weather channel for their repeated play of "Twister"...

  • ||

    Well, you know... Buddy Ryan originally wanted to have a 10-1 alignment. But then he was informed that Mike Ditka would be coaching from the sidelines and couldn't serve as the 1.

  • ||

    MikeP,

    Were those eleven tiny Ditkas?

  • jimmydageek||

    The Weather Channel
    Plays "Twister" repeatedly.
    Weather Channel Rocks!

  • ||

    What'll happen to the WeatherChannel's ratings when people aren't scared anymore?

    Scared of what? The coming of the apocalypse, or having their festival rained out? Somehow I just don't see TWC getting much of a boost from the former. The latter is still going to tune in, global warming or no.

    Then again, I never understood how TWC got paid for anyway. The only time I ever left it on during commercials was when they had some guy about to get blown away by a hurricane.

    Great drama unfolding as the sky gets dark, the rain starts, the wind picks up, and eventually the poor bastard has his arms wrapped around a street lamp while cows are flying past. All for my entertainment! Even then, the all-news networks started putting their own poor bastards on the scene, and I flipped over on the breaks.

    These days I use these here innerweb tubes for my weather prognostication.

  • ||

    Tasty weather girls
    Meterologists are hot
    When they wear glasses

  • ||

    I've said a lot of terrible things about the Weather Channel but I cannot believe that even that locus of Evil would be melting all those glaciers just for ratings.

    Do you all think there might be a religious component in all this? That the Christian fundamentalist view of a 6000-year-old unchanging Earth is threatened by the sight of receding snow cops on mountains?

  • ||

    The weather honeys
    Pale by comparison to
    Reason Pillow Girl

  • ||

    Japanese haiku are 3-5-3. It gets expanded to 5-7-5 for Western languages because we have so much less mileage out of a syllable than they do.

  • ||

    Something about Inhofe claiming the The Weather Channel is pimping a false crisis to boost their ratings while on Fox News, strikes me as too precious for words.

  • ||

    Not News: A senator blames a large corporation for global warming. News: It's Sen. James Inhofe (R-Okla.) and he's blaming the Weather Channel.

    To be fair, he is blaming a large corporation for global warming hype.

    I still don't think global warming hype will make people tune into TWC. But I do find it amusing that the second stupidest class of policy motivators in the world interviews the first stupidest class as experts.

  • ||

    NotThatDavid,

    Is the German haiku pattern 17-23-17?

  • thoreau||

    Katherine, you've got the format all wrong. Let me show you how to do this:

    Not news: Politician blaming large corporation for global warming.
    News: It's Sen. James Inhofe.
    Fark.com: He's blaming the Weather Channel.

  • ||

    NotThatDavid has
    His head up his ass, So says
    Wikipedia

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haiku

  • ||

    the weather channel
    is only slightly less wrong
    than Lou Dobbs Tonight

  • ||

    Is the German haiku pattern 17-23-17?

    No, that's how you audible from a running play to a pass.

  • ||

    I blame Easterbrook's
    crappy football column for
    misleading me, then.

  • ||

    I won't be able
    to stop talking like this for
    the rest of the day

  • ||

    Thank God it's Friday
    Must take break from Hit and Run
    God Damn, Haiku's suck!

  • Guy Montag||

    Tasty weather girls
    Meterologists are hot
    When they wear glasses


    After meeting Katherine I wondered why she stopped modeling to do this. She would be a hot weatherwoman too!

    Now, everybody stop picking on the Weather Channel. I need to sell Carbon Credits!

    Oh, Katherine, you ought to see my hybrid. It has the coolest sound system. Goes all the way to 11!

  • vm||

    "Haiku's suck"

    what about the Haiku's suck? "Haiku's suck is orange"? the suck of haiku. the wrath of kahn. like that?

    /kicks self

    fun one for warren :)

    drag balls over glass
    but not on weather channel
    drag over glacier

    [keed keed]

  • ||

    "Big" Weather Channel...
    more retarded excuses
    from Hummer humpers.

  • Guy Montag||

    vm,

    I think drag racing is a carbon negative sport.

  • VM||

    Guy: cool! :)

  • jimmydageek||

    VM...yes, the haiku's suck is orange...or, the haiku's suck is greater, if only marginally, than that of VM...:)

    gd spell check thingy...;)

  • ||

    Well, I'm grateful for Global Warming, unlike some. I get to use that big box AC behind my house for something other than to put a cooler of beer on when I cut the grass. I didn't bust my butt for 50 years to suffer when the temps get to warm for my comfort. Bring it on!!! Turn that big AC down to about 65. I don't care who/what the cause is.

  • ||

    Global warming is a vast Jim Cantori conspiracy to increase the number of hurricanes. You know that guy has a few women in every town on the East and Gulf coasts.

  • VM||

    JDG:

    lol!

    agreed about marginal propensity to suck :)

  • ||

    what the hell is this
    you guys are way off topic
    stick with weather crap

  • ||

    the suck of haiku
    is such an abstract topic
    not good for reason

  • ||

    I'll beleive what the weather channel says about the future effects of global warming when they can get a 5 day forecast right

  • ||

    sage has gotten stuck
    all his comments are haikus
    bad end for the week

  • ed||

    Here's a model to contemplate: warmer weather = expanded growing seasons = more photosynthesis = more carbon dioxide-eating vegetation = less CO2 in the atmosphere. Of course, we'll need more tractors to cut down all the vegetation, and many of us will fart after we eat it. So what will happen? Nobody knows. Am I worried? No. At least not about the heat.
    All that farting, however...

  • jimmydageek||

    Hurricane coming
    Weather Channel says to leave
    Shilling for big oil

  • ||

    sickness is spreading
    i could do this all day long
    somebody help me!

  • ||

    don't you understand?
    there is no global warming
    where is ron bailey?

  • ||

    Clueless right winger
    Knows not science from his ass
    Evolution is fact too

  • violent_k||

    I cannot help you
    The disease has gone too far
    I suggest we drink

  • Guy Montag||

    I'll beleive what the weather channel says about the future effects of global warming when they can get a 5 day forecast right

    Man, now you did it! We are going to be flooded by 'climatology' worshipers telling us how it is 'different' and comparing it to meterology is just 'dim'. Why? Because they say so!


    ed,

    Here's a model to contemplate: warmer weather = expanded growing seasons = more photosynthesis = more carbon dioxide-eating vegetation = less CO2 in the atmosphere. Of course, we'll need more tractors to cut down all the vegetation, and many of us will fart after we eat it. So what will happen? Nobody knows. Am I worried? No. At least not about the heat.
    All that farting, however...


    This is my favorite global warming model. (work safe) Of course, the AWG people are great in filling in Step Two :)

  • ||

    silly 'mericans
    all your base belong to us
    as does ron bailey

  • ed||

    Okay, I give in.
    Haiku has captured me too.
    I will die, I hope.

  • ||

    who is guy montag?
    what do people think of him?
    obnoxious blowhard

  • ||

    Guy montag no fun.
    Spoils fun of haiku posters
    with non haiku rant.

  • MadTom||

    "Haiku's suck"

    No apostrophe.
    Plural is "haiku"; no S.
    Where's my grammar gun?

  • ||

    i am sorry, guy
    like shooting fish in barrels
    such easy targets

  • ||

    thank you, dear mad tom
    for pointing out my errors
    give us dumb folk break

  • ||

    Haiku abuses
    flom Gaijin telitoly
    food not dericious

  • ||

    Shocked, I am, so shocked
    Past Ron-Bailey-esque "mistakes"
    Continue to ring

  • ||

    set aside one day
    comment in only haiku
    let's say march sixteenth

  • ||

    Global disaster!
    Yet you talk football, weather babes?
    Focus, guys, focus!

    ... on weather babes, sure!
    (I pleasured myself to an
    Incoming cold front)

  • VM||

    yea Stevo is back
    Master of teh Intertubes
    His wit knows no bounds

  • ||

    Thank you, Mister Moose
    And for alerting me to
    This here haiku fest

    set aside one day
    comment in only haiku
    let's say march sixteenth


    Good thought, highnumber
    -- and eat green sushi for a
    Nice St. Haiku's Day!

  • STEPHEN THE GOLDBERGER||

    For all that I know
    The Super Bowl Shuffle crew
    caused Global Warming

  • ||

    avoid green sushi
    unless it's the wasabi
    (really horseradish)

  • violent_k||

    I think Guy has left
    did not enjoy the haiku's
    should we follow him?

  • ||

    Global warming seems a little slow to make the weather channel exciting for the MTV generation.

    Strangely, I'm pretty sure the Weather Channel has more music these days than MTV...

  • VM||

    violent k, look!
    no apostrophe plural
    read what MadTom wrote!

  • ||

    Superbowl Shuffle
    sequestered carbon by
    going to landfill

  • violent_k||

    Hit post with much haste
    before reading all comments
    I need a damn life

  • VM||

    Not at all VK
    follow haiku-number's lead
    have good Friday Fun!

  • ||

    I haven't written a haiku since sixth grade, and I'm not going to write one now. You guys keep it up, though; I'm busting a gut! (ROTFLMFAO)

  • ||

    OK, haiku fans, let's cut to the Weather Channel chase:

    Stephanie Abrams
    Kristina Abernathy
    Sharon Resultan

  • ||

    Mad Mike is genius
    or watches too much tv
    either way, good job

  • ||

    Whoops... I miscounted, big time:

    Clueless right winger
    Knows not science from his ass
    Darwin was right too

  • ||

    Jeanetta Jones...WOW!
    When she says "Raaaaaaaa-in" with that drawl,
    South rises agin'

  • ||

    Bunnies Don't Haiku

  • Armed and Hammered||

    What'll happen to (insert government agency here) when people aren't scared anymore?

  • apollos||

    Not all Greens are red, but it's not just the color-blind that have trouble telling the difference. Check out http://www.4globalwarming.com

  • ||

    cannot haiku,
    all of you, hear me!
    without zen

    the real bill
    wants to haiku, with-
    out haiku-ing

    hn, he wants
    to fart, without farting
    bloat bloat bloat

    genghis kahn he
    on road and miss whole
    party so sorry

  • gucci wallet||

    wow, cool, yep this is a great site. I enjoy.

  • louis vuitton for sale||

    I haven't written a haiku since sixth grade

GET REASON MAGAZINE

Get Reason's print or digital edition before it’s posted online

  • Progressive Puritans: From e-cigs to sex classifieds, the once transgressive left wants to criminalize fun.
  • Port Authoritarians: Chris Christie’s Bridgegate scandal
  • The Menace of Secret Government: Obama’s proposed intelligence reforms don’t safeguard civil liberties

SUBSCRIBE

advertisement