DOA PDBs

What else did the President know?

Tim Cavanaugh | April 15, 2004

Last week's revelation of a President's Daily Brief (PDB) from August 6, 2001—which unambiguously warned that Osama bin Laden was determined to strike inside the United States and was possibly planning to hijack airplanes—has launched an explosive controversy over how much warning the government had of the 9/11 attacks and whether the Bush administration was negligent in its response to the terrorist threat.

It now appears, however, that the August 6 PDB was just the tip of the iceberg. Revelations by White House insiders indicates America will be subjected to a flood of PDBs in the weeks to come. Among the most damaging revelations:

"That's My Bush" Possibly Advocating Government Overthrow

April 3, 2001

Comedy Central non-hit ridicules POTUS, reveals Oval Office procedures, breaches first family's operational secrecy. Creators Parker and Stone claim their seditious show is a "laff-riot."

That's My Bush's pilot episode revealed identity of the White House "wacky neighbor" Larry, according to TV critic *********.

AG Ashcroft and FCC head Powell are conducting more than 20 ongoing investigations for possible sailor talk. We have not been able to verify any of these reports, as no actual viewers of this program have been located in the U.S.

Fallout From Hainan Island Incident Will Top Foreign Policy Agenda Through '02

April 9, 2001

Imprisonment of Navy air crew by PRC underscores need for missile defense system, says David Brooks.

It is clear that the historic significance of the Hainan standoff is beyond human calculation. If the American hostages are safely returned, President Bush's place in history is assured. If not, the Gore In '04 campaign can be expected to score political points in a most unsavory manner.

AG Ashcroft is investigating allegations of lewd behavior by the deceased daredevil Chinese pilot.

AG Vows to Take War On Indecency Right to Porno Caves

August 7, 2001

In response to increasing warnings of threats against domestic targets in the United States, AG Ashcroft has redoubled the Justice Department's commitment to fighting pornography.