Nancy Pelosi Defends Drone Policy, Rand Paul Worried About Drone Policy Supporters, Chicago Names Mexican Drug Lord “Public Enemy Number One,” Unions Exempt From Anti-Stalking Laws in Some States: P.M. Links

  • enemigo público número unoPuente Grande JailNancy Pelosi rejected the idea that Democrats are less critical of Barack Obama’s drone polices than they would have been had George Bush had the same policy. Pelosi explained she wasn’t sure if the public should be informed when American citizens are targeted, saying “it just depends” and “we’re in a different world.” Rand Paul, meanwhile, called support for the president’s targeted killings policy “very scary and worrisome.”
  • Rand Paul may bebetter positioned than Marco Rubio to run for president in 2016.
  • Chicago’s named its first “public enemy number one” since the gangster Al Capone, a Mexican drug lord named Joaquin Guzman who’s holed up in the mountains of western Mexico. But let’s keep talking about “gun violence” not the drug war.
  • The AP reports it found a letter from a high ranking officer of Al-Qaeda detailing the terrorist network’s strategy to conquer Mali, including compromising on its religious extremism to acquire allies it acknowledges it needs in the region.
  • The Knight Foundation says it regrets paying disgraced former New Yorker writer Jonah Lehrer $20,000 for a speaking engagement that included a public apology and talk about his plagiarism.
  • Cops in southern Illinois mistook a maple syrup operation for a meth lab, while in Oklahoma police found a mini-meth lab on a golf course.
  • Unions are exempt from anti-stalking laws in at least four states, California, Pennsylvania, Illinois and Nevada. Happy Valentine’s Day! 

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  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Rand Paul may be better positioned than Marco Rubio to run for president in 2016.

    Because he better pre-hydrates.

  • Tim||

    I think the water thing is just the first shot in a media campaign to make Rubio synonmous with moron.

  • ||

    Rubio is a moron, but not because he over-hydrates. Maybe I'm accidentally restating what you already said, but the water thing is just another form of ad hominem attack. Go after him for his small government rhetoric but his insistence that Medicare and Social Security continue as is.

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    He knows to not piss off the biggest GOP demographic.

    His speech was awful though.

  • Don Mynack||

    At least he didn't fart like Tip O'Neil.

  • Certified Public Asskicker||

    I mean, what kind of rube, drinks water??

  • Sudden||

    He would've been drinking soda were it not for Bloomberg's courageous work in killing that scourge.

  • Certified Public Asskicker||

    Now that would have been worth the effort the media has gone through to cover this, if instead he had chugged a liter of coke and then belched.

  • hotsy totsy||

    I'd like to see him sitting with a cup of ...something, like Jackie Gleason, and every once in awhile, take a gulp and say..."mmmmmm BOY!!"

  • CE||

    Or chewing tobacco and spitting in the cup. That would be priceless.

  • T||

    Fish fuck in it, right?

  • CE||

    I don't always drink water, but when I do, it's during a major televised speech.

  • Azathoth!!||

    Water? You mean like from the toilet?

  • CE||

    Can't conservatives just call liberals racist if they criticize Rubio for anything though? Liberals did it for Obama.

  • IceTrey||

    Because Rubio isn't a natural born Citizen because his parents weren't US citizens when he was born.

  • ||

    ---because his parents weren't US citizens when he was born.---

    I don't normally cite wikipedia but it says he was born in Miami. His parents citizenship is irrelevant in this case.

    Anchor Baby.

  • IceTrey||

    Anchor babies are naturalized at birth. Rubio is a naturalized citizen not a natural born one.

  • John||

    http://nalert.blogspot.com/201.....minal.html

    Cornel West calls Obama a war criminal. I guess somebody won't be getting any more invitations to appear on MSNBC.

  • Rich||

    But he's still "a prominent member of the Democratic Socialists of America", right?

  • John||

    Of course. You will see more and more of this. Leftists will say mean things about Obama to make themselves feel better when they vote straight D in every foreseeable election.

  • wareagle||

    does anyone pay attention to West even if he calls a Repub a war criminal?

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    I flipped by CSPAN recently and saw a panel with West, Michael Moore, Newt Gingrich and various other unsavory types on it. They were calling each other "brother". The bullshit was knee deep.

  • Tim||

    Deep as a carnival cruise?

  • Enough About Palin||

    Not even Plato or Jefferson were that deep.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Woman marries the man who killed her twin sister

  • mr simple||

    "I want to start a family with Victor because I love him. He is innocent," the bride said before the ceremony.

    Sounds like she knows something.

  • Ted S.||

    Not quite the same, but Dead Ringer is a hoot.

  • Zeb||

    What, no one ever gets wrongly convicted?

    Also, this was news like two months ago.

  • ||

    Clones are expendable.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Elisha Cuthbert is named Maxim magazine’s most beautiful woman on TV

  • John||

    I really like Melissa Rauch. But I am a sucker for a short girl with a big rack.

  • BakedPenguin||

    I generally agree with this, but why wouldn't you go with Sofia Vergara?

  • John||

    I just like Rauch. Vergara is attractive. But Rauch is adorable. I also like women with soft features and good skin, which Rauch has.

  • ||

    Picking only one woman is so...limited. Why stop there?

  • CE||

    My wife insists on it.

  • ||

    Shouldn't someone actually be on TV to be named the most beautiful woman on TV? She was on 24, what, 9 years ago?

  • playa manhattan||

    She's been on Happy Endings for a while now.

  • ||

    Never heard of the show, but I am familiar with the concept. If she's involved with that I say "Nice touch".

  • Enough About Palin||

  • JW||

    She never did anything for me either. Plain, jane blonde. Yawn.

  • Zombie Jimbo||

    Still works for me.

  • MJGreen||

    Pfft, that's even better.

  • Brandon||

    Rand Paul is better equipped than Marco Rubio to run for president in 2016. Because he's not a SoCon dipshit.

  • SIV||

    That would be news to all the SoCons in KY who voted him in the Senate. Rand is a "no abortion in cases of rape and incest" SoCon.

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    He'll move to the center in a national election after reading some opinion polls.

  • wareagle||

    you mean like Obama 'evolved' on gay marriage?

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    Yes, they all pander and whore for votes.

    "Jesus is my favorite philosopher" was the lowest moment in pandering history.

  • John||

    No shreek. They are all lying assholes like you are. The difference is you are functionally retarded with a very low IQ and they just have low IQs.

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    I knew a Bush quote would send you scrambling to defend him by diversion.

  • Sheriff of Fistingham||

    Sooo...you're admit that without G.W. Bush (to harp on about), your life would be meaningless? His eventual passing will kinda invalidate your entire existence....that's pretty sad. I guess that as long as he lives, you will still feel relevant. Tragic....

  • Sevo||

    Actually no.
    Shreek still wants to screw his dad.

  • Calidissident||

    Abortion is far from the only SoCon issue. Though I do agree that Rand is relatively socially conservative for a libertarian-leaning individual

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    Rand has done a good job of not being as whacky as his father (see the newsletters and the Fed quackery).

  • Calidissident||

    Rand Paul has definitely expressed opposition to the Fed. Not as much as his dad, but he has made it an issue at times (and there's nothing quacky about being skeptical of a small group TOP.MEN having so much influence over a nation's financial system and economy)

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    Skepticism if great.

    But saying FOMC decisions should be performed by Congress is insane.

    He should brush up on the Fed before launching some dumbass quotes like Rick W. Perry did.

  • Calidissident||

    When has Ron Paul ever said Congress should conduct FOMC decisions? Do you know anything about the nature of his views on central banking?

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    No, he is he an ignorant goldbug too?

  • Calidissident||

    "He is he an ignorant goldbug?" Huh?

    Why are you asking that anyways? You compared Rand Paul's views on the Fed to his father's. I pointed out that while he hasn't emphasized it as much as his dad, he has been vocally critical and opposed to it. You responded with a line about FOMC decisions being performed by Congress as insane. Was that supposed to be about Perry? If so, why? The discussion was about the Pauls

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    Ron Paul says nutty things like that the Fed was behind Watergate and Saddam Hussein. And he said this during House testimony.

    If Rand goes off the deep end the business community will support a rational Democrat.

    Do I know if Rand has said such? No.

  • Calidissident||

    And I ask again, what does that have to do with supporting FOMC decisions being made by Congress?

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    The Dog with the Human face

  • ||

    Where did you get childhood pictures of Warty?!?

  • ||

    Lolz

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    KILL IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    WHAT THE FUCK IS IT???!?!?!?!?!?

    KILLLLLL ITTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Nancy Pelosi rejected the idea that Democrats are less critical of Barack Obama’s drone polices than they would have been had George Bush had the same policy.

    Are you serious?

  • Tim||

    Crone defends drone.

  • Tonio||

    Honorable mention.

  • JW||

    We have to kill them to know what's in the drone program.

  • Tonio||

    Good one, Fist. I just hope I live to see her out of office, desperately trying to cling to celebrity on the local talk show circuit where she'll be routinely mocked for that comment.

  • mr simple||

    She can do a show with John McEnroe.

  • John||

    http://www.volokh.com/2013/02/.....tball-gun/

    Guy mounts paintball gun on home drone.

  • brlfq||

    Then drone-paints all the neighborhood's brown people.

  • Enough About Palin||

    WTF is wrong with you? Why are you so fucking obsessed with "brown people"? Jesus fucking Christ.

  • Sheriff of Fistingham||

    Just stick to the fucking narrative, man...For christsake!

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Cops raid home after man posts picture of toy weapon

  • Rich||

    After inspecting the model mortar, the rather embarrassed team of officers apologised and took their leave after shooting his toy Alsatian dog.

    /Captain Obvious

  • $park¥||

    Suck it plebes.

    Farbstein says this violated security protocols by bypassing the TSA checkpoint. She says that prompted TSA officials to conduct the private screening.

    The rapper and reality TV star were eventually cleared to board their flight, which departed after about a 50-minute delay.

  • John||

    I really hate celebrities more than I hate politicians. And I really hate politicians.

  • R C Dean||

    And a special circle of hell awaits, I fervently pray, for celebiticians.

  • ||

    John, Kim K is a short girl with a big rack. Come on! You can't show us the love and then take it back like that!

  • John||

    Is she short? I always thought she was kind of an amazon with giant rack and dump truck sized ass to boot.

  • ||

    She is 5'2", just like yours truly.

  • John||

    Okay. So maybe it is that Rauch is a cute blond with glasses and a great rack. Kim K is just too trashy for me. I don't get why people like her so much.

  • Pro Libertate||

    She's cute enough, for a whore. Not like that Fluke chick.

  • ||

    Honestly, it's less that she's trashy and more that she's a prude bitch. Kourtney is the fun, slutty one, even if she does have two kids.

  • John||

    Wow Nicole. You have apparently watched that show. I never have. So Kim is a bitch and a prude? Wow. I had no idea. The bitch part is to be expected. But prude?

  • Pro Libertate||

    A prudish whore. She only lets you tape her fucking if you buy her a nice present first and treat her like a lady. LIKE A LADY!

  • ||

    Yes, we watch the show. Kim is a huge prude. She's like the prissiest person on TV, and incredibly rude to her fam and stuff. Her other two (full-)sisters are much more sexually open and silly and she is always like WAYYYY too good for that.

    I have to say, if you're into reality TV at all, the show is surprisingly good. It is a bunch of real family-style drama.

  • Pro Libertate||

    I think reality television is a pestilence sent down upon us by an angry God. Not that nice one from the New Testament, either.

  • Sudden||

    I think reality television is a pestilence sent down upon us by an angry God. Not that nice one from the New Testament, either.

    UR BLAMING TEH JOOOOZZZZZ!!!1!11!!1!!!!

  • Pro Libertate||

    Only their god.

  • Zeb||

    People like her? I thought it was just a trainwreck sort of thing. But I'm still wondering who the fuck she is, so what do I know?

  • ||

    Three inches shorter and we could have nicknamed you "Sub Five".

  • ||

    Eyes of Blue?

  • Ted S.||

    Do you have a big rack too?

    (This is why there are no female libertarians....)

  • ||

    I don't think that's the next line to the song.

  • ||

    Let's just say sarcasmic would hate it.

  • John||

    +100 Nicole.

  • wareagle||

    her sister is the amazon. And i am ashamed to know that.

  • C. Anacreon||

    What's the deal with the dump-truck sized ass being "in" anyway? Yesterday they had some woman on TV who had a botched surgery to put implants in her cheeks to make her ass bigger. Huh??

    Now, when your wife says "honey, does this outfit make my rear end look big?" are you supposed to say yes?

  • John||

    There is nothing wrong with curves. But giant asses are a no go.

  • BakedPenguin||

    Okay, I think you just answered a question I asked you above.

  • ||

    I like a woman with an ass that resembles a canvas sack full of golf balls.

  • Ted S.||

  • Zeb||

    As I understand it, many black gentlemen go for the big old ass.

    Why do contemporary white Americans mostly like skinny asses, but big tits? They are both secondary sexual characteristics, I don't think either makes particularly much more sense than the other. It is interesting how what is considered sexy changes over time, though. You'd think it would be more hard wired.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Not uncommon among Hispanic men, either, if my Cuban friends are a good sample. They had more of a fattie tolerance, too.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    There's a big difference between a woman with a big ass and a big-ass woman. Unfortunately, this is a difference many don't appreciate.

    For what it's worth, I like big tits and a big ass.

    Which is why, of course, my wife is a 4'6" 85 lbs. Asian stick woman.

  • ||

    Which is why, of course, my wife is a 4'6" 85 lbs. Asian stick woman.

    I always wondered about the degree to which this would be true. Ah, the ways of the heart.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    Have you tasted my wife's massaman curry? It's to die for!

  • Pro Libertate||

    You know, I just had that for the first time. No idea how I missed it all these years, as I love Thai. It's tasty.

  • Calidissident||

    I agree with HM. As long as a girl isn't fat, I like it if she has a big butt. And I know white guys are stereotyped as not liking it, but honestly I have met very few if any white guys (I'm white myself and most of the people I've grown up around are) do as well, again, as long as the girl isn't fat. Maybe it's because I'm younger (I'm about to turn 20) or maybe it's regional (I'm from California). I don't know, but I've always found that stereotype puzzling because it's not true at all in my experience

  • Calidissident||

    *it should say "who don't like it" instead of "do as well" after the last parenthesis

  • C. Anacreon||

    Personally, I prefer a skinny ass and firm/sensitive rather than large breasts, but I do believe I am in the minority. But you are right that it should be more hard-wired. I saw the anthropologist who wrote "The Naked Ape" speak when I was in college. He was convinced the reason that men like cleavage is that it subconsciously makes them think of ass crack, and gets their brains motivated to do some mounting.

  • ||

    I prefer well-developed glutes; I cannot prevaricate upon this point. The assemblage of HampersandR commenters are unable to counter that when a female enters with a reduced midesection and a nonangular posterior is presented to you, you develop penile tumescence.

  • ||

    (damn Ted beat me to it. Too long to think and type)

  • BakedPenguin||

    Even the Caucasian gentlemen must vociferate!

  • brlfq||

    John, wouldn't it be quicker and easier to just list the people you don't hate?

  • Rich||

    after an airline employee allowed them to bypass a security checkpoint

    I hope that employee enjoys the protection his autographs provide it in prison.

    Ha ha.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

  • Brandon||

    O’Connor...is accused of transferring $2 million from the foundation beginning in September 2008 and March 2009. She never repaid the money.

    Under terms of O’Connor’s deferred prosecution, she has to undergo psychiatric treatment for gambling addiction, obey all laws and try to pay back the money

    It's good to be the King a wealthy Democrat in California.

  • Tonio||

    I wonder if she'll find a psychiatrist who'll overbill her and then give her a cash kickback.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    ...while in Oklahoma police found a mini-meth lab on a golf course.

    It's a fair way to make a living, any cop having a stroke over this is just being a putz.

  • ||

    I'll give you a mulligan on this one.

  • $park¥||

    That's pretty rough, he's obviously a bit green.

  • wareagle||

    fair way to make a living.

  • JW||

    It's Oklahoma; par for the course.

  • C. Anacreon||

    Slice!

  • ||

    Who doesn't appreciate a pun?
    I'll tell you: the enemies of fun.
    If they want more than wordplay
    Maybe they shouldn't be so gay
    And appreciate Fist, not shun.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    That's exactly what I keep saying.

  • ||

    Puns are the Stephen Baldwins of the joke world.

  • ||

    Awesome?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    I'm going to hazard a guess that you've fallen into the trap of being a anti-pun leader, bored with it all.

  • ||

    My handicap's too low. It's not even fun any more.

  • Zeb||

    Puns are OK, but better one at a time.

  • Tim||

    Join the club.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

  • ||

    Samcro4312

    My mate craig makes the same noise as the second goat everytime he shoots his load.

    I had to close my office door, I'm weeping I'm laughing so hard.

  • Ted S.||

  • ||

    GOATS! was better.

  • $park¥||

    GUNS!!! Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme...

    Here’s part of the Democratic proposal in Missouri:

    4. Any person who, prior to the effective date of this law, was legally in possession of an assault weapon or large capacity magazine shall have ninety days from such effective date to do any of the following without being subject to prosecution:

    (1) Remove the assault weapon or large capacity magazine from the state of Missouri;

    (2) Render the assault weapon permanently inoperable; or

    (3) Surrender the assault weapon or large capacity magazine to the appropriate law enforcement agency for destruction, subject to specific agency regulations.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Or they'll be shot by an assault weapon wielded by the appropriate law enforcement agency.

  • John||

    I guess they want to make Missouri a one party R state. What a bunch of fucking retards.

  • From the Tundra||

    They are clearly retarded. Similar shit going on here. From an email I received this morning from a local 2A group:

    "Representative Alice Hausman (DFL - Roseville), the author of the "assault weapon" and magazine ban bills, was not even in the room to present "her" bills to the committee. She left it to a gun control lobbyist, paid by out-of-state foundation funds, to pitch the proposals. Even the Star Tribune took note of this highly irregular activity.

    Hausman later admitted to a reporter from the liberal web site MinnPost.com that she "doesn't really know anything about guns" and "just sorta signed up."

    WTF?

  • John||

    Top men.

  • Tim||

    See you in 2014

  • R C Dean||

    What is the likelihood that will pass?

    It, like a lot of these bans, sets up a very interesting (regulatory) takings case.

    Certainly (3) is a taking, flat out, not even regulatory. And (2) strikes me as a pretty clear regulatory taking.

    I wonder if SCOTUS would rule that option (1) saves it from being a taking.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Depends. Do you mean the SCOTUS now, or the one after Obama gets one or two more justices on?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    If they had made Cash for Clunkers mandatory, how much better the world would be right now.

  • Pro Libertate||

    They could, you know. Thanks to Justice Roberts.

  • Killazontherun||

    What an oaf he turned out to be.

  • Pro Libertate||

    The whole country is begging him to kill the law, conservatives and libertarians are praying for limits on the Commerce Clause, and he comes up with infinite tax power solves all problems!

  • CE||

    I have a fourth option...

  • Pro Libertate||

    I'm eagerly awaiting the incredible about-face when this unlimited killing authority falls into the hands of a Republican.

  • ||

    The hospitals will be flooded with cases of whiplash.

  • Tim||

    Thing is, because nobody challenged Obama the courts will be free to come down heavy on the repub guy.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Just before the Republican who takes supreme power has me executed as a known libertarian, I'll laugh when the lefties are rounded up first. Dumb asses.

  • JW||

    The streets will run green with patchouli oil.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    That will just be because we've had time to see the horrible effects. Right now we don't have that information yet.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Bullshit-based community.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Unions are exempt from anti-stalking laws in at least four states...

    Unions, like corporations, aren't people, so how can they be stalkers?

  • Zeb||

    What does that even mean? Are union members exempt? Or only if the whole union stalks collectively? Does the stalking have to be union related, or does it apply to creepy weirdo shit too?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    IT MEANS HE GETS RESULTS YOU STUPID CHIEF!

  • sloopyinca||

    Unions are exempt from anti-stalking laws in at least four states, California, Pennsylvania, Illinois and Nevada.

    You know who else is exempt from laws? Apparently, the Sarasota Police Department.

    FTA: In a written statement released Thursday, prosecutors announced there was no excessive force, a decision they based heavily on the opinions of two independent consultants they asked to review the case — an FDLE agent and a retired Sheriff's Office lieutenant.

    Yeah, I think they have a different definition of "independent" than the rest of us "civilians" have.

  • Ted S.||

    They were only following procedures.

  • Dr. Frankenstein||

    It is only those with the proper training and experience who are able to determine whether force is execessive or not. You wouldn't want some rube off the street trying to make that determination.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

  • Generic Stranger||

    And here I thought this video was satire.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    ...including compromising on its religious extremism to acquire allies it acknowledges it needs in the region.

    We'll see how much compromising it will do on its religion once it has the region.

  • sloopyinca||

    Justice moves slowly (when at all) in the Sunshine State. It took over three years to find this man guilty of battery and sentence him to probation. He inexplicably (ha!) avoided the use of a firearm in the commission of a felony enhancement as well as the brandishing and myriad other charges a human would face. But hey, he's got a family he's got to go home to.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    These are great. Navigation's tricky.

    YOU HAD ONE JOB

  • robc||

    Far too many of those made me laugh hysterically.

  • NeonCat||

    Scroll wheel down worked for me.

  • Raston Bot||

    black screen

  • John||

    http://www.laweekly.com/2013-0.....ns-permit/

    LA Sheriff shockingly gives gun permits to his cronies and few others.

  • Pro Libertate||

    I'm not sure I can tolerate a threat to my maple syrup supply. I can't abide that fake corn syrup crap.

  • ||

    Don't worry, a black market will spring up.

  • Pro Libertate||

    You're right. I feel much better. I think I'm going to have some waffles now.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    I can hook you guys up.

  • Pro Libertate||

    You think a maple syrup pipeline is doable?

  • Auric Demonocles||

    That's gonna be hard to do discretely. How do you make a pipeline that the cops can't find, and doesn't lead right back to the source? I think it might be better to do this in a underground railroad sort of scheme.

  • Pro Libertate||

    What, a giant subway is more discreet than a pipeline?

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Duh, it's underground. And we've already got a cover story for why it's there.

  • Pro Libertate||

    I was thinking below-ground pipeline, but I'm good so long as the maple flows.

  • Zombie Jimbo||

    Make sure no Tim Horton Canadian Maple donuts are involved. They'd be over the pipeline like, like, cops on donuts.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Just straight, unadulterated maple syrup, thanks.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    The syrup must flow.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Bless the Maker and all His Syrup. Bless the coming and going of Him, May His passing cleanse the world. May He keep the world for his people.

  • ||

    How much markup?

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Who is it for?

  • ||

    Your mo...my mom?

  • Auric Demonocles||

    My mom wouldn't need syrup. She's already got- I mean, my mom's not my supplier!

    For your mom? I think we can work out a cashless deal.

  • Ted S.||

    Always with the racist market.

  • sloopyinca||

    Judge finds that Bozeman, Montana police deliberately erased recordings of a call where they violently manhandled a man on a "welfare check". He said the erasure can be used as evidence on the plaintiff's behalf when it goes to civil trial. No officers have been charged with felony evidence tampering, perjury or any of the other myriad charges that would apply to one of us.

    Also, the ruling means that non-cops will likely be forced to pay a larger settlement due to their (unpunished) criminal activities.

  • sloopyinca||

  • CampingInYourPark||

    "Obama made no phone calls on night of Benghazi attack, White House says"

    http://www.washingtontimes.com.....-benghazi/

  • Pro Libertate||

    I just had this odd vision of Obama talking to a stuffed Osama bin Laden in his office. Weird. Wonder what brought that on?

  • ||

    That whole bottle of cough syrup you just drank?

  • Pro Libertate||

    Nah, that's standard this time of day.

  • Invisible Finger||

    watching Deadwood?

  • sloopyinca||

    As a matter of fact, he took the phone off the hook when it started to ring incessantly. A man's got to get his 8 hours in you know.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    A man's got to get his 8 hours in you know.

    And by "8 hours", you mean that when the phone rang, Michelle was straddling on top of him and knocked the phone off the nightstand with her paw. She then continued her nightly marital rape/animalistic rutting for another 4 hours.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    And with that image in your minds...

    Happy Valentine's Day, muthafuckaz!

  • ||

    That image, combined with her making the requisite wookie noises, will both haunt and arouse me for days.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

  • ||

    I enjoyed that way too much.

  • JW||

    SNU SNU.

  • John||

    They never called him. You have to understand Obama is a moron who is in completely in over his head. His staff knows this. They know he doesn't bring anything to the table and will more than likely fuck up anything he touches. So they don't call him unless they absolutely have to. Basically the cabinet and the White House staff are running the government right now.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Before all this happened, there had been leaks about him basically being bored silly by national security briefings and even blowing them off.

    Fuck this fucker.

  • John||

    And this is only four years in. How disengaged will he be a year or two from now? Lets hope there are not any actual threats out there. If there are, we are fucked. He won't be around to do anything about it.

  • ||

    Uh, wouldn't you rather have this asshole not making decisions? I know I would.

  • Pro Libertate||

    See, we lose either way, because his appointees are possibly the worst in history. Not U.S. history. The history of government.

  • ||

    In the Obama administration, shit rolls uphill!

  • Pro Libertate||

    If only they could tap that power as an energy source!

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    Let us know when he lies us into a worthless $1 trillion ground war that kills 4500 US soldiers.

  • ||

    He prefers to kill innocent noncombatants.

  • gaijin||

    Let us know when he lies us into a worthless $1 trillion ground war that kills 4500 US soldiers.

    so that's your benchmark for engaging outrage? Anything less is just insignificant?

  • tarran||

    So we are getting the Woodrow Wilson administration now.

    I want to retire in 25 years, and thanks to my divorce, I'm basically starting over. I... am... so... fucked.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Maybe you should annul the divorce. For investment purposes.

  • tarran||

    No. My ex is dangerous to anyone who is in a relationship with her. The stronger the connection, the greater the danger.

    Being broke and divorced is *much* safer than living with someone who sets other people up to take the fall for her felonies.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Consult your tax adviser. Not valid in all states. In California, this may be heresy.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Everything will smooth out by the end of his 3rd term

  • Pro Libertate||

    Maybe an attempted coup like that would wake this country up. We're more lethargic than Warty after a night of moose-raping.

  • Ted S.||

    Not even to order out for pizza?

  • ant1sthenes||

    Well, to be fair, it was 3am. Who the hell wants to get up at that time of night?

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Florida!
    …won’t enforce law that would require Canadians to have international permit to legally drive in state

    Under the rules introduced Jan. 1, all visitors with foreign licences were to have an international permit issued by their country of residence in addition to a valid licence from home in order to legally drive in Florida.
  • Pro Libertate||

    That's 'cause we're not total statist fucks down here. Only mostly statist.

  • sloopyinca||

    Yeah, that's because they're smart enough to realize America Jr. is a big part of their economy. Besides, without all the Canucks, there would be no reason for restaurants to stay open past 7:30 pm. It's a jobs program, really.

  • ||

    They're worried about Canadian drivers in a state that's wall to wall elderly?

  • Pro Libertate||

    It's actually much more complicated than that. First, the old people try to kill us. Then there are the Northeasterners, who drive like syphilitic monkeys. Then there are the drunk tourists and rednecks.

  • ||

    So it was you I blasted past when I was doing 95mph going from Daytona Beach to the Orlando airport a few years back?

  • Pro Libertate||

    Depends. Were you the one with the twin nuns in your car?

  • ||

    Those weren't really nuns.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Some sort of nun trainees then?

  • Agammamon||

    Sort of nun trannies, yes.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Ahhhhhhhhhhh.

  • ||

    ORLANDOOOOO!!! Fuck Lake Eola.

  • ||

    I'm from LA and I'm nervous about driving on the east coast. I was unaware that level of driver aggression was possible.

  • Pro Libertate||

    They have to commit vehicular homicide before getting a license. True story, you can look it up.

  • ||

    When I moved to Seattle I started flying into rages about how unaggressive they are here and became even more aggressive in response. GET THROUGH THE FUCKING LIGHT YOU FUCKS

    Of course, I used to live in NYC so that's sort of my benchmark.

  • ||

    I started flying into rages about how unaggressive they are here and became even more aggressive in response.

    REPRESENT!

  • ||

    When you meet other north-easterners and the subject comes up, we all start nodding and commiserating. And the one time I got into a mutually aggressive driving situation, the guys I was fucking with and who were fucking with me right back...had a Yankees sticker on their back window.

    I avoid I-5 like the plague.

  • ||

    I drove through Seattle with my dad (the source of my aggressive driving genes) and they kept honking at him for driving like an asshole (and for passing on the right)

  • ||

    People will just wait here. There can be a two lane avenue with someone turning left at the light, but who can't turn yet because of oncoming traffic, and there will be eight cars backed up behind that person, most of them not turning, and the right lane will be completely clear...and no one will pop out of the line and go past. It's fucking insane.

    And yes, I get honked at a lot for driving like an asshole too.

  • ||

    I had more than one college friend from Seattle tell me that they felt very safe with me driving on LA roads but that I was to NEVER drive in Washington. I think they were lying to me about feeling safe with me on LA roads, I don't feel safe driving with me on LA roads.

  • ||

    I don't get honked at, I'm the one doing all the honking.

    My poor Midwestern boyfriend thinks I'm mean and aggressive. But then he doesn't know how to drive, so ha!

  • ||

    You don't understand, nicole, you have to be very judicious with your honking here. It will often scare and startle the recipient of the honk and then they'll drive worse, such as slowing down even more or swerving.

    It is impossible for a north-easterner to understand unless you physically engage in it here. It's mind-boggling.

  • ||

    One of my high school friends was going to grad school downstate at Champaign-Urbana. He would come up to the city to visit once in a while and the first time, I hadn't seen him in years, and he basically grabbed me and was like, "You have no idea how it feels to finally see someone again who...moves fast. NO ONE UNDERSTANDS!"

  • ||

    That's exactly it. No one has any sense of urgency, no desire to not waste time on the road or in lines. It's sickening.

    I have a Hawaiian friend who feels the same way. When a Hawaiian thinks you aren't urgent enough, you have a problem.

  • ||

    "No sense of urgency" is like...well, I wouldn't call it a mantra. Is there an opposite of a mantra?

  • ||

    Muntra?

  • Zeb||

    So how do Floridians drive, then? Like syphilitic Lemurs?

  • Pro Libertate||

    No, we drive fine. That's because we're tested by the bad driving of the non-native assholes and old people.

  • Zeb||

    I think NH drivers are pretty good too. Massholes and Connecticunts are maniacs, Vermonters drive slow as fuck when in other states, but fast at home and Mainiacs seem to be slow everywhere. I'd say you are mostly right about the north east. I could do without driving into Boston or New York.

  • ||

    As long as those crazy Canucks understand that the left lane is for passing they can drive freely in this state. Now, old lady, GET OUT OF THE FUCKING LEFT LANE WHERE YOU'VE HAD YOUR TURN SIGNAL ON FOR THE LAST 9 MILES!!!

  • Pro Libertate||

    Ever seen an old person driving and texting? I have.

  • ||

    And that is the real reason why Florida is the scariest place in the universe.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Well, that and the pythons.

  • Rich||

    Hey, guys! Warty and SugarFree are going to be getting their questions answered by the President in just a couple of minutes!

  • Ghetto Slovak Goatherder||

    Wait, really?

  • Ghetto Slovak Goatherder||

    He just compared himself to Lincoln.

  • Pro Libertate||

    The guy on Fringe?

  • Generic Stranger||

    Well, he did violate civil liberties in pursuit of a war while also increasing the power of the federal government, so in a way he IS kind of like Lincoln...

  • sloopyinca||

    When keeping it real goes wrong: Trenton Police-style.

    I do like the ruling that he can't be compelled to produce evidence, though. As if several eyewitnesses and other physical evidence isn't enough to convict this asshole.

  • Killazontherun||

    Technique is a little scary, but she makes a great splurt face.

    http://cdn.wwtdd.com/wp-conten.....sutton.gif

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Cops in southern Illinois mistook a maple syrup operation for a meth lab

    My dad recently got into the show "Moonshiners", even to point of somehow acquiring some moonshine all the way from the South up in his basically-Canada farm (which is odd since he's always been against drinking anything more than 2 beers in a sitting). We ended up watching several episodes when I was home for Christmas, and it was basically all about hiding the steam and stills from the cops. I told my dad he should just start moonshining up in Vermont and do it in the spring and no one will guess it's not a sugarhouse.

  • sloopyinca||

    Wow. That had to be the most compelling story I've ever read. Thanks.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    I may have set my dad up to get busted for running a meth lab when its really a illegal still. Is that still a win for him?

  • sloopyinca||

    Any time you can convince a parent to break the law, it's a win.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

    Twenty-four-year-old Sophia is smart, pretty and has hopes and dreams of getting to grad school.

    And for $5 she will be your girlfriend.

  • sloopyinca||

    Soooooo, Nicole gives our daughter the middle name after some harlot that sells her sexuality on facebook?

    Thanks, nicole.

  • ||

    I gave Baby Reason WISDOM!

  • ||

    You wouldn't be that pissy if the price were higher.

  • sloopyinca||

    I cannot deny this.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    You know what else you can get for 5 bucks?

    That's right, 4 Bomb Pops!

    Seriously, Bomb Pops are still my favorite popsicle.

  • Eduard van Haalen||

    $5 just gets you a relationship status on Facebook or the equivalent.

    But for twice the price, you can get so much more...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l-MJnHsK3cI

  • ||

    Wife got me a Jayne Cobb hat for V-day.

    Pretty cunning, don'cha think?

  • ||

    The one his mom sent him? I venture to say you look ridiculous in that hat.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Shhh! Don't antagonize him! Man walks down the street in that hat, people know he's not afraid of anything.

  • ||

    Damn straight!

  • ||

    Not how ya look in it...

    ...it's that ya got one.

  • Archduke Pantsfan||

  • ||

    The very same.

  • Virginian||

  • The Late P Brooks||

    "I see a man walkin' down the street in that hat, I say, 'There goes a man who ain't afraid of nuthin'.'"

  • Coeus||

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