Kids to be Banned From Blowing Candles out in Australia, Chinese State Media Warns North Korea Over Nuke Test, Majority of Americans Think the Federal Government Threatens Liberty: P.M. Links

  • Australian children will be banned from blowing out candles on communal cakes thanks to new guidelines from The National Health and Medical Research Council. 
  • Chinese state media has called for a “heavy price” to be imposed on North Korea if the reclusive regime conducts a planned nuclear test. 

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  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Australian children will be banned from blowing out candles on communal cakes...

    When you think about it, who wants to eat some kid's germ-ridden cake?

  • ||

    Don't make a wish!

  • Tonio||

    No, communal cakes, as in communes. Even hippies deserve freedom.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    On second thought, doesn't the Foster's their kids use to wash down the cake kill any germs?

  • Bobarian||

    I think you SF'd that somehow...

    Without even linking to anything.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    On second thought, doesn't the Foster's [beer that] their kids use to wash down the cake kill any germs?

  • Way Of The Crane||

    Australian for Listerine?

  • NeonCat||

    And birthday cakes are almost always unfair in terms of portions served. Each child should have their own cupcake of appropriate size. The child whose birth is being celebrated could have a small, single LED flashlight (properly sterilized, of course) stuck in their cupcake. They may turn out the flashlight after making their wish, as long as that wish would not hurt the feelings of any other children or caregivers present.

  • Virginian||

  • Tonio||

    No, I don't want to hurl, thanks.

  • ||

    Pass.

  • AZ||

    The comments actually were, in large part, remarkably sane.

  • ||

    I meant the article itself. One paragraph in and the writer was already droning. Horrible.

  • nicole||

    It was remarkably bad writing.

  • Hugh Akston||

    Who knew Inside Higher Ed was recruiting from LiveJournal?

  • Red Rocks Rockin||

    That was the first thing I thought from the opening paragraph. The whole thing reads like some SWPL teenage girl's fantasy of what she thinks it's like to own a gun.

  • ||

    in my classroom, in our sanctuary?

    Our sanctuary? That's a weird word to use for a fucking classroom.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Academia is a sanctuary from the real world.

  • Drake||

    A special place where pompous, pretentious douche-bags gather in a big gun-free zone. People who need a degree have pretend to respect them in order to get a passing grade.

  • Way Of The Crane||

    Safe from the prying eyes of parents?... it kinda fits.

  • Stormy Dragon||

    I dunno, comparing a classroom to a zoo seems, in many cases, quite accurate to me.

  • db||

    Also, the sanctuary is the part of the church where the sacred mysteries are carried out and from which priests speak the infallible word of God to the unwashed masses.

  • Brandon||

    I actually liked the comments.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    The majority of Americans now believe that the federal government is a threat to their liberties.

    Technically, the state is the only threat to one's rights.

  • Hugh Akston||

    Don't you ever get tired of trying to be technically correct?

  • ||

    But it's the best kind of correct, Hugh.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    I'm curious how that works. Some random guy coming up to you and beating your face because you said that Obama sucks isn't violating your rights?

  • np||

    The difference is that you're justified in defense/attacking back and seeking restitution

    Can't do that with the state

  • Generic Stranger||

    True, but there are more levels of government than state. There are municipal, county, state, and world levels to choose from.

  • Generic Stranger||

    *more levels of government than federal.

  • John||

    Shocker: Obamacare exchange subsidies will cost $233 billion more than expected, according to the Congressional Budget Office.

    But I thought we had to bend the cost curve?

  • Specail Sauce||

    It's bending alright, like a hockey stick.

  • ||

    Shoulda sprung for Nev-R-Break brand gloves instead of Seld-M-Break.

  • ||

    What the fuck? That was not supposed to go here.

  • NeonCat||

    "That's what the wymyn of feministing said."

  • Auric Demonocles||

    T o n y: Imagine how horrible it would have been if we hadn't implemented Obamacare! Prices would have gone up $466 billion! Things were just worse than we thought when we made those predictions.

  • db||

    Don't worry, because increased aggregate demand. It fixes everything.

  • C. Anacreon||

    Yup, we'll make it all up on volume.

  • Matrix||

  • ||

    Look, they need more funding!

  • Sevo||

    Don't worry. Some black kid with a joint will stall take it in the shorts.

  • Rich||

    Superintendent Garry McCarthy has instructed officers not to respond to ... crime where the offender is no longer at the scene.

    I suppose it'll mean more deaths. 8-(

  • Brandon||

    I suppose it'll mean fewer deaths.

  • Ice Nine||

    More hit and runs, for sure.

  • ||

    More dogs will live though.

  • Brett L||

    Fun Florida news:

    Man arrested for DUI inside Walmart.
    Timothy Carr, 48, was spotted at about 9 p.m. Sunday drunk and driving a motorized shopping cart around a Walmart in Brooksville, Tampa TV station WFLA reported.

    He was drinking an alcoholic beverage he had taken off a shelf and knocking items off shelves with the cart, according to the Tampa Tribune.

    Man claiming to be Obama calls 4 year old girl a hooker, attempts to abduct her. Sounds more like he thought he was Sen. Menendez.

  • Matrix||

    How can someone driving on private property be arrested for a DUI?

    Granted, this guy should probably be punished for being a menace and putting people in harms way.

    But if you're on private property, drinking and decide to operate a motor vehicle, it should not be a DUI/DWI. It should be nothing unless 1) it's not your property and the owners of said property don't want you there, or 2) the vehicle you are operating is not your own and the owner does not consent to your operating it sober or otherwise.

  • Brett L||

    Operation of any vehicle under the influence is illegal in Florida, period. This includes bicycles and horses (provided you are holding the reins. I believe someone successfully argued that as he had tied the reins to the saddlehorn before mounting, he was not "driving" the horse.)

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Horses are "vehicles" in Florida?

  • Brett L||

    From the relevant Chapter:
     VEHICLE.—Every device, in, upon, or by which any person or property is or may be transported or drawn upon a highway, excepting devices used exclusively upon stationary rails or tracks.

    Which is weird, because neither bicycles nor horses are allowed on highways. But I know of DUIs on bikes personally and have heard of DUIs on horses.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Does that mean shoes count?

  • NeonCat||

    Only those ones for kids with the wheels in the heels. You'll also be cited for not having turn signals.

  • C. Anacreon||

    I wish someone in California would get cited for not using turn signals in their actual car, maybe it would change some behaviors. It's gotten so bad that you have to approach a green light very cautiously because the oncoming driver may just turn left in front of you -- in fact you kind of assume that, and are surprised when they go straight through. I always imagine it as the height of selfishness, as in "I know which way I am going, why do I need to flick this lever? Everyone else should be able to figure out what I am doing."

    Worst offender: Prius drivers. I'm not sure those even come with signals, because I've never seen them used in one.

  • KWebb||

    In traffic laws, highways usually mean any road and maybe the entire right of way the road is on. As far as traffic laws are concerned, a 20 mph street ending in cul de sac is a highway.

    Controlled access highways, things most normal people think of as highways, are different.

  • Stormy Dragon||

    Which is weird, because neither bicycles nor horses are allowed on highways.

    The Amish beg to differ.

  • db||

    Next week on South Beach Dutch: Zebediah gets pulled over for DUI and the police find a load of cocaine and guns under the floorboards of his buggy. Plus: will Ann show some ankle?

  • Aresen||

    Actually, in many jurisdictions, horses are 'vehicles' for the purposes of the Highway or Motor Vehicle Acts.

    This means that riders must abide by the same rules of the road as a motor vehicle - signalling turns, going the proper direction in a lane, etc.

  • Coeus||

    How can someone driving on private property be arrested for a DUI?

    They say you had the intent to drive on public roads. And I believe that this future crime bullshit has been upheld in every state it's been tried.

  • nicole||

    Don't a lot of places also get you if you're just sitting in the car drunk with the keys in your possession? E.g., when you're sleeping it off in your car after leaving the bar and knowing you can't drive home, or whatever.

  • BakedPenguin||

    I think in most places the keys have to be in the ignition. Otherwise you can argue that you stopped wherever you were and got drunk there.

  • ||

    Yes, some places the key has to be in the ignition. They have also nailed people riding bikes drunk, and even lawn tractors.

    Isn't the "rule of law" fun?

  • ||

    In PA, if you have they keys in your possession, they got you. At least that's how it was 25 years ago.

  • Chris Mallory||

    The reasoning the Kentucky courts used was that you might leave private property and drive on the ROADZ!!!!.
    We had a case where a drunk couple got in a fight, the husband drove to the creek on the farm and got arrested for DUI.

  • Mensan||

    Hey, a local story. They could at least specify which Walmart. There are two in Brooksville.

  • Matrix||

  • Virginian||

    The Republicans in the Assembly came to kick ass and chew bubblegum this year, and they didn't bring a single piece to Richmond with them.

  • BigT||

    Hail to the King, Baby!

  • Brett L||

    Serious question, can they do this Constitutionally?

  • John||

    Article I section 10

    No State shall enter into any Treaty, Alliance, or Confederation; grant Letters of Marque and Reprisal; coin Money;

    I don't see how it is. And it is more than a bit ironic that the people pushing it probably think of themselves as strict constitutionalists.

  • Emmerson Biggins||

    Agreed.

    But how about "No State shall ... make any Thing but gold and silver Coin a Tender in Payment of Debts" ?

    They wouldn't have to coin any money. Just state that all (state) taxes have to be paid in gold or silver. And they could pay all public employees in gold and silver. And if a private company happened to spring into existence, due to heavy subsidies, that just weighs out units of gold and silver and certifies that the weight and purity are right, well, that sure would be mighty convenient.

  • John||

    That wouldn't fly. That is coining money. The moment the state buys a reserve of gold and starts printing certificates backed up by it, they are coining money. No way around it.

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Biggins didn't say anything about certificates.

  • np||

    They could effectively and constitutionally nullify legal tender laws by allowing gold and silver bullion to be used as money and allow private bank notes without having to do anything themselves. They can still leave the minting of gold/silver Eagles to the Feds

  • Way Of The Crane||

    States could not coin money but in the mid 1800's they did issue their own currency backed by gold and silver.

    check out the Free Banking Era

  • pmains||

    Bonus: the over-labeled political cartoon. (Is there any other kind?) The sheaf of wheat actually is labeled, "the crops."

  • Rich||

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Two Miami-Dade police officers have been fired after an investigation found that they ignored emergency calls.

    I knew Reno 911 was a documentary.

  • Eduard van Haalen||

    They should work in Chicago.

  • Generic Stranger||

    Because when seconds count, the police are minutes away completely ignoring your pleas for help.

  • Mensan||

  • Generic Stranger||

    More like coincidence. I didn't follow that link (I rarely do since they've started linking to 24/7 instead of the actual fucking article) so I hadn't seen your post until now.

    It was kind of the obvious quip to make.

  • Mensan||

    I figured it was coincidence. I forgot the facetiousness tag.

  • ||

    It's looking more and more like Disney's Star Wars game plan will rely on spin-offs for characters like Han Solo and Boba Fett.

  • Virginian||

    How is this a bad plan?

    Starring Nathan Fillion as Han Solo.

  • Brett L||

    Remember when people thought it was a good thing to get Lucas out of the SW universe?

  • Hugh Akston||

    You mean this George Lucas?

  • Acosmist||

    Still is. Not even close. You were saying?

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    So long as they're doing this, here's my idea:

    An MST3000-style ministries that will cover the prequel trilogy (and the holiday special), with riffs provided by the characters from the original trilogy.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    Oh look. More Boba Fett wankery coming down the pipe. No doubt Fett will fight Emperor Palpatine to a standstill or some other horseshit that will delight Mandalorian fanboys everywhere.

  • Mensan||

    Fett's not a Mandalorian.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    Yes he's human. Mandalorians aren't a race.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    Nonsense. Boba Fett followed all six tents of Resol'nare, he is mando'ade true and true.

  • ||

    If they were to use the Star Wars expanded universe novels as a basis for the Han Solo and Boba Fett movies, I would have ZERO problems with this.

  • Sevo||

    "Shocker: Obamacare exchange subsidies will cost $233 billion more than expected,..."

    Well, Pelosi is shocked!

  • Raven Nation||

    Are you serious??!!

  • db||

    We didn't have to pass it to find out that was in it.

  • John||

    Two FBI sources have told The Daily Caller that the bureau’s inquiry into Democratic New Jersey Senator Bob Menendez is now based in New Jersey, not Miami. One added that pressure is mounting from the highest levels of the Justice Department to pursue the investigation.

    The change of focus away from the bureau’s Miami field office indicates that the government is focused primarily on Sen. Menendez — and not on his longtime donor Dr. Salomon Melgen, as political observers have speculated.

    Read more: http://dailycaller.com/2013/02.....z2K9pOjUoE

  • ||

    Methinks Dr. Melgen may give money to other politicians as well.

  • John||

    It is always a bitch when your hookup for underage whores gets busted for medicare fraud.

  • DJF||

    There is Medicare fraud in Florida, I am shocked!

  • Brett L||

    I used to get the weekly emails of "emergency suspensions" of licensed medical practitioners in FL when I worked at the Dept of Health. Far and away, docs get it for Medicare fraud and nurses get it for substance abuse. There were at least two docs a week. And those are the ones they caught.

  • Mensan||

    At what point does use become abuse?

  • Brett L||

    This looks like great fun.

  • Rich||

    The latest national survey by the Pew Research Center ... finds that 53% think that the federal government threatens their own personal rights and freedoms

    There's that 47% thingy again.

    It's time for the President to address speak publicly about this nasty development.

  • Brett L||

    Kinkajous, the libertarians of the raccoon family.

    According to local news station MyFoxNews, the responding deputy was bitten through his puncture-proof gloves while attempting to capture the cranky mammal, which was then taken to a nearby animal shelter. The kinkajou immediately escaped the confines of its cage and began bothering a bunch of cats before being recaptured.

  • $park¥||

    He was just trying to get a little pussy.

  • Brandon||

    bitten through his puncture-proof gloves

    Seems like they need to start calling those something else.

  • Brett L||

    "Puncture resistant" gloves.

  • Mensan||

    ... the South American mammal was discovered rooting around a rooftop in Wise County, Texas, it scared the homeowners and nearby residents. Worse, it went on to bite a deputy.

    Worse? I thought that was the best part.

  • John||

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    "While I support the Second Amendment and citizen rights to bear arms, I strongly believe guns do not belong in public spaces," he said.

    Sigh.

  • Rich||

    "Moreover, any mentally-sound person also believes this."

  • Virginian||

    "While I support the Second Amendment and citizen rights to bear arms, I strongly believe guns do not belong in public spaces,"

    Holy shit could you be more contradictory?

  • Anonymous Coward||

    So disarm the police, then?

  • ||

    "While I support the Second Amendment and citizen rights to bear arms, I strongly believe guns do not belong in public spaces,"

    Shorter version; "I dont support the second amendment."

  • ||

  • Brett L||

    Once we get the light-year gap manageable, anything is relatively close by.

  • DJF||

    And then those blue people and their tree better watch out.

  • ||

    What you did there, I done seen it.

  • ||

    Yeah, but what if one planet, say, the sixth one in a system, explodes and makes, say, the fifth one no longer habitable? What then?

  • Rich||

    Damn, Epi, what a Buzz Lightyear kill.

  • ||

    Then only the fact of my genetically-engineered intellect would allow us to survive.

  • ||

    You lie! On the fifth planet there was life! A fair chance...

  • ||

    THIS IS THE FIFTH PLANET!

  • Auric Demonocles||

    Easy, you use your light sabers and Force powers to cut your way out of the explosions, then you dive through the stargate to get to the rendezvous on the other side of the 'Verse where Serenity will pick you up.

  • Coeus||

    More feminist bullshit about prostitution.

    The problem seems to be one of philosophy vs. practicality, and what should dictate policy. My view is basically that sex work wouldn’t exist in the feminist utopia. Why? Because sex wouldn’t be this commodified thing that some people (mostly woman) have and other people (mostly men) get. Sex would be a fun thing, a collaborative thing, always entered into freely and enthusiastically and without coercion. While that view would leave room for some types of sex work — sexually explicit performance, for example, if that performance were no longer primarily a looking-at-women’s-bodies-as-stand-ins-for-sex thing, which is what it mostly is today — it doesn’t leave room for offering money in exchange for sex, especially as we see it now, with men being the primary consumers and sex being seen as something you can buy.

    It really is true. They don't even know that ugly, shy and or awkward guys exist. Or maybe they just plan to round them up and put them in camps. Reminds me of the time I went with a few women to Roc bar. One of them had 7 or 8 guys approach her. After we left, she bitched that no guys had talked to her.

  • ||

    It's not sex they object to, it's the work.

  • ||

    No, I think you're wrong. It the men they object to.

  • ||

    And work was invented by men, so I'm technically correct.

  • ||

    I thought work was invented by your mom.

  • Bobarian||

    Technically, she made sex be work...

  • NeonCat||

    It's the clocking in and out that I found most objectionable.

  • Enough About Palin||

    ;-)

  • Coeus||

    Bingo. If feminist utopia, the bottom 80% of males (by whatever criteria they're focusing on that decade) will be culled.

  • Brett L||

    They're right, about it being primarily a female occupation but miss the point: Men, primarily, pay for casual sex. Since 95% of men are straight, most prostitution or sex-work is going to involve women. This is not repressive or discriminatory. Its just the way genetically successful humans are built.

  • ||

    Hetero male prostitutes can't make money, period, end of story. Many anecdotes on Maggie McNeill's blog.

  • John||

    If a woman just wants sex with a stranger, she can have it for free. Even homely girls could get laid if they really wanted to.

  • ||

    That, and the fact of the matter is most women need to at least have a decent conversation with a man before fucking him. There needs to be some sort of je ne sais quoi there, even for a one night stand.

  • John||

    And the actual female demand for one night stands NSA sex is a lot lower than advertised. Most women want at least a boyfriend if not a husband. If most women just wanted NSA sex, married men would have an endless supply of mistresses. Who is better for a one night stand than someone who is married and guaranteed not to stalk you afterwards?

  • Ice Nine||

    They really want to.

  • Red Rocks Rockin||

    Even homely girls could get laid if they really wanted to.

    Just consider Lena Dunham. (Notice I didn't say, "look at.")

  • John||

    There are thousands of guys every year who just finish long prison terms.

  • Bobarian||

    This sounds like a proposal to tranplant male brains into female bodies, because that 'feminist utopia' sounds what I picture a gay bath-house being like, except with vagina.

  • Bobarian||

    sounds 'like'

  • nicole||

    My view is basically that sex work wouldn’t exist in the feminist utopia. Why? Because sex wouldn’t be this commodified thing that some people (mostly woman) have and other people (mostly men) get.

    It's almost like it never dawned on her that some men might want more sex than they can get without it being a commodity. Just like I want more food than I could get if it weren't a commodity. Or, you know, fucking anything else.

  • Brett L||

    Remember, its okay for a woman to look for a man who will provide her with "security" in any relationship that lasts more than one night, longer than that or wanting it in cash is gauche.

  • nicole||

    Wait, what? Is that worded right? I'm lost between "provide" and "longer than that".

  • Brett L||

    Sorry. s/longer/shorter

  • nicole||

    Ah okay, thanks.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    My view is basically that sex work wouldn’t exist in the feminist utopia. Why? Because sex wouldn’t be this commodified thing that some people (mostly woman) have and other people (mostly men) get.

    Incorrect. Women don't have sex; They sell sex. Men buy it. You take a woman out on a date with the idea of trying to get laid? You're putting in a bid for sex. Buy a woman a drink? Bidding for sex. Buying jewelry? Bidding for sex. Marriage contract? Until the last 100 years, you were pretty explicitly buying sex, but from the same person.

    Prostitution has one great virtue of all of the aforementioned scenarios: It is honest. Prostitution might be the most honest form of sexual encounter in human history. One party pays money, the other party gets sexual intercourse.

  • Generic Stranger||

    My view is basically that sex work wouldn’t exist in the feminist utopia.

    FTFH

  • buybuydandavis||

    "always entered into freely and enthusiastically and without coercion. "

    Always? Sign me up for Femitopia!

  • ||

    More players being PED-providing Biogenesis clinic.

    Well I'm happy that there aren't any Dodgers on that list, which would have been all the more pathetic given their lack of offense for the past 2 years.

  • DJF||

    “””LaHood: ‘America is one big pothole’ “””

    http://thehill.com/blogs/trans.....-right-now

    Maybe if LaHood had not kept on taking gas tax money and wasting on cho-cho trains we would have less potholes. Where I live they built an over priced under performing ‘light rail” line right next to the interstate full of pot holes, yet the interstate carries far more people then his cho-cho

  • Brandon||

    Has any retiring bureaucrat ever said anything other than "I would've succeeded if it hadn't been for those meddling taxpayers not giving me enough money?"

  • Juice||

    You fill the potholes with the department you have not the department you might want or wish to have at a later time.

  • Brandon||

    Well this just misses the entire point of empire-building.

  • rts||

    Canada-U.S. price gap report calls for import tax cut

    So a bunch of Senators, desperate to make themselves relevant, studied why the same stuff in Canada costs so much more than the equivalent stuff in the US and the answer is mostly... taxes! Surprise!

    Members of the national finance committee spent more than a year hearing from 53 experts, including consumer groups and manufacturers, as they studied why Canadian prices differ from American when the dollar is close to equal.

    The committee says factors influencing price include transportation costs, the relative size of the Canadian market — and tariffs, or taxes on imports.

    At least they're calling for tax and tariff reductions.

  • Ska||

    My Shadronea

    Oh....right.... PM links.

  • $park¥||

    Here it is in a nutshell.

    Just kill them before they kill us. At some point, we must trust that the president and his advisers, when they see a gathering of Al Qaeda from the watchful eye of a drone, are going to make the right call and use appropriate restraint and appropriate force to keep us safe.

    Frankly, it should be American policy that any American collaborating with Al Qaeda is better off dead than alive. Richard Nixon and Dick Cheney should be proud.

  • ||

    Is he...is he being sarcastic?

  • ||

    I...think?

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Erick Erickson is the dude who runs Redstate. He went full retard and banned all Paulbots. So I'm guessing no.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    GoDaddy Ad: Symbolic Revenge Porn for Fat Nerds? (You know who I'm linking to, folks)

    Sadly, I did not have time to watch the Puppy Bowl ads. Breaking down who had the most offensively misogynist ads on the Monday after the Super Bowl has become an internet tradition, and it’s clear that it’s one that is having an impact. Last year, misogyny rates seemed down, and this year they seem to have falled further.

    Is there something in feminist theory that has is in for proofreaders?

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

  • Brandon||

    So Amanda Marcotte is offended by the ad about the skinny guy who goes to prom and kisses the pretty girl, who then smiles and seems not overly upset about it, and leaves. She blames the ad on rape culture. According to Marcotte, you should have a signed, notarized release form from a girl before you ever attempt to kiss her, hold her hand or even lay a finger on her. Otherwise it's rape.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    But how does Amanda know that the subsequent black eye of the kiss-stealer was caused by the prom king date and not by the prom queen?

    GRRL POWAH!

  • NeonCat||

    Notarizing forces an imprint into a piece of paper. It is, therefore, a form of rape, and like rape, the scars last a lifetime.

    Try again, Patriarchal scum.

  • Andrew S.||

    Actually, I guessed wrong. I figured this would be from one of the "writers" on Jezebel.

  • ||

    Happy Birthday to Entourage actress and upcoming Dr. Carol Marcus in the next Star Trek movie Alice Eve.

  • Brett L||

    Where are all the chicks with nice racks and heterochromia in my area.

  • John||

    All the young girls love Alice...

  • ||

    I find the most erotic part of her is the boobies.

  • ||

    TEH WARTY GAZE!©

    (10x more aggressive than teh male gaze©)

  • John||

    It is so bad that Alice Eve is traumatized just by him looking at her photo.

  • ||

    Those 10 grams of Trenbolone I've been taking every day have really helped me with my woman-menacing.

  • ||

    If you have Reasonable, you will see that Warty's avatar is actually rather appropriate for a "gaze".

  • nicole||

    So I never noticed the Gravatar option, and now I turned it on, and my fucking Gravatar is not showing right? Thanks a lot for giving me a totally unimportant problem to try to fix.

  • ||

    Exit Chrome entirely and come back in. If it doesn't show immediately, it will soon.

    Man, chicks and technology. Sigh.

  • ||

    I'm guessing the only way to show your personalized gravatar is to show an email address? I guess I could enter a fake one...

  • ||

    Who took ronswansonsbitch@gmail.com goddammit??

  • nicole||

    Give yourself some credit, Kristen. You want Ron Swanson to be your bitch.

  • ||

    No way - I'd lose all respek for him if that were to happen!

  • ||

    Well, you know what the Tammys are like.

  • $park¥||

    Bruce Willis just says no to gun control.

    "No one commits a crime because they saw a film. There's nothing to support that," Willis said. "We're not making movies about people that have gone berserk, or gone nuts. Those kind of movies wouldn't last very long at all."

    Willis added that he doesn't see how additional legislation could prevent future mass shootings.

    "It's a difficult thing and I really feel bad for those families," he said. "I'm a father and it's just a tragedy. But I don't know how you legislate insanity. I don't know what you do about it. I don't even know how you begin to stop that."

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    IIRC Bruce Willis is either libertarian or conservative (can't remember which).

  • Matrix||

    "I'm sick of answering this fucking question. I'm a Republican only as far as I want a smaller government, I want less government intrusion. I want them to stop shitting on my money and your money and tax dollars that we give 50 percent of... every year. I want them to be fiscally responsible and I want these goddamn lobbyists out of Washington. Do that and I'll say I'm a Republican... I hate the government, OK? I'm apolitical. Write that down. I'm not a Republican."

    From Wikipedia

  • ||

    Bruce Willis, heretofore fairly hot, just became scorchingly, hellishly hot.

  • nicole||

    Bruce Willis, heretofore fairly hot, just became scorchingly, hellishly hot.

    This is real.

  • ||

    I approve of this message, because it made me laugh.

  • Coeus||

    Definitely a libertarian.

  • rts||

    Well...

    In 2006, he said that the United States should invade Colombia, in order to end the drug trafficking.

    From the same Wiki article.

  • Coeus||

    So he's Donderooo?

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    Willis just fell to 85 on the LP Purity Scale.

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    That's great.

  • Rich||

    "We're not making movies about people that have gone berserk, or gone nuts."

    Right.

  • rts||

    I guess he's never seen Falling Down.

  • Matrix||

    I immediately thought of that when I read that article this morning.

  • Killazontherun||

    Or Taxi Driver. I don't get why he included that bit there at the end. It is distracting to the point he is making like if I were to start on about the Trappiste Rochefort 10 I'm staring at the moment and can't have until the end of the week would be to the point I'm raising here.

  • Brandon||

    Millions of lefties are about to discover that they never really liked Die Hard that much anyway.

  • ||

    Well, if it gets them to hate on Armageddon at least some good will come of it.

  • Brandon||

    You know what? Armageddon will be seen by future generations as the epitome of the craft of movie-making. Genius is never appreciated in its own time.

  • ||

    YOU SHUT YOUR DIRTY WHORE MOUTH

    As we all know, Michael Bay will be most remembered for Bad Boys II.

  • Brandon||

    I assume the triumvirate will be Armageddon, Bad Boys and Bad Boys II, with Armageddon being slightly above the other two because of its stand-alone brilliance.

  • ||

    You like Con Air, don't you.

  • Brandon||

    No, it was a steaming pile of crap. The Rock, was Cage's magnum opus.

  • ||

    How can you possibly rank The Rock over The Wicker Man?!?

  • Stormy Dragon||

    Adaptation was Cage's best movie.

  • wakeup||

    Hey Shirley! you jest!
    Cage's best work is yet to come in National Treasure 3

  • Stormy Dragon||

    And I'm not being sarcastic here, that's one of my favorite movies ever.

  • sticks||

    Adaptation was Cage's best movie.

    Fuck that. Vampire's Kiss. Raising Arizon. Wild at Heart.

  • ||

    Fast Times at Ridgemont High, hands down.

  • Brandon||

    Yeah, my brother used to say the same thing about that boring pile of shit when he was his pretentious college-freshman douchebag phase too. At least he grew out of it.

  • Slithery D||

    You ever noticed how most Nick Cage movie titles work well as penis names?

  • The Immaculate Trouser||

    Bruce Willis' nuanced portrayal of Bruce Willis will surely go down in history.

  • Jesus H. Christ||

    I've got a love/hate thing going for Liv Tyler. I love her until she starts giving her own personal opinion, then I haz a sad because she's stupid.

  • BuSab Agent||

    Big mouth rock star and super model is not exactly the gene pool for genius.

  • Raven Nation||

    Although, the scene near the beginning with Willis driving golf balls into the Greenpeace ship was pretty funny.

  • Raven Nation||

    Although, the scene near the beginning with Willis driving golf balls into the Greenpeace ship was pretty funny.

  • Raven Nation||

    F*?$ing squirrels.

  • BuSab Agent||

    The squirrels like that scene too.

  • Raven Nation||

    +1

  • Drake||

    He used assault weapons to kill freedom fighters who were trying to redistribute the accumulated wealth of a greedy corporation. Why would they have ever liked that movie?

  • Brandon||

    Because it's fuckin Die Hard. Have you ever met anyone who didn't like Die Hard? Of course not.

  • ||

    Carl Winslow!

  • General Butt Naked||

  • Matrix||

    I don't think Willis has ever been secretive about his political views. He's supported Republican candidates for a long time. He's mostly 'conservative'.

  • Mensan||

    '"We're not making movies about people that have gone berserk, or gone nuts."'

    Rampage

  • Brett L||

    So the larval form of the Ancient Ones has been found. Holy fucking creepy.

  • ||

    Did they find that in an ancient abandoned city hidden in the mountains in Antarctica?

  • Auric Demonocles||

    According to Wikipedia:

    P. sulcus is known from a single specimen caught by the German research vessel R/V Walther Herwig in an open net off Tristan Da Cunha, southern Atlantic Ocean (36°49′S 12°17′W), at a depth of 1,750–2,000 m (5,740–6,600 ft)

    So basically Hitler found it by searching in the darkest depths he could, and there is only one in existence.

  • Brett L||

    I can't remember, are they with us or against us for CASE NIGHTMARE GREEN?

  • ||

    I'm pretty sure they don't give a fuck what happens to us in CASE NIGHTMARE GREEN.

  • Brett L||

    So they're like gingers and have no souls to be eaten. Hmmm. I can see that. You'd think the Laundry would keep more gingers around for just that reason.

  • ||

    Nobody wants gingers around. And anyway, they already have Angleton.

  • Rich||

  • ||

    Fuck, a beholder! Kill it!

  • Generic Stranger||

    Isn't that the fucking squid baby thing from Prometheus? SHIT, they've made it to Earth. We're fucked.

  • BuSab Agent||

    Nah man, they were always here, but yes we're fucked.

  • Generic Stranger||

    I don't know...is Prometheus canon? If so, then AvP can't really be canon, as Prometheus kind of implies the xenomorphs weren't created until that specific run-in. The ones in the other Alien(s) movies were much more developed compared to the one that crawled out of the Engineer, implying it was the first. That means AvP doesn't actually exist in the Alien(s) universe.

  • ||

    Postal Service to end Saturday deliveries, Ralph Nader is not happy.

  • ||

    Anything that makes Nader unhappy makes me happy. It's the Law of Conservation of Happiness.

  • ||

    Sensible law.

  • BuSab Agent||

    I'm swiping this.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    The most important news story of the day:

    Does Bill Maher owe Donald Trump $5 million?

    LOS ANGELES (CN) - Donald Trump is not "the spawn of his mother having sex with an orangutan," and demands in court that Bill Maher pay him the $5 million Maher offered on "The Tonight Show" if Trump could "come up with proof" that it isn't so.
    Trump sued Maher, the political commentator, for breach of contract, in Superior Court. Trump also complains that Maher compared Trump's Twitter posts to "the work of a 'syphilitic monkey.'"
    Trump did not, however, sue for defamation - just for breach of contract.

    The entire Bill Maher segment (Trump/Orangutang[sp?] starts at 6:30)

    Will the legions of trained libertarian attorneys chime in as to whether or not Bill Maher made a legally enforceable promise to Donald Trump?

  • Romulus Augustus||

    Hmm; what percentage of dna does The Donald share with Orangutans? Aren't we all cousins to the apes?

  • OldMexican||

    Re: Romulus Augustus,

    Hmm; what percentage of dna does The Donald share with Orangutans? Aren't we all cousins to the apes?


    Not enough for Maher to win the bet.

  • Juice||

    What contract?

  • Anonymous Coward||

    The unilateral one Bill Maher made when he made a promise to pay $5 million for the consideration of Donald Trump proving that his parents are not orangutans.

  • sticks||

    Eh I thought it was a joke.

  • sticks||

    watching clip, only an idiot or Trump could think that was an actual offer of some kind and not a bit for late night.

  • Generic Stranger||

    I'm going to laugh my ass off if the court finds in favor of Trump, though. Bill Maher is such a douchenozzle he kind of deserves it.

  • sticks||

    They both deserve something. Each other?

  • anarch||

    Volokh covers this, and some of the comments (below the McDonald's coffee dispute) are very funny:

    http://www.volokh.com/2013/02/.....ill-maher/

  • Anonymous Coward||

    Unfortunately for Maher, it was not a "bit," it was an interview, conducted for the purpose of promoting Maher's political talkshow.

  • ||

    I guess I'll take up Sloopy's nutpunching mantle today: Judge overturns civil verdict against police officer who shot and killed a mentally ill man.

    The eight-member jury agreed unanimously in September that Sgt. Richard Celli had not acted in self-defense or for any other legitimate purpose when he shot Richard DeSantis, who had gotten up from the ground, where he had been ordered to stay, and headed toward Celli and other officers. Jurors awarded $343,000 to his wife and daughter for economic losses and $268,000 to the family for emotional distress and loss of love and companionship.

    That verdict was "contrary to the clear weight of the evidence," U.S. District Judge Jeffrey White of San Francisco said Monday.

  • ||

    did you RTFA?

    sounds like the judge did the right thing

    darn that pesky rule of law...

  • ||

    Pesky rule of like a trial by a jury of one's peers in which the guy was found liable? Sounds like that's what he got.

  • iggy||

    "Officers said DeSantis knelt at first in response to their commands, then rose and charged at them. One officer shot him with a plastic projectile that broke his arm. Witnesses disagreed about what he did next, but Celli said DeSantis kept charging until he and two other officers opened fire."

    So, in the officer's story, he and two other police officers could find no other way to subdue a single, unarmed man with a broken than to gun him down.

    You don't know what rule of law means, do you Dunphy?

  • iggy||

    'Broken ARM.' We need an edit button.

  • iggy||

    I mean Jesus, if I shot a man in that situation I'd probably be found liable.

  • ||

    The fact that a jury found him liable is a sign that he must have had a pretty weak defense.

    Most people tend to be sympathetic to cops.

  • BuSab Agent||

    Yep, the judge substituted his opinion for the jury's. When Dunphy says Rule of Law, he means Rule of Lawyers.

  • ||

    The Huffington Post has low standards.

    Respect that America needs to talk about this massacre considering many factors and nuances. So, stop making wild accusations, calling people morons, and trying to shut down discussion.

    Ok, sounds great, calm and non-excitable Korean chick.

    Also, if you really believe the government is out to get you, it's likely that you suffer from a mental illness.

    Oh, wait. She wasn't calm and non-excitable after all.

  • ||

    Well in her defense she's a moron.

  • Sevo||

    There is that; she is an idiot.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    The Constitution doesn't mention online identity theft.

    The only crime the Constitution specifically names is treason. Therefore treason is the only illegal act in America. /Annabel Park Derp

  • ||

    Does anyone really have to read farther than, "I just wish you loved the First Amendment as much as your reading of the Second Amendment"?

  • iggy||

    "Dear friends who can't tolerate anyone bringing up gun control: You're not going to intimidate me with your !!!!s, ????s, WORDS IN ALL CAPS, namecalling, and threats to unfriend. I am going to speak my mind regardless of your protestations."

    So what I'm getting is that you couldn't stop posting stupid shit about gun control on Facebook, people got annoyed by the stupid shit you wouldn't stop posting, you responded by writing a post on HuffPo. This person sounds totally insufferable.

  • Brandon||

    Look at her bio:

    She is the founder and president of Coffee Party USA, a growing grassroots, non-partisan network of over half a million people fighting for Wall Street reform, campaign finance reform, and tax code reform. She studied philosophy at Boston University and political theory at Oxford University as a Marshall Scholar.

    She's apparently a very intelligent, pretentious insufferable busybody who has never considered the actual results of the crap she advocates beyond "it makes me feel good."

  • iggy||

    Goddammit. If I weren't such a gentleman, that bio would make me want to punch her in the face.

    'Coffee Party USA?' Why not just name your group "You should all hate us because we are terrible."

  • ||

    non-partisan

    HA!

  • Brandon||

    She's Tony.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    You might be on to something there...

  • Brandon||

    This is the best (Most infuriating, condescending, wishy-washy bullshit) part:

    [This is not directed at all gun owners. Just the ones who don't want to engage in any policy discussions involving stricter guns laws and try to shout people down invoking the Second Amendment.]

    Condescending and dishonest.

  • iggy||

    "Don't want to engage in any policy discussions involving STRICTER GUN LAWS."

    She's angry that people who don't believe we should have stricter gun laws won't talk to her about how we should have stricter gun laws. This is hilarious.

  • Brandon||

    No, she doesn't want them to talk to her about it. She wants them to sit and be harangued quietly while she waves pictures of dead children in their faces.

  • ||

    "World's fattest man" loses 644 pounds, down to 336:

    http://health.yahoo.net/expert.....630-pounds

    "He estimates that he used to eat about 20,000 calories a day, about eight times the recommended amount for an average man."

  • JeremyR||

    But wait, I thought to fat activists, what you eat had nothing to do with being fat?

  • ||

    What I would like to know is, since he was unable to leave his bedroom, who brought him his 20,000 calories' worth of food each day? Isn't that what they call "enabling"?

  • ||

    back in the day, when i was a frequent contributor to misc.fitness.weights on usenet, we had EPIC EPIC flamewars with SSFA (fat acceptance).

  • ||

    LOL I'd love to read through some of those archives . . .

  • Raven Nation||

    Dang. I don't think I COULD eat 20k calories a day.

  • Brandon||

    I used to eat 10,000 or so when I swam and played water polo. And people marvelled at how much I ate. I can't see 20,000 really being possible.

  • ||

    I used to eat 10,000 or so when I swam and played water polo.

    I've read that Michael Phelps, during training, takes in something like 12,000 calories a day. As for 20,000, I can't imagine that either. I suppose if you picked the fattiest, most calorie-dense foods you could find, then maybe it's possible.

  • Brandon||

    It also used to take me half an hour to take a dump, but I guess if you're stuck in your house anyway, that's not too much of an issue.

  • Tulpa (LAOL-PA)||

    Probably because you don't weigh 980 pounds.

    Just think about how huge a person who weighs that much would have to be. I'm a fairly big guy myself and it's almost 4 of me. Gah.

  • wakeup||

    WHO Really runs the world?

  • iggy||

    Dude, I think you might be insane.

  • Eduard van Haalen||

    Does it rhyme with "moose"?

  • Heroic Mulatto||

  • Hyperion||

    Not related to the thread here, but I thought it was worth a mention.

    I continue to find it not surprising that people from other countries come here and are shocked that America is not the great land of unrivaled freedom that they were led to believe.

    I have tried to tell my wife this for a long time now, but she is finally, a little at a time, starting to realize what I am talking about.

    Today, as I was at my computer working, she came to tell me something, apparently surprised and or upset about something.

    What I found out, was that she was watching some cop show on TV and the cops were putting undercover women on the streets, posing as prostitutes to lure men in and entrap them. She couldn't believe that,

    1. They would waste their time with something like this.

    2. That it was actually legal to entrap these guys like that.

    3. That this was happening, not in some 3rd world dictatorship, but here in the great free America.

    She also told me with a look of shock and dismay 'All of the guys they are arresting are Black or Hispanic!'

    I told her once again, 'You see, dear, that is why I am Libertarian, we will put a stop to non-sense like that, given a chance.'

  • iggy||

    You're a dangerous anti-government radical and you must be stopped.

  • Brandon||

    See, this is how my wife became a libertarian. If you point stuff like this out consistently, patiently and non-dickishly, people begin to see that these are not just exceptions to the benevolent-government rule.

  • ||

    1. They would waste their time with something like this.

    They don't. It generates income.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

  • BuSab Agent||

    How do you find these things?!? I mean what kind of bizarre surfing habits lead to discoveries like this.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    GURPS had a name for it, "weirdness magnet." I'm one of those.

  • BuSab Agent||

    So what super-powers did you gain in exchange for that?

  • Heroic Mulatto||

  • BuSab Agent||

    So nothing terribly useful. One of those skills that you end up never using 'cause you're "saving it for an emergency", then the whole session goes by and you haven't used it yet, but next session FER SURE!

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    The story of my life, man.

  • ||

    Come for the boring article, stay for the incredibly stupid comments.

    reckless abandon Henry Miller • 9 hours ago −
    Oh ron paul that explains it. Did you know under a libertarian government a state could vote slavery back? That when you cross state lines you have no idea what their laws are and how they effect you. Libertarian is Anarchy's version of government
    24 2 •Reply•Share ›

    Magnificent.

  • BuSab Agent||

    The profound ignorance on display there is ....words fail.

  • Hyperion||

    Good grief, it's fucking CNN, no wonder the comments are that stupid.

    Did you know under a libertarian government a state could vote slavery back?

    So, he thinks that you can just popular vote out a constitutional amendment? Again, no surprise, it's CNN.

    At least Libertarians know the correct usage for the word 'effect'.

  • BuSab Agent||

    +1 grammar pedant

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    RIGHT-WING DOMESTIC TERRORI....

    Oh, wait.

    Nevermind.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

  • Hyperion||

    I was really disappointed by that video. I thought he was going to spray a deadly fire of death by popcorn from his 'assault' popper.

  • Hyperion||

    Also, you'll shoot your eye out.

  • BuSab Agent||

    You're one of my cousins aren't you.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    Could be. Is your dad a Rasta?

  • BuSab Agent||

    No, but one of my uncles is.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    Hey...you never know.

  • BuSab Agent||

    I'll just leave THIS here, since it brings back nice family reunion memories.

  • Hyperion||

    I remember one time, many moons ago, when we were down at my grandfathers place in KY.

    My son was about 7 or 8 years old and he had this horseshoe throwing it up in the air, straight up, as far as he could. I had just told him to stop it, when I turned around to look the other way and heard this thud, followed by my son squealing at the top of his lungs. Of course the damn horseshoe smacked him right in the head like I knew it was going to.

    I guess it's a good thing that he wasn't firing 50 lb. anvils up into the air.

  • BuSab Agent||

    That there was a Valuable Life Lesson. My son once did the same with a rock and then later with an arrow (not the brightest of my children).It is my firm belief that common sense is made of just such lessons as these. So few people now seem to have common sense, because their overprotective parents impede the following lessons: gravity works, fire is hot, recoil can break your (shoulder, arm, nose etc), the ground is hard, alcohol does not confer super powers,and being close to explosions is a really bad idea.

  • BuSab Agent||

    Oh I forgot the most valuable of the Valuable Life Lessons: a rabbit shot with a 12 gauge loaded with buck shot makes a hell of a mess.

  • Hyperion||

    So few people now seem to have common sense, because their overprotective parents impede the following lessons

    You sure are right about that.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    Actually, the most valuable life lesson is there is a difference between a woman with a big ass and a big-ass woman.

  • Hyperion||

    The latter are the ones with size 13 shoes, that you run away from

    Big Assawoman Bay

  • BuSab Agent||

    Actually, the most valuable life lesson is there is a difference between a woman with a big ass and a big-ass woman.

    I try to keep away from my aunts as much as possible...they fill either/both categories.

  • ||

    Libertarian is Anarchy's version of government

    WTF does that even mean?

    I'm going to need a new desk soon. The next one will be solid oak or mahogany.

  • BuSab Agent||

    You like concussions?

  • Hyperion||

    I'm going to need a new desk soon. The next one will be solid oak or mahogany

    I bought a solid cherry desk back about 10 years ago, it was probably made in the 1950s, from a company that I used to work for when they decided to put most of the office people in cubicles. $25. The top probably weighs about 100 lbs., it's freaking huge.

    My wife hates it because it takes up so much room in our little office that also serves as a 2nd guest bedroom, but I'm not getting rid of it.

    WTF does that even mean?

    It means, stupid liberal has no idea what a Libertarian is. Hell, they don't even know what liberal means.

  • Mr Whipple||

    I should blow his mind and tell him I am a libertarian anarchist.

    Oh wait.....he doesn't have a mind.

  • waaminn||

    OK now you have got to admit dude thats some messed up stuff man, for real!

    www.Go4Anon.tk

  • BuSab Agent||

    Pedo-bot has spoken. So mote it be.

  • Mr Whipple||

  • Tulpa (LAOL-PA)||

    My letter to Pat Toomey regarding the AWB.

    Also, it'll probably piss off dunphy and a few others, but dig this inciteful [sic] article on sheeple at Zero Hedge.

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