- Don't miss the Obama-Christie Disaster Tour 2012. You'll be blown away as they personally restore your power (and clean out your fridge.)
- Obama is leading in New Hampshire, Iowa and Wisconsin, say the latest polls. No, we have no idea what to expect next Tuesday, either.
- Hillary Clinton says the U.S. has detailed plans for building a brighter, shinier Syria. What could go wrong?
- Turkey is in talks about joining the European Union. Don't see how that works out well for Istanbul, unless the Turks really want to subsidize Greece's bad habits.
- Want to stop driving? Tough! California officials say, Take your driver's license, it's good for you! At least, they keep renewing the license of a legally blind man who thinks that's a bit screwy.
- U.S. officials are asking their Israeli counterparts to please not bomb the hell out of Iran, since that would make matters rather dicey for us in the region.
- Governor Jerry Brown is begging his constituents to approve Prop. 30 and send him more money, which polls suggest they're not inclined to do.
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