Maine Bravely Protects Children from the Scourge of Adult Wine-Tasting

The Maine Public Broadcasting Network reports on a very silly law regulating wine tastings in order to remove "the possibility of observation by children." Only now even the law's sponsor says it goes too far:

"Inadvertantly, by the way that Public Safety is interpreting the law, the small specialty wine and cheese shops that were supposed to be omitted from this wound up being included," says state Rep. David Webster of Freeport.

Webster says the orginal bill allows not only wine tasting, but beer and liquor samplings at retail locations, including grocery stores. He says he worked with others, including a representative of the beverage industry, to craft an amendment aimed only at the grocery stores.

"And you know my feeling was if parents decide that they want to go to a wine tasting in a specialty store and they have a two-year-old or infant in a stroller, that's their choice, it's their children, you know?  But when families go into grocery stores and they don't want their children exposed to that they have a right to that too, and so that's what we were trying to do."

Whole story here.

[Via Overlawyered]

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  • ||

    When did the Mainers turn into such twatwaffles?

  • Tomcat1066||

    "But when families go into grocery stores and they don't want their children exposed to that they have a right to that too, and so that's what we were trying to do."

    Fucking Hell! It's someone drinking a liquid that's not a bodily fluid. How about someone in Maine grow a pair of fucking balls and tell people to get their stop getting their puritan panties in a bunch over someone tasting a beer.

    I fucking hate people.

  • Art-P.O.G.||

    Also, what infant or 2-year-old is even going to understand (have any real concept of) what she's looking at if she sees some adults sampling wine? WTF?

  • ||

    But when families go into grocery stores and they don't want their children exposed to that they have a right to that too, and so that's what we were trying to do.

    This is the brilliance of the federal system. If you want to live in a state that recognizes the inalienable right to go to a grocery store without your children witnessing other people sampling wine, you can move to Utah.

  • Invisible Finger||

    what infant or 2-year-old is even going to understand (have any real concept of) what she's looking at if she sees some adults sampling wine?

    It's not to protect the children, it's to buy the votes of the shit-for-brains parents of the children.

  • ||

    You know, it's not unheard of for parents to have a glass of wine or beer at a restaurant when their kids are with them, and because of the nature of table arrangements at restaurants, other people's kids might see them drinking. Oh, the horror!

    The only detriments to society are government and religion.

  • ||

    What has been seen cannot be unseen!

  • ||

    I fucking hate people.

    Agreed.

  • Art-P.O.G.||

    Invisible Finger,

    True. I'd never imagine such a cheap pander to overprotective parents, though.

  • Hobo Chang Ba||

    "But when families go into grocery stores and they don't want their children exposed to that they have a right to that too, and so that's what we were trying to do."

    Yeah - families have a right not to shop in that grocery store or not to take their kids with them when they go shopping - even to protest and organize boycotts if they like - but they don't have a right to force by law companies to not do things they simply don't like. If they assert that parents have rights over businesses to prevent their childrens' exposure to the alcohol consumption of legal adults (regardless of if it is a grocery store or a restaurant or a specialty store), that implies the right to sue a patron who consumes alcohol or an owner of a restaurant which serves alcohol for violating their legal rights as parents.

    Frankly, I'm surprised they haven't started censoring the word "Condom" out of "Condominium" yet. It might make my children want to have sex before marriage next time we drive past.

  • kinnath||

    too many representatives with too much free time . . . . .

  • ||

    I fucking hate people.

    Agreed. And, an awesome name for a blog.

  • ||

    Holy shit, seriously? At first I thought they had some loophole that allowed kids to sample. They don't want kids to see adults sample alcohol? Wow, am I glad I live in Missouri, where the laws haven't been written by certifiable lunatics.

  • Tomcat1066||

    Actually, now that you meantion it, it is a good name for a blog.

    I might have to start it up later :D

  • ||

    The infantilization of America is nearly complete.
    I would have thought the right of over-protective parents to cocoon their children would end at my right to sample a beverage before making my purchase, but I guess other people's children trump all.

  • creech||

    "My God, Sarah, our precious little princess should not have to see Oscar Mayer bacon being sampled at the supermarket."

    "Thor, I don't want little Ragnar, to see those Holy Bibles they have on the shelf at Borders."

    "Dammit, Dagny, those mooching Girl Scouts selling cookies outside Walmart have little Ayn all confused about the virtues of selfishness."

  • Cliché Bandit||

    aelhues,

    The laws may not be written by lunatics in MO (a debatable point) but then again some of your elected officials are actually DEAD!

    vote early and vote often

  • emmajane||

    "Frankly, I'm surprised they haven't started censoring the word "Condom" out of "Condominium" yet. It might make my children want to have sex before marriage next time we drive past."

    Excellent. don't give them any ideas!

  • Clcihé Bandit||

    On the other hand, by electing dead people Missouri may be onto something. Then again Ashcroft was made the damn Attorney General so I guess it is a matter of perspective.

  • ||

    My children saw people buying and eating murdered animal flesh! You'll pay, all of you!

  • ||

    So if I take my kids to Bizarre Bazaar....

  • Joe M||

    They probably need to outlaw birth, since newborns shouldn't have to be subjected to seeing their mothers' genitals.

  • Zeb||

    It sounds like the people who wrote/promoted this bill are trying to do the same thing to alcohol that has been done to tobacco, i.e. to make it a shameful thing to be hidden from sight and frowned upon by decent people. The idea is that simply seeing other people enjoying wine or beer will send the wrong message and lead your idiot spawn down the road to inevitable alcoholism.

  • JB||

    Abortion...it's for the children, the legislators, and all sorts of stupid fetuses.

  • ||

    About Rep. Webster

    David is a Freeport resident with his wife of 25 years, Nancy Salmon. He is a graduate of Antioch University New England with a Masters in Education - Organization and Management and is an alumnus of Maine's Institute for Civic Leadership

    http://www.maine.gov/legis/housedems/dwebster/


    jeez, what else do you expect from a guy who went to school to be a bureaucrat?
    it's good to know some people put so much effort in to becoming leeches

  • Tomcat1066||

    The idea is that simply seeing other people enjoying wine or beer will send the wrong message and lead your idiot spawn down the road to inevitable alcoholism.

    It's not just that. Because alcohol is a "gateway drug", a child witnessing a wine tasting will inevitably end up strung out on heroine and crack within two weeks of the viewing.

  • ||

    """ But when families go into grocery stores and they don't want their children exposed to that they have a right to that too, and so that's what we were trying to do."""

    People with children do not have a right to control public view.

    No wonder they are getting gays out of the closet, they are making room for the drinkers.

  • ||

    It's stories like this that make me want to start smoking and gain more weight to hasten the end. At least I'll be doing something enjoyable and the road to the Reaper. Screw the blood pressure meds. The thought of living to 70 or beyond in a world where this is common is more frightening than croaking of a quick cardiac next year at 51.

  • ||

    "And you know my feeling was if parents decide that they want to go to a wine tasting in a specialty store and they have a two-year-old or infant in a stroller, that's their choice, it's their children, you know? But when families go into grocery stores and they don't want their children exposed to that they have a right to that too, and so that's what we were trying to do."

    Oh, their MY children? Well, thank you very fucking much.

    Here's a thought for you, how about I worry about my kids, and you worry about yours. If the grocery store that you frequent has wine tastings (if ONLY I could get that in MD) that you object to, well, I bet there's ANOTHER grocery store close by that you could try instead.

    Whaddya think? Free choice good enough for you? How about adult supervision? For you, I mean, not the kids.

  • ||

    Quiz time!

    Q: Is Maine a "red" or a "blue" state?

    Q: Is Maine conservative or liberal?

    Q: Is there such a thing as a liberaltarian?

  • ||

    This reminds me that I let my 9-year old son taste my Dogfish 60-minute ale over the weekend. He didn't like the taste that much, well, not at all, and the face he made was priceless.

    But he thought it was really fucking cool. We're not going to burden mom with such knowledge.

  • Joe M||

    Dogfish Head 60 minute is NASTY. The 90 minute is where it's at.

  • Me. native||

    **When did the Mainers turn into such twatwaffles?**

    It's been a slow, steady regression over my 35 years. The taxes are high; the women are (usually) fat, ugly, and stoopid; summer starts in the middle of July and ends in late August. Other than that, it's great!

    The sad thing about this story: we have a couple of half-decent micro-breweries here, and the state apparently want the tourists NOT to sample our local product.

  • Russ 2000||

    Relax everybody. It's Maine. The law won't have any teeth in it.

  • Gunboat Diplomacy||

    My father began letting me drink beer at the age of 5 (at least that's my earliest recollection). It was just a little bit (about an ounce). The older we got the larger the amount, so that by the time we were 16, he'd let us drink an entire bottle on a hot summer day. I am now in my fifties and continue drink responsibly.

    Thanks Dad!

  • ||

    Dogfish Head 60 minute is NASTY.

    It's OK, not one of my favorites. But, I didn't want to him to have a summer ale or such for his first sip. Keep it on the bitter side so he won't think to try again for a while.

  • ||

    I am now in my fifties and continue drink responsibly.

    My philosophy as well. I'll probably start doing wine with dinner when he's 13 or so.

  • Gunboat Diplomacy||

    "My philosophy as well. I'll probably start doing wine with dinner when he's 13 or so."

    I'm told that in Europe, they dilute the wine with a water at first. Probably a good idea.

  • ||

    I am now in my fifties and continue drink responsibly.

    I like to compare it to guns. My wife grew up in northern Michigan where guns are commonplace. Do they hide the guns from kids until they're 21 and then tell them to run out into the woods and go nuts? Of course not. They grow up around them, see others use them responsibly, and learn how to use them safely. Seems like a logical approach to alcohol as well. Of course, my three-year-old daughter likes to hang out with me while I brew in the garage, so I guess I'm a little biased.

  • congressional staffer||

    They probably need to outlaw birth, since newborns shouldn't have to be subjected to seeing their mothers' genitals.

    That is idiotic. The human race would die out!

    We'll just mandate c-section deliveries instead.

  • ||


    My father began letting me drink beer at the age of 5 (at least that's my earliest recollection). It was just a little bit (about an ounce). The older we got the larger the amount, so that by the time we were 16, he'd let us drink an entire bottle on a hot summer day. I am now in my fifties and continue drink responsibly.



    my dad taught me how to drink and bribe the cops down in agua prieta when i was 16...

    we took the rotor out of the distributor cap so the truck would not get stolen. later when we were done partyin we were putting it all back together about 4:00 am. a cop approached and started the shake down, wanted to "search the truck". dad had two sawed offs in the truck and he paid the cop $50 not to search it. i've had to bribe my way out of trouble down there since then, but i don't go anymore. even before i moved away, it was just getting too dangerous across the line...

  • Rick H.||

    "Inadvertantly, by the way that Public Safety is interpreting the law, the small specialty wine and cheese shops that were supposed to be omitted from this wound up being included," says state Rep. David Webster of Freeport.

    Oops! Well, who could have anticipated a law having real-world effects that weren't part of Rep. Webster's imagination? Here's what we do: Write some more laws to exempt certain businesses and punish others. Problem solved.

  • B||

    People have a RIGHT to not see someone sample wine or beer at a grocery store? Seriously, this man's conception of what constitutes a right in the American political tradition is seriously fucked up. Furthermore, how is it that idiots like this get elected in the first place? I don't know who is worse, the fucker who pushed the law or the ignorant fucks who actually put him in the position of authority to do what he has done.

  • ||

    Whaddya think? Free choice good enough for you?

    Well of course it's not good enough for me, you idiot. Why the fuck would I have taken the trouble to introduce legislation if I wanted to leave things to free choice? When people get free choice, they often choose things I don't like.

  • BakedPenguin||

    Maine was once part of Massachusetts. I don't know why they separated.

  • ||


    Maine was once part of Massachusetts. I don't know why they separated.


    irreconcilable differences according to the tabloids...

  • ||

    One thing I don't get is - is anyone actually complaining about this?

    It there some retard fanatic anti-alcohol mujahedeen parents group going around to specialty cheese stores and reporting them for having wine tastings, or are there just a bunch of overzealous regulators with too much time on their hands?

    I can well imagine some screaming hissy fit going on with a hysterical mormon at city hall demanding such legislation, but I have trouble imagining said lunatic actually mking a point of canvassing local grocers to make sure they are obeying it. One would think this kind of thing might be put on the books to mollify morons, but left unenforced in practice.

    If there's really an American analogue for the Taliban, it's these assholes.

    Laskar-e-Children

  • Dylboz||

    These stupid bureaucrats have no idea what a right actually is. That quote was headache inducing. Parents have a "right" that their kids not see other adults consume a free sample of beer? What an idiot.

  • Benito Obama||

    "it's their children, you know?"

    No, they belong to The State. I said so.

  • The Libertarian Guy||

    My kid, when he was fifteen, hung out with some friends who had managed to get a bottle of Southern Comfort.

    After puking his socks off, all I said was "You learned something, didn't you?", instead of yelling at him.

    He hasn't drank since.

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