Michael Phelps...remember him?
He's almost 24 and has seven world records. This guy
won more medals than any other Olympian (16) and half of those at a
single Olympics, which is a record that hadn't been broken since
1972. He was the Sports Illustrated's Sportsman of the
Year. He was the spokesman for Rosetta
Stone . He was on the Wheeties
box! He was snapped taking a bong hit at a
party. Then he was suspended from competitive swimming for three
Here's what Phelps said at the practice pool yesterday:
"It was a stupid mistake that I made....But I'll have what I've accomplished in and out of the pool for the rest of my life. I'm satisfied with what I've done and happy with what I've done."
I take it back. I don't apologize.
Because you know what? It's none of your goddamned business....If during my brief window of down time I want to relax, enjoy myself, and partake of a substance that's a hell of a lot less bad for me than alcohol, tobacco, or, frankly, most of the prescription drugs most of you are taking, well, you can spare me the lecture.