Katherine Mangu-Ward | March 12, 2008
It turns out that rainbows taste bitter.
Or at least they do to the Connecticut eighth-grade honor student who was barred from an honors dinner and stripped him of his post as class Vice President after getting caught with a bag of contraband Skittles, bought from another student.
"It's too much. It's too unfair," [the student's mother] Shelli Sheridan said. "He's never even had a detention."
Purchase of the tasty fruit-flavored candy is apparently a violation of the school's Wellness Policy, which bans candy fundraisers, bake sales, and junk food in vending machines.
Via the Center for Consumer Freedom
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I'm sure that the lunch room only features salads and turkey
breast without the skin.
Are fruit snacks banned?
damn these kids and their love of sugar.
Of course, they say skittles are a gateway candy, leading to harder
stuff like ringpops, dippinstix and god forbid, mountain dew.
This hasn't gone too far until a principal demands that a student be strip searched in an effort to find contraband tootsie rolls.
It's times like this I'm glad I live in Connec...oh shit.
School administrators have always been either totally incompetent
and unable to control the students, or petty tyrants.
The petty tyrants must love these policies.
Glad the days of saving my lunch money for weed and grubbing change for ice cream bars are behind me. I might not have graduated on time.
They now have Chocolate Skittles. I've bought a bag, but I
haven't been brave enough to open it yet.
review
Also: "No slippery slope here! Move along, folks."
School administrators have always been either totally
incompetent and unable to control the students, or petty
tyrants.
In my experience, that goes for anyone with responsibility for that
eternal pie-in-the-sky, the good behavior of children.
If the adult employees of the school system eat sweets at home, are they guilty of moral terpitude?
Broben may I add to your rant:
Let us pray:
JESUS FUCKIN TAPDANCING CHRIST ON A
CRACKER!
For Chrissakes, geez...
This story makes me think about the scene in Caddyshack where
the Bill Murray groundskeeper character chows down on a Baby Ruth
candy bar.
/Everyone thinks it's a deuce.
//comedy gold!!11one111
strip searched in an effort to find contraband tootsie
rolls
I believe that would fall under the category of "body cavity
search".
Epsiarch
School administrators have always been either totally incompetent
and unable to control the students, or petty tyrants.
I'm not sure that the categories are mutually exclusive.
In this case, I think, after the revolution, the appropriate method
of executing the administrators would not be the guillotine. I
favor smothering in artificial strawberry flavored
marshmallows.
What happened to "I hope you brought enough for
everybody"?
You know, the worst thing that happened to Spicoli is that the rest
of the class ate his pizza.
Mr. Hand is now a fucking little pussy boy who robs kids of their
candy.
who robs kids of their candy
"With the sun-blocker in place and the town aghast, I was on top of
the world. So I wanted to kick up my heels and indulge my sweet
tooth. Smithers had thwarted my earlier attempt to take candy from
a baby, but with him out of the picture, I was free to wallow in my
own corpulence. But the old axiom was misleading: taking the candy
proved exceedingly difficult."
squarooticus,
I've always heard it as "crepulance" so I've always assumed it was
corpulence (which makes sense in context) mispronounced. Could be
the other way, though. [shrug]
Ha! This reminds me of Basic Training, when we weren't allowed
to have any candy, gum, tobacco, etc. I remember the drill
sergeants found out some guys were smuggling the stuff. Phase
banner rolled up. So many push-ups and moving sandbags.
But, uh...I only had to go 10 weeks without candy (I only made it
about 7 if you catch my drift). This policy is just ridiculous.
There's probably good money to be made as a candy pusher in CT. Black markets rule!
So what Jefferson was saying was "Hey! You know, we left this
England place because it was bogus. So if we don't get some cool
rules ourselves, pronto, we'll just be bogus too."
Sean Penn at his best.
"Ha! This reminds me of Basic Training, when we weren't
allowed to have any candy, gum, tobacco, etc. I remember the drill
sergeants found out some guys were smuggling the stuff. Phase
banner rolled up. So many push-ups and moving sandbags."
When I was going through BCT in 1979 at Fort "Lost in the Woods"
(Leonard Wood) we got smoke 'em if you got 'em breaks. That was the
only fun thing you could do with a 10 minute break, now it's no
more.
/I used Copenhagen and never got caught dipping in formation, yay
nicotine, a soldier's best friend.
It was crapulence.
As in, this policy is a great big pile of crapulence. I remember
selling M&Ms for an English class trip to the
Niagara--on-the-Lake Shakespeare festival and everyone was eating
them during class. Teacher, too.
What do you want to bet that Principal Eleanor Turner and school spokeswoman Catherine Sullivan DeCarlo are BOTH FAT!
Hate to bring other, straight-from-the-headlines kind of issues
into the mix, but: it's okay if it's freely given and partaken in,
but it's somehow a horrible crime if it's bought and sold?
"Wellness" indeed. Just not in the head.
Shouldn't freedom be a necessary component of "wellness?" If I'm
not free, than I'm not truly well. I might think I'm well, thanks
to the spurious efforts of the parental state, but I'm not truly
well.
Would we consider Neo "well" before he took the red pill?
Okay, all of you adults here today in this hisgh school, if you
are not here showing a kid how to normalize a vector
or correctly use the past tense verb forms in conversation, get the
fuck out. That's rights, assistant principle, secretary to the
assistant principle, vice principle of thumb tweedling, guidance
counselor of reeducation, affirmative action director, diversity
studies coordinator, officer in charge of drug prevention, lady
here from D.A.R.E., on site union rep, get the fuck out.
Lunch ladies and custodian, you can stay.
zigzag, my brother went to basic at Ft. Leonard Wood (I went to
Fort Sill).
These days you have anti-tobacco ads on AFN and everything.
'Course, you're right, nicotine is still a lot of soldiers' best
friend (mine is caffeine).
today in this hisgh school
Oh, and teacher's assistant with the concentration in spelling
related problems, you ought to stay too.
Skittles are ghastly and should be banned.
That said, out here in the great state of Californicate it is
illegal to bring any home baked goodies to school for birthday
celebrations, fund raisers, or events. It is also illegal to
provide kids with cookies but not Jello Puddin'.
More: Although I think it is insane to beat this poor kid into the
dirt for buying a bag of Skittles, I don't care if they ban all
sweets, sodas, and even the cafeteria from public schools.
Why, exactly, is it the school's job to provide lunch and snack
services. I thought the school's job was to educate.
On the flip side, my boy is looking forward to Jr High because they
sell Pizza Hit pizza and Panda Express Orange Chicken on
campus.
anti-tobacco ads
At my kid's elementary school there are two-foot square signs about
twenty feet apart on the chain-link fence surrounding the school
that declare:
THIS IS A TOBACCO FREE SCHOOL
I once thanked the principal for not allowing my second-grader to
light up after lunch.
She was not only unamused, I actually think she didn't get it.
TWC, that reminds me of "drug free zones". Theres a big sign on my street that informs everyone my neighborhood is a "drug free zone". Isn't EVERYWHERE supposed to be a drug free zone? You know, since they're illegal?
Panda Express Orange Chicken
Panda Express Orange chicken is so good it couldn't possibly be
healthy. I haven't had it in about 2 1/2-4 1/2 years and I kind of
miss it.
At my kid's elementary school there are two-foot square
signs about twenty feet apart on the chain-link fence surrounding
the school that declare:
THIS IS A TOBACCO FREE SCHOOL
When I was in HS the school provided outdoor smoking areas for the
students. Good idea or not, it kept smoking out of the
bathrooms.
Skittles are ghastly and should be banned.
Wrong. I pay good money for dental work that allows me to continue
enjoying those things.
More: In California they put signs up at the front desks of hotels
warning that the air is toxic. Why? Because some of the rooms allow
smoking.
I don't really see how the state can compel your presence somewhere, and then devise rules allowing them to confiscate your property if you actually show up there.
My HS had designated smoking restrooms (one each for males and
females). Good for smokers, and for non-smokers who could use the
other restrooms.
And once we turned 18, we could sign ourselves out of school at
will.
Memories...
Original story from
The New Haven Register
Turner had repeatedly warned students that she would not allow any candy to be sold in schools, nor did she want money changing hands in school, said Sullivan-DeCarlo. She said it was her understanding that the student was suspended for insubordination, which is what the district considered the candy exchange.
Aside from the nutrition issue, Sullivan-DeCarlo maintained the money students carry presents a security concern.
10 points for nanny-statism, 10 points for anti-capitalism and 10
more for security theater. Flip over the cards, Garry!
Kevin
"""I thought the school's job was to educate."""
I'm sure the experience was educating, but I don't think that's
what you had in mind.
Obviously the answer here is to continue to sell candy, but only
to accept PayPal.
That transaction takes place officially at Ebay HQ, so the school
would have no jurisdiction. You wouldn't be "selling" candy at the
school, you'd be "delivering" candy at the school, or perhaps
"returning candy to its rightful owner" at the school.
WC,
"I once thanked the principal for not allowing my second-grader to
light up after lunch.
She was not only unamused, I actually think she didn't get
it."
Perhaps if you had thanked her for not allowing your second-grader
to light up after sex in the janitor's closet...naw, that would
just bring in CPS.
nor did she want money changing hands in school,
I don't want money changing hands in schools, either. It always
seems to change from my hand, into the pocket of a highly paid
(most often more than I will ever make) teacher.
According to the BLS, the average public school teacher in the United States earned $34.06 per hour in 2005.
The average public school teacher was paid 36% more per hour than the average non-sales white-collar worker and 11% more than the average professional specialty and technical worker.
Full-time public school teachers work on average 36.5 hours per week during weeks that they are working. By comparison, white-collar workers (excluding sales) work 39.4 hours, and professional specialty and technical workers work 39.0 hours per week. Private school teachers work 38.3 hours per week.
Compared with public school teachers, editors and reporters earn 24% less; architects, 11% less; psychologists, 9% less; chemists, 5% less; mechanical engineers, 6% less; and economists, 1% less.
Compared with public school teachers, airplane pilots earn 186% more; physicians, 80% more; lawyers, 49% more; nuclear engineers, 17% more; actuaries, 9% more; and physicists, 3% more.
Public school teachers are paid 61% more per hour than private school teachers, on average nationwide.
My daughter's public school teacher just got back from a rousing
three-week vacation in Paris. Enough money is changing hands in the
schools.
He should have ratted out his dealer in exchange for a reduced
sentence.
Also, SugarFree, Chocolate Skittles are shit.
My daughter's public school teacher just got back from a
rousing three-week vacation in Paris.
Jeebus! At these exchange rates?
He has probably learned a more valuable lesson than anything he'll get in the classroom. Another future libertarian, I'd say.
I don't really see how the state can compel your presence somewhere, and then devise rules allowing them to confiscate your property if you actually show up there.
Fluff, please throw away your antiquated notions of property and
self-determination. This is America bitch.
I know the school, I have a relative who goes there. It's a very
strict school, since it's basically in the ghetto and they have a
lot of security concerns.
That said, it's a prestigious magnet school with a lot of smart
kids let in from all over the area. Part of the way they keep it
that way is by suspending/expelling kids for minor infractions so
that the suburban parents feel safe about their kids going
there.
"When I was in HS the school provided outdoor smoking areas
for the students. Good idea or not, it kept smoking out of the
bathrooms."
Ah, the smokers' patio. High school students from 10-12th grade
responsibly enjoying a legal product. Who would have think
it?
/turned 18 as a Junior in HS, drinking age in Texas 18
//drinking age raised to 19 a year later.
///yay being a teenager and legal to drink.
turned 18 as a Junior in HS, drinking age in Texas
18
Ditto in Michigan. Amazingly enough, I waited until 17 to get drunk
the first time, even though I had classmates who could legally buy
it prior to that.
How's about we bring back Tag and Dodgeball and PE and let the
kids eat whatever the hell they want?
Alternatively, I hope the kid's parents take him to CostCo, stock
up on candy and let him open his own black market business.
Doesn't the school have a school supply store? I know they're
not giving away pens and notebooks for free...
Paul,
What's the "BLS"? I'm highly suspicious of those figures. If
teaching is so lucrative, why aren't more people doing it, instead
of leaving it in droves?
hey, this shit doesn't just happen at public schools. the daughter of a friend, who, at the time, was top student in her class (junior in hs), was expelled from school because she had a photo posted on facebook of herself at a college dorm party she attended with her older sister in which a person in the background could be seen drinking a beer. she was on spring break and hundreds of miles away from campus. this private hs has a zero-tolerance alcohol ban which was, via this photo, deemed to have been violated.
If teaching is so lucrative, why aren't more people doing
it, instead of leaving it in droves?
Two words: kids today.
Teaching is hard. I suspect, at least, that people who've
overcome learning disabilities are more passionate teachers than
people who are, say, gifted at rote memorization.
I've had some great teachers and they all happened to seem a bit
idiosyncratic.
Administration is hard for me to really comment on.
My daughter's public school teacher just got back from a
rousing three-week vacation in Paris. Enough money is changing
hands in the schools.
Nicely done. The administrators at my kidz elementary school drive
Lexus', Beemers, and MBZ's. We know because they have their own
labeled parking. Ain't a car in that entire lot older than three
years. Except that one teacher has a cherry '55 Chevy.
I always wondered if green Skittles make you horny like green
M&M's do. Maybe that's the real reason they're banned.
Panda Express Orange chicken is so good it couldn't possibly be healthy.
My kid would eat it for every meal. Unless you offered him hot
wings.
Dello, you are a sick one. :-)
J Sub, there were a lot of schools that had smoking areas for the
students. Not ours. It was a suspendable offense. Now it's
automatic expulsion.
Paul,
Do you have the sourcing for that? I remember those stats from
somewhere, but the "public school teachers are underpaid"
assumption is so integrated into most peoples minds that unless you
give them a cite they won't believe you.
Rhywun,
BLS is Bureau of Labor Statistics. It's per hour, so the summer
break and relatively low on-clock hours of teaching probably
account for a lot of it. Teachers like to make a big deal of their
off-clock obligations, but I'd also point out that other salaried
jobs frequently have off-clock obligations too - mine used to
require that I spent a week or two on-call 24-hrs a day (and at the
time I was making about half that average cited per hour) and I'm
still expected to come in nights and weekends on request and keep
up on training on my own time, and this is in a job with a 45-hr/wk
on-clock baseline.
Teaching has a high washout rate, but so do a lot of other
occupations, even very lucrative ones like consulting, but I'd
attribute it largely to stress and the experience-driven pay scales
that make getting out early if you're not sure you want to stick
around more attractive.
For everyone aksing me for my source:
What's the "BLS"? I'm highly suspicious of those figures. If
teaching is so lucrative, why aren't more people doing it, instead
of leaving it in droves?
Sorry, I didn't provide the link, and I'm about to go bye-bye, but
it's the Bureau of Labor Statistics.
Rhywun,
My guess is people are leaving it in droves for reasons other than
pay. The crushing bureaucracy may have something to do with
it.
FWIW, I believe those statistics to be accurate, because the
reflect well the few districts that I have direct knowledge of what
the payscales are. Had it been way higher than all the districts I
knew of, I probably would be suspicious too.
Fluffy:
"Obviously the answer here is to continue to sell candy, but only
to accept PayPal.
That transaction takes place officially at Ebay HQ, so the school
would have no jurisdiction. You wouldn't be "selling" candy at the
school, you'd be "delivering" candy at the school, or perhaps
"returning candy to its rightful owner" at the school."
Damn. Busted for delivery of a controlled substance.
I continue to be awestruck and dumbfounded that private and home schooling haven't caught on. Is it a marketing problem, or do parents really prefer mindless bureaucrats raising their children?
People are leaving teaching in droves because the baby boom
generation of teachers is reaching retirement age, and smart women
leaving college today have a much wider range of viable career
choices than they had in 1975.
It's similar to the reason we're hemorrhaging nurses, even though
nurses have never been better compensated than they are now.
It's similar to the reason we're hemorrhaging nurses, even
though nurses have never been better compensated than they are
now.
No shit. Don't get me started on nurses.
Two words: kids today.
I don't doubt it. I look at the kids around me and there's no way
in hell I'd lock myself into a room with them for six to eight
hours a day.
Nevertheless I'm locked into the "teachers make crap" mindset you
mentioned. Perhaps the unions have done better for themselves than
I imagined. They sure have in other fields whose pay is more
publicized around here (e.g. subway workers).
I continue to be awestruck and dumbfounded that private and
home schooling haven't caught on.
I suspect that most people can't afford to pay both property taxes
and tuition, and even more lack the time and skills to
homeschool.
do parents really prefer mindless bureaucrats raising their
children?
Probably not, but a "free" babysitter sure takes the load off.
I don't doubt it. I look at the kids around me and there's
no way in hell I'd lock myself into a room with them for six to
eight hours a day.
Yeah, of all the school age children I'm familiar with, only two of
them don't make we want to throttle them within about 20 minutes of
exposure. I'm fortunate that the niece who lives with me is one of
those two.
All the bad pub has saved young Mr. Sheridan from the Blob's
wrath:
On Wednesday, public school officials agreed to expunge a one-day suspension for Michael Sheridan, an eighth-grader who was punished for buying a $1 bag of candy, against district policy, in Sheridan Communications and Technology Magnet School. The Skittles seller also had his record cleared. - The New Haven Register
The Blobocrats have fallen back to the line that the kid might
bring in something to which another student is allergic. So, are
students now banned from brown-bagging PB&J?
Kevin
Abdul
"This hasn't gone too far until a principal demands that a student
be strip searched in an effort to find contraband tootsie
rolls."
I laughed so hard I almost pooped myself
The Wine Commonsewer wrote: "my boy is looking forward to Jr
High because they sell Pizza Hit pizza"
Pizza Hit? Does this mean they've added a topping? They've upgraded
their so-called "Hawaiian" pizza to the "Maui Wowee Special" . .
?
The lesson being taught here is the same one taught in boot camp:
OBEY OR DIE. In combat, unquestioning obedience means survival. In
school, unquestioning obedience means the death of initiative --
which is what the schools really want.
They slug our kids up with whatever dope makes them sit there
quietly, so no wonder they don't want the kids to have any sugar to
wake them up!
Brandybuck wrote: "I continue to be awestruck and dumbfounded
that private and home schooling haven't caught on. Is it a
marketing problem, or do parents really prefer mindless bureaucrats
raising their children?"
Private and home schooling are expensive. Some states (like
Arizona, where I was when I homeschooled) require homeschoolers to
pass the SAME EXAMS that union teachers pass. The difference is
that union teachers can fail the exam two years running and still
be teaching, while homeschoolers can't.
This is why the unions are so dead-set against school vouchers,
which bring private and charter schools into affordability for a
lot of the peons who today are forced to send their kids to
substandard schools.
If I were this kid's parents, I would find a skilled lawyer and sue
the heck out of the school district -- then use some of that money
to put my kid into a private school!
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