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God Responds to Nebraska Legislator's Lawsuit
Last week, Nebraska state senator Ernie Chambers filed a lawsuit seeking a permanent injunction against The Most High Lord for
...making terroristic threats, inspiring fear and causing "widespread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of the Earth's inhabitants."
According the AP, the Deity has responded with a legal brief arguing that, among other things, Nebraska courts do not have jurisdiction over the Author of the Ten Commandments.
Perhaps Sen. Chambers should be glad that the Lord of Hosts has chosen to forgo the Sodom and Gomorah option in this matter.
AP story here.
UCrawford|9.21.07 @ 4:01PM|#
Is Chambers a libertarian? Because I saw this story yesterday and tried to find his voting record but there didn't seem to be a lot available. All I found were a lot of articles talking about how much most of Nebraska hated him enough to impose term limits.
|9.21.07 @ 4:03PM|#
Can we call Pat Robertson as a witness for the plaintiff? Or the defendant, it doesn't matter who, I just want him to testify about the actual nature of this "GOD" thing. Please, PLEASE, can we?
|9.21.07 @ 4:06PM|#
Chambers, a self-proclaimed agnostic who often criticizes
Christians, said his filing was triggered by a federal lawsuit he
considers frivolous.
So is there anybody on the record in favor of frivolous
lawsuits?
He said he's trying to make the point that anybody can sue
anybody.
Well, of course. Everybody is entitled to have the courts address a
grievance if they have one. That's a good thing, in my opinion.
Paul|9.21.07 @ 4:13PM|#
Is Chambers a libertarian?
Dunno, but God is:
"I created man and woman with free will and next to the promise
of immortal life, free will is my greatest gift to you,"
|9.21.07 @ 4:34PM|#
The second Jim Thompson novel--Heed The Thunder--has an attorney
doing the same thing (suing God) to make a name for himself as a
young politico on the make.
/Novel was set in Nebraska.
|9.21.07 @ 4:37PM|#
When GOD has to take the stand, where will he place his his hand during the oath?
Mad Max|9.21.07 @ 4:38PM|#
From the Book of Job (Douay-Rheims translation)
Chapter 38
1 Then the Lord answered Job out of a whirlwind, and said: 2 Who is
this that wrappeth up sentences in unskillful words? 3 Gird up thy
loins like a man: I will ask thee, and answer thou me. 4 Where wast
thou when I laid up the foundations of the earth? tell me if thou
hast understanding. 5 Who hath laid the measures thereof, if thou
knowest? or who hath stretched the line upon it? . . . 17 Have the
gates of death been opened to thee, and hast thou seen the darksome
doors? . . . 21 Didst thou know then that thou shouldst be born?
and didst thou know the number of thy days? . . .
Chapter 40
1 And the Lord answering Job out of the whirlwind, said: 2 Gird up
thy loins like a man: I will ask thee, and do thou tell me. 3 Wilt
thou make void my judgment: and condemn me, that thou mayst be
justified? . . .
|9.21.07 @ 4:50PM|#
Then the Lord answered Job out of a whirlwind, and
said:...
I don't know how it was in Job's day, but here in the 21st century,
we have a word for people who hear the words of GOD. And that word
is _____.
|9.21.07 @ 4:57PM|#
Places hand on Bible. "Do you swear to tell the whole truth so
help you, You?"
God: "I do." Hands Bible back to Judge. "Want that
autographed?"
Mike Laursen|9.21.07 @ 5:06PM|#
Yeah, my opinion of Nebraskans just jumped up about
500%
Is that your aggregate opinion? Ernie Chambers is not a typical
Nebraskan, to say the least.
|9.21.07 @ 5:08PM|#
Isn't the "frivolous lawsuit" he's protesting the civil suit against the judge who banned a woman from saying "rape" or "victim" in her sexual assault trial?
Mike Laursen|9.21.07 @ 5:11PM|#
Serious question (OK, I guess not that serious): Can a law firm claim to represent God, or anybody else for that matter, without producing some evidence that the person asked to be represented by them?
|9.21.07 @ 5:16PM|#
I absolutely DO NOT have "minimum contacts" with the State of Nebraska. Hell, I don't even know where Nebraska is.
Paul|9.21.07 @ 5:17PM|#
Can a law firm claim to represent God, or anybody else for
that matter, without producing some evidence that the person asked
to be represented by them?
Just ask to see their credentials.
|9.21.07 @ 5:17PM|#
Places hand on Bible. "Do you swear to tell the whole truth
so help you, You?"
God: "I do." Hands Bible back to Judge. "Want that
autographed?"
LOFL. We have a thread winner! Sixstring, come on up and accept
your prize.
The Wine Commonsewer|9.21.07 @ 5:34PM|#
Can a law firm claim to represent God, or anybody else for
that matter, without producing some evidence that the person asked
to be represented by them?
A better question: How do you serve the papers on God. Use a
Marshal? Sheriff? Certified Mail? Personal Service?
God obviously must have been served or the law firm could not
respond.
BTW, I gave Weigel this hot tip yesterday. [reaches around and
self-righteously pats hisself on the back]
|9.21.07 @ 5:38PM|#
A lawyer cannot legally simply show up and represent someone without being authorized to do so by the person being represented. However, a court will usually accept the lawyer's word that the lawyer is authorized. In Texas we have a procedure by which another party in the case can require the lawyer to prove authorization. I don't know for sure if Nebraska has such a procedure, but it probably does.
Deron|9.21.07 @ 5:38PM|#
A better question: How do you serve the papers on God. Use a
Marshal? Sheriff? Certified Mail? Personal Service?
Imagine the consternation in Rome, Israel, and Mecca when the
Marshal flew to Utah.
GOD|9.21.07 @ 5:40PM|#
"Hmmm... I always thought God would be a better speller."
I am infaliable, therefore how I spell a word is the proper way.
Webster is wrong.
The Wine Commonsewer|9.21.07 @ 5:46PM|#
Imagine the consternation in Rome, Israel, and Mecca when
the Marshal flew to Utah.
Nice, but Sixstring still wins. :-)
|9.21.07 @ 5:50PM|#
This Ernie Chambers character seems interesting. They call him the "angriest black man in Nebraska". Of course, its not like in Nebraska theres much competition for that title.
|9.21.07 @ 5:59PM|#
I think it's pretty cool Nebraska has an agnostic state
senator.
And the mo-fo is black! Yeah! Where are the white women at?
Mad Max|9.21.07 @ 6:08PM|#
"A lawyer cannot legally simply show up and represent someone
without being authorized to do so by the person being represented.
However, a court will usually accept the lawyer's word that the
lawyer is authorized. In Texas we have a procedure by which another
party in the case can require the lawyer to prove authorization. I
don't know for sure if Nebraska has such a procedure, but it
probably does."
God didn't even retain a lawyer when He was prosecuted on capital
charges. Why, then, would He retain a lawyer to respond to a
nuisance suit by some Nebraskan?
|9.21.07 @ 6:17PM|#
"I am infaliable..."
No, it's the Pope who is infallible. You are omnipotent. And a
lousy speller.
|9.21.07 @ 6:32PM|#
"I am infaliable..."
No, it's the Pope who is infallible. You are omnipotent. And a
lousy speller.
Sixstring, God really hates getting his ass handed to him in a
debate.
muchsarcasm|9.21.07 @ 6:56PM|#
In the end, someone is going to step forward and claim to be God. Then he's going to go to court and win when the post office dumps thousands of letters to God on the judge's desk. Then Natalie Wood gets a house.
M|9.21.07 @ 9:17PM|#
How do you serve the papers on God. Use a Marshal? Sheriff? Certified Mail? Personal Service?
Mapquest direx to defendant's office address hier. Realtor's
prospectus with eponymous bibliographical citation (first
paragraph, fifth sentence) hier.
God obviously must have been served or the law firm could not respond.
|9.21.07 @ 10:05PM|#
God is at a terrible disadvantage in this lawsuit. There are no lawyers in heaven, thus He's screwed when it comes to representation at the Douglas County courthouse
|9.21.07 @ 10:27PM|#
God needn't swear on the bible. Since He is identical with the
way, the truth and the light, His testimony, no matter what it is,
will be true by definition.
And after He took the stand, we'd have to canonize the stenographer
as His true prophet.
Ipi Tombi: Ha!
|9.22.07 @ 11:06AM|#
M Posted:
hier, hier, hier. Look at me, I'm so clever...
This was never amusing. Knock it off.
Sean Malone|9.22.07 @ 1:52PM|#
Ahh yes, as a former Nebraskan, I remember Senator Chambers
well. I even met the man several times while working at the
University of Nebraska Public Policy Center as a freshman in
college.
He is NOT a libertarian, by any means. He is a socialist - and the
reason you probably can't find much of a substantive voting record
is because he usually uses his time in legislature to grandstand
for some ridiculous waste of time (like suing God). From my
experience, he's kind of a nut, but he's pretty benign - other than
the socialism.
Mad Max|9.22.07 @ 2:41PM|#
Sean Malone,
What a remarkable coincidence - a guy who sues God happens to be a
nut.
|9.22.07 @ 3:59PM|#
Didn't this guy have to delcare, under oath, how he knows God did it? I think this guy committed prejury in his complaint.
|9.22.07 @ 5:10PM|#
Didn't this guy have to delcare, under oath, how he knows
God did it? I think this guy committed prejury in his
complaint.
Which brings us back to subpeonaing Pat Robertson as a witnss. He
KNOWSall about these God things. I just closed the
circle. (smugly smirks)
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