Politics

Did Nero Pass Laws Against Maple Syrup Knockoffs as Rome Burned?

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America's sweethearts, Sens. Patrick Leahy (D-Vt.) and Susan Collins (R-Maine), are working overtime to protect us all from so-called maple syrup that just ain't so. This bipartisan phlegmatic duo has gone so far to introduce a new felony into the U.S. criminal code. They even worked up a clever acronym for their proposed legislation:

The bill is called the Maple Agriculture Protection and Law Enforcement or MAPLE Act and if passed, would increase the punishment for selling imitation maple syrup to a five year maximum penalty.

Leahy gets it. And Mrs. Butterworth and Aunt Jemima, you're gonna get yours!

"I have been alarmed by the growing number of individuals and businesses claiming to sell Vermont maple syrup when they are in fact selling an inferior product that is not maple syrup at all," Leahy said….

More, including hilarious Pravda-style video "report" from CNN about the "labor of love" that is the Green Mountain State's maple syrup industry, here. 

I'm all for prosecuting fraud as it happens. So go get 'em tiger, when it comes to catching the bad guys and gals who are impugning Vermont's clean, crisp reputation. And then you know what? Go back to your day job and you and Collins should get like 58 of your best friends or whatever you need and pass a freaking budget already.

Hat tip: Mary Katherine Ham's Twitter feed.