Culture

Harry Potter and the Tattoo of Regret (A.K.A. "It seemed like a good idea at the time" Edition)

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Ernest Hemingway once said that all true stories end in death. In my experience, all tattoo stories end with the slowly sobering-up recipient opining, "It seemed like a good idea at the time."

The latest instance of this takes off from the recent revelation by Harry Potter creator J.K. Rowling that the esteemed headmaster of Hogwarts Academy, Albus Dumbledore, was in fact gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that, especially for a guy who really knew how to use his wand. But it has complicated at least one man's life.

From the U.K. Sun:

PROUD Paul Croft got a tattoo of Harry Potter wizard Albus Dumbledore on his back—but is now being teased by pals after he was outed as GAY.

Proud Paul, 36, spent a YEAR having the Hogwarts headmaster etched into his skin as a surprise for his five kids.

But the factory worker has been the butt of jokes ever since Harry Potter author JK Rowling revealed last week that Dumbledore was in love with a fellow male sorcerer.

Paul, of Nottingham, moaned yesterday: "It's been terrible. I've always liked Dumbledore—just not in that way.

"I went into work and everyone was sniggering….

"There were wisecracks about 'Watch your backs, lads.' Someone asked me if I was planning to get a tattoo of Graham Norton. I thought, 'Why me?' " The huge £500 tattoo shows Dumbledore holding a scroll bearing the names of his Harry Potter mad children—Charlotte, Deanna, Brandon, Tamzin and Paris.

Paul said: "It seemed like a good idea at the time."

More here. Note to fans of the movie series, the tatt is of the Richard Harris rendition of Dumbledore, which Croft thinks is the "original and best." Oddly, the Sun's reporters didn't think to ask about the George Lazenby Bond tattoo on his scrotum. Go figure.

Hat Tip: Reader Jim Bob tipped me two weeks ago about the Rowling revelation. I can't remember how I stumbled across the tattoo story itself.