British Libel Law Unbound: What does Elton get when he crosses a penis with a potato?

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Is this a man who would behave like "old-fashioned royalty?" London's High Court didn't think so either, and has ordered the Daily Mail to pay Sir Elton John £100,000 in libel damages for portraying the flamboyant Lestat composer as a "tinpot dictator" in its articles "Senora Spice Goes Flamenco" and "Speak only when you're spoken to, Sir Elton tells his party guests." The judge in the case notes that when Sir Elton complained about the articles, the Mail immediately apologized to the litigious performer and made no effort to substantiate its claims. Says Rocketman's lawyer:

"The articles falsely alleged that Sir Elton had issued a bizarre and absurd edict to guests invited to his annual charity fundraising White Tie and Tiara summer ball ordering them not to approach him during that event, thereby acting like old-fashioned royalty or some tinpot dictator and exhibiting self-important, arrogant and rude behaviour bordering on paranoia," said Nigel Tait, a solicitor-advocate for the star.

"In fact, not only was no such edict issued at all, Sir Elton greets each guest as they arrive and is well-known for chatting to as many people as possible who attend the ball, not least to thank them for helping him with his fundraising efforts."

Having vanquished the counter-revolutionaries, Tinpot Dictator Elton now appears to be consolidating his power, openly calling for paparazzi to be shot.