Alcohol

Have a Drink, Have a Heart Attack

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Until last week, the main hazard of caffeinated alcoholic beverages such as Joose, Torque, and Four Loko was supposed to be that they keep you alert even when you're drunk, so that you underestimate your inebriation and are more inclined to engage in risky behavior. But now, thanks to the faux-sober reporting of ABC News, we know you also might drop dead from a heart attack the first time you try one of these drinks, even if you're a strapping 19-year-old:

Two weeks ago, an athletic, otherwise perfectly healthy 19-year-old man arrived at the emergency room at Temple University Hospital in Philadelphia.

"He had chest pains, he was sweaty, short of breath," said Dr. Robert McNamara, who heads the department of emergency medicine.

The patient was suffering a heart attack.

Tests, however, showed the man had none of the usual signs of an unhealthy heart or arteries.

The symptoms were extremely unusual for such a young person, said McNamara, who added they're typically seen in people who overdose on cocaine or speed. After further questioning, the patient admitted he'd been drinking a new type of beverage, which is growing in popularity, which combines high alcohol content with a large dose of caffeine.

"That was the only explanation we had," for the heart attack, said Dr. McNamara….

"This is a dangerous product from what we've seen," Dr. McNamara said. "It doesn't have to be chronic use. I think it could happen to somebody on a first time use."

Yet by ABC's own account, a 23.5-ounce can of Four Loko has 156 milligrams of caffeine—as much as a cup and a half of (pretty weak) coffee. Ounce by ounce, in fact, Four Loko has less caffeine than coffee: 6.6 mg per ounce, compared to 8.3 mg per ounce for McDonald's coffee, around 18 mg per ounce for store-bought drip coffee, and 50 mg per ounce for espresso. I cannot recall an ABC News story about the heart-attack risk posed by a 16-ounce Starbucks Grande Latte, which has as much caffeine as a can of Four Loko (or, assuming the combination of caffeine and alcohol is especially hazardous to the heart, the public health threat posed by Irish coffee).

ABC is also worried about the alcoholic content of Four Loko. At 12 percent, it is about as strong as wine. But it sounds scarier if you say, as ABC does, that "you'd have to drink almost six cans of Bud Light beer, or 67.2 ounces, to get the same amount of alcohol" as you get from a can of Four Loko. In truth, though, drinking six cans of Bud Light (or even one) sounds scary in any context.

For those who are still not convinced that caffeinated alcoholic beverages pose an intolerable threat to the youth of America, here's more (emphasis added):

One New Jersey college banned the drinks this month after 23 students were hospitalized with alcohol-related problems. At least some of them reportedly drank Four Loko.

"There's no redeeming social purpose to be served by having the beverage," Ramapao College President Peter Mercer told The Associated Press.

No social purpose to a beverage that loosens you up while stimulating you? I suspect all those drunk-yet-alert college students would disagree.

As ABC notes (and as I noted here a year ago), the FDA seems poised to ban buzzy booze, arguing that it has never explicitly authorized the combination of alcohol with caffeine. Fortunately for partiers who like to get up while they get down, the FDA has no jurisdiction over cocktails that feature, say, vodka and Red Bull, which has 50 percent more caffeine than Four Loko. 

I'm surprised ABC failed to point out that caffeine also can make you strangle your wife. But it gets points for calling Four Loko and similar products "cocaine in a can"—not to be confused with Cocaine in a can, which thanks to the FDA no longer exists.

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176 responses to “Have a Drink, Have a Heart Attack

  1. Bush!

    1. In truth, though, drinking six cans of Bud Light (or even one) sounds scary in any context.

      So true.

      1. ahaha a cottonball sounds scarier than drinking a bud light. and we all know how scary cottonballs are!

    2. It’s got caffeine–SUPER EXTRA CAFFEINE–and FIVE KINDS OF SUGAR, which makes it DELICIOUS and much better than other energy drinks that are NOT DELICIOUS!

  2. Those stupid horse doctors might also consider that many young, healthy people have heart attacks and die from ventricular dysplasia and other types of congenital arrythmias. Instead of bashing these drinks this guy ought to be getting a second opinion and possibly suing these morons for malpractice.

    And just as a general rule: seriously, a doctor wants us to take “it’s the only explanation we have” as an answer? I mean, why bother to investigate the origins of the universe — I mean, Zeus is the ONLY explanation we have!!

    1. In my humble opinion “it’s the only explanation we have” is a gross failure on the doctors part to be a doctor. You can’t throw out the scientific method as a scientist and still be taken seriously.

      1. Sure you can. Just ask the IPCC how they did it.

      2. Doctor=/=scientist. Medical school does nothing to teach the scientific method. It makes you extremely good at remembering useless factiods though.

    2. Sounds like it would make a good episode of House, MD.

    3. Don’t you badmouth Zeus, you filthy zatheist!

  3. Look, Sullum. I grew up on Bud Light. Sometimes, I get a craving for it. No need to knock on me for it. This place has been going downhill since Postrel left . . .

    1. Look, pham, I grew up on water. Sometimes, I get a craving for it.

      1. Water? You mean that stuff in the toilet? WTF is wrong with you? Drink this!

        1. Bud Light? The stuff in the toilet?

          Try Prima Pils next time you get a craving for Bud Light. You’ll never go back again.

          1. Victory Beer? Try Troeggs Bros. they have a coffee stout that rocks. Also I mixed Dr. Pepper and tea at my desk right now. It’s awful. I’m going to drink it anyway, my heart will go on.

            1. I’ll have to try that, assuming it ships to IL.

              1. I’ll take Victory over Troeggs. Hell, I repeatedly do.

          2. Surly.

            It only goes into the toilet when you’re through with it.

            http://www.surlybrewing.com/

            1. Next time you go to Niagra Falls, just keep in mind that everyone in Buffalo has pissed in that water as you go for pics on the Maid of the Mist, or on the slippery scaffolding up to the cave of the Winds. Which isn’t really a fucking cave, anyway. Bastards and their stupid mandatory sippers.

              1. Everyone in Buffalo —
                And Cleveland and Detroit and Chicago and Milwaukee and Duluth and…

    2. You are a fucking animal. Bud Light? You might as well drink diarrhea.

      1. Sierra Nevada, Blue Moon, Sam Adams, Shocktop, Magic Hat, etc. I just sometimes want a bud light. Also, fuck you. Strong comment to follow.

        1. No Dogfish Head? You truly are an animal. You disgust me. Even more than NutraSweet, Warty, or even ProL.

          1. No Great Divide, Victory, or 3 Floyds either.

            Shame.

          2. you can get dogfish head in the pacific northwest?

            1. They had 2 beers at the Elysian Great Pumpkin fest.

            2. Uh…yes. Where can’t you get it?

              1. maybe utah, but that’s about it I suppose.

                1. You can get Dogfish Head in Utah. At the state liquor store, where it will be warm. And no, they don’t sell ice.

            3. For twenty bucks, those dogfish will do disgusting things.

              1. you can get dogfish head for 20 bucks? A case runs you at least 30 around here. More if you’re looking for something fancy.

                1. At the local distributor, Dogfish Head runs about $25/case for 60 and 90 Minute IPA, Raison d’Etre, Shelter Pale Ale, and Indian Brown Ale. The rarer brews start around $40 and run up to $100+ for stuff like 120 Minute IPA.

          3. Great Lakes.

            Also, Bell’s.

            1. Bell’s two hearted is such an awesome pale ale.

              1. It most certainly is.

                Great Lakes Oktoberfest and Christmas Ale = God’s gift to the end of the calendar.

                1. …and Nosferatu if you like hops and getting your ass kicked by a beer not by Stone.

          4. Dude. You can’t dogfish head down here! I live in that magnificient backwater known as Mississippi! Hell, just to get Fat Tire I gotta head north an hour to fucking Hattiesburg! Fuck that! I like my tiny bastion of civilization known as Biloxi! And Blue Moon is awesome! You are worse than Tulpa.

            1. We can get all kinds of crazy shit here in NE Ohio, yet Yuengling, of all things, is completely unavailable as far as I know. I mean, what the fuck! It’s just over the goddamn border!

              1. Sounds like time for some bootlegging.

            2. Wow, that really sucks.

              My suggestion is brew your own, or buy a big fridge and buy in bulk.

              Also, beer trades.

          5. Acknowledged.

        2. Sam Adams Oktoberfest is the shit. Spaten is even better.

          1. I’m partial to the Sam Adams Scotch Ale. Also the Arrgoant Bastard ale, but that’s hard to find retail.

            1. 1 week til Double Bastard.

          2. Wrong! That shit is awful in a bottle. Yeah, yeah. “Try it on tap”. If I could I would but I can’t therefore I have totally wrote it off. I’d rather just keep buying Stella Artois’s.

            1. What I like about that beer is that I can tear my shirt and yell “Stella!” at a bar and they know what I mean.

            2. What I like about that beer is how it makes me want to kill myself.

              Wait, that’s what I hate about Stella.

            3. Never had either in a bottle. I live in a beer-friendly city.

        3. Hate to be a dick but Blue Moon is Coors with wheat and Shocktop is Bud with wheat. They aren’t as awful as their parents but in the Belgian Wit category they are pretty awful.

          1. That is a disturbing number of Witbiers in that list of his/hers.

            1. Shitty Witbieren, no less.

              1. Yes, the distinction of them being shitty needed to be made.

                1. Holy Moses (another Great Lakes) is a good Wit.

            2. I like K?nig Ludwig Weissbier.

              1. Had their Weisssbier Dunkel recently. Very good.

                1. Yesss, my precious, Weisssbier Dunkel. We must haves it!

                  1. Do you like sour Flemish ales? I recently had Ommegang Zuur and it was fantastic. Bottle only though. Although I did have Kwak on draft at the same place, in the Kwak glass. Such a complex and formidable beer experience.

                    1. How about some love for North Coast? I love their Pranqster and Old Rasputin. I also recently had Founder’s Breakfast Stout. It was delicious.

      2. Do none of you beer snobs ever just drink cheap beer to quench a thirst? I like me some good beer, but when I’m doing yard work, I drink Milwaukee’s Best.
        Yeah, I said it. And fuck you, too.

        1. Lone Star

          1. Shiner’s as cheap as I’ll buy, but I will admit to once drinking free Lone Star when I was already drunk.

            1. Shiner Bock is awesome actually. Their black lager is terrific. And fuck you too, CN. You probably drink Natty Light as well.

        2. Another philistine shows his colors.

          No. I never, ever drink crap. I hate it. The crappiest thing I’ve had recently was Blue Moon.

        3. Have you ever mowed the lawn after a few Golden Monkeys? There is no experience quite like it.

        4. I’ve been known to drink PBR at parties, especially if it’s delivered in a funnel. I really dislike bud, coors, and miller, they just taste bad to me, but taste is a personal thing.

          I also used to pre-game with the ocassional four loko, because one will get me past buzzed but not wasted, for $3, and it’s not terrible. But now you can’t get them anymore in Seattle 🙁

          1. Fucking hipster. PBR? You’re as bad as Epi with his elitist nonsense.

            1. Avoiding a style or behaviour so as to avoid conformity is itself another form of conformity. In other words, just because hipsters have been known to drink PBR doesn’t mean I am going to stop.

              1. YOU LIE!

        5. Life’s too short for shitty beer.

          That said, drink what you like.

          1. So you’re in marketing for Warsteiner?

          2. Oddly enough, Warsteiner tastes pretty skunky to me.

            I agree with the sentiment, but on the other hand we do have all that gubmint debt to pay off…

            1. Other than the major American Belgian brews, the only beer I avoid like the plague is Leinenkugels. I’ve hated every fucking beer of theirs that I’ve tried.

              1. I’m of two minds about Leinenkugels. They aren’t particularly good but they have such an odd taste. Their . . . winter wheat(??) tastes like fruity pebbles. Which is kinda awesome even if not exactly appealing to drink.

                1. Yeah, that’s it. They overflavor their brews so much I wonder if their master brewer had his tongue burned off in the war.

                  1. DON’T MENTION THE WAR!

                2. I love fruity pebbles but don’t eat them so that beer is the shit.

          3. I had a grandfather who drank PBR by the case — literally. At the Big Nickle, his favorite drinking establishment, they’d order at least a case just for him on each and every Friday night, or so is the story I heard from the Burgess Meredith-lookalike bartender several years after Grandpa’s passing (and several decades after he stopped drinking).
            So my taste for cheap beer may be genetic — at least I got that goin’ for me.

        6. my go-to crap beer is yuengling if I buy it, but since I’m surrounded by hipsters sometimes it’s pbr or mickey’s malt liquor. I can stomache anything but that doesn’t mean I should.

          Yuengling is just great though, perfect balance of some flavor, lightness, cheapness, and drinkability.
          Everything cheap beer should be.

          1. Which Yuengling? They have a bunch of varities, several of which are quite good. I have long been a fan of Yuengling as a very good price/quality combo.

            I used to drink their porter and black and tan, until I realized just how many carb calories I was routinely ingesting and noticed my weight creeping up.

            I could get away with that when I was in my 20s, but no longer… fucking metabolism comes to screeching halt at 40.

            1. lager, I’m not a fan of their varieties. Seems to be a popular notion too, seeing as how the sampler pack and varieties regularly sell for less than bottles of plain ol lager.

        7. The Beast? Is that some sort of welfare beer, ? la government cheese? The only time I’ve ever consumed it was when I was so poor (college days), that a blow to the head was a reasonable form of inebriation.

        8. When I want water, I drink water. When I want beer I don’t want to drink water.

          1. Yep, it’s like sex in a canoe, that is, fucking close to water.

      3. You damned beer snobs!! Long live Bud Light, The Beast (aka Milwaukee’s Best), Coors Light and PBR!!!

    3. No one better bring up that shitty 420 ipa either. That shit is awful.

    4. All your beer choices suck, all mine are superior.

  4. “You’d have to drink almost six cans of Bud Light beer, or 67.2 ounces, to get the same amount of alcohol”
    Sigh.
    Just — sigh.

    1. Although there is a fun little game we could play:
      “You’d have to drink X amount of Y to get the same amount of alcohol…”

      1. You’d have to drink infinite bottles of O’Doul’s to get the same amount of alcohol…

        1. Sure, and get dihydrogen monoxide poisoning? No thanks.

        2. Actually, at 0.5%, it would only take 47 cans.

      2. You’d have to drink 3 1/3 bottles of Bud to get the same amount of alcohol as in one 40 oz. bottle of Bud.

      3. Remember the old fake SNL ad for “Colon Blow” cereal? With the late Phil Hartman.

        1. Colon Blowin’ you-oo-oo,
          In the mornin’.

    2. That would be slightly less than four regular Buds which isn’t enough to get you through a football game.

      1. First off, anybody that takes beer into a football game is a savage. If you’re not rocking Jack or Jim, well it’s not really a football game, is it?

        1. I save my jack for skiing.

    3. What a pussy this guy must be. 6 cans is what’s called “a warm up.”

    4. you’d have to eat twelve bowls of corn flakes to equal the vitamins and iron in just one bowl of total! I smell a new marketing campaign.

  5. arguing that it has never explicitly authorized the combination of alcohol with caffeine.

    And we never said you could mix your peas in with your mashed potatoes, either.

    Do as you’re told or how you think we would tell you,

    Love,
    FDA

    1. Oh, and no potatoes:

      (T)he Institute of Medicine, the health arm of the National Academy of Sciences, recommended that the U.S. Department of Agriculture stop participants of the federal Women, Infants and Children program, known as WIC, from buying potatoes with federal dollars. The institute also called for the USDA-backed school lunch program to limit use of potatoes.

      Under an interim rule, the USDA agreed to bar WIC participants from buying potatoes with their federal dollars. Potatoes are the only vegetable not allowed. Next year, the agency will roll out a final rule on the WIC program, which last year served 9.3 million children and pregnant and breast-feeding women considered at risk for malnutrition.

      The WIC program is a supplemental food program, and the determination was made that consumption of white potatoes was already adequate, said Christine Stencel, spokeswoman for the Institute of Medicine.

      “The recommendation was made to encourage consumption of other fruits and vegetables,” she said.

      http://www.breitbart.com/artic….._article=1

      1. Do Brady and Quinn know about this?

  6. “There’s no redeeming social purpose to be served by having the beverage,” Ramapao College President Peter Mercer told The Associated Press.

    What is the redeeming social purpose being served by hot tea you over educated moron?

    More evidence that all the education in the world is no match for natural stupid.

    1. People choose to buy it of their own volition. That’s the only “social purpose” a product and service should need to be legal.

      1. Some people on this blog would argue the mere exchange of money for a good based on supply and demand is a qualified redeeming social purpose.

    2. Is there a redeeming social purpose to Ramapao College?

  7. “In truth, though, drinking six cans of Bud Light (or even one) sounds scary in any context.”

    Awesome. ABC’s story is textbook yellow journalism, right? I would say this makes me sad if it was something new.

    1. That was Sullum’s little punch at a crappy beer, not ABC’s.

      1. Yeah, the awesome was for the shot at the crappy beer conglomerate. The comment about yellow journalism was about abc.

    2. What amazes me is that there is apparently no adult left at ABC News to step in and say “fix that crap, you sniveling carbuncle on the ass of Harry Reasoner!”

    3. Well it will soon be yellow journalism after drinking 6 cans of Bud Light.

  8. Ounce by ounce, in fact, Four Loko has less caffeine than coffee: 6.6 mg per ounce, compared to 8.3 mg per ounce for McDonald’s coffee, around 18 mg per ounce for store-bought drip coffee, and 50 mg per ounce for espresso.

    Does that mean that McDonald’s coffee is 46% drip coffee and 54% hot water? That seems entirely consistent with my observations.

    1. So I guess my continued self-imposed boycott of McDonald’s at all levels was a good choice even for breakfast, which I used to think was not horrifically awful at one point.

      How can that be called coffee? That’s almost suitable for Mormon consumption at that level of caffeine.

  9. This caffeinated alcohol shit has to be racist somehow too

    1. Now you see the dangers of Cuba Libre and why the Cuban craze of mixing alcohol and caffeine is dangerous!

    2. Only the menthol-flavored variety.

      1. Ah, now that leads to the question – what the hell is St. Ide’s doing if they’re letting special brew lose market share to caffeinated special brew?

    3. Only when sold in 40-oz bottles.

  10. ’tis a sad state of affairs when a college kid can’t handle booze and caffeine!

  11. “That was the only explanation we had,” for the heart attack, said Dr. McNamara….

    You could start with the patient lied to you and took a large dose of a drug he won’t tell you about because he could go to prison for admitting taking it…

    1. Did they do toxicology reports?

  12. Scaremongering fail, ABC. All this made me think of is how coffee + alcohol is the greatest idea ever. I am currently digging Southern Tier’s Jah*va coffee stout. And it has 10.4% ABV, oh noes!

    1. And nothing new. Not one of these ABC assholes would bat an eye if someone ordered a Baileys and coffee or coffee and Kahlua as an after-dinner drink.

      1. Or had a couple of cups of coffee to “sober up” after drinking a bottle of wine. I guess mixing it in a colorful can vs. your stomach is what makes it dangerous.

  13. So it’s about the same caffeine and alcohol as, say, a large irish coffee?

    1. If you make you coffee real weak, and like to water down your booze, then yeah, just like it.

  14. One New Jersey college banned the drinks this month after 23 students were hospitalized with alcohol-related problems. At least some of them reportedly drank Four Loko.

    At least some of them had attended class that very same day…

    Draw your own conclusions, America. But I’m not going to wait around while more children’s lives are destroyed by the menace which is Ramapo College!

    1. You forgot the “reportedly” ass-covering.

  15. There is always an infintesimal chance that a young person can get a heart attack or stroke. It’s the royal flush of the medical world.

  16. Why y’all tryin’ to gets up when you could be gettin’ down?

    Purple drank. Purple drank.

    1. Flaming Moe. Flaming Moe.

  17. One of the greatest drunk nights of my life was done on Irish coffees. I not only survived but felt pretty damn good the next day, after going to bed around 7 AM.

  18. Wine and dark chocolate: an alcohol/caffeine marriage of deadly proportions.

  19. Irish coffee anyone?

  20. One night, while in college, I was celebrating my birthday with some friends. Champagne and Bolivian Marching Powder, in large doses.

    I suddenly felt light-headed. My ears were ringing, and my heart was racing. I did the only thing that made any sense.

    I switched to whiskey.

    1. I found a 15-hour bender consisting of A.Y.C.D. champagne, mojitos, an assortment of Belgian wonderment, and 6 Ethiopian coffees before finishing it all off with half a dozen tall Strongbows to be quite painful.

      Nothing Bolivian or Colombian or Peruvian, though, which would have been instant deportation. On the other hand, I can’t be sure the Ethiopian coffee didn’t have khat or some shit in it, because it was both incredible and instantly addictive.

    2. If you can keep your head when all about you. Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you…

      1. You might be a redneck?

    3. “Nicotine, Valium, Vicodin, Marijuana, Ecstasy and Alcohol”

      I got close once, but I didn’t have any Valium. Just puts me to sleep anyway.

  21. It’s the royal flush of the medical world.

    Nah, the royal flush of the medical world is when some young idiot dumps his crotch rocket, suffers a fatal head injury, yet, bizarrely, filled out an organ donor card.

    Those organs don’t get transplanted for free, you know. Cha. Ching!!!

  22. Anyone interested in backing me on my idea for producing caffeine tipped assault rifle bullets?

    1. I was thinking about whiskey-flavored no-doz.

      Just a question, but are “flavored” cigarettes outlawed in any other states than California? (Excluding menthol, of course. We wouldn’t want to be racist

  23. Anyone that drinks that shit deserves what ever happens. We need to teach our children to drink real wine and beer. You can get an outstanding Spanish Red for under $10.

    1. It would only drive up the price.

  24. I’m a UCSB student, and currently this stuff is selling better than crack at my school at the present moment. I remember when I had a “pre-game” for the annual school concert here I bought a 30 pack of “Natural Light” (I’m a college student, I can’t afford better, don’t judge). Over 30 people showed up, and yet the case of “Natty” remained half-full til the bitter end thanks to damn near everyone drinking a 4 Loko. That stuff is far nastier than any ghetto swill you can imagine, and it will give you the worst diarrhea (it will literally turn it to the same color of the 4 Loko you just drank), but I also got to salute the ingenuity of the person who decided to combine alcohol and an energy drink in a can. They’ve made a lot of college students very happy and very drunk. Of course since the college crowd likes it, I knew it would only be a matter of time before the politicos in this country decided to ban it. I’m just shocked Santa Barbara hasn’t been the first.

    1. Can you explain why the fuck you guys throw tortillas onto the pitch before every UCSB men’s soccer game?

      You’re weird motherfuckers.

      P.S. Go Zips.

      1. Are you really bitching about free tortillas? I guess there’s just no pleasing some people.

        1. Well, I’m in Akron, only 2100 miles away. Them tortillas ain’t free.

      2. Akron fan? Wow… as a WMU grad student, I should probably apologize for this weekend, then.

        1. Only Akron soccer. The football team has always been and always will be completely worthless.

          WMU has a surprisingly effective soccer team, but they are about how NIU was a few years ago – thugs who are skilled enough to give teams that play actual soccer a tough go from time to time.

          Also, Akron was quite off the whole game. Coach Porter actually ripped his own team in the local paper. Should get them suitably fired up for top ten Creighton on Wednesday.

          1. To be clear, I’m an OSU grad, so Akron aside from soccer is pretty much nothing to me.

    2. Dude maybe you just have sensitive guts. I drank 4 loko all the time before they pulled it from Seattle shelves and have never had hangover or digestive problems from it.

  25. In case you aren’t still reading the Morning Links thread, the lulz are getting hilarious.

  26. Remember when drinking Jolt Cola and taking No Doz before going out gave us all heart attacks?

    Yeah, neither do I.

  27. Maybe they could add Poprocks” to the mix.

  28. Mmm. Sparks. When that first came out, I got a 4 pack for a dollar because Target had mislabeled it. I drank the four pack, and was promptly banned from ever having it again. Apparently, I became the same drunken asshole I always do, except I was hyperactive and wouldn’t shut up. The wife was more than somewhat displeased.

    Miller pulled the caffeine out of it, so what’s the point.

  29. Anyone interested in backing me on my idea for producing aspirin-fortified buzzy booze?

    1. Ulcer-in-a-can?

  30. If you are surprised that mixing energy drinks with alcohol can be dangerous, you are simply an idiot. You probably also think that reality TV shows aren’t scripted.

  31. Reminds me of a local irritant, the media and local governments have coalesced around the death of a student athlete this Summer practicing on the foot ball squad, who, on a rather mild day, a mere 83 that day, collapsed on the field and died. Heads have been called for for the chopping block, laws proposed, and heads have rolled because apparently his physical was not up to date. The autopsy showed the poor kid had a sickle cell condition that had not been previously diagnosed. All the commotion because sometimes people die, and there is not a Goddamn thing you can do to prevent it no matter how much you wish to diminish the quality of life of your fellow man to get you to that state of perfect bureaucratic regulated human existence that in your massively irrational heads you mistake for bliss.

    1. God bless the sicle-cell.

  32. There is caffee corretto and there’s everything else. Fucking beer-swilling right wingers.

  33. DAMNIT!!! I missed the epic brew thread GHAAA!!!!

    My late ass contribution: I can get all beers (that are distributed) at anytime I wish right here in sunny CO…SUCK IT BIOTCHES!. And Dogfish, Fat tire, FullSail, all good. Shock Top and Blue Moon, only when nothing else is on tap. Bud light? Not if it was the last drop on earth.

    Homebrew note: 15 gallons of Honey Orange Hefeweisen at my friends wedding was a huge hit…still have some left and will be drinking it soon. Next up, x-mas beer.

  34. Crunk juice.

  35. Fuck the prohibitionists. Caffeine and alcohol are legal and they should be legal to sell and consume whether separate or in combination as an energy drink or mixed drink like coffee liqueur or rum and coke, etc.

    1. The FDA wants to take my alcoholic energy drinks away! As if people haven’t been drinking rum and coke (and other alcohol+caffeine containing drinks) for over a century! ABC’s Good Morning America and several newspapers have run hysterical scare pieces reminiscent of prohibitionist journalism from the 1920s. The same h…ysterical crap that made absinthe virtually illegal to sell as a drink for most of the 20th century. Interestingly like caffeine, one botanical compound found in absinthe, thujone, shares an ability to modulate the GABA receptors. I really hope people start speaking up against this prohibitionist bullying, caffeine and alcohol are legal products and they should be allowed to be sold and consumed whether in a combination energy drink or a coffee liqueur, or a rum and coke! Economic and individual liberty is at stake.

  36. All these comments and no one corrected that last remark? Cocaine was only temporarily off the market, it’s back.

  37. get your police state out of my life 😉

    the italians, and likely every other high culture in existence, has been combining caffeine and alcohol for ages. Its common practice to take a coffee after a hard night of drinking. Yes the effects of the upper after the downer are meant to neutralize each other…or something. Also, try a cafe Corretto: espresso with a shot of grappa (acv 40-80%), cognac or the like.

  38. How about reducing alcohol intake instead?

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