No Sex Tonight, I'm on a Diet

Norway's bureaucrats discover boudoir cuisine:

Norway's largest erotic chain store was forced to change the labeling on products such as penis pasta, candy cuffs and chocolate body painting, to comply with Norwegian food regulations.

The Norwegian food safety authority, whose goal it is to make sure consumers have healthy and safe food, conducted a surprise inspection at one of the chain's stores and found that several products violated food labeling regulations, top-selling tabloid VG reported on Tuesday.

"We were a bit surprised to have the food safety authority on inspection. Food is not really our core product," Kjersti Antonsen, a sexual adviser in the store, told VG.

Products containing food must be marked with a Norwegian label, listing all ingredients.

"We have panties, bras, handcuffs and suspender belts made out of candy," Antonsen said, adding that the store will comply with the regulations and label all its food products.

This may be the biggest sex-meets-diet story since Rabbi Shmuley Boteach tackled the kosher status of semen.

Comments

The Wine Commonsewer | November 14, 2007, 11:38am | #

penis pasta

Oh, now there's a visual..............

probably inappropriate | November 14, 2007, 11:40am | #

I don't know whether or not semen is Kosher, but I have often wondered whether or not Vegans swallow.

gaijin | November 14, 2007, 11:46am | #

Out of what ingredients does one make penis pasta? Does the packaging come with preparation and serving instructions (e.g., drench in oil...serves three)

J sub D | November 14, 2007, 11:46am | #

Well, if your gonna regulate food, and listing the ingrediants is hardly onerous regulation, I guess edible panties fit in the category. Diabetics and sufferers of food allergies have kinky sex too.

VM | November 14, 2007, 11:48am | #

one problem was that the penis pasta didn't come with a warning that it expands in size during cooking. (and the importation of food wasn't per code)

you'd think that part would be self evident to anyone who knows how a penis works.

(besides the "thinking center for male")

megamerkin | November 14, 2007, 12:11pm | #

the penis pasta didn't come with a warning that it expands in size during cooking...
you'd think that part would be self evident to anyone who knows how a penis works.

Well, I for one didn't know that a penis grows when it's cooked. VM, do you do this often?

sv | November 14, 2007, 12:13pm | #

probably inappropriate | November 14, 2007, 11:40am | #

I don't know whether or not semen is Kosher, but I have often wondered whether or not Vegans swallow.

"she dont eat meat, but she sho' like the bone"

VM | November 14, 2007, 12:17pm | #

"Well, I for one didn't know that a penis grows when it's cooked. VM, do you do this often?"

certainly. Unless I have a headache, of course.

Then I stick to simple BATIN.

Happy Jack | November 14, 2007, 12:20pm | #

suspender belts made out of candy

Is this some novel way of dropping trou?

PapayaSF | November 14, 2007, 12:27pm | #

At first I thought the authorities were objecting on truth-in-labeling grounds: they can't call it "penis pasta" because it doesn't actually contain penises.

Something like this happened a while ago in Australia. The government tried to stop the import of Yves Saint-Laurent's Opium perfume on the grounds that it was falsely labeled.

The Wine Commonsewer | November 14, 2007, 12:47pm | #

Penis Pasta is like Ballpark Franks? It plumps when you cook it? Who knew that?

gaijin, [big smile] that crack reminds me of the best line from the Addaams Family movie:

Wanna buy some Girl Scout cookies?

Are they made out of real Girl Scouts?

Still LOL.

Phil | November 14, 2007, 12:56pm | #

I am disappointed! The Boteach link does NOT discuss if semen is kosher, just whether fellatio is permitted. Letdown!

anonymous Q | November 14, 2007, 1:34pm | #

How does one get to be a "sexual adviser"? That sounds like a fun job.

PintofStout | November 14, 2007, 1:39pm | #

Penis pasta, giving new meaning to the term 'wet noodle.'

prolefeed | November 14, 2007, 2:11pm | #

I don't know whether or not semen is Kosher, but I have often wondered whether or not Vegans swallow.

Laughed so hard I cried. "Probably inappropriate" wins the thread!

Becky | November 14, 2007, 3:51pm | #

Here is a great ecard to send a girlfriend that is dieting. Enjoy

http://www.rubberchickencards.com/content.php/action/play_card/id/521/

R C Dean | November 14, 2007, 4:55pm | #

I have often wondered whether or not Vegans swallow.

The only vegans I know are all lesbians, I'm afraid I can't really help, but there must be someone here who can give some personal testimony on this.

Rick Barton | November 14, 2007, 7:58pm | #

No diet tonight, Im on sex.