New at Reason: The Rick Santorum Candidate Profile

Not sure who to commit to in the Republican primary race? Let Reason help you out.

Picking a presidential candidate is like sorting through online dating profiles—nobody's quite right, but once a meet-cute is out of the question, the best you can hope for is to pick a mate out of a self-selected digital lineup. Today we’re focusing on Rick Santorum. We’ve got his horoscope, his nick-name, and his positions on the major issues facing the country.

Click here to find out if Rick Santorum is the candidate for you!

Editor's Note: We invite comments and request that they be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of Reason.com or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason at any time. Report abuses.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Thanks for the link, but I think we're all more than capable of performing a Google search to find this candidate's profile.

  • ||

    Oh man, you don't want to Google Santorum. It is not work safe. EWWWWWWW.

  • Kristen||

    (you ruined it Troy! FoE was trying to get the less internet literate among us to actually Google Santorum)

  • Apatheist||

    Humor detector fail

  • Tim||

    Um, aren't these all about six months too late?

  • Apatheist||

    Wait, the vote was six months ago? No wonder I keep hearing that Romney has already won.

  • ?||

    Aliases: The Scold, Ol' Man-on-Dog, Frothy Mixture

    Why doesn't anyone take libertarians seriously?

  • Joe M||

    Your mistake was in assuming these were serious profiles in the first place.

  • ?||

    No mistake. Comedy is serious business.

  • ?||

    Likewise politics, which is why few people take Reason seriously these days.

  • Kreel Sarloo||

    Maybe you're taking politics too seriously.

  • o4||

    comedy like RW radio entertainment is serious foaming n fundrai$ing

  • o4||

    ooops! i just foamed my [NUTZ]!

  • Apatheist||

    Why would anyone take Santorum seriously?

  • ||

    Why would anyone expect libertarians to discuss a nonserious candidate like Rick Santorum in a serious manner?

  • ||

    Should Santorum's Danzig-based theme song be "Brand New God" or "I Don't Mind the Pain"?

  • T||

    Left Hand Black.

  • juris imprudent||

    Maybe we need to expand the musical field - I'm thinking The Pogues "If I Should Fall From Grace with God".

  • ||

    The sad thing is, as hideous as most of these guys are, any one of them would be a better president than BO.

  • Wayne||

    I don't know about that. Santorum, Newt, Bachman, that is a pretty scary trio.

    We are so screwed.

  • Barely Suppressed Rage||

    Santorum makes me want to hurl.

  • T||

    Don't lick it up, then.

  • Pantless Deviant||

    Santorum's got no chance to win the GOP nomination, so anybody who really gives a shit about all this profile stuff is pissing in the wind (to mix my bodily function metaphors).

  • ||

    Santorum is this year's Huckabee. Book it.

    Cain's flaming out; Perry, Gingrich, and Bachmann are near dead; sociocons don't like Romney; and Ron Paul is Ron Paul.

  • mr simple||

    Huckabee didn't do well past Iowa, iirc. Who's this year's McCain?

  • ||

    Romney is McCain, Cain is Romney, Paul is Paul, Perry is Thompson, Bachmann is Brownback, and Huntsman is Hunter.

  • ||

    And Pawlenty is Giuliani

  • MWG||

    He may not be able to win the nomination, but in terms of who has the most punchable face between the candidates, Santorum wins by a huge margin.

  • ||

    So does this mean that Hit & Run will be reposting the Yummy Tears thread?

    I, for one, would like to know what the Santorum kids are up to these days.

  • anonymous commenter some guy||

    I would vote for santorum before I voted for Santorum.

  • Amanda ||

    maybe I will vote for him

  • Amanda ||

    I think he will be able to win the nomination.

GET REASON MAGAZINE

Get Reason's print or digital edition before it’s posted online

  • Progressive Puritans: From e-cigs to sex classifieds, the once transgressive left wants to criminalize fun.
  • Port Authoritarians: Chris Christie’s Bridgegate scandal
  • The Menace of Secret Government: Obama’s proposed intelligence reforms don’t safeguard civil liberties

SUBSCRIBE

advertisement