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Another Sign of Hard Economic Times: Sperm Bank Applications Up
More men are seeking to enhance their bottom lines by
selling a renewable resource located below their belts. According
to the financial reporting and advice blog Minyanville:
Applications for sperm donation are way up across the country. And why shouldn't they be? Selling sperm for cash has long been considered a get-rich-quick scheme of sorts for men during recessions.
Ty Kaliski, Director of Operations at Cryos International in New York told me that he's seen an increase of 50-100 applicants a week.
Scott Brown, Communications Manager at California Cryo -- one of the nation's oldest and largest sperm banks - told me that he's seen a 15-20% increase in potential donors.
How much could aspiring gamete generators earn?
While it's refreshing to think that thousands of young men are lining up to donate their DNA because it makes them feel good, the financial benefits of sperm donation are a more likely motivator.
At Biogenetics in Mountainside, New Jersey, men get paid $100 per sample. Donations are limited to a one-year window, but if you can manage two visits a week you could theoretically earn $10,400 (not to mention experiencing the rare, paternal joy of having fathered 104 kids).
Donors at Biogenetics can earn as much as $500 per sample if they enroll in a new program called Open ID that allows sperm recipients to meet the donors face to face.
So far only two individuals have participated in the new program.
And selling sperm nowadays involves more than just making an occasional deposit.
...you also have to be 5'10 or taller, go through a series of interviews, take numerous semen and blood tests, submit a family history that goes back at least 3 generations, and have graduated from or be enrolled in a 4-year university. Oh, and the competition is stiff. Most of the accepted donors have gone to places like Stanford, Princeton, Yale, and UCLA.
"It's easier to get into Harvard than Cryo," Brown joked.
Whole Minyanville article on this latest indicator of economic hardship can be found here.
Tomcat1066|9.1.09 @ 2:24PM|#
"Oh, and the competition is stiff."
I wonder if that was intentional, but it's funny as hell either
way.
Art-P.O.G.|9.1.09 @ 2:24PM|#
Damn, Kevin beat me to it. And the Open ID thing seems a little awkward.
Tomcat1066|9.1.09 @ 2:25PM|#
Damn, Kevin beat me to it. And the Open ID thing seems a
little awkward.
WALKS INTO ROOM AND LOOKS AT HUSBAND
TOM: Hi. I'm Tom, and I'll be impregnating your wife today. And you
are?
Ska|9.1.09 @ 2:33PM|#
While it's refreshing to think that
thousands of young men are lining up to donate their DNA because it
makes them feel good
The author must really love to think about other guys
masturbating.
|9.1.09 @ 2:36PM|#
At Biogenetics in Mountainside, New Jersey, men get paid
$100 per sample. Donations are limited to a one-year window, but if
you can manage two visits a week you could theoretically earn
$10,400
Oh, I've been able to "manage" more than two "visits" per week
since I was 12 or 13.
|9.1.09 @ 2:40PM|#
The height requirement is annoying. Its bad enough that women
care so much about height, but the fact that they don't even
require IQ testing is revealing.
Once genetic engineering is widely available, women will all try to
make their children above average in height. Eventually humanity
will consist of 14 feet tall morons.
|9.1.09 @ 2:46PM|#
I qualify, so I have no objections. I wonder if my wife would
let me do this if I offered to split the $52K? Hmmmmm.
Nah.
Tomcat1066|9.1.09 @ 2:50PM|#
Every sperm is sacred
Every sperm is great
When a sperm gets wasted
God gets quite irrate.
Federal Dog|9.1.09 @ 2:55PM|#
Is anyone else completely appalled by that sperm?
I mean, what kind of mind envisions sperm with teeth and
shades?
|9.1.09 @ 2:56PM|#
The height requirement is annoying. Its bad enough that
women care so much about height, but the fact that they don't even
require IQ testing is revealing.
Lifetime TV sez all men r dum. Watch it for a half hour and, if you
haven't blown your brains out in despair for the human race, you
wouldn't see any point in IQ testing men either.
|9.1.09 @ 2:56PM|#
I mean, what kind of mind envisions sperm with teeth and
shades?
Didn't we elect one Prez during the 90s?
EJM|9.1.09 @ 3:05PM|#
I mean, what kind of mind envisions sperm with teeth and
shades?
Along those lines, what kind of mind envisions sperm as tiny
microphones?
Ska|9.1.09 @ 3:08PM|#
I mean, what kind of mind envisions sperm with teeth and
shades?
Kind of looks like Jabberjaw.
|9.1.09 @ 3:12PM|#
You'd have to be out of your freaking mind to let the bun-warmer know who her baby daddy is. Why dangle another financial target in front of potential future single mother?
|9.1.09 @ 3:15PM|#
I mean, what kind of mind envisions sperm with teeth and
shades?
How did you think they got into the egg? They chew their way in.
Did you play pocket pool all the way through health class?
|9.1.09 @ 3:18PM|#
...the Open ID thing seems a little awkward...
If there isn't a Hallmark card for this already, there will be.
|9.1.09 @ 3:19PM|#
Check out the alt tag for a dig on a former reason
commenter.
It's especially cruel when you remember that he didn't have any
testicles and couldn't produce sperm. Just having slack and empty
wrinklesac flapping below a flaccid micropenis is why he was always
so angry, you know.
|9.1.09 @ 3:24PM|#
If there isn't a Hallmark card for this already, there will
be.
There is, but it's stuck together.
Sal Paradise|9.1.09 @ 3:25PM|#
5'10? Whew, I just made it. However, I'm really tired of being objectified by the matriarchy.
Ben Kenobi|9.1.09 @ 3:26PM|#
"You'd have to be out of your freaking mind to let the
bun-warmer know who her baby daddy is. Why dangle another financial
target in front of potential future single mother?"
RC--aren't there laws that absolve sperm donors of any sort of
parental or monetary responsibility?
Sal Paradise|9.1.09 @ 3:31PM|#
I'm not sure what the laws are, but I'm pretty sure I've read a couple of articles about donors getting hauled in before a judge and made to pay child support.
|9.1.09 @ 3:36PM|#
Hell, there have been poor saps with the same name who didn't produce the sperm that are on the hook for child support "cuz someone gotta pay!"
|9.1.09 @ 3:45PM|#
You know, you always hear that one man produces enough sperm to repopulate the planet. I'm surprised some dictator hasn't attempted to do that, at least in the country that he controls.
|9.1.09 @ 3:47PM|#
You know, you always hear that one man produces enough sperm to repopulate the planet. I'm surprised some dicktator hasn't attempted to do that, at least in the country that he controls.
Thread Jack-Off|9.1.09 @ 3:49PM|#
he Boeing Company [NYSE: BA] and the U.S. Air Force on Aug. 30
defeated a ground target from the air with the Advanced Tactical
Laser (ATL) aircraft, demonstrating ATL's first air-to-ground,
high-power laser engagement of a tactically representative
target.
During the test, the C-130H aircraft took off from Kirtland Air
Force Base, N.M., and fired its high-power chemical laser through
its beam control system while flying over White Sands Missile
Range, N.M. The beam control system acquired the ground target --
an unoccupied stationary vehicle -- and guided the laser beam to
the target, as directed by ATL's battle management system. The
laser beam's energy defeated the vehicle.
http://boeing.mediaroom.com/index.php?s=43&item=817
|9.1.09 @ 3:57PM|#
"The laser beam's energy defeated the vehicle." What does this mean? Defeated how?
William Jefferson Clinton|9.1.09 @ 3:57PM|#
"You know, you always hear that one man produces enough sperm to
repopulate the planet. I'm surprised some dictator hasn't attempted
to do that, at least in the country that he controls."
I gave it my best.
Snoopy|9.1.09 @ 4:01PM|#
"Check out the alt tag for a dig on a former reason
commenter."
Up yours Ronald Baily!
|9.1.09 @ 4:01PM|#
demonstrating ATL's first air-to-ground, high-power laser
engagement of a tactically representative target.
Good thing someone remembered to clean their optics.
Snoopy|9.1.09 @ 4:06PM|#
Today, President Obama's campaign organization "Organizing for
America" sent out a notice to its "grassroots" supporters. It asked
them to wage a coordinated phone campaign for health care by
calling their U.S. Senators on September 11 - also known as Patriot
Day in honor of the thousands of Americans killed by Al Qaeda
terrorists eight years ago. It goes on: "All 50 States are
coordinating in this - as we fight back against our own Right-Wing
Domestic Terrorists who are subverting the American Democratic
Process, whipped to a frenzy by their Fox Propaganda Network
ceaselessly re-seizing power for their treacherous leaders." Please
read that again.
http://blog.heritage.org/2009/09/01/obamas-team-crosses-the-rhetorical-line/
|9.1.09 @ 4:12PM|#
http://blog.heritage.org/2009/09/01/obamas-team-crosses-the-rhetorical-line/
fuck those god damned sons of bitches!
these people are so fucking stupid, at least they're stupid enough
to continually tip their hands...
guy|9.1.09 @ 4:13PM|#
Just think, future parents, your kids could grow up to one day find themselves in a classroom on September the 8th, posed with the question, "What is the President trying to tell me? What is the President asking me to do?"
Master Debater|9.1.09 @ 4:20PM|#
When I think of the money that, over the years, I've let slip through my fingers...
Cliché Bandit|9.1.09 @ 4:21PM|#
SF, You are always ready with either a disturbing piece of prose
or an 80s movie reference. This thread is why I read comment.
LOL
|9.1.09 @ 4:23PM|#
Why don't they simply round up potential right-wing terrorists and ship them to Guantanamo?
|9.1.09 @ 4:25PM|#
Thanks, Cliché Bandit,
Hopefully
you're reading this thread. I'm droppin' science knowledge in
y'all's brainholes.
|9.1.09 @ 5:00PM|#
From the bottom of that Organizing for America web page
"41953690525 people have signed up to attend this event".
WTF
|9.1.09 @ 8:07PM|#
Would you could you spank on a plane
Would you could you spank on a train
I would I could if the price is right
I would I will for $100 alright
|9.2.09 @ 1:23AM|#
Lifetime TV sez all men r dum. Watch it for a half hour and,
if you haven't blown your brains out in despair for the human race,
you wouldn't see any point in IQ testing men either.
Lifetime does have one show that treats men with respect: Army
Wives. I highly recommend it.
|9.2.09 @ 3:28AM|#
Canada has only 33 sperm donors.
Canadian Fertility and Andrology Society estimates that up to
80 per cent of babies conceived in Canada through donor sperm have
American DNA.
Can the offspring produced by Yank wank US male sperm,
get citizenship or just a green card? Do Yank sperm exports fall
under NAFTA? Or maybe the softwood lumber agreement?
We had Cash for Clunkers, so how about Yank wank for Canada.
It shouldn't be too hard for this to come to a head through a
mutual exchange of goods and services. The two countries could pull
together on the issue. It could lead to a positive and moving
climax and eject President Obama out of the current domestic
stickiness and on to new realms where he can release, again, his
seeds of hope and change on new ground. The time for mouthing
slippery platitudes has come and gone. The President must now grab
on to something he can handle. And I have no doubt the President
can manipulate this skillfully. It seems there's a fertile opening
to engage with our neighbor to the north. The neighbor who accepts
a less rigid type of international intercourse. And handling this
in a smooth and skillful way, will eventually release the pressure
while stiffening the President's currently softening domestic
pole poll numbers. Let's all do this, and pull with
the President right now.
jtuf|9.2.09 @ 6:38AM|#
While it's refreshing to think that thousands of young men are lining up to donate their DNA because it makes them feel good, the financial benefits of sperm donation are a more likely motivator.
I'm sure that feeling good is part of the process of sperm
donation.
Art-P.O.G.|9.2.09 @ 7:12AM|#
You know, you always hear that one man produces enough sperm to repopulate the planet. I'm surprised some dictator hasn't attempted to do that, at least in the country that he controls.
I hear Genghis Khan probably got the closest.
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