Katherine Mangu-Ward | October 10, 2008
A delightful display of cheerful cynicism and
despair from The Wall Street Journal's Kim Strassel, who
writes in the voice of a carnival barker touting the
Great Obama's magic act. Don't look too hard at the image at
right, or he'll hypnotize you.
Watch the Great Obama perform a feat never yet managed in all history. He will create that enormous new government health program, spend billions to transform our energy economy, provide financial assistance to former Soviet satellites, invest in infrastructure, increase education spending, provide job training assistance, and give 95% of Americans a tax (ahem) cut—all without raising the deficit a single penny! And he'll do it in the middle of a financial crisis. And with falling tax revenues! Voila!
And this:
For tonight's finale, the Great Obama will uphold America's "moral" obligation to "stop genocide" by abandoning Iraq! While teleported to the region, he will simultaneously convince Iranian leaders to peacefully abandon their nuclear pursuits (even as he does not sit down with them), fix Afghanistan with a strategy that does not resemble the Iraqi surge, and (drumroll!) pull Osama bin Laden out of his hat!
Shouldn't trust the man, though. Look at how much stuff he keeps in his pockets. Got to be a doubleheaded coin in there somewhere.
Via R. G.
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