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You're Old Enough to Know Better, So Cry, Baby, Cry
The week began with "Leave Britney Alone," and I apologize if you click that link with your audio turned above 10 decibels.
The week is ending, mercifully, with "Leave General Petraeus
Alone."
Not as funny as it could be. The original Britney rant (which has 5
million views now) was directed at bloggers (especially Perez
Hilton), whereas the Bush rant is a "message from the President of
the United States" gone wrong. But the message is clear: The
shoreside Petraeus adherents are basically fanboys, and the
Republican reaction to MoveOn's ad was as mature as a demisexual
man-boy's Britney meltdown.
Coming next (I hope): Godley and Creme's video for "Cry," remixed to include the weepin' mugs of John McCain, Joe Lieberman, and Fred Thompson.
UPDATE: A better parody from the other side:
Billy Beck|9.14.07 @ 2:09PM|#
To think that Oscar Wilde has run to all this in only barely a
century.
Appalling.
|9.14.07 @ 2:10PM|#
I can't believe anybody looking at the Chris Crocker video
mistook that for something authentic. It was sad enough when we
collectively laughed so hard at tongue-tied Ms. South Carolina that
spittle hung from our chin. But now we laugh at a fake
meltdown?
The Bush Crocker video is kinda funny. Imagine how funny it would
be if the flamer kid hadn't done it first.
|9.14.07 @ 2:13PM|#
So accusing a four star general and the military at large of betraying the country of treason is mature? I am a firm believer in civilian control of the military. The military is not and should never be above criticism. At the same time, disagreement and criticism is not what moveon did. What they did was before Petreus said a word, not knowing his testimony accused him of treason. Of betraying the country and putting his own personal gain over his duty to the Constitution. Not just Petreus but by implication the entire military. That is despicable and the Republicans had every right call them out for it and call out the Democrats in Congress, whom moveon publicly claims to "own" to distance themselves from it. Everyone who is not a moonbat thought that the add was out of line. The ad totally spent all of the political capital the Democrats had to attack Petreus with and essentially handed the most important political week since the 06 election to the Republicans. If I didn't know better I would think Moveon was being run by a group of Karl Rove funded plumbers. As it is, the ad back fired and that is why Weigel and his DNC handlers are screaming like stuck pigs about how "immature" the Republican response was.
|9.14.07 @ 2:16PM|#
Conservatives are pretty good at visual parodies like the
Eisenhower one, but lose the wit when it gets to the text.
The text under the fake ad looks like it was written by a 4th
grader.
|9.14.07 @ 2:17PM|#
Ahh, that's a great Eisenhower parody....if FDR were a
Republican, or Eisenhower were a Democrat.
Still, pretty good at first blush. I can't blame right wingers for
not thinking the details through.
|9.14.07 @ 2:18PM|#
"What they did was before Petreus said a word, not knowing
his testimony accused him of treason."
To be fair, Petraeus cooked the books back in 2004, claiming
significant progress and successes that weren't happening.
|9.14.07 @ 2:25PM|#
Seen during the Civil War:
General Grant
or
General Take American Lives for Granted?
Episiarch|9.14.07 @ 2:31PM|#
GO DAN GO!
What is this, a Fark thread without the visuals? Pretty funny,
though, Dan.
the ad back fired and that is why Weigel and his DNC handlers
are screaming like stuck pigs about how "immature" the Republican
response was
John, you are usually pretty level-headed, but come on. "DNC
handlers"? Not that Weigel needs me to defend him but that's just
absurd.
|9.14.07 @ 2:33PM|#
Cuz of course, no one, no one, ever hilariously compared the names Obama to Osama. That would never have happened.
|9.14.07 @ 2:39PM|#
General Lee, or General Leave Us Alone?
This will be the new internet meme, you saw it here first.
Fluffy|9.14.07 @ 2:44PM|#
Lamar is correct.
Since Petraeus' 2004 claims of progress were ultimately proven
wrong, we are justified in speculating on why they were wrong. As
far as I can tell the choices are:
1. He was right, but subsequent events led to a significant change
in the direction of the war.
2. He was wrong, but not deliberately so. He was merely mistaken,
and is incompetent but not dishonest.
3. He deliberately provided false claims of progress to support the
President politically.
4. He's one of those army officers who always exaggerates the
positive and downplays the negative, because he sees this as part
of his job of "keeping up morale" and "maintaining political
support for the military objective".
Now, personally I think #4 is the most likely answer. But as long
as #3 and #4 are possibilities, Moveon.org is perfectly entitled to
run their ad. If we can debate which one of these is the truth,
Moveon gets to participate in that debate and their ad is one way
of doing so.
|9.14.07 @ 2:47PM|#
"General Take American Lives for Granted"
"General Leave Us Alone"
"Generally Barely American"
"General Make Things Awful"
In general, you guys suck at this.
Stomps off, desparately trying to make something funny out of
Schwartzkopf. I mean funnier than the literal translation.
|9.14.07 @ 2:49PM|#
sixstring,
I'm with you. The best I had was General War is Tough, but that's
massively lame.
JBinMO|9.14.07 @ 2:53PM|#
I am pretty sure that the point of the add was to build credibality. Move on is so sure that things are going to go bad that they want to be able to say in a year, "look, we said this in September and now were proved right".
|9.14.07 @ 3:02PM|#
We are talking about the same General Petraeus whose boss,
Admiral Fallon (the chief of CENTCOM), labeled : "an
ass-kissing little chickenshit" ?
Yes this Petraeus fellow is definitely above reproach.
|9.14.07 @ 3:07PM|#
General Patton or General Sat In A Pile of Crap?
ahhh, good times. My meager intellectual resources are spent for
the day.
|9.14.07 @ 3:14PM|#
Lemme go back to the Cold War for a few:
General Westmoreland or General Death for man
General Curtis LeMay or General Launch'em Today
Ryo|9.14.07 @ 3:24PM|#
General Tommy Franks or Generally too many mistakes?
General Benedict Arnold or Generally being a dick to the old?
|9.14.07 @ 3:24PM|#
"Is that pronounced Lame-r?"
I don't care how you pronounce it as long as you say it and don't
spray it.
|9.14.07 @ 3:36PM|#
General Curtis LeMay or General Launch'em Today
Probably the most accurate one thus far...
|9.14.07 @ 3:40PM|#
""""What they did was before Petreus said a word, not knowing
his testimony accused him of treason.""""
The WH has used a general in the past to dish out deception, and it
was well known in advance that the White House had a major hand in
it.
Burn me once shame on you, burn me twice shame on me. After Powell,
any general speaking in favor of the WH must earn credibility, that
credibilty can no longer be assumed. I wish that wasn't true.
Not to mention the right-wing has played the "treason" card. It's a
card that neither side should play and I think Moveon was wrong for
it. But that has become the nature of politics in this country
today and that's the fault of both sides.
|9.14.07 @ 3:49PM|#
No. I don't think Weigel had DNC handlers. It is just fun to
insult him.
Most of you people are anti-war. My question is why aren't you
livid at moveon? The vast majority of the American people left or
right are not going to tolerate claiming Petreus is a traitor. They
handed the whole week over to Bush just to make some jackass self
absorbed emotional rant. If they had kept their mouths shut, the
Democrats in Congress could have respectfully listened to Petreus
and said "thanks for you service General but we just don't think
that there is anyway to keep the peace in Iraq without an open
ended and huge commitment of US troops, something we are not going
to do. The military is doing a brave of a job and you are doing
your best effort to put lipstick on this pig, but the sad fact is
that those stupid barbaric Iraqis are incapable of running their
own country and we need to stop kidding ourselves and come home
now." They could have killed Bush this week. Instead Moveon comes
out and basically makes anyone who goes after Petreus associated
with Macarthyite moonbats. They just blew it. They proved it is all
about Moveon and their various egos and neurosis and nothing about
actually getting political results. Seriously, you guys should hate
those fucks.
|9.14.07 @ 3:52PM|#
And, for the obligatory Friday hot girl clip, here's Ms. South
Carolina. Turn the volume off if you just want to ogle, up if you
want a good laugh:
Hot Dumb
Girl
SIV|9.14.07 @ 3:54PM|#
Ahh, that's a great Eisenhower parody....if FDR were a
Republican, or Eisenhower were a Democrat.
Still, pretty good at first blush. I can't blame right wingers for
not thinking the details through.
Lamar,
WTF are you talking about? Are you such a fucking partisan dumb ass
that you think Eisenhower was a "Republican General" ?
Is Petraeus a "Republican General"?
|9.14.07 @ 4:12PM|#
What If MoveOn.org Existed 65 Years Ago?
Accusing Eisenhower of treason? Maybe they would have called them
something like, I don't know, the John Birch Society. Dirty
hippies.
|9.14.07 @ 4:14PM|#
My question is why aren't you livid at moveon?
Because while I'm not calling for Petraeus to be tried for treason
and executed, I remeain convinced that he has allowed his personal
ambition to color his judgment. His evaluation of the situation,
and therefore his leadership, is contributing to aggravating a
misguided and unmitigated failure of foreign policy. So from my
perspective, while I don't endorse MoveOn's ad, I find it not so
far off the mark.
|9.14.07 @ 4:14PM|#
In the arena of extreme hatered politics, deceptive political rhetoric, name calling, and lies. I'm yet to be convinced that Moveon is more guilty, or engaged in piss-poor distasteful tactics, more so than the other side.
|9.14.07 @ 4:19PM|#
"So from my perspective, while I don't endorse MoveOn's ad, I
find it not so far off the mark."
You are like in the 10% minority on that. Maybe your 10% is right,
but that doesn't change the reality that Moveon did more harm than
good to your side by running the ad. If nothing else you should
loath them for stupidity. Further, if it is okay for MoveOn to run
that ad, then I guess it is also okay for its opponents to claim
that those who call for a pullout are actively helping the
enemy.
|9.14.07 @ 4:23PM|#
"""I guess it is also okay for its opponents to claim that those
who call for a pullout are actively helping the enemy."""
That mantra has received more airplay than anything Moveon
produce.
|9.14.07 @ 4:25PM|#
Is Petraeus a "Republican General"?
Short answer: Yes.
I want to know how come General Petraeus has so much more "lettuce"
on his uniform than General Eisenhower.
|9.14.07 @ 4:27PM|#
I can't stand moveon, code pink, International ANSWER or any of the other groups that continually embarass the anti-war point of view and don't help a freaking thing.
Fluffy|9.14.07 @ 4:28PM|#
Too bad, John.
10% minority? Whatever. When 90% of the public supports the
President's Iraq policy, get back to me.
Frankly, I think the ad was helpful. Regardless of what the quick
reaction polls say, it deeply planted the seed of the thought that
people should not uncritically accept what Petraeus has to say.
That's worth a little bad press. The administration's entire
political strategy here is to try to buy some more time by hitting
the reset button. Since Bush has played the "We're making progress"
card too many times, they had to send someone else out to do it,
and they chose Petraeus. Anything that shakes his credibility makes
it more difficult for Bush to run out the clock by recycling old
bullshit progress claims and crappy slogans.
|9.14.07 @ 4:29PM|#
I don't know what Petreaus's voter registration card sez. But
all active duty Generals are lackies for the C in C. Political
party is irrelevent. It may be easy to call him a Republican
because it is his duty to serve the Republican President.
"""I want to know how come General Petraeus has so much more
"lettuce" on his uniform than General Eisenhower."""
I don't know, but these day's they will give out a Silver Star for
being shot by friendly fire if it serves their purpose.
|9.14.07 @ 4:35PM|#
My question is why aren't you livid at moveon?
Because they piss guys like you off.
|9.14.07 @ 4:36PM|#
I want to know how come General Petraeus has so much more
"lettuce" on his uniform than General Eisenhower.
They give medals for any goddam thing these days. Awards inflation,
like grade inflation, sucks to an honest observer.
|9.14.07 @ 4:42PM|#
"The text under the fake ad looks like it was written by a 4th
grader."
That's nothing. I'm old enough to recall a time when Reason's
headlines were witty.
|9.14.07 @ 4:56PM|#
The paradoy add is much better. Only thing is that Ike did stop
the Korean war.
While he did quietly tolerate McCarthism in the government under
his watch (see the Oppenhemier hearings), he also railed against
the military industrial complex (which has expanded to massively
corrupt proportions in Iraq).
I'd expect the current crop of 'wingers would be pretty against Ike
and his policies (like when he sideded w/ them A-rabs in the Suez
crisis in '56).
|9.14.07 @ 4:59PM|#
I'm still waiting for some sort of proof on how the moveon add was so damaging for the anti-war crowd. Maybe that was a right-wing urban legend.
|9.14.07 @ 5:02PM|#
Ike wouldn't fit in well with the Modern Republican Party.
He'd throw KBR, Boeing, et al out on their asses. He did side with
the Arabs during Suez, fire McArthur and end the Korean War and
build the interstate highway system. Not exactly a Red State kind
of guy.
|9.14.07 @ 5:13PM|#
There was no end to the Korean war. It's been a ceasefire. The President of South Korea wanted Bush to officially end it. Bush wasn't interested.
|9.14.07 @ 5:43PM|#
Pug
Actually Truman fired McArthur. But it took Ike to end the war (or
at least get a ceasefire).
I'm not sure how McArthur would have handled having his longtime
aide (who he referred to as "the best clerk I ever had", when Ike
won the election) as CinC. But then I'm not sure that Ike would
have given some of the boneheaded orders Truman did either.
Jim Treacher|9.14.07 @ 7:21PM|#
The text under the fake ad looks like it was written by a 4th grader.
Yeah, it doesn't have the subtle sophistication of "General Betray
Us."
|9.14.07 @ 8:23PM|#
Yeah, it doesn't have the subtle sophistication of "General Betray Us."
Or "MorOn.org." Another gem.
|9.14.07 @ 8:40PM|#
"The President of South Korea wanted Bush to officially end
it."
BRING THE TROOPS HOME!!!
I definitely think it would be interesting to see how long it would
take NK to invade the south if the USA wasn't there to protect the
ungrateful idiots. I'm bone tired of hearing them whine about the
USA - I say let them take care of themselves.
The troops now in Korea should be on our own border stopping "La
Reconquista".
bill|9.14.07 @ 9:04PM|#
Seth Green's is way funnier.
http://www.spikedhumor.com/articles/125410/Seth_Green_Chris_Crocker_Rant.html
|9.14.07 @ 9:43PM|#
The Fury of the Legions
"We had been told, on leaving our native soil, that we were going
to defend the sacred rights conferred on us by so many of our
citizens settled overseas, so many years of our presence, so many
benefits brought by us to populations in need of our assistance and
our civilization.
"We were able to verify that all this was true, and because it was
true, we did not hesitate to shed our quota of blood, to sacrifice
our youth and our hopes. We regretted nothing, but whereas we over
here are inspired by this frame of mind, I am told that in Rome
factions and conspiracies are rife, that treachery flourishes, and
that many people in their uncertainty and confusion lend a ready
ear to the dire temptations of relinquishment and even to vilify
our actions.
"I cannot believe that all this is true, and yet recent wars have
shown how pernicious such a state of mind could be and to where it
could lead.
"Make haste to reassure us, I beg you, and tell us that our fellow
citizens understand us, support us, and protect us as we ourselves
are protecting the glory of the Empire.
"If it should be otherwise, if we should have to leave our bleached
bones on these desert sands in vain, then beware the fury of the
Legions."
Centurion Marcus Flavinius, Second Cohort, Augusta Legion to his
cousin Tertullus in Rome. No date given.
|9.14.07 @ 9:47PM|#
It was indeed Truman who fired McArthur. My mistake.
Chris Matthews had an interesting observation on the Betray Us ad
tonight. He said it is easier to attack the anti-war crowd than to
defend the war. I haven't seen many except Red State, Powerline, et
al charge to the defense of what Bush had to say last night.
This reminds me of Kerry's flubbed "stuck in Iraq" joke before the
2006 elections. The right thought they had struck gold, but they
still got clobbered in the elections. It is getting harder and
harder to distract the voters because they want the war over. I
have to think they were much more focused on what Bush had to say
than some dumb ad in The New York Times.
Douglas Gray|9.14.07 @ 10:25PM|#
Petraeus is in an awkward position; he has to support a megalomaniacal Commander-in-Chief, try to keep up morale, (like a cheer leader whose team is behind), and be truthful to Congress, all at the same time. He's a good man and a good general, but his position sucks.
|9.15.07 @ 11:26AM|#
Political name-puns are stupid no matter which side they're
coming from. Whether it's "Hitlery" or "Shrub" or "Obamination" or
"Prick Cheney," they have no value except to signal "I dislike this
person," which is about as useful and illuminating as hearing what
a stranger had for breakfast last Tuesday. They're the lowest form
of argument; actually, they're not an argument at all. They reflect
the thought process of a 3rd grader, who doesn't know or care about
persuading and just wants to be mad.
They do serve one good purpose, however. Their presence on a given
blog or web page are a quick, handy way to know that you can move
ahead and click elsewhere.
|9.15.07 @ 12:16PM|#
The most stupid nick name for Republicans I ever saw was on a left-wing blog. They called them "RethugliKKKlans". How witty.
|9.15.07 @ 2:05PM|#
SIV: Perhaps I am swayed by Eisenhower's election to the presidency as a, how you say, Republican? One doesn't have to be a partisan shill to recognize simple facts. Eisenhower wasn't a rank partisan, you shouldn't be one either. Petraeus, on the other hand, plies his trade in what seems to be a more polarized partisan atmosphere.
Ray G|9.16.07 @ 1:07AM|#
Quick, I'm having a stupid moment. There should be a ton of
material out there for Wesley Clark, but I'm blank.
An aside, it says a lot about Ike that he didn't have all of his
ribbons on for that photo. The Army gives away awards like candy on
halloween, and doubly so for their officers. Once they hit major
general and beyond, they give them medals just for waking up in the
morning.
Very modest for someone who still had the ego to run for
president.
|9.16.07 @ 10:23AM|#
John the Concern Troll.
When your opponent gives you tactical advice...DON'T TAKE IT.
|9.16.07 @ 10:57AM|#
Letterman ended his monologue bit about Britney Spears' on-stage
collapse with, "...but General Petraeus said it went great!"
Leno told a joke about the Secret Service going on alert because
they couldn't find President Bush. "But it turned out to be a false
alarm. He was hiding behind General Petraeus."
The Republican War Party is desperate to party like it's 2002, but
it ain't. Everybody sees through this little charade, the country
is still 2:1 against continuing this war, and Patraeus's testimony
came across as just another round of the same "stay the course"
bs.
Everbody, that is, except the increasingly irrelevant True
Believers.
|9.16.07 @ 12:33PM|#
The Weekly Standard just suckered John and us Hit and Run posters. I didn't notice any poster previously debunking the fallacy. The moveon.org add DID NOT level the charge of treason at the General. NO WHERE in the add is the word treason used. Betrayal does not equal treason. This is a major discrepancy introduced by the right-wing media to discredit Moveon.org. The media, and many others fell for it.
|9.16.07 @ 8:12PM|#
General Tommy Franks or Generally too many mistakes?
General Benedict Arnold or Generally being a dick to the
old?
Ok, you lose the thread.
|9.16.07 @ 8:20PM|#
Accusing Eisenhower of treason? Maybe they would have called
them something like, I don't know, the John Birch Society. Dirty
hippies.
At least the John Birch Society considered being a communist spy
treason. A Move On equivalent would've applauded it.
Hindsight|9.16.07 @ 8:41PM|#
Hey Grand Chalupa, why didn't you just go ahead and say MoveOn would've aligned themselves with America First, or the Confederacy, or the Redcoats? I hear they hate mom and apple pie too, why didn't you mention that?
Fourth-grader|9.16.07 @ 9:09PM|#
They reflect the thought process of a 3rd grader, who doesn't know or care about persuading and just wants to be mad.
I am so ashamed.
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